by Leigh Bale
“You think he’ll be all right?” Megan asked as she stood beside Jared and her children on the sidewalk.
The fading sunlight glimmered in the western sky, the air filled with the pungent aroma of cut grass.
Holding Caleb in his arms, Jared stared at the taillights of the Wilson’s car as they turned the corner and disappeared from view. “Yeah, he’ll be okay. From what I could see, Bill received second-degree burns. The blisters will be painful, but they shouldn’t do much damage to the muscle. He should heal fine.”
Megan’s forehead crinkled with worry, her eyes filled with empathy. Jared couldn’t help wondering if she was thinking about her own husband and the pains he must have suffered when he’d been caught in the wildfire that took his life. A protective impulse flooded him with the desire to help, but he knew there was nothing he could do. They said time healed all wounds, but he had his doubts. Though he’d finally realized he wanted a romantic relationship with Megan, the pain from his past wasn’t completely gone. He longed to push aside his own pain over his divorce and wished Megan could somehow get over losing her husband. He figured that was impossible, but he still hoped they both could find happiness again.
The puppy sat at their feet, silently panting. Even the little dog seemed to know this was not a happy occasion. A dark cloud of worry seemed to have blanketed them all.
Caleb reached out his hands and turned Jared’s face toward him. The boy’s bottom lip was quivering. “What’s gonna happen to Mr. Wilson?”
Jared exhaled a heavy sigh and met the child’s eyes. Out of his peripheral vision, he saw little June clutching her mommy’s hand as she leaned against the woman for support. The kids were scared, and he wanted to reassure them.
“Mr. Wilson is going to be okay,” he said. “Have you ever had a burn on your hand or arm?”
June spoke in a thin, vague tone. “Yes, from Mommy’s curling iron. It hurt really bad.”
“That’s right. But it healed up just fine, didn’t it?”
The girl rubbed her hand and nodded, as if remembering the pain. “Yes, I can’t even see the scar anymore.”
“Well, Mr. Wilson might have scars, but his wounds should heal well, too. I think he’s going to be all right.”
June gave a little sigh of relief.
“When I grow up, I’m gonna be a wildfire fighter, too. I want to be a hero just like you and my dad,” Caleb said with a determined lift of his head.
“Well, that’s nice. It’s a noble profession.” Jared’s smile widened. The boy’s words gave him a sense of pride. It delighted him that Caleb considered his profession heroic. But then Jared glanced at Megan. She’d gone very still. Her breath stuttered to a halt. She stood apart from him, not meeting his eyes. Not moving, not breathing. As though she were suspended in time.
“It’s time for us to go home, now.” Megan’s voice sounded low and firm. Disapproving.
“You sure? We didn’t get to play Frisbee, yet,” Jared said.
“I’m sorry, but I think it’s best if we go, now.” She reached out and pulled Caleb into her arms before setting him on his feet.
“Aww, can’t we stay a little while longer?” the boy asked.
“It’s getting late,” she said.
“But we didn’t get to play much with Sophie. I want to play Frisbee with Jared, too,” June said.
The girl’s words warmed Jared’s heart. In the beginning, she hadn’t liked him much, and he was relieved that her feelings had changed. And that’s when Jared realized that, if he loved Megan, he’d also have to accept responsibility for her two children. He’d have to love them both like a father should. He wouldn’t accept anything less. But if he ever broke up with Megan, it’d hurt more than he could bear. And Jared wasn’t sure he wanted to take that chance. But if he didn’t, he’d miss out on the joy a happy family life could bring to him. And he didn’t want to forgo that experience. It was a difficult conundrum.
“Maybe another time,” Megan said.
“Aww,” Caleb groaned.
Megan ignored her complaining children and started packing up the scattered remnants of their picnic. Jared helped her, sensing she’d had enough. He still couldn’t wrap his mind around what she’d told him. Because her husband had died in a wildfire, she’d written off ever loving another firefighter. He could understand her reticence. She didn’t want to be hurt, just like him. But for some reason, her rejection bit him hard. Megan didn’t want him, just as his ex-wife hadn’t wanted him. He thought about trying to convince Megan that they should be together, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to push her into something she didn’t want.
He busied himself with folding up the ruined blanket. Megan packed the food items into the basket, and the kids bounded across the grass with the puppy in hot pursuit.
“You okay?” Jared asked Megan.
“Yes, I’m fine.” But she didn’t look at him.
He laid a hand on her arm, longing to get through to her, yet wanting to run the other way. “We don’t have to leave, you know. It’s still early.”
She stilled, finally meeting his eyes. “This isn’t going to work, Jared.”
He inwardly sighed, reading so much in those few words. But a desperate flush of despair rushed over him. He didn’t want to lose her. He knew that now, deep in his heart. “I know you’re worried about the kids. But I’d like to be a part of their lives. I’d like to be a part of your life, too, Megan.”
He stepped near, remembering the night that he’d kissed her. There was hesitancy written in her eyes. She looked up, her expression sad and hopeful all at the same time. Her lips parted on a forlorn sigh.
“No. I can’t, Jared. I’ve got to go.” She brushed past him and reached to pick up the basket.
* * *
She tossed the refuse into the can and stood there for the count of three. Then, she turned. In her eyes, he saw all the sorrow of the world.
“I can’t. Not again,” she said.
He released a pent-up sigh and slid his hands into his pockets. “Megan, I’m not going to die anytime soon. If you’re afraid of that, you can put it aside. Bill Wilson just had a little accident. It’s not going to happen to me. I’m a good firefighter, and I don’t usually have to work on the fire line anymore. I’m an administrator now. You can stop worrying about that. I wish you’d trust me.”
She brushed her bangs back from her eyes. “Trust has nothing to do with it, Jared. You’ll be up working in the fire camp and out on the line, to check on what’s happening. I know how it works. As long as you’re fighting fire, you’ll be in harm’s way. Blaine was good at his job, too. He didn’t plan on dying either, but he did. You have no control over the winds or if the fire rolls over the top of you.”
He felt a sinking despair. How could he fight against her fear? She didn’t want him because he was a wildfire fighter. She was afraid. Of his dangerous profession. Of him. Afraid they might get close and then he’d get killed. Afraid it’d break her children’s hearts. And maybe her heart, too.
“Any of us could die at any moment, Megan. It could happen anywhere, anytime, to any person. A house fire. A car accident. A brain aneurysm. Cancer. None of us knows the moment or hour when we could be hurt. But we can’t live our lives in fear. I wish you’d have a little more faith in me. And maybe have a little faith in God, too.”
She shook her head. “I can’t take chances again. I don’t have that luxury.”
Gathering up the quilt, she turned and called to the children. “Come on, kids. We’re going home.”
Jared just stood there. His ex-wife had hated his profession. Not because it was dangerous, but because it required them to live in small, backward towns throughout the Western United States. A job he absolutely loved. Several times, Sharon had even been rude and condescending to his boss. She’d purposefull
y kept from passing on phone messages to him when his office had called. She’d done everything she could to get him to quit. But his work had sustained him through the painful divorce, and he’d vowed never again to allow a woman to jeopardize his career. But now, here he was again, facing another woman that didn’t like his work, but for completely different reasons. And the result was the same.
Megan didn’t want him, just as Sharon didn’t want him.
“I’ll take you home,” he said, feeling lost and hurt all at the same time.
As they walked to his truck, got inside and he drove them to his place so Megan could retrieve her vehicle, he couldn’t help thinking that love wasn’t worth this much hassle. It wasn’t worth the pain. Maybe he was doomed to live his life alone. A single bachelor with no children of his own. No one to worry about. No one to love.
Unless he could convince Megan differently.
Chapter Twelve
Boom! Kaboom!
Megan jerked awake, her eyes staring wide at the ceiling in her bedroom. Faint sunlight filtered through the lacy curtains. She glanced at the digital clock sitting on the nightstand. Six o’clock in the morning. Sunrise. She groaned and rolled over onto her side. Maybe she could get a few more minutes of sleep.
“Mommy! Mommy!” Caleb and June scurried into the room together.
The two kids jumped smack in the middle of the bed and burrowed against Megan’s sides.
“Hi, sweethearts.” She kissed each one on the forehead and wrapped her arms around them.
Boom!
Caleb gasped and ducked his head beneath the covers. “The whole world is blowing up.”
His muffled words made Megan chuckle. “No, sweetie. It’s just the cannon blast telling us that it’s Founder’s Day and we should get up and go to the parade.”
“Is that why we’re not opening the restaurant until later?” June asked.
“Yep. We have the morning off. It was kind of nice to sleep in for a change, wasn’t it?” She tickled them both, enjoying their squeals of laughter.
“What time is the parade?” June asked.
“Ten o’clock, but we’ll need to arrive early if we want to get a good place to set up our lawn chairs. Shall we get ready and go?” she asked.
“Yeah.” Caleb nodded solemnly.
“Definitely,” June said.
They scrambled off the bed and raced into their rooms to get dressed. Megan was glad they had this opportunity to feel like a normal family. The parade would fortify them for the hectic workday ahead at the restaurant. No doubt they’d be swamped by lots of customers.
Two hours later, Megan had made the kids breakfast burritos and driven them over to Main Street. She parked the truck in the alleyway behind the bakery, then let them help her haul their chairs up the sidewalk. The sun blazed bright, the wind wafting the smell of popcorn from a vending booth where the cheerleader squad from the high school was trying to make a little extra money for their team. The steady flow of people told Megan it would be a large crowd, even for a small town like Minoa.
Parents laughed with their children, some carrying balloons and tall glasses of lemonade from another vendor—the baseball team, trying to earn enough money to buy new uniforms. Megan purchased a drink for her and the kids to share, glad to contribute to the cause. Blaine had played baseball in high school, and she couldn’t help feeling a bit nostalgic today. The last time she’d come to this parade, he’d been by her side, carrying Caleb on his broad shoulders.
“Where’s Jared?” June asked.
“I have no idea,” Megan replied, wishing her children would forget about the man.
“Can we sit with him?” Caleb said.
“I don’t know if we can even find him in this crowd.” Megan spoke reluctantly. She hadn’t planned on sitting with Jared to watch the parade and would rather avoid him, if possible. Being near him was wreaking havoc on her nerves. Mostly because she liked him so much.
A man bumped into her, propelling her toward another woman standing in front of her. Megan caught herself just in time, barely avoiding a collision.
“Excuse me, ma’am,” the man said.
She smiled with understanding. The crush of people was heavy this year, which meant the restaurant would be very busy this afternoon. In years past, Megan had always gauged the customers they had at the restaurant off of the crowd attending the parade. It looked as if they’d have plenty of business.
“Hi, Megan.” Susan Wilson waved at her from the street corner.
A woman with long, dark hair and a cheery face, Susan sat with her children on a blanket spread across the small bit of grass in front of the hardware store. Her husband sat in a wicker chair beside her.
Megan paused to say hello. “Hi, there. How are you doing, Bill?”
The burly man smiled from beneath the wide brim of his straw hat and carefully stretched his legs out in front of him. He wore knee-length shorts, exposing his left calf wrapped in a white bandage. A pair of crutches rested on the ground at his feet.
“I’m good, thanks to you and Jared. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t been there in the park that day.”
A sudden warmth flooded her cheeks. “I didn’t do anything. It was all Jared’s quick thinking.”
“Well, we’re beyond grateful.”
“We sure are,” Susan said. “And it was kind of you to bring dinner in the next day. I’ve never been so happy to see my Bill tackled to the ground. If Jared hadn’t done that, Bill might have gone up in flames.”
Megan doubted it, but the damage to Bill’s leg could have been much worse. The entire incident could have been catastrophic. Thank goodness Jared had been there. She knew the world needed firefighters. Especially ones as skilled and caring as him.
But when she thought back on Caleb telling Jared he wanted to be a wildfire fighter when he grew up, Megan’s blood went cold and her heart turned to ice. The thought of losing her dear little child to a fire like the one that had killed his father made her tremble with fear. She hated to hurt Jared’s feelings by telling him she didn’t want to date him anymore, but she couldn’t take the chance that she’d love and lose him, either.
“I’m just glad you’re going to be all right.” She patted Bill’s shoulder.
“Megan! Over here.”
Megan lifted her arm to shield her eyes against the sun. Connie sat with Tim in front of the Forest Service office. She was waving to get Megan’s attention. A number of fire personnel sat clustered around her, all of them laughing and chatting.
“Come on.” Taking Caleb’s hand, she led her children over to them.
“Hi, Megan,” Tessa greeted her, sitting on a bench beside Sean.
“Hi, buddy.” Zach swooped Caleb up in his arms and whirled the boy around. Caleb’s laughter filled the air.
“Do me, too,” June said. She reached her arms out and Zach obliged her.
With her children occupied by the strong firefighter, Megan folded out her lawn chairs and set them close beside Connie and Gayle beneath the wide spread of an elm tree.
“Hi there,” Connie smiled.
“Hello. Looks like we haven’t missed anything.”
“No, the parade hasn’t started yet.”
“I feared we wouldn’t be able to find a decent spot. It’s crowded this year,” Megan said.
“You always have a place here with us,” Gayle said.
Megan returned the woman’s smile. She chatted for a few moments with several other hotshot employees. They all greeted her with friendly smiles. “Where’s Jared?” Gayle asked.
Megan stared at the woman, startled by her question. “How should I know?”
“I thought you two were together, now.”
Several people were staring at her, and Megan�
�s face heated up like road flares. She wanted to dispel any illusions that she and Jared were romantically involved but figured it would come out wrong. “No, we’re just friends.”
Okay, it sounded lame, but she said it anyway. Friends was nice and neutral. Wasn’t it?
“Sure, uh-huh. Anyone can see that you light up like a fire engine every time he’s around. And he obviously feels the same about you,” Gayle teased, throwing a knowing look in her direction.
Megan stammered and blinked, feeling odd and anxious. Two months ago, she could hardly imagine being in a serious relationship with any man except Blaine. And this situation made her reevaluate what Jared meant to her. He was just a nice man who had been kind to her and her children. There wasn’t anything else to it.
Or was there?
No! There couldn’t be. She couldn’t allow it. But she didn’t respond to Susan. Any protests would only draw more attention to the topic. Better to just remain quiet.
“It’s starting, it’s starting.” June jumped up and down and clapped her little hands.
Music sounded as horses from the equine club clattered past on the street. The two lead riders carried the US and state flags.
Tim immediately stood, removed his hat and placed his right hand over his heart as he showed respect for his country. Little Caleb copied the man’s actions exactly, looking so much like his father that it made Megan’s eyes sting. She blinked, feeling grateful and worried at the same time. Her children needed a father. No wonder they’d become so attached to Jared.
“I can’t see.” Caleb craned his neck this way and that, trying to look around the hefty woman standing in front of him.
“Well, we can’t have that.” Zach lifted the boy up onto his wide shoulders.
