I laughed. At first, I tried to hide it, but the more I tried to stop, the harder I laughed, until I finally had to sit down at my kitchen table, my face buried in my arms and my shoulders shaking. When I was finally able to breath without dissolving into giggles, I saw Caroline standing in the doorway with a deeply concerned expression on her pale face.
“Is everything all right?” she asked.
“Oh, fuck,” I said, wiping my eyes on the sleeves of my pajama top. “It’s just...It’s my ex-husband. He would love this.”
For once Caroline looked completely lost. I stood and took the glasses from her hands, putting them in the dishwasher.
“Barry Richardson,” I said. “My ex. He’s a professor at Northwestern. He studies medieval literature. And he just—” I had to stop as my words dissolved into a fit of giggles. “He just loves dragons. I mean, he had a fucking dragon tapestry in his office. He probably still does.”
“Oh,” she said. “That’s... funny?”
I snorted another laugh and grabbed a few coffee cups from the cabinet. “It is funny,” I said. “Can I get you some coffee?”
I filled a mug and turned to her. A bolt of panic shot through my chest. Caroline was hunched over against the counter, her hand pressed to her side and her face contorted in pain.
“You okay?”
“Yeah. Yeah, fine.” Her back straightened and she exhaled sharply. “It’s just, uh...” She waved her hand, looking around the kitchen.
“Braxton-Hicks?” I asked.
“That’s right. Just false contractions.” She smiled, but her voice wavered.
I glanced toward the living room. Loki was still sitting on the couch, staring out the darkened windows.
“Listen,” I whispered, “I don’t mean to be insulting, but is there a reason you need to be here? Because the park, right now... it might not be the best place for someone who’s about to have a baby.”
She shook her head. “Vali won’t talk to Loki. But he talked to me. Once. Besides, I’m not due for another—” She gasped and bent over again, hand pressed against her side.
“How far apart are they?” I whispered.
She shook her head. “They’re not... contractions. They’re not consistent.” She stood back up and turned toward the living room, her eyes softening as she stared at Loki. “Do you know how long he’s been looking for Vali?”
“I don’t even want to know,” I said, and I handed her a cup of coffee.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
We were out of my house, coffee in hand, by four in the morning.
As I locked the front door, I had a sudden, irrational urge to call someone and tell them where I was going and what I was doing. I couldn’t tell John, of course. I’d lose my job if the other Natural Science professors at Montana State heard I was looking for a dragon in Yellowstone. And Susan would think I’d lost my mind.
Strangely enough, the one person in the entire world I actually wanted to call was Barry fucking Richardson. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and stared at it as my breath escaped my lips in billowing white clouds. I hadn’t talked to Barry since we’d finalized the sale of the condo in Florida. What time was it in Chicago? Almost five in the morning? He’d be awake, I bet. He’d be at his desk, hunched over his computer.
Would he answer the phone?
“Is there a problem?” Loki asked.
I shook my head and shoved my phone back in my pocket. “Sorry. No problem.”
WE WERE THE ONLY CAR on the highway.
The moon set over the horizon as we left Bozeman, and the winking stars felt very close, almost pressing down against the windshield of my Subaru. Loki and Caroline sat together in the backseat, and the driver’s seat felt like its own little world as my Subaru crested the pass through the Gallatin mountains and began to drop into Paradise Valley. I remembered Vali, and the way the wind lifted his hair off his neck. He’d looked so strong and proud the last time I saw him. The familiar slow heat of arousal spread through my body.
“Don’t,” Loki growled from the backseat.
“Excuse me?” I said.
“Don’t think about it,” he said. “We don’t want to draw its attention.”
“Oh, come on! How the hell would you know what I’m thinking?” I checked my rearview mirror, but it was too dark to make out Loki’s expression.
“I don’t, of course,” he said. “But I can smell you.”
“Smell...?” My voice trailed off as his words registered. I shifted, suddenly painfully aware of my damp underwear.
“Unless you were thinking about someone else when you got so turned on?”
“Loki!” Caroline hissed.
“And if you’re thinking of Vali, you’d also be thinking of Níðhöggr, no?” Loki murmured. I didn’t need to see him to know he was smiling.
A cold knot of fear settled low in my stomach. “Fine,” I muttered. “I won’t.”
“I cannot read thoughts, but Níðhöggr can,” Loki said. “And it would be best not to warn it of our approach.”
I tried to bring my mind back to Vali, to his strong body and easy smile. Not to the monster who might be waiting for us in the wilderness, just past the black, yawning maw of that cave.
And I was thinking about the dragon again.
I smacked my steering wheel in frustration. “Damn it, you can’t say, ‘Don’t think of something!’ Then it’s all I can think about! It’s like telling someone not to think of an elephant. Boom! Now everyone’s thinking of a fucking elephant!”
Caroline laughed from the backseat.
“Talk about something,” I said. “Please. Let’s talk about something that’s not batshit crazy.”
“Fine,” Loki said. “What would you like to talk about?”
“I don’t know!” I snapped.
“Do you want to hear how I met my wife?” he asked.
“Oh, don’t you dare,” Caroline said.
“No!” I said. “No, God, no. Just tell me something, I don’t know. Something happy.”
Loki sighed. And then he told a story. I tried to remember it, even as he was telling it and the miles spooled away beneath my tires and the stars shivered above my dashboard. It was a story about elves and dwarves, wickedness and heroism, sacrifice and love. But even then, even as I drove my Subaru through the sweeping vastness of Paradise Valley, between the great mountain ranges, I couldn’t quite grasp it. Somehow I knew, even then, that parts of the story would come back to me, over and over, for my entire life. Sometimes even now, when I’m falling asleep or just upon awakening, I swear I’ve remembered it. But then I blink, and the story vanishes again.
By the time Loki fell silent, we’d been traveling through Yellowstone National Park for over an hour. The sky was an opalescent gray above the Absaroka mountains, and only a handful of stars remained in the indigo sky to dance above us. Thick silence rippled from the backseat, filling the car.
“Is that the end of the story?” I asked, finally.
Loki laughed. I realized I could just make out his reflection in my rearview mirror. “Of course not,” he said. “No story ends. Now pull over just up here.”
My tires crunched over the snow as I slowed and turned off the road.
“Hey, I remember this place. This is where I picked you up in November,” I said.
I turned to the back seat. Loki gave me a distracted smile. Caroline’s eyes were closed, and her pale, furrowed brow gleamed with sweat.
“You go ahead,” she said, leaning her forehead against the door frame.
I shrugged and opened my door, bracing myself against the cold. The snow underfoot squealed in protest as I followed Loki to the edge of the highway. We’d parked in front of a low sagebrush-dotted rise. Loki took off, climbing the slope despite the knee-deep snowdrifts. I was panting by the time I caught up with him, and the cuffs of my jeans were frozen.
He stood at the top of the rise, his arms outstretched, his palms up. The clouds above us were streaked with p
ink; the cold air tore at my throat.
“It’s too far,” he muttered. “We’ll never make it on foot.”
“What’s too far?”
Loki turned to me, narrowing his odd, pale eyes. “Can you sense it?”
I tried to ignore the cold and remember the last time I’d seen Vali. Can’t you feel it? Vali had asked me. I closed my eyes, reaching for that feeling, that sense of something gone wrong.
Yes, there it was. The frozen air held an angry, burnt scent. It was the same acrid smell that had drifted from the looming darkness of the cave in my dreams.
“There,” I said, opening my eyes and pointing into the gloaming. “What direction is that? South, south-west?”
Loki nodded. “Very good. I was right about you. But it’s miles away, and I can’t travel with these damn wards—”
He froze and turned back to the road. Then he ran down the hill, vanishing faster than I would have thought possible. By the time I made it halfway down the hill, he was already at my car. Caroline leaned against the roof with Loki at her side. As I crunched through the snowdrifts on my frozen feet, I heard Caroline’s wavering voice. Counting. My stomach lurched, and my legs felt painfully heavy.
Caroline looked up as I approached. Her eyes seemed very large in her pale face. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I think...I think my water broke.”
My chest tightened. I remembered that fear. Before the pain, before my contractions felt like anything more serious than a runner’s cramp, there was a cold, hard fear. And the struggle to keep fear from turning to sheer panic.
“Hey, it’s okay,” I said, putting my arm around her shoulders. She felt very small under my huge down jacket. “You’re going to be just fine. I can help.”
She took a deep breath. “They’re still a few minutes apart.”
“Great,” I said. “Let’s get in the car.”
Loki helped her to the backseat and closed the door gently. Then he turned to me, his pale eyes wide.
“We’re at least three hours from the nearest hospital,” I whispered. “Can’t you whoosh her away?”
“No, I cannot,” he snapped. “These are the most powerful wards I’ve encountered.”
“She can’t have a baby in Yellowstone, Loki!” I hissed, squeezing my fingers into a fist.
“Damn it.” Loki shook his head. “Take us to Artemis. Please.”
“What?”
“Oh, whatever you call her. The moon. The huntress. The one in charge of childbirth.”
“Diana?”
Loki nodded and I climbed in the car, trying not to listen to Caroline’s low, animal whimpers.
“Just hang in there,” I said as the engine revved to life. “We’re not far.”
My knuckles blazed white on the steering wheel as we climbed into the jagged Absaroka mountains. Away from the hospital.
“Fuck,” I muttered under my breath. “I hope you know what you’re doing, Loki.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
The sun crested over the snow-capped mountains just as we pulled into Diana’s driveway. Loki opened the backseat door before I’d even slammed my Subaru into park, and he was on Diana’s doorstep before I could unbuckle my seatbelt.
Diana’s front door opened slowly, spilling golden light into the cold, early morning air. She looked enormous and unforgiving in the doorway, with her arms crossed over her formidable chest. I couldn’t believe I’d ever mistaken her for human.
Loki fell to his knees on the hard-packed snow. “Artemis,” he said, his voice jagged. “Help my wife.”
The car door opened behind me and Caroline stepped out, resting heavily against the roof of the Subaru. None of us moved or spoke. Diana’s eyes traveled over me to Caroline, hunched and panting behind me, and finally came back to Loki, kneeling in the snow.
“Please,” Loki said. The word sounded like it had been ripped from his lips.
Diana’s expression grew even colder. “If I do this, you will be in my debt,” she said.
“Of course,” Loki said, through gritted teeth.
Diana stepped around him to Caroline, extending her arm. The barest hint of a smile flickered across her lips, although I couldn’t tell if it was welcoming or victorious. “My dear,” Diana said, “please come inside.”
Caroline hesitated. Her eyes darted to Loki. When he nodded, she took Diana’s arm. Together they walked toward the cabin. Loki stood and stepped out of their way, but Caroline stopped in front of him.
“My husband comes too,” she said.
Diana shook her head. “That’s ridiculous.”
Caroline dropped Diana’s arm and reached for Loki. Their hands locked together. “Then I don’t want your help,” she said.
There was another long silence, broken only when Caroline gasped and doubled over, grabbing her side. Loki wrapped his arm around her waist. His fire-red hair rippled as a gust of wind shook a glittering cascade of ice crystals from the pines.
Diana spat a long stream of thick, greasy words that could only have been curses before shaking her head and opening her front door. “Fine,” she hissed. “Come in.”
Loki and Caroline walked in together, arm in arm.
Diana turned to me. “You too,” she yelled. “I’m going to need all the help I can get.”
Trying to ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, I followed Loki into Diana’s cabin.
“Karen, to the kitchen,” Diana barked when I walked through her front door. “There’s food, water, juice. Bring it all.”
I nodded and turned down the hallway. Diana’s fridge was disturbingly well-stocked, especially for someone who lived two hours away from the nearest grocery store. I filled a few plates with cheese, crackers, and grapes, poured glasses of water and juice, and arranged them all on a gleaming silver tray I found leaning against Diana’s coffee maker.
An enormous fire roared on the hearth when I entered the living room. The huge glass-eyed taxidermied animals stood sentinel as Caroline and Loki embraced by the fire, their bodies rocking together. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders and his hands pressed into the small of her back. I had to turn away.
I stood like that with Barry. With that thought I was back in Chicago, back in the sterile hospital room, surrounded by the beep and glow of machinery, holding my husband and trying to breathe as the birthing contractions ripped my body apart.
“Thank you, Karen,” Diana said, taking the tray from my hands.
I shook my head to clear the memories. “No problem. Anything else I can do?”
Diana glanced at Caroline and Loki. They could almost be lovers, slow dancing in the middle of Diana’s living room. “Stay close,” she said. “The baby’s coming fast.”
I leaned against the doorway and felt rather useless as Diana held a glass of orange juice to Caroline’s lips. Caroline drank it in hesitant little sips, then collapsed against Loki, her eyes closed and her head resting on his chest.
Diana knelt in front of them, closing her eyes and running her hands over Caroline’s stomach. She nodded, stood, and whispered something to Loki. A moment later Caroline’s back stiffened and she moaned, burying her face in Loki’s chest.
“Breathe,” Diana said. “Try to relax.” Then she turned to Loki. “Get her out of her clothes. I’ll bring a robe.”
Caroline whimpered, and Diana walked back to me. “Get the towels,” Diana whispered. “Down the hallway. Second door on the left.”
“Yeah, sure. How many?”
“All of them!” Diana snapped.
I stumbled into the hallway. It felt absurdly good to be away from the heat of the fireplace, so I leaned against the wall and took a few deep breaths, trying to process this crazy morning. When I felt slightly closer to normal, I looked for the second door on the left. It turned out to be a linen closet smelling vaguely of cedar and stacked with a rainbow of towels. I grabbed as many as I could carry and around.
Then I heard the first scream.
When I got back
to the living room, Caroline was on her hands and knees on the polished wood floor, a long, dark robe draped over her back. Loki knelt next to her, their faces so close they could be kissing. Diana was rubbing her back. I suddenly felt embarrassed. I was trespassing, after all; I hardly knew these people. I had no right to be here—
“Towels!” Diana barked.
I jumped to obey, dumping my armful of towels next to Diana. The air in the living room now carried the iron tang of blood mixed with wood smoke from the fire, the heavy scent of sweat, and the thick, animal smell of amniotic fluid.
“Here,” Diana grabbed my wrist and pulled me to my knees. “You. Rub her back. Right here.”
She guided my hand to the base of Caroline’s spine and pushed. I followed her lead, digging my knuckles into the soft fabric of the robe and pushing on the knotted muscles beneath. Caroline’s body was shivering in long, slow waves.
Diana rocked back on her heels and reached between Caroline’s legs. “The baby’s posterior,” she said, “but she’ll flip around. In the meantime, it’s going to be... uncomfortable.”
Caroline whimpered again, almost a sob. Loki leaned close to her, their cheeks pressed together, and whispered soft and low in her ear.
“This wasn’t...the plan,” Caroline panted. “I wanted...painkillers. All the painkillers.”
Despite myself, I laughed out loud. Even Diana smiled.
“You’re going to be okay,” I said, pressing my hands into the hard muscles of her lower back. And, for the first time since I saw Caroline doubled over against my kitchen counter at two this morning, I actually believed it.
“I’m repositioning the baby,” Diana said. “It’s going to feel a little strange.”
Caroline nodded, her long, dark hair sticking to her forehead. Diana moved her strong hands quickly over Caroline’s stomach and between her legs, pressing in ways that were uncomfortable to even watch. Caroline winced but didn’t cry out. Once Diana declared the baby properly positioned, she told Caroline to stand up and walk.
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