by Simone Elise
I had only come back here to be with Abby.
That had backfired in some ways, but we were making amends till I lost my shit at her the other night.
Now I had a club to run, men to pull in line, and a woman who was leaning on every other man but me.
And it was all royally fucked up, thanks to myself.
“The girls are coming.” Brad hit my arm, pulling me from my thoughts.
Abby and Kim were walking down the hallway towards us.
“Abby looks like hell,” Drake muttered beside me.
“What did you expect?” I gave him a clipped reply.
Trigger was the first to make a move and went for Kim.
“You alright darling?” he asked her, taking her hand.
Abby just stood beside them, Brad’s jumper hanging down around her knees.
“They said we should go home and come back in the morning.” Her voice was weak and drained. “He’s in the best hands here, and there is nothing we can do, not while he is in the ICU anyway.”
“Well, that settles it then, you girls are coming home, eating, and getting a good’s night sleep.” Brad smiled gently at her; she attempted to smile back at him, but it didn’t light up her eyes like normal.
“Let’s go then,” I said, wanting nothing more than to get out this darn hospital and its dying patients.
Hospitals freaked me the fuck out.
Guess that didn’t help the situation now.
We all crammed into an elevator; Abby stood in front of me next to Drake. Took everything inside me not to reach out for her and pull her back towards me.
Then I thought fuck it, what was the worst she was going to do, push me away?
I threaded an arm around her waist and pulled her back against my chest. To my surprise, she didn’t fight it. Instead, she melted back into me.
The elevator door chimed, and everyone started to file out, but Abby didn’t make a move.
She turned in my arm to look up at me. “Can I ride home with you?”
She wasn’t angry with me. Her eyes didn’t hold resentment or hate towards me. It fucking shocked me to the core.
“You sure you don’t wanna go home in the van?” It was all I could string together.
“I want the fresh air.”
“It’s cold out.”
“If you don’t want me on the back of your bike, you can just say,” she said, deflated.
“Never said that, hun. Always want you on the back of my bike, you know that.”
Wasn’t romantic or anything, but it was the truth.
“Then it’s settled.” She pulled away from me, and we quickly exited the elevator before it shut, locking us back in this hellhole.
She wanted to ride with me. I stared at the back of her head. Why? Was fresh air the real reason?
By the time we caught up with the others, Kim was climbing into the back of the van, Trigger had already taken off on his Harley and Drake was in the van chatting to Brad.
“I’m going with Reaper,” Abby said, walking towards my bike.
Kim nodded her head, not arguing or questioning why, and I just followed Abby.
I straddled the bike, bracing it while she climbed on. Her slim arms wrapped around me, and I had to admit that it was the first time in days I felt calmer and not on edge.
Kicking the beast alive, I took off slowly, keeping in mind that Abby had had zero to no sleep and was in a weak condition. Still, I was taking the long way home, enjoying her clinging to me for once.
***
“You alright? You look frozen,” I questioned her while taking my helmet off.
We had taken the long way home. Still, it wasn’t enough. I wanted more time with her. When it came down to her, I was fucking greedy.
“I’m fine. Just tired.” She stared down at her feet, “Reaper, can I ask you something?”
“You can ask me anything; you know that.” I climbed off my bike, and we both slowly walked towards the house.
It bugged me that she wouldn’t look up from the ground. She was reminding me of her sixteen-year-old self.
“Are you going to yell at me like that again?” Her long blonde hair flicked to the side, and she finally stared up at me. “Like I’m just another one of the many girls you have?”
That’s what she thought? That I saw her as one of the many?
“I don’t see you like that. I was just having a fucking bad day, and somehow you ended up wearing it.” It still didn’t sit right with me. “I’m sorry, Abby.”
She started to chew her bottom lip, most likely keeping what else she wanted to say to herself.
“Can I ask you something else?” She tested the waters like she was scared I was going to fucking snap at her or something.
I gently gripped her lower arm, pulling her to a stop beside me. “I told you, Abby; you can ask me fucking anything, so spit it out. What’s really on your mind?”
She let out a long breath and ran a hand through her unwashed hair. God, she looked tired.
“Will you stay with me tonight?”
I blinked blankly at her. Had I heard her correctly?
“You don’t have to. It’s just I kind of don’t want to be on my own, and well, you’re the only one I would want in my bed. But it’s fine if you don’t want to. Heck, I get it. It’s not like we are a couple or anything.” Her eyes fell back down to the ground, and I wondered what had happened to the strong, confident side of her.
She must be just that worn out she couldn’t even put up a front.
“You sure you don’t want Drake or Brad?” I wasn’t saying it nasty or to start a fight. “You’re friends with them, it would be innocent.”
“And what, we aren’t friends?”
“Never were, never will be. Hold you a lot higher than a friend, Abby; you should know that.”
This time it was her turn to stare at me blankly. “Why couldn’t you just take responsibility for me then? Why did you let Dad scare you off?”
If I had an answer, I would give it to her. But I didn’t. Still didn’t.
“I don’t know-”
“You know I remembered what my last words were to Dad earlier,” she cut me off. “They were about you. I was yelling at him, arguing with him about you.”
“And that shit’s on me, not you. Your dad loves you, Abby; he wouldn’t hold it against you.”
“But I do.” She crossed her arms. “I care. Because I was fighting with him for what? You don’t even really want me, do you?”
So this is what it boiled down to.
If I wanted her or not?
Of course I wanted her. I’d die for her. Fuck, I’ve taken on bloke after bloke to keep her as mine. She just didn’t know about it.
“I love you, Abby.” I took a step forward. The truth was all I had. “I’ve never been great with responsibility. Fuck, it is one of the reasons I am who I am today. Why I joined the club. But shit has changed when it comes to you. You are… fuck, woman, you’re my everything, and I just didn’t wanna screw you up by making you mine.”
She breathed out. She breathed in. She stared at me blankly again. No emotion. No tears. No sign of fucking anything.
“I love you too, Kade.” Her lips cracked into a small smile. “Now please take me inside where it is warm.”
Just like that, the ice between us broke. She wasn’t out of reach anymore. She knew how I felt and she wasn’t yelling at me about it.
“I can do that.” I threw an arm around her shoulder, pulling her into my side, and we continued to walk towards the house.
She was mine now.
Heck, she was always mine, it’s just now, for the first time, I was openly declaring it.
Boy, I wasn’t looking forward to when her old man woke up and found out.
***
You know how there are moments in life where you just wished you could hold on to it for a bit longer and make the time tick slower to let that moment last longer without anything ruining it? As Abby s
lept with her head on my chest and one arm around me, that was exactly how I felt. I wanted the moment to last forever.
It hadn’t taken long for her to close those beautiful eyes and fall asleep. She tossed and turned and didn’t get comfortable until she rested her head on my chest and draped one of her slim arms across me like I was her teddy bear. I enjoyed every moment of it.
Still, I couldn’t figure out why such a beautiful girl would want anything to do with me. I wasn’t called the Reaper for no reason. I reminded most people of death, but she didn’t care. She hadn’t seen the men I killed or the blood on my hands. She saw through all that bullshit and still wanted to be with me.
She was perfect, and I was fucking lucky.
Abby
I slowly woke up, my eyes fluttering open. God, I was comfortable and warm. I moved to my side but was trapped under a heavy arm. My eyelids bounced open, and I recognized that tattooed arm immediately.
He stayed. I had thought he would take off as soon as I fell asleep.
I turned under his arm so I could see his face.
I ran a finger down his strong jawline. Kade really didn’t know how handsome he was. My fingers lingered on the tattoo on his neck.
My stomach turned when I recalled the way he said “I love you” last night. It still took the breath from me. I had always loved him. It was unconditional, and I was still coming to terms with it.
His eyes sprang open, and mine looked into his deep gray eyes.
It was a love so strong that it was undying; impossible to destroy. It was the type of love that filled novel’s pages, which romance movies aimed to feature.
Every bone in my body ached with a warning; every muscle stiffened with fear at the thought of him. But like the stubborn person I was, I didn’t listen to my own body’s warning.
He was a flame, able to burn through me. He was the flame, and I was the moth; unknowing of the harm this man could cause within me or the power that he would one day hold over me.
If I knew then what I knew now, would I still let myself be drawn to him? I often asked myself this question.
But now as I stared into his misty gray eyes I had my answer. Yes, I would do everything the same because I loved him, and this love was worth every torment I would face for being with him.
Every torment, every second glance, and every argument I was sure to have with my father. It was all worth it.
“Morning.” I smiled, and for a split second for the first time in days, my mind wasn’t on Dad.
Till I remembered.
“Morning,” his hand ran down my side and stopped on my hip. “How are you feeling?”
“Fine,” I stretched out. “Wonder how Dad is.”
“I’ll get dressed and take you up if you want.”
Frowning, I answered. “I’m sure you got more important things to do.” Like running the club.
“You come first.”
A sly smile spread across my lips, and my fingers danced down his arm. “Even Dad never put us in front of the club.”
“I’m not your father.”
“Good.” I grinned and leaned forward. “Cause I sort of like kissing you.” I curved into his muscular body.
“Fuck woman, you trying to kill me? Cause you’re doing everything to stop me from letting you out of this bed.”
I laughed, and it sounded so unfamiliar hearing it. “You never change, Kade.”
His grip on my hip tightened. “Not when it comes to you.”
“Seriously, you don’t have to take me to the hospital today. I can get Brad to take me or Drake.”
“Wanna explain what’s going on with you and Gitz?”
I cringed slightly, hearing Kade refer to Brad as Gitz. “Nothing.”
His thumb gently rubbed my cheek. “Ain’t nothing, sweetheart. He’s fallen hard for ya.”
“No, he isn’t.” I scoffed, finding it slightly amusing. “Seriously Kade, you’re worrying over nothing. Next thing you will be telling me Drake has come back because he is in love with me.”
“Nah, he knows fucking better. But that doctor sure as fuck doesn’t.”
I couldn’t suppress my grin. “You jealous, Kade?”
“You’re mine.” It was the rough growl that rumbled through his body as he said it that caused my body to freeze in chills.
My fingers ran down his chest, and I leaned my forehead against his. “And you’re mine.” It was the first time I had said it out loud.
“Yeah darling, I am.” His hand slipped underneath my tee. “Fucking wishing you didn’t have to get up right now.”
I smirked; I had him just where I wanted him.
Pity I had to get up.
“Oh fuck, I forgot to tell you.” My hand froze on his chest. “I called the Shields. They are on their way down.”
His eyebrows shot up. “And you’re just telling me that now.”
“I forgot.”
“Well, now we have to get up. Got to deal with fucking Jackson Johnston today.”
“They aren’t that bad.”
“Amber’s a bitch.”
“Kade.” I slapped his chest, “Don’t call my half sister that.”
“What? Are you saying that you aren’t slightly scared of her? She’s only five foot something, and I’ve seen men buckle at the knees under her intense glare.”
“Well, she’s coming.” I finished the conversation. “So we better get up.”
“Yeah, darling, we better.” He brushed the hair from the side of my face and pushed it behind my ears.
He was acting so sweet and caring. It made my heart crumble. If only others got to see this side of him. But then he wouldn’t be just mine.
Chapter 68
Abby
The Shields arrived that day, and they stayed for a solid week. During that time, Jackson and Troy helped Reaper deal with ‘club business.’ Amber, however, didn’t leave the hospital. Dad woke up four days into the week.
It was beyond relief.
He was stable. He could barely move, but he was stable and talking.
And two days after waking up, I could bet Reaper was wishing he hadn’t woken up cause he was bossing him around like anything.
Kind of made me smirk a lot, seeing Reaper being bossed around like a girl.
I think Dad was more settled knowing Jackson was there to back Reaper up.
But after Amber said her piece with the old man, they left.
Leaving Kim and me to deal with one grumpy old man.
“I told you, the one under that.” Dad pointed at the stack of magazines with his walking stick.
Kim sighed and dug the right mag out.
“Can’t wait to get the fuck out of here today,” Dad grumbled, flicking through the pages of a car magazine. “Sick of these four fucking walls.”
“Well, at least you aren’t sick of us.” I put my feet up on his bed.
“Where’s Reaper today?” he snapped at me.
“How am I meant to know?”
“Because you’re fucking him,” Dad roared out me.
How had Dad taken to mine and Reaper’s relationship? Well, seeing as we didn’t tell him and just started acting like a couple in front of him, maybe not the wisest move to do considering his health, but still, that didn’t stop us.
“Thanks for putting it so nicely.” I glared at him while searching in my handbag for my phone. “You know, Dad, you could at least pretend to be happy for me.”
What else was Dad sick of? Family time.
“Yeah, I’m over the fucking moon that my VP is hitting my daughter up.”
“I came to you about it first. Your attempt to scare him off just failed.” Much to my happiness.
“Never trust a man that would go behind a man's back and screw his daughter.”
“Then you must be really hating on Trigger now, too.” I glanced across at Kim with a smirk. About time she got some heat for their relationship.
Her eyes scorched mine before she turned to look at
Dad. “We aren’t in a relationship.”
“That’s even fucking worse,” Dad grunted, throwing the magazine down. “He just wants to ruin you.”
“Dad, you really should be proud. Wouldn’t you want us with men that can protect us?” I pointed out.
“I protect you.”
I rolled my eyes, “Well, someone else to be able to protect us.”
“Don’t need no one else. Never have. Never will.”
“Well, I needed Trigger when you were lying there like a corpse!” Kim defended her actions. “So Dad, yeah, we do need someone else apart from just you. I am going to get some fresh air.” She pushed the chair back, dragging it on the tiles.
She slammed the door after herself.
I think all this family time was getting to us. I leaned back in the chair and sighed. My mind slowly drifted back to something Amber had said before she left.
“See you’re still chasing the Reaper.” Amber crossed her arms, standing next to me.
“It’s not chasing when you already have him.” I highlighted that important fact and went to sit down. “What do you have against him?”
“He’s called the Reaper for a reason. He leaves a trail of bodies behind him. He’s not the guy you cuddle up with at night. He’s the type of guy you lock the fuck out.” Her words were firm.
“He’s not like that to me.”
“Clearly, because you wouldn’t be with him if you really knew him.”
“You know Jackson has a reputation, yet you're still with him.”
“I’ve known Jackson nearly my whole life. Hell, I’ve been by his side while he built that reputation.” She scoffed and sat down beside me. “Look, if you want to chase the Reaper, by all means, don’t let me stop you but just remember, he isn’t sunshine and rainbows. He has another side to him and until you see that side, you don’t really know him.”
Was she right? Did I not really know him? I had thought I had seen it when he came home covered with all that blood. Wasn’t that another side to him? Or was she referring to him killing? I swallowed sharply. Yeah, that was something I couldn’t wrap my head around.
“Dad?”
“Umm?” He was looking down at his phone.
