“But I cannot stop thinking about it.” He pulled her closer again just to feel her quiver. “Can you?”
Chapter 14
Two days after Lady Cantwell’s ball, Elizabeth had the answer she’d been waiting for. While she should rush and tell Will that she wasn’t with child, she decided to avoid him for one more day. After his lewd banter at the ball, she had no desire to see him again.
If only that were true.
She did want to see him. And she wanted to see him naked and lying in bed. There was something dreadfully wrong with her. Never in her life had she felt this way about a man. Now it was all she could think of, and at all times of the day and night.
Unfortunately, avoiding him the past two days had only made the yearning worse. At least for the next few days, she wouldn’t be able to act upon those lustful feelings. But she supposed she should stop ignoring him.
A light knock sounded on her bedroom door. “Yes?”
“Miss Seaton is here to see you, miss. Shall I tell her you are not at home?” her maid asked, peeking through the doorway.
“I shall be down presently.”
“I will show her to the small salon, then.”
“Thank you, Susan.”
Elizabeth wondered what might bring Victoria around this afternoon. Having not seen her friend since their outing to Whitechapel, this would give her the opportunity to question Victoria. Elizabeth doubted it could have been her friend in such a crime-ridden section of town.
After a quick check in the mirror, Elizabeth walked down the stairs, still looking to avoid Will. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to be about today.
As she reached the front hall, she stopped and asked Kenneth, “Where is His Grace?”
“Out, my lady.”
“Out? With whom?” she asked.
“Lord Selby,” Kenneth replied.
Well, at least Avis’s husband was a huge step up from that wastrel Somerton. Elizabeth continued into the small salon where Victoria sat staring at a painting Jennette had done a few years ago.
“Victoria,” Elizabeth said before sitting down on the brocade sofa. “What brings you here today?”
Victoria smiled and pushed a strand of blond hair out of her face. “I wanted to make sure Mrs. Weston was working out for little Sarah.”
“Mrs. Weston is wonderful. She has been working with Sarah to teach her to read. Sarah loves her.”
“Oh, thank God,” Victoria mumbled and quickly covered her mouth.
“Why do you say that?”
Victoria slowly removed her hand from her mouth. “I have never made a recommendation for a friend. I was worried that Mrs. Weston would not work out with Sarah.”
“She is perfect.” Elizabeth wondered why Victoria seemed so relieved. It was just a governess. Elizabeth remembered having three different ones when she was a child.
“Victoria, you will not believe this but the duke insisted on an outing to Whitechapel with the older girls the other day.”
Victoria’s brows furrowed. “Why would he insist on taking them there?”
“To show them the poverty of London, and how dreadfully we treat our poor. But as we drove past a pawnbroker’s shop, a woman walked out of the store. She looked exactly like you.”
Victoria’s face paled slightly, but then she said, “How odd. You must have been mistaken since I never go to that section of town.”
“I figured as much. I just thought it fascinating that there is another woman who looks so much like you.”
“Perhaps she is my long-lost twin,” Victoria said with a laugh.
If her laugh hadn’t sounded so forced, Elizabeth might have believed her. It could not possibly have been Victoria. But Elizabeth hadn’t convinced herself of that yet.
“How are the plans for the ball?” Victoria asked, effectively changing the subject.
“Good, but I’m getting nervous.” Elizabeth waited while a footman brought in tea for them. She poured a cup for them and handed one to Victoria.
“The ball?” Victoria reminded her.
“Yes, of course.” Elizabeth added some cream to her tea. “I have never planned a ball by myself.”
“You will do wonderfully.”
“Will you come? Please?” Elizabeth already knew the answer but hoped that for once her friend would disregard Society.
“You know I cannot. I am not one of you,” Victoria answered with a nonchalant shrug.
“You are the daughter of a vicar. Surely, there must be a lord in your background somewhere? That is all these people care about.”
Victoria smiled and shook her head. “No lords that I am aware of.”
“Come anyway?”
“I cannot. But I want you to tell me all about it next week.”
Elizabeth closed her eyes. “Please do not remind me that it’s only six days away.”
“If you need my help, please, just let me know.”
“Thank you, dear friend.” Elizabeth wanted desperately to tell someone what she’d done with Will. The secret was driving her mad. But of all her friends, Victoria was the last one she could mention an indiscretion to without getting a long lecture on the sin of sexual congress before marriage.
This was one secret she had to keep to herself.
Will opened the door before the butler could reach it. He hadn’t felt this invigorated in months, maybe even years. For the first time, his life had direction. He knew what he was going to do now.
After taking the steps two at a time, he opened the door to his room. His valet walked in behind him.
“Good evening, Your Grace.”
“Good evening, Stevenson.” Will removed his own jacket while his valet opened the linen press. “Is there an engagement tonight?”
“The opera, Your Grace.”
“Of course. We are to dine here, though, correct?”
“Yes, Your Grace.”
“Very well, then. I leave my attire in your fine hands.” Will washed up at the basin while Stevenson picked out the perfect jacket for dinner and then the opera.
Twenty minutes later, he was dressed and ready to eat. He entered the salon to find Elizabeth and his siblings waiting for him. Stopping at the threshold, he was once again amazed by the transformation of the children. The boys, while fidgeting, were well dressed and relatively quiet. Sarah, dressed in a pretty pink dress, sat on the wingback chair with a smile on her face.
“Where have you been?” Elizabeth asked, approaching him with a glass of sherry.
“I attended Parliament with Lord Selby.” Will took the outstretched glass and sipped it. The fruity essence of the liquor teased his tongue.
Before he could take another sip, the footman announced dinner.
“Are we still to attend the opera tonight?” he asked Elizabeth as she walked past him.
“Yes, I think Ellie and Lucy will enjoy it.”
“And tomorrow we work in my study.”
She paused and then agreed. “Very well.”
They rushed through dinner to get to the opera. Ellie and Lucy could barely contain their excitement during the carriage drive.
“Are you certain we look all right, Elizabeth?” Ellie asked, looking down at her saffron dress. “I’ve never worn anything as exquisite as this gown.”
“You both look beautiful. I expect many gentlemen will stop by our box during intermission.”
Will didn’t like the sound of that. His sisters were too young for suitors.
As if she’d read his mind, Elizabeth said, “Don’t worry, Will. They have not made their bow yet. Most of the gentlemen will respect that and only call after.”
“Then perhaps we should postpone their bow,” Will muttered.
“No, Will!” Ellie and Lucy said in unison.
Elizabeth laughed. “He will not cancel on the queen.”
“I might,” Will replied with a smile.
“No, you will not.”
“If you say so,” he said with a chuckle. The carriage
stopped and they all clamored out. As they walked inside and to their box, Will heard the whispered murmurings of their arrival.
They took their seats and he couldn’t help but notice the people covertly pointing to their box. He sensed the eyes of several women both young and old on him as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Never in his life had he felt this out of place.
“Do sit still, Your Grace,” Elizabeth said sharply. “Everyone is staring.”
“At me.”
“Of course. You are the duke. Your position demands respect and admiration.” Elizabeth smiled at him. “And there is that fact that you are an unmarried duke.”
“Maybe I should alter that state quickly,” he replied with a meaningful glance at her.
“Perhaps you should decide if you are staying in this country or leaving,” Elizabeth retorted.
“Leaving?” Lucy looked over at them. “You are not still thinking of leaving England, Will. What more could you want than this?”
He had no chance to reply as the musicians started playing. Athough, it gave him more time to think. What else could he want? Until a week ago, he would have said America has everything he could ever want. But America didn’t have Elizabeth, and she would never leave England.
Should that matter? He had known her for just over a fortnight. That wasn’t enough time to know her or to love her. If he left, she would stay behind. And while that should not bother him, for some reason it did. He liked her companionship, even when she became waspish when he did something wrong.
He slid a glance over at her. She stared down at the stage, entranced by the performance. The opera did nothing for him. He found the music too shrill, and his mind continued to wander.
The emerald dress she’d worn tonight complemented her eyes. The lower cut bodice allowed him a perfect view of her rounded breasts, and he steeled himself against the sudden rush of desire. He wanted her again. Only this time, he wanted to strip off each piece of clothing and lay her nude body on his soft bed.
Far too quickly, intermission started and the door to their box opened as the footman announced their first guest.
“Lord Hampton, Your Grace.”
A young man with jet-black hair and blue eyes bowed to them all. “Your Grace, it is an honor to finally meet you.”
“Hampton, good to meet you.” Will watched as the man blatantly stared at Lucy. “This is my cousin, Lady Elizabeth,” he said, looking over at Elizabeth. “And my sisters, Ellie—”
“Eleanor and Lucia,” Elizabeth finished for him with a glare.
“You may call me Lucy,” Lucy said.
Elizabeth groaned softly. Her frustration at his sister’s manners was clear.
“Lady Lucia, it is a pleasure,” Hampton said, bowing over Lucy’s hand. “And yours also, Lady Eleanor.”
Ellie appeared rather put out by Hampton’s obvious favoritism of Lucy. Within five minutes, Ellie had nothing to be envious of, as the entire box filled with young men vying for her attention, as well.
Will noticed Elizabeth’s color and wondered why she looked so uncomfortable. He leaned over and asked her, “Are you well?”
“Yes, I am perfectly fine,” she snapped.
Oh, yes, any woman who answered like that was fine, he thought sarcastically. “Why are you uncomfortable?”
“I am not!” She stood and made her way through the crowd to the door.
Unable to leave his sisters alone with all the young bucks, he was forced to sit through another excruciating ten minutes without Elizabeth’s company.
Elizabeth stood against the wall trying to catch her breath. Inside that box she’d felt as if she were suffocating. She was a fraud. Ever since her father’s declaration that she wasn’t his daughter, she considered herself a sham. Tonight, watching all the men pour into the box to visit with Ellie and Lucy, all those painful sensations had returned.
She wanted to be Lady Elizabeth in truth.
The only way for that to happen was to marry Will and become the duchess. She couldn’t do that. If she had only wanted a title, there had been plenty of men during her first two Seasons who would have married her just to be associated with the duke’s name. She wanted more than just a title. She wanted love.
She had watched Jennette’s parents and had seen how much they loved each other, even with their huge difference in ages. That was Elizabeth’s aspiration. She wanted love, and to forge a union that would last, with no infidelity.
She was certain a love like that existed. Perhaps just not for her. Her stomach roiled. Why not for her? Her friends seemed to have such a love. What was wrong with her that she could not have that too?
“Are you unwell, Elizabeth?”
Elizabeth looked up to see her cousin, Richard, staring down at her with concern on his face. “I am all right. The box filled with young men looking for an introduction to the duke’s sisters. I needed a little air.”
“Queasy, then?” Richard asked, looking even more worried.
“Only slightly. I am perfectly all right now and will return to the box.”
Richard held out his arm for her. “Let me escort you back.”
“Thank you, Richard.” Perhaps now that Will was here, Richard had given up on his idea of being duke.
“You must take better care of yourself, Elizabeth. Have you thought about taking a husband?”
“A husband? You know I have a very small dowry, Richard. Who would want me?” Elizabeth hated how pathetic she sounded.
“There must be someone you might have an interest in,” Richard continued.
Elizabeth felt heat scorch her cheeks. “No, there is no one.”
Richard returned to his seat next to Caroline. He had a terrible feeling about Elizabeth.
“Well?” Caroline asked.
“We cannot discuss it here.”
“Then we shall depart now,” Caroline commanded.
“Of course.”
They slipped out of their seats and waited impatiently for their carriage to be brought around. As soon as he sat down across from her, the interrogation began.
“What happened?”
“Elizabeth was standing outside the box against the wall with her hands on her stomach.”
“Why?” Caroline asked.
“She said she needed air because of all the young men in the booth seeking an introduction to the duke’s sisters.”
Caroline tilted her head and then nodded. “Well, that makes sense. Those boxes are a bit confining.”
“Yes,” Richard drawled.
“But you don’t believe her?” Caroline’s brows drew downward forming a crease in her forehead.
“I cannot say why, but I think there is more going on here than she is admitting.”
“You can’t mean…”
Richard nodded. “She looked pale and had her hand on her stomach.”
“It’s impossible. He’s only been here a fortnight.” Caroline paused and bit her lip. “She wouldn’t even know for certain by now.”
“Maybe she doesn’t know. Maybe she doesn’t even suspect yet.”
“We can’t let this happen,” Caroline said. “I think there is only one option.”
Richard shook his head. He hated this idea more than any other idea she’d ever fabricated. “I think we should wait.”
“Oh? Until she is fat with child and a ring already on her finger?” Caroline glared at him. “This has to end now.”
“Caroline, this isn’t right.”
Caroline laughed in a shrill tone. “This isn’t right? But allowing that upstart colonial to become duke is?”
“We both know that is out of our control.”
“Out of our control?” she almost shrieked. “You and the duke’s relatives were twins. For all we know, your relative could have been mistaken for the younger son and you could be the rightful heir.”
Richard shook his head. She would never give up until she became duchess, or one of her children became duke. He doubted that she car
ed one bit for how he felt about any of this.
“Caroline, the twins were marked so there could be no mistake.”
“Marked?”
“Scarred on their bottom. There could be no switching of their identities.”
“It matters not. You still deserve to be duke,” Caroline insisted.
Richard wanted to reach over and strangle his wife. But he couldn’t. He knew he’d lost because no matter what he said, Caroline would do as she pleased. It had been that way for the past five years.
“Very well, Caroline. Do as you wish.”
Chapter 15
The next morning Elizabeth pulled another book off the shelf in Will’s study. She flipped through the pages, looking for anything that might lead her to a clue about her mother’s diary. Will had yet to join her so she relished the peace. The children were attending to their studies, and it was the first time since Will had arrived that she had been in the study alone. Already, the room was starting to feel like his.
After placing the first book back, she reached for another. This was a volume of poetry by Byron. Remembering her mother’s love of poetry, she turned each page carefully, expecting something to be there. Other than a small violet pressed into the center, the book contained nothing but poetry.
“How is the hunt going?”
Elizabeth turned at the sight of Will and sighed. The morning sun illuminated his brown hair with reddish highlights. The black jacket he wore spread across his broad shoulders. He looked too handsome. Oh, drat. She had to get herself under control.
“No luck so far,” she replied in a voice lighter than she felt.
“Well, let me start over here.” Will started at the other end of the cherry bookshelves. “What exactly are we looking for?”
“A diary. Or a piece of paper that might refer to where something is hidden. Or maybe some reference to a secret drawer or panel.”
Will chuckled. “So we are looking for something but we don’t know exactly what.”
Hearing him say that made her realize just how unlikely it was that she would ever discover the truth of her heritage. She stared down at the book in her hands and wanted to throw the damned thing across the room.
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