Written by Alexandra Elle
Illustrated by Ashleigh Kinsey
© 2013 by Alexandra Elle
All Rights Reserved.
Words from a Wanderer: Notes & Love Poems
By: Alexandra Elle
To my little Bunni.
“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.
- J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
At twenty-three I am now aware that I’m not crazy nor am I the only person in the world who talks to themselves. Writing has been a passion of mine since before I can remember. Being able to put words on paper has been a saving grace because many days I cannot find the words to say out loud—so I write them down. This little book is a compilation of some comforting things I’ve had to tell myself to get through the toughest days of my life. I remember there was a period of time that I didn’t write, I couldn’t and it was mainly because I didn’t want to. It was nerve wracking to face my truth and I was extremely hard on myself for making so many mistakes. I learned a lot during the silence. My pages were blank but my mind was on fire. When I picked up a pen and started to write again, my work was different. It wasn’t filled with sorrow, anxiety, hurt or fear. My words started to become comforting, full of understanding, honesty and forgiveness. I started writing notes to myself because a little self-love can go a long way. I no longer seek validation from others nor do I rely on the outside world to tell me how worthy I am or how amazing I can be. I have finally fallen in love with myself and it’s the best feeling on earth to wake up and know that I am truly loved from the inside out.
-Alex Elle
#anote2self
Dear Self,
I know you struggle sometimes but just in case I don’t tell you enough, you’re beautiful. Thank you for being so strong and transparent. The world sees you even when you feel invisible. I appreciate your heart and your stubbornness. Your willingness to love even after being discarded and forgotten is admirable. I am so proud to know that you’ve grown to acknowledge your worth.
With Love,
Self
#anote2self
Resilient Self,
Your past was practice. The mistakes you’ve made along the way have motivated your mission! Trust and believe that you’re on the right track.
Love Always,
Self
Courageous Self,
Make an effort to finish what you start. You know from experience that giving up has gotten you nowhere. Work harder than you think you did yesterday!
Much Love,
Self
The heart is resilient and forgiving. It is the mind that causes us stress.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
Seasons change. People grow together and apart. Life moves on. You will be OK. Embrace it.
Hugs,
Self
Dear Self,
You are not that broken or that battered. You’re not that bruised and your spirit isn’t shattered. Keep in mind how resilient you really are. Do not allow fear from your past experiences disable your courage in the future.
Don’t be afraid,
Self
Worthy Self,
You are not just a “play thing” or an option on anyone’s roster. You are not disposable or unimportant. You are worthy of time, gentleness and adoration. Please do not settle or worry. Timing is everything and there is a love waiting especially for you.
Be patient,
Self
Dream Chaser
I get angry with him when I wake and he’s no longer there.
I curse the fact that he visits at night then flees in the morning before the rising of a new sun.
My heart aches for the last kiss that I never get. He always vanishes before I’m given the chance to loosen my grip from his fingertips.
He stays patient when I fly off the handle. He knows I want him to stay so I am ensured by his words that my heart he has no intent to trample.
Calmly he repeats, every morning when I call yelling, “I’m right where you left me, you’re the one who leaves.”
I guess it’s not his fault that he can’t come with me when I awake from my dreams.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
If you keep going backwards with the same people that God has intentionally removed from your life, you will continue to stay stuck. There is no joy in being confused and unhappy. Get rid of old bad habits and leave them where they belong. What is meant for you will be yours. Learn to let go. Dysfunction isn’t love.
Sincerely,
Self
Dear Self,
Continue to walk in your purpose. Allow God to guide your footsteps and positivity will lead your thoughts.
Love,
Self
#anote2self
Dear Self,
I am glad you are learning to be quiet. You’re amazing with words but sometimes in the midst of not so beautiful times silence is golden.
Love,
Self
Reflect
As he awakens his mane flows freely; pieces of which are still intertwined in his Queen’s fingers. He doesn’t mind that her grip is tight when it comes to him.
He watches her sleep with love in his eyes; wondering why it took so long for him to see such a beautiful reflection.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
Know your boundaries and respect your limits. Sometimes the answer to others has to be “no.” If you keep overextending yourself you will have nothing left to give when the time is right.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
I do not thank you enough for evolving into such a strong person, mother, daughter and friend. I love you. Most days I overlook how far you’ve come. Keep sowing seeds of peace and continue to be the resilient woman that I know you are.
Always and forever,
Self
Dear Self,
They don’t have to believe you now. You’ll show them. Don’t say a word.
Love,
Self
Raise your sons to respect women, your daughters to respect themselves and vice versa.
Raise your daughters to love their sisters so that one day they can work together without competition in mind.
Show your sons what love looks like. Allow them to cry and grow so they can blossom and become men who are not scared of emotions but compassionate toward the feelings of others.
Our children are sacred.
Try to set an amazing foundation for them the best way you know how.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
It’s important that we start to respect one another because when we do love will follow.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
Assumptions will ruin your beautiful mind. Be aware of what you’re entertaining even in thought.
Love and Light,
Self<
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Dear Self,
Listen, learn, love and live. You owe yourself knowledge and peace.
Blessings,
Self
Hell and Back: Devil Dance, PT 1.
When you’ve lived in hell life becomes a bit easier to stomach and a tad bit sweeter to swallow.
The little things don’t wear you down as much and the burdens of daily struggles seem to be accomplished with ease.
I’ve been to hell and back—it wasn’t as hot there as I had imagined.
Maybe that was because my soul was already set on fire or my heart had been torched and scarred with burns by past lovers.
I wasn’t sure why the temperature didn’t bother me.
I walked around barefoot with the devil and wasn’t sure how I ended up hand in hand with him.
On any account, it wasn’t on purpose…
He showed me around and we bartered my soul.
I didn’t want to stay there but he wouldn’t let me go.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
Please do not be foolish. People treat you how you allow them to. If you want different results stop settling with the same people and for the same things. If you want to see a change in your existence, be the change. Life isn’t as complicated as we make it and love isn’t as hard as we claim it is. If you want something, work for it. Be honest in your actions and give the world great reasons to love you. Smile at yourself every once in a while just because. Continue being great, generous and grand.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
You have been doubted, hated, talked about, made fun of, hurt, lied to, lied on, broken and at your wits end. With that being said, I commend you for the fact that you are still standing. Your courage speaks volumes! I know your struggle and the pain you’ve endured. You are more than a conqueror. I am proud to say that your heart belongs to me. Nothing can keep you down and no one can steal your joy. All of your storms have ended up blessing the sky with rainbows. Don’t give up, continue to stand tall and love yourself first.
You are appreciated,
Self
There is no love without respect.
There isn’t much truth if spoken without genuine honesty. People are sometimes unaware that certain things go hand in hand. If you’re going to talk about it, be about it. Try not to be selective in your actions. Be who you say you are. It’s important that we learn, teach and allow our mind, body and spirit to work together with one another.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
Sometimes we have to learn to love when all odds are against us. Have a discerning heart, open mind and forgiving spirit. The beautiful thing about growth is the ability to see our changes. Embrace your seasons and watch them evolve in ways you couldn’t imagine.
Peace,
Self
Dear Self,
When you live in love and light you will not go unseen. Ignite the world with every flame of your being.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
Thank you for learning not to fear the lightning that may cause a disturbance in your life. Your failures, mistakes, lessons and turbulence have made your journey that much brighter and worthwhile.
Love always,
Self
Perfection isn’t welcomed here; I’d like to see your flaws.
The blueprint of your beauty makes me want to love them all…
#anote2self
Dear Self,
You are a Queen, so even when they push you, don’t take your crown off.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
There is so much more to this life than just “this life.” Venture out and experience the beauty in living…
Beautifully yours,
Self
Dear Self,
Keep in mind that the reason you know you can be good to others is only because you’ve taken strides to be better for and to yourself.
Gratefully yours,
Self
Some Timing
Sometimes I don’t think I am pretty but
some days I smile when I pass the mirror.
Sometimes I don’t feel worthy but
then I look at my reflection and see my daughter, mother and grandmother who are worthy of all things. That in itself says a lot about me.
Some days I don’t want anything to do with anyone but
then I remember who’s been there for me when I’ve had no one.
Sometimes life sucks. Other times not so much.
I’ve come to the conclusion that I need balance in my life so
these “sometimey” feelings are welcomed to stay.
If everything was all good all of the time I would be miserable. And if everything was all bad I’d feel the same.
My ups and downs are reminiscent of yin and yang; they need each other to help me get through the good and bad days.
#anote2self
Loving Self,
No matter how bad you want a person, if your hearts are in two different places, you’ll have to pass and move on.
Love,
Self
Generous Self,
Yes, you are giving but do not give people the power to steal your peace. It belongs to you and no one should be able to run away with it.
Love,
Self
Hesitant Self,
Love your neighbor even the ones who do not show you the same courtesy. You can’t expect to receive love if you’re selective and not really willing to give it. What you put into the world you will indeed get back. Even if it’s not from the person you’re expecting it to be.
Love,
Self
I am a strong believer that enabling/putting up with mistreatment dictates how we may feel about ourselves. You have to ask yourself, “What am I missing and/or seeking?” You may love and want someone but who do you want and love more, them or yourself? Letting go is sometimes essential in growing up. Learn to truly love yourself first. Once that happens there will be no question about what’s for you and what’s not.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
There’s a blessing in every breath you take. Even when it’s hard to breathe you have yet to suffocate. I commend you for your endurance even when the air is thick—keep breathing, keep loving, keep going.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
When you are truly stunning, gorgeous and beautiful, you won’t have to prove that to anyone visually.
Love,
Self
Dear Self,
When you really love someone your heart might always beat for them. Just because that is true it doesn’t mean that they will always dance for you. Keep in mind that you don’t have to stop the rhythm just adjust the pace.
Love,
Self
Love yourself first. Buy your own flowers. Tell yourself how beautiful you are. Don’t expect anyone to love you more than you do. When you meet a partner you shouldn’t have expectations of flattery. The beautiful words and things will mean very little when you’re already showering yourself with them first. Expectations can taint love when you’re seeking to fill a void.
#anote2self
Dear Self,
Your king is coming. Please continue to be patient. You’ve kissed some frogs and you’ve learned some lessons. Now it’s time to prepare yourself and Queendom for the ONE who is worthy. I know you get lonely and worried but fear not, your love is being prepared carefully and especially for you.
Love,
Self
You will get what you genuinely bring to the table in a partnership. Bring love and communication to your table. Bring humility to your table along with honesty and trust. Use respect as your table cloth. That’s the perfect table setting and if your partner can cook, well, there ya go! Often times we are what we attract and if you don’t want messiness keep a clean house.
Love,
Self
#anote2self
Dear Self,
Words from a Wanderer (Notes and Love Poems) Page 1
