by Simone Elise
She shoved my shoulder. “Don’t fucking pretend that you didn’t know.”
“Are we going to do this again?” Didn’t we fight about this enough? I broke her heart. I know. The guilt I felt never went away, but it was nothing compared to the regret.
She shook her head. “No, we aren’t because you see, Reaper, this weekend isn’t about us. There is no us. I’ll try my hardest to stay out of your way, and you stay the fuck out of mine, ok?”
Abby usually had a soft edge to her. But right then, the fire-filled woman standing in front of me had no soft edge. Abby’s eyes were harsh, hard, and determined, and it turned me the fuck on. God, this was wrong.
“Fine. I’ll stay out of your way.” I side-stepped, freeing her path. “Fuck off, then.”
Her lips formed a tight line. Her expression told me she had more to yell at me about. She loved fighting with me; she just didn’t know it.
Finally, she let out a groan and pushed herself off the wall, shouldering me aside as she walked past. This weekend was meant to be about me regaining my brother’s trust, but somehow I knew it was going to be all about her. Everything always turned out to be about her.
I turned, catching a glimpse of her blonde hair before she turned the corner.
The only way I was going to get out of this circle was by distracting myself. That meant I needed to get my hands dirty. I needed to get in deep with the club. It was the only way I wouldn’t have a moment to think about the blonde ruining my life.
Chapter 27
Abby
I couldn’t understand love. To be honest, it completely threw me. I guess that was fair considering my upbringing. The only version of love I had ever seen was Dad keeping the same club whore in his bed longer than a week.
I wished I could remember Mom and Dad together. Maybe then I could understand love better or at the very least know what it looks like.
My stomach clenched as I continued to watch Reaper and the female. Kim had offered twice to shoulder the bitch, but I told her I was taking the higher ground. I wasn’t going to let Reaper and his brunette get the better of me. Even if he had his arm wrapped around her and kept giving her that smile that once used to knock the air from my lungs.
“Why a brunette?” I yelled in Kim’s ear over the music.
Kim’s eyes traveled back to the pair. “You really want to know?” she yelled back in my ear.
I nodded my head. If she had any insight, I wanted it.
“To piss you off.” She smiled broadly. “Clearly.”
Well, if his mission was to piss me off, he was definitely doing a good job of it. My stomach was so twisted up it wouldn’t even hold my liquor.
“Have you seen Dad yet?”
Kim shook her head, “Nope. I still can’t believe he isn’t around. Is Dad bailing on his own charter party? Typical.” Her eyes wandered around the party while she took a long sip of her beer.
“I’m going to take a walk.” I sighed. My eyes drifted over to Reaper again. I really needed to put some distance between us.
“I’ll join you.”
“Nah, don’t be silly. Stay, keep an eye on your man.” I wasn’t stupid. I saw the way she kept looking in Trigger’s direction.
“Righteo then, don’t be too long.”
I gave her a quick nod and began to weave through the crowd. Being back here was harder than I expected. Not because of Reaper, but because it felt like I was home. As wrong as it sounded, I hated admitting that this place still felt like home.
The noise of the party softened as I stepped into the clubhouse, the door spinning shut behind me.
“You lost, sweetheart?”
I spun on my heels, trying to see through the darkness. I made out a bulky shadow at the bar.
“Drinking with the lights off? That isn’t normal, you know,” I spoke while moving closer towards him.
He grunted out a bark of laughter. “Keeps the drunks away.”
“The sign on the door saying ‘Do Not Enter’ doesn’t do that for you?”
“Most bikers can’t read.”
“Most bikers aren’t moths, either.” I pulled out a stool and sat down in front of him. “Who are you?” I dropped my head to the side and studying his barely visible features. “I don’t remember you.”
“When a girl doesn’t remember her own father, you know the relationship isn’t a good one.” Dad placed his glass down. “Didn’t expect to see you here, Abby.”
My mouth dropped open, “Dad?”
“Don’t be too surprised, darling; you are in my bar.”
I inched closer, narrowing my eyes to get a better look at him. “I didn’t recognize you.”
“Blame it on the lack of lights.”
Guilt flooded through me. “Yeah, I suppose I could blame it on that.” It was easier to blame it on the light than the real reason. “Sorry about... well, you know... last time.” I chewed on my lip. “How I acted wasn’t acceptable.”
“Nothing you girls ever did was acceptable. Thanks for the apology, sweetheart.”
“Why are you hiding in here?” When there was a party in full swing outside, the version of my dad that I knew wouldn’t be hiding in a dark bar.
His eyes dropped to the shot glass in front of him. “Doesn’t matter. Why are you here, sweetheart?” He threw back his shot and then poured another. “Kim here too?”
“Yeah, she is.”
“Why?”
Well, Dad, you see, Kim has a hard crush on Trigger, and she convinced me to drag her down here. “No real reason. Just wanted to come home.”
The corner of his lips twitched. “Never were a good liar, Abby.”
He had a point. “Whatever you say, Dad.”
“Get sick of the party, darlin’?” His face soured from the bit of the shot he just swallowed. “Or are you looking for someone?”
“I just needed to get some fresh air.”
“From inside?”
I wasn’t enjoying the way he made all my actions sound stupid. “I guess.” I rolled my eyes. “Why are you hiding in here, Dad?”
His face hardened. “Trying to come to grips with some shit.”
I reached for the vodka bottle. “Like taking Reaper back? Or,” I leaned over, scooping up a glass, “having Trigger back?”
Dad’s eyes froze on mine for a moment. “You knew about Trigger?”
Shrugging my shoulders, “Found out when I got here.”
“Heard you were sharing a house with Reaper and his brother.”
I left the vodka lid off after pouring myself a shot. I had a feeling I was going to be in need of a refill. “Yeah, I had been. Drake and I are good mates. Didn’t know about Reaper being his brother, though.”
Dad’s chest rumbled from a bitter laugh. “You always had a habit of missing the obvious.”
“Don’t see how Reaper and Drake being brothers was obvious.”
“Not that.” Dad shook his head, “Reaper moving in; you didn’t put two and two together.”
I frowned, “What are you implying?”
“Reaper and I had a fight; it was about Drake. Reaper did something behind the club’s back to save his brother’s arse. Always is cleaning up after him.” Dad rolled the glass around with his fingers. “Reaper took his cut off but soon realized it was a mistake. But by then, he had reached out to Drake, and I heard about you moving in with him so...”
“So you got Reaper to move in with us?” His motives snapped into place. “To what, keep an eye on me?”
“You were off the rails, Abby. You needed someone to watch your back.”
“Why are you telling me this now?”
Dad’s lips twitched into a smile. “Making sure you got a clear picture and didn’t come back here because you were following someone.”
God, he jumped to conclusions. “I thought Reaper was in deep with the Vikings. Had no idea he was heading back here.” To be honest, if anyone was following someone, it was Reaper following me.
; “Then,” He placed his glass down and walked around the bar. He opened his arms. “It’s good to have you back, darling. Welcome home.”
And what a welcome it was.
Chapter 28
Abby
When you grow up with a father called Roach, I guess it was obvious that you don’t really get that much love. I suppose it was only natural that as women, Kim and I chased affection. I also guess it was no surprise that this wasn’t the first time I was putting Dad to bed.
“Come on, Dad, nearly there.” I groaned, buckling under his weight. I pushed open Dad’s door, and the old familiar smell engulfed me.
“God, Dad, clean much?” I grumbled and let go of his weight; he collapsed half on half off the bed.
“You were always the good one,” he slurred, trying to pat me on the back but instead patted the bedpost. “Never getting in trouble. Always smiling.”
Was it terrible of me to be smiling right now? “Yes, Dad. Just sleep it off, okay?”
“Don’t go.” His large tattooed hand reached out for me. “You can’t leave yet.”
“I’m not leaving yet. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” With caution, I made my way back out. This room was disgusting. “You know, Dad, you really need to get someone to clean this.”
I closed the door and sighed. Since Dad told me about Reaper, I couldn’t get it out of my head. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to know why and how he managed to lie to me so well.
While the party might be dying down, my night was definitely not over.
***
Reaper
Abby had disappeared for the rest of the night. I didn’t have the guts to ask anyone where she was. And once the clock ticked two and I still hadn’t seen her, I was sure she had left.
That was, until right then as I watched her randomly turn drunk men over in the bar.
“What are you doing?”
She spun around, shocked. “I… um.” She straightened up, wearing a startled expression. “I was looking for you.”
“In a pile of drunk bikers?” I crossed my arms. “Do I look like the type to pass out?”
“Don’t...” She pointed a finger at me and tiptoed over a few bodies towards me. “Don’t you dare do that cute arrogance thing on me.”
“Cute arrogance? Didn’t know I had such a gift.”
She scoffed loudly.
“Thought you had left, Abby,” I told her honestly. “Haven’t seen you all night.”
“Well, you did tell me to stay away from you.” The dirty look she was giving me fell for a moment. “I’ve been catching up with Dad.”
Her look went from dirty to hurt in an instant. I knew then her dad had given her all the details.
“Abby, don’t.”
“Don’t Abby me!” she hissed. “You were spying on me!”
“Wasn’t like that.”
“What was it like then? You only reported to him every second day?”
“Will you calm down?”
The judgment in her eyes was clear. “You know, all I wanted to do was find you and hope that you had a good reason for doing it!” Her shoulder hit mine as she went to leave.
Typical Abby. Things get hard and she runs away.
She was halfway up the stairs when I grabbed her wrist.
“Would you let me explain?”
“Let go of my arm, Kade.” She glared over her shoulder down at me. “You’re a liar.”
“You said that you wanted a good reason?” I was about to do something stupid; I knew that. I had done a lot of stupid things. This shouldn’t be terrifying, but to me, it was.
With her back to me, I brushed the hair off her shoulder.
Lowering my mouth to her bare skin, I softly kissed her, working my way up her neck.
I knew she hated herself for not pulling away from me.
So I had to tell her the truth, and fuck if I knew how things would work after that.
Wrapping an arm around her stomach, I pulled her against me. “I did what I did, Abby, because I love you.”
Her breathing intensified. She twisted in my arms until we were face to face. Her silence was killing me.
“Say something, Abby.” I needed to know what she was thinking. Her cold expression was scaring the hell out of me. If she turned away from me right now, that would be it. I would never try again.
Lowering her forehead against mine, “You’re saying what I want to hear.”
I didn’t expect that.
“You think I’m lying?”
A hurt expression crept across her face. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”
“I’m not lying, Abby. I love you. Why else would I be here?”
“Because it is your home.”
“I don’t have a home, Abby. I don’t belong to anyone, anything. I don’t make roots. But I always come back to you.”
She had built some pretty tough walls, and she wasn’t letting me get through easily.
Bracing my shoulders, she pushed herself away from me. “I wish I could believe you.” She took a step up, away from me. “But I can’t.”
Then that is when it happened. She turned her back on me and walked away, leaving me speechless, standing on a fucking staircase looking like a complete heartbroken loser. She didn’t believe me.
I knew things were messed up. I knew I had stuffed up, but she was no innocent party in that either.
Fuck it. I wasn’t letting her just walk away from me, from this, us. So I followed her steps and found myself looking at a familiar wooden door. I would make her believe me.
I knocked once, and the door flung open, I was ready to spill my heart, but her smiling face took me by surprise.
“What took you so long?” she smirked, holding the door open. “Thought you would have already pulled my door off the hinges.”
“Was deciding if you were worth it.” I stumbled out a fake confident lie.
Chewing her bottom lip, she took a step forward, grabbing my shirt and pulling me towards her.
I knew when her lips hit mine that there would be no more conversations, at least for tonight.
My hands ran down her sides as I kicked her door shut. Her curves were perfect and I had been dying to touch every inch of her. Now was my chance and like a greedy man on death row getting his last wish, I gripped her tightly, not wanting to let go.
Her lips tasted of sweet chocolate and vodka. Most likely her last meal. It bothered me she wasn’t eating properly. But right now, as I claimed her lips, it wasn’t the right time to give her a lecture.
I lifted her up and her legs locked around my waist. Yep, right there. That’s where I wanted her. Her hands were going to the bottom of her tank top, but I was one step ahead of her. I ripped it off and tossed it to the ground.
Our kiss broke as I lowered her to the bed.
“God, you are incredible.” The words tumbled out as I stared down at the sight in front of me. The black lace bra, her slightly burnt shoulders and cleavage. Her blonde hair fanned out, but that was nothing compared to the smile on her face, looking up at me.
“You know, Kade, you already have me. You don't have to compliment me.”
Have her. Was she mine?
What did I do to deserve her?
“You sure about this?” I didn't want to believe that Abby was actually agreeing to be with me again. After everything I had put her through. Yet here she was. Putting herself on the line again.
I don't know what I expected her to say. Maybe quickly shatter off the bed. Heck, hide in the bathroom again when she realized how I wasn't worth the risk.
So you could have knocked me over when she started giggling.
“Seriously Kade, you expecting me to back out? I dragged YOU in here.” She sat up on her elbows and looked me straight in the eye “Are you the one having second thoughts?”
No. Maybe I just couldn't believe my luck? But my lack of movement made her frown.
>
“You can't start something and not finish!” she sighed underneath me. “But if you’re not up for it, maybe I'll just have to find someone else. Brad might still be up somewhere.” I knew she was teasing, but that was enough to bring the caveman out of me.
“Like hell.”
She giggled and ran her hand down my chest. “Lucky for you, I kind of have a thing for you.”
“Good.” I lowered my mouth to her ear. “Cause you’re mine.” And I meant that. Somehow, some way, I was going to make sure it stayed that way.
Chapter 29
Abby
“What are you doing?”
I quickly averted my eyes, feeling like the one who had just got caught out because I had.
“Nothing.” I avoided Kim’s eyes, knowing she didn’t buy it. “What are you doing up so early?”
“Don’t lie to me, you were totally checking Kade out.” She gave me a knowing smile. “So you going to fill me in on what changed?”
She didn’t realize what she was asking was impossible to answer. How can everything have changed between Kade and I, but yet some things still stayed the same?
I knew he loved me. He knew I loved him; and as for last night, well, nights like that changed everything for any girl. How had the man gotten so skilled?
I mentally hit myself for thinking that and then had a sudden urge to slap him. Because there is only one way someone gets that skilled.
Kim snapped her fingers in front of my face. “Abby, get out of the daydream and answer my question.”
What was her question again? I frowned for a moment before remembering. “Oh right. Um, nothing changed. All is good, you know.”
“If you are going to lie, at least put some effort behind it.”
“I’m not lying. Reaper and I are good. Friends, but not friends, you know what I mean?”
“I don’t think even a trained psychiatrist would know what you mean.”
I rolled my eyes. “Why does it matter anyway?”
“Because,” She took a step closer to me, lowering her voice. “You’re currently giving that poor boy the sexy kitten eyes. I’m just interested in what he did to deserve them.”
“I am not!” I was outraged. I did not do sexy kitten eyes. I grabbed her arm while pulling her away from the bar and out of sight of men eating their breakfast.
