“Everything’s fine,” I replied. “I think I just got too much sun today.”
She nodded her head slowly. “Well, why don’t you go to bed early then? I’ll come check on you before I head off myself.”
Taking her up on that suggestion, I thanked her for dinner and quickly retreated to my bedroom. Falling face first into my mattress, I let out a huge breath that I was sure I’d been holding in all day. Flopping onto my back, I stared up at the ceiling, wondering what the hell I’d gotten myself into.
I didn’t know what was up with Gage, but something was definitely wrong. After this afternoon, I figured things would be – I don’t know …different. I thought he’d be more affectionate …or something. Obviously I knew nothing about boys. Here I’d thought that what was happening between us was special, but instead he’d avoided me like the plague.
I’d barely even caught a glimpse of him and then the next thing I knew he’d left for the day. Just like that. No goodbyes. No kisses. No – nothing. He’d just left. It felt wrong. I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d done something. Did he not enjoy being with me? That’s not the way it had seemed at the pond, or on the way back to the farm. The entire drive he’d held my hand, constantly bringing it up to his lips to drop kisses along my knuckles, or turning my hand to kiss the inside of my wrist.
Was he mad because I hadn’t done anything for him in return? He’d insisted he didn’t need me to though, when I’d asked after he’d finally helped me put my bikini bottoms back on. Had he been lying? Was I supposed to do something anyway? And now he was out with his brother. Maybe he didn’t want me to do anything to him because now he knew I was a virgin and assumed I didn’t know what I was doing.
God, what if he’d gone out tonight to be with a girl who actually had experience? That was it, wasn’t it? My hand reached up to dash away the stupid tear that trickled from the corner of my eye. There’s no crying in baseball, I reminded myself. If Gage had decided he needed someone else to please him then fine. It’s not like we had agreed to some exclusive relationship. Or any relationship for that matter. What had I really expected from someone like Gage? I’d known way before coming back here what he was like. Jaiden had kept me well informed over the years, so why was I surprised? I was just another girl to him, despite how he’d made it seem.
Another tear snuck loose. Stupid tear. I swallowed past the lump in my throat. He’d said we’d do something tomorrow night, but it was probably better that I cancel that as soon as I saw him in the morning. Despite what had happened this afternoon, I needed to tell him we had to go back to just being friends, and then keep my distance. At least if we were just friends I wouldn’t feel this way. I’d protected my heart from this guy my entire life, there was no way I was going to let him crush it now.
My eyes snapped open. It took a moment for them to grow accustom to the darkness shrouding my bedroom. Turning my head, I looked at the clock on the bedside table to see a three and two zeros lit up. Three in the morning? Ugh. Why was I awake?
Tap, tap, tap.
“What the?” I sat up, realizing something must have woken me. Pulling back the covers, I walked over to the window, pulling back the thin white curtains to peek down at the ground outside. A shadowy figure stood there, their face hidden by the maple that stood beside the house. Someone was throwing rocks at my window? As if to answer my question, three small pebbles hit the pane again in quick succession.
Who in the world would stand outside my window throwing rocks? Only one name came to mind, but I couldn’t believe it was actually him. Pulling the curtains back the rest of the way, I went to lift the windowpane, cringing as the old thing squeaked loudly in the silence of the house. Damn old farm houses.
I stopped, listening to see I’d woken Nan. All seemed the same, so I continued to lift it, every inch seeming to reverberate around the room. I gave up with it halfway, bending so my head could stick out in the cooler night air.
“Who’s there?” I called out in a weird sort of yell slash whisper.
“How many people would show up at your window at three in the morning?” Gage’s voice asked, carrying up to me.
“I wouldn’t think any,” I replied, “and yet here you are. What are you doing?”
He paused. “Can I come up, or do you want to come down?”
I had no idea what was going on, but a large part of me, the part that knew I couldn’t suffer any more heartache from this boy, told me to tell him to get lost. Of course, the other part was already jumping at the fact he was here and wanted to see me. Unless he was here to tell me that whatever we’d started was over. The possibility hurt, and only gave more weight to my “get lost” side.
I sighed loudly. “You can come up,” I said finally. “I’ll come down and unlock the door.”
“Don’t bother,” he said. I was about to ask why until I saw what he was doing. My mouth snapped shut as Gage started to climb the maple beside the house as easily as though he were some sort of animal. In no time at all he sat on a large branch across from me.
“Now what, genius?” I asked, eyeing the space between the tree and the window. If he fell, he’d break something for sure. The ground was a long way down from this vantage point.
“Step back,” he ordered.
I pulled my head back in, stepping away from the window. I heard the branch creak loudly before something hit the side of the wall and two hands appeared over the sill of the window. My hand slapped over my mouth so I wouldn’t involuntarily scream. The boy was nuts, clearly. What on earth made him think this was a good idea? Was he drunk? That could explain it, I reasoned.
Gage grunted as he pulled himself through the window, falling somewhat soundlessly on my bedroom floor. I eyed my door, listening to the rest of the house, but all still seemed quiet. When I turned back, Gage was standing just inside my room, brushing off the front of his pants.
“Please tell me you’re drunk,” I whispered.
He chuckled. “Drunk?” he said as if the idea were preposterous. “I haven’t even had one alcoholic drink tonight. Why would you think that?”
I shrugged. “Why else would you just attempt to kill yourself outside my window?”
I couldn’t see him clearly, but I would swear I could sense him rolling his eyes at me.
“Please, Ella. I’ve been climbing trees since I could walk. That was nothing.”
I suddenly felt really sorry for Ms. Hunter for having to raise the three Hunter boys. I folded my arms across my chest, keeping my distance. I had a feeling if Gage were to put his hands on me now, all my earlier resolve to go back to being friends would evaporate in an instance.
“What are you doing here, Gage?”
He looked slightly confused by my question, which pissed me off. He was the one who’d decided to go out tonight and ignore me all afternoon. Who did he think he was to act that way, and then show up in the middle of the night?
He seemed to be watching me in the dark, making me shift nervously from foot to foot as I waited for whatever lame explanation he was thinking up. I knew how guys worked. After what felt like forever he let out a loud sigh, before sitting back on the windowsill, rubbing a tired hand down his face.
“I’m sorry, Ella,” he said.
“For what?” I bit the inside of my cheek to keep away the unwanted tears already forming at those words. I didn’t want to care. I didn’t want to feel as hurt as I did, even though I didn’t know what he’d done or how much it was going to kill me. Had he been with another woman tonight? Was he having second thoughts about what had happened between us? I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear the answer to my question but it was already out there.
“For how I acted this afternoon,” he answered. “I know how it must have seemed, and I truly am sorry about that. It had nothing to do with you. I was just dealing with something and my head got all distracted. I was in a foul mood and didn’t want to take it out on you.”
That was it? It’s not you, it’s me? Was he ser
ious?
“And what about tonight?” I said, the tightness in my throat almost suffocating.
“What about tonight?” he asked, confused.
I didn’t know how to answer that. Was I supposed to outright accuse him of not wanting to do something with me so he could go out and get a more experienced woman? How lame would that sound? The last thing I needed was for him to pity me, knowing that I realized what he’d been up to. I mean, he was a Hunter. Obviously he needed to be satisfied.
Gage slowly stood up, walking toward me. His hands reached out to land gently on my shoulders. I wanted to back away, I really did, but my feet were suddenly frozen in place.
“Ells? What about tonight? What are you talking about?”
I couldn’t look him in the eyes so I just stared at his chest. “You can just be upfront with me, Gage. You don’t need to lie to spare my feelings.”
He scoffed. “Ella, I don’t know what you’re talking about, but something tells me you have things all mixed up in that pretty head of yours.”
Giving in, I looked up to meet his stare. “I know I’m not experienced, Gage. I get that guys like you need that from a woman. We don’t need to pretend like this is going to work between us. Being friends has always worked for us in the past.”
His mouth literally dropped open. He resembled a fish as he opened and shut it a couple of times, no words actually making it out. He seemed more shocked than I had expected.
“You think I went out and messed around with another girl because you’re inexperienced? Jesus, Ella.” He let go of me, spinning around to face the window as though he couldn’t stand to look at me. When he finally did turn back, I could see the hurt and insult in his eyes. “Is that how you really think of me? You honestly believe I would treat you that way? Of all people?”
I shrugged, suddenly feeling unsure.
“I was working, Ella. I work the night shifts most nights down at the box factory with Cam. I told you, I’m trying to save up enough money to go to college. I wasn’t out with another woman. I haven’t been with anyone since before the summer started. How could I when all I see, and all I think about, is you? You’ve got me in the palm of your hand and you don’t even know it.”
Well then. That was certainly not what I’d been expecting. My heart raced loudly, the blood pounding in my ears as I watched him step closer to me again. His hand cupped the side of my face as he stared pleadingly into my eyes.
“Ella, you have to know I would never intentionally hurt you. I’ve spent what feels like my entire life protecting you, do you honestly think I would even let myself cause you pain? I’d rather stab myself than do something to make you unhappy.”
I cleared the emotion from my throat. “I just thought …” Ugh, I didn’t know how to explain it. What did I think? Did I honestly have so little self confidence that I had instantly jumped to the worst conclusions? Obviously. Now I just felt stupid and immature. “I didn’t know what to think,” I admitted. “You avoided me all day and then went out with Cam …I just figured …”
He was shaking his head, already refusing to listen to my excuse. His other hand wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer so that our bodies lined up perfectly. The heat from him was already clouding my mind as I stared up into eyes that were as familiar to me as my own.
“If I have you Ella Page, I don’t need anyone else.”
His mouth came down to meet mine. The kiss started off sweet, but soon our hands were everywhere as we kissed each other as though we hadn’t seen each other in years instead of hours. Gage reached down to cup my thighs, lifting me easily into his arms as I wrapped my legs around his waist. Walking us to the bed, he lay me down gently, never once taking his lips from mine.
My fingers dove beneath the fabric of his shirt to feel the smooth, hard edges of his abs. Pulling back, Gage made quick work of removing both our shirts before crushing our bodies together again. I gasped into his kiss as our bare skin met. One of his hands stroked up my side to my bare breast, palming it gently in a way that had me moaning softly.
“Shhh,” he whispered. “We don’t want to wake up Nan.”
It was a serious warning, but I could hear the mischief in his voice as he squeezed harder, sending a bolt of need right to my core. I bit my lip to keep from calling out as his head bent forward to kiss and suck on the neglected breast. He alternated between the two until I could hardly keep my hips still. His hardness rubbed against me and I knew he was just as worked up as I was.
My hands went to the button of his jeans without hesitation, eagerly trying to get them off. Gage stopped his ministrations to my chest to prop himself up on his elbows. He stared down at me, his eyes burning with desire. And yet, I could see him fighting to control it.
“We don’t have to do this right now, Ella,” he said, leaning down to kiss me softly on the lips. “There’s no rush.”
I knew that. I’d been waiting years to be in a situation with a boy where it felt “right”. This wasn’t something I took lightly by any means. But being with Gage could never feel wrong, and right now my body was practically screaming for me to take that final step with him. I looked into his eyes, praying he’d see the truth in my eyes and not fight me on it. I didn’t want him to think I felt forced into anything or that I’d have any regrets in the morning, because I knew there was no way I would.
“I want you,” I said, emphasizing each word slowly.
He groaned deeply in his throat before crashing our mouths together in a hot, punishing kiss. Just his mouth on mine had me going crazy. When he pulled away I whimpered, reaching for him. He chuckled, standing up beside the bed to rid himself of his jeans, and then pulling down my sleep shorts and panties in one quick swoop. I watched as he reached into his back pocket to grab his wallet, and pulled out a condom. He quickly put it on before joining me back on the bed.
“I’ll make this good for you, Ella,” he said, running his nose along the column of my neck. “I promise.”
I arched my neck, giving him more room as he kissed his way back to my mouth. He didn’t need to make me any promises. He was already better than any guy could be because it was him. I should have known all along that no one would ever compare to being with Gage.
Twenty-Four
Gage
This was not why I had come here, but damn if I’d be able to stop it now. Having Ella warm and soft beneath me, her little gasps in my ears, the rapid beat of her pulse beneath my lips as I kissed her neck – was making thinking clearly extremely difficult. She was everything I’d ever dreamed about. Every fantasy come to life as I peered down into her eyes, heavy lidded with desire. Her mouth, even in the dark, looked swollen and red from our kisses. I wanted to brand her in every way as mine.
She arched her back, pressing our chests closer, making me lose my thoughts once more as I took her mouth with mine. Our tongues met, our lips melded together as though we’d been made specifically for each other. Kissing Ella was almost enough to keep me satisfied alone. Almost. Her tiny body was practically begging me to bring her pleasure, and I wasn’t going to ignore it.
Separating our mouths, I started to trail down her body. This was her first time, so there was no way I was just going to get right to the main show. I’d have to ready her first. Plus, I was dying to see her fall apart again and again. I reached the apex of her thighs and started to kiss her without missing a beat. Her surprised gasp filled the quiet house as one hand gripped the sheets, the other pulling at my hair. I groaned against her, lifting up enough just to speak softly.
“You gotta keep quiet, Ells,” I warned, smiling at the crazed look in her eyes. She was already so close, I could tell. Those heated blue eyes watched me from beneath her lashes as her chest rose and fell rapidly. “We don’t want Nan coming in here.”
I didn’t wait for a reply, lowering to continue my assault as she squirmed and moaned beneath me. The hand holding my head disappeared. I looked up to see her cover her mouth with it as she fell apart
, her body shaking and trembling beneath me. I kissed the inside of her thigh before crawling back up her body, holding myself over her as she came back down.
Her eyes were closed, her teeth digging into her lips. She was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. When they finally opened and focused on me, I knew I was done for – permanently. There would never be another girl out there that affected me the way Ella Page did. I was officially hooked – line and sinker. The sudden need to say those three little words to her overcame me so unexpectedly I had to literally bite my tongue not to say them out loud. It was too soon for that, even though I knew deep down it was true.
I leaned down and kissed her again, this time slower and gentler. It was my way of telling her what I couldn’t say quite yet. Without breaking away, I positioned my hips at her entrance and pushed forward. Ella stiffened beneath me, her breath catching. We broke apart, and I paused, letting her adjust even though I was only partially in.
“Just relax,” I told her, kissing her eyelids and nose. She nodded against me. Pushing forward more, I couldn’t stop the moan that escaped me at the feel of her. It was almost too much to bear. Taking a deep breath, I pushed the rest of the way and stopped again at her hiss. I knew it was going to hurt, I just prayed it would still be good for her once she adjusted to it.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yes,” she whispered. “Just give me a minute.”
A minute might kill me, but I’d do it for her. I’d do anything Ella needed of me. Finally, after what felt like eternity, but could have really only been a moment, I felt her move her hips beneath me, taking me even further. I soft moan came from her, making keeping still even harder.
“I’m good now,” she said, moving against me again.
“Thank God,” I said as I began to move.
Simple Beginnings Page 16
