“I need to get a fucking condom,” he whispered. “Shit. It’s in my car. I don’t keep them in my wallet anymore.”
I groaned and let out a little laugh. “You couldn’t have thought of that before you got all naked, and I was holding your dick?” I asked.
“Hey, I couldn’t help it. I really wanted you to hold my dick.”
“Hold on right there,” I whispered. And then I ran off, a laugh bursting free from my lips because I was bouncing everywhere. He just stood there, standing in my living room, completely naked.
I would’ve thought this might ruin the mood, but not even a little. I went to my bathroom, pulled out a box of condoms, ripped it open, and spread the packages all over the floor, all the while continuing to laugh like I had lost my damn mind. I brought four of them with me into the living room.
Cross raised a brow, his gaze on my hand and then my breasts as I put my hands on them to keep them steady.
“Really? I’m not as young as I used to be. Maybe we can get through two. Perhaps three.”
I froze, blinking. “I was just kidding with the number of condoms I grabbed.” I paused. “Three times?” I asked, my voice really high-pitched.
“Fuck, yeah. Three times. If you want to get to four, though, I’ll have to begin soon. Maybe stretch.” He rolled his shoulders back, and then he lunged. I laughed and found myself on my back on the couch, his mouth on mine.
It took no time at all for him to bring me close to orgasm again, his hand between my thighs, rubbing me until I was panting, my hands on his back, wanting more.
And then he was sheathed in a condom, the sound of the wrapper an echo in my head, and I looked at him, trusting him more than I ever thought possible.
“Are you ready?” he whispered.
“I’m ready,” I whispered back.
And then he was inside me, stretching me to the limit. I could barely breathe.
This was everything. He was everything. But I couldn’t hold onto that, not right now.
I had to live in the moment. I just had to be.
But I could do this. This was what I needed. And I hadn’t even known.
We were on the couch, and he could barely fit. It didn’t matter because he was inside me, we were connected. And I wanted this. I needed this.
“You feeling good?” he asked.
“I feel everything.”
He winked and then kissed me softly.
“Me, too.”
And then he moved.
I moved with him, slightly unsure of what I was doing because it had been so long, but it didn’t matter. Because this was right. We were right.
I arched into him, and he slid deeper. We both moaned, his dick touching me in just the right place inside.
And then he moved faster, harder, pounding into me, his hands on my hips, keeping me steady as he pumped.
I played with my breasts, arching for him, and then I was coming, clamping around his cock. A breath later, he was coming with me, shouting my name, and then leaning over me, his lips on mine as he continued to pound, continued to fill me.
After, he moved to the side, bringing me half on top of him, and half to the side on the couch. Both of us lay there panting, his dick still inside me, my body still shaking.
“Wow,” Cross said, running his hands over my body.
“Agreed. Wow.”
“I may have to shave, or I’m going to end up giving you beard burn,” Cross said, slowly running his hands over my body again.
I tried to sit up, but it was hard when he was still inside. Instead, I pushed at his shoulder.
“What?” he asked.
“Don’t you dare fucking shave. You already told me you have beard oils and take care of your facial hair to the point where it’s cleaner than most people’s hair.”
“Of course. Germs. It’s gross.”
“Don’t you dare shave it. You put enough conditioner in there that it’s softer than my hair. You didn’t give me beard burn. And, I like the scruff.”
He smiled and kissed me again. “You like the beard?”
“Didn’t I just say that?”
“Then I won’t shave it. I’ll keep it, which is a good thing because I really like my fucking beard.”
I smiled and ran my hands over the facial hair in question, and then through his silky locks, and then down his body, coming to rest on his hips.
“Wow,” I whispered.
“I’m going to take that as a compliment. And if you’re lucky, I’m pretty sure round two’s on its way.”
My eyes widened, even as I laughed. Seriously? I didn’t know you could laugh during sex like this.
“Really?”
“I’ll need inspiration.”
And then his hands were on my breasts, his lips on mine, and I laughed again, savoring the moment.
I had no idea what was coming next, but right then, I didn’t care.
Because, somehow, I’d accidentally found this man, and I couldn’t wait to just live in the moment some more.
I’d heard forever only happened once, but that was fine with me because I wasn’t looking for forever.
I was looking for right now.
And I had found it.
The part of me that wanted more didn’t want to let go, so I ignored that part and decided to just be.
After all, I had to find my happiness, too.
And that was more than any forever I could ever hope for.
Chapter 12
Cross
* * *
This was it. This was the culmination of over a decade of friendship, and so many fucking issues that I could barely breathe.
I was finally going to end it.
The fact that it sounded like a relationship beyond what I had with Chris just told me that I had been in too deep with this business partnership and whatever friendship we’d had.
Because Chris wasn’t my friend. He hadn’t been for a long while, and the fact that I was just coming to realize that told me that I’d had rose-colored glasses on or my head down to the point where I was a fucking idiot. And anything that happened from here on out was something I would have to deal with.
I had talked with Liam and contacted a lawyer. We were going to dissolve the partnership, and I would see if I’d have to sue my former best friend.
But at the moment, I needed to make sure that we could talk for at least a few moments. I needed to ask him what the hell he’d been thinking. Chris wasn’t violent, so I wasn’t worried about that. And the accounts were locked down, so he couldn’t fuck up anything there. At least not any more than he already had. But I wasn’t going behind his back like he had done to me for so long. I needed to talk to him.
I had to make sure that I wasn’t the one without a soul after this.
My lawyer had advised me against going into too much detail, and that was fine with me. I just needed to talk to Chris. I needed to see what he would say.
I’d deal with the rest later.
I didn’t know what to do beyond that, but that would come.
Besides focusing on my failings at Chris Cross Furniture, and the fact that I actually still had work to do, I also had Hazel on my mind.
We’d had six dates. Six outings where I was getting to know her in every way possible.
I hadn’t been expecting her, and I honestly didn’t know if I should have expected her.
Everything about what we had was completely new to me, and I fucking loved it.
I was just trying to figure out exactly what the hell I was going to do about it.
With my professional life up in the air, going out with Hazel felt like a touchstone to me.
It also felt like, if I wasn’t careful, I could fuck it up and hurt her more than she’d already been hurt.
I didn’t know every detail of what had happened between her and her ex-husband. It wasn’t my right to know until she was ready to tell me. However, despite not knowing the details, I wanted to find the asshole and murder him
.
No, that was going a little too far. But I did want to kick his ass. How dare he hurt such a kind person? How dare he hurt anyone for that matter? I saw the shadows in her eyes when she spoke of him. How strong she tried to be as she rolled her shoulders back and pretended that she was fine. And while I knew she was better in every sense of the word she needed to be, there was nothing good about what the man had done.
But she trusted me. And that trust meant everything. I had the trust of my family, the comfort of knowing that no matter what happened, they could lean on me and vice versa in case the worst ever happened.
I knew that when Arden was sick, she could come to me. When Prior’s anxiety got to be too much, and he couldn’t laugh through his issues, he could come to me. When Macon didn’t want to talk but just wanted to sit and focus on what he needed to do, he could come to me. And when Nate kept his secrets, he knew he didn’t need to tell me. I didn’t need to know them unless he wanted to tell me. Regardless, he could and did always come to me.
My parents trusted me to be the head of the household when they moved away. And while I didn’t begrudge them finding new jobs and a life that worked for them, I also realized I was fine being who I needed to be for them. Even if I was still figuring it out.
Despite all of that, I didn’t know if I’d ever had anyone in my family truly see me as someone to lean on.
Hazel trusted me. She trusted me with where she lived, with her body, and maybe, if I got deep about it, her heart.
Hell, for someone who needed to have control and to be protective of everyone around them, the fact that she did that for me meant that I couldn’t fuck this up. I couldn’t be so focused on my work that I hurt her.
And I’d be damned if I ever hurt her. Thomas had hurt her physically and emotionally. That wasn’t going to be me. No matter what.
I didn’t know what would happen between us, didn’t even know what I wanted from the relationship. I sure as hell hadn’t been looking for her when we crossed paths, but it’d happened, and I wasn’t going to take it for granted.
First, however, I had to deal with whatever the fuck was going on with work.
The door opened to the building, and I muttered to myself, “Speak of the devil.”
“Cross? I saw your truck. You here?”
I had brought the truck because I needed to move a few pieces of equipment around, so I had parked in the back. Apparently, Chris had driven around the building, saw I was here, and parked in the front. Hell.
“I’m in my office.” I locked up my computer as well as all the files just in case, and then walked out the door.
What was I going to say to him? I honestly wasn’t sure. I didn’t have a plan in my head. Maybe I shouldn’t say anything.
But as I looked at Chris’s crisp shirt, his hands that hadn’t seen a piece of wood in months, hadn’t held a sander or varnish or anything having to do with what we did when we had built this place from the ground up, I wondered who the fuck this person was. And how I had let my own desires of making this place work tarnish the memory of what we’d had.
I really wasn’t good at relationships. I had told Hazel that before.
But I clearly wasn’t good at friendships either. Because I had ignored all the warning signs for far too long. And now I had to deal with the consequences. Consequences that had cost me way too much fucking money and time.
“Hey,” Chris said. “I saw you were here. Thought I’d stop by.”
“It’s working hours. Of course, I’m here.”
And you’re not.
Chris’s eyes narrowed. “Anyway, I have a couple of meetings today to figure out exactly what I’m going to do with this huge piece coming up. You know, the great commission?”
The lie? There was no commission. Just Chris wining and dining and trying to use our name to get money. It made no sense in our business. You actually had to create goods in order to get something.
“Anyway, I just wanted to see what you were up to. Anything you’re working on, on the side?”
Like pieces he could sell for me and make a large commission on? That wasn’t going to happen. But it had happened. A couple of pieces that I hadn’t done for a commission but had finished in the past. A couple of years ago, Chris had sold them for us because he’d had the connections. I hadn’t minded because I was working on the next thing, focused on my work. I had thought I had the receipts to know how much I’d made. I had been wrong. Chris had been stealing from me this whole time. And I had been too fucking trusting to actually realize it.
Or, I had actually believed the documentation and hadn’t noticed that it was fabricated. A legit lie.
The man had broken the law, and I hadn’t even noticed.
Who the fuck was I?
“No, I’m good. Working on projects that are already spoken for.”
“Too bad,” he said, and I narrowed my eyes. “Chris, we need to talk.”
He didn’t take a step back, but his eyes narrowed. “So I hear.”
“Excuse me?” I asked, tension running up my spine.
“I hear you went to a lawyer. You can’t even talk to me? No, you keep saying you want to talk, but you’ve got too small of a dick to actually lay it all out there. You want out of this partnership? Fine. I can see that you’ve never thought you could live up to what I can make anyway. But don’t you fucking think you can spread lies about me. That is slander. Libel.”
The two words did not mean the same thing, like Chris was saying, but I wasn’t going to correct his grammar.
Right then, all I wanted to do was punch him in the face. But I’d just told myself that I wasn’t a violent person. I couldn’t do that.
“Really, Chris? That’s the line you’re going with?”
“What? What other lines are there? You want to leave this business because you think you’re too good for me. But I’m the one raking in the big deals. I’m the one making art for celebrities. You’re just whittling in the corner for some mom and pop shop, wondering why the fuck you’re not living the life you should. I tried to throw you a bone, and you did nothing.”
“Throw me a bone? With that meeting? At 59th? Hell, you couldn’t even do that right.”
I let out a breath, trying to calm myself. “I seriously cannot fucking believe you right now. That was your client. And she canceled.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Because she knew she wouldn’t be able to work with you.”
“And that’s just a fucking lie. All you fucking do is lie.”
“No, you’re the one who lies to yourself. I’ve always been the better artist. I took pity on you because your name worked for what I wanted to do. But now? You think you can just walk away. Fine, we’ll make that work. You can walk away, but Chris Cross is mine.”
“No, that’s not how this works. That’s not how the partnership is laid out.”
“We’ll see what my lawyer says about that. Because fuck you and all the lies you’re spreading. Fuck you, thinking that you can do whatever you want and pretend that you’re anywhere close to my talent. I’ve always been better than you. I’ve always made sure that you had the little things that you needed to get things done. But you are nothing. You’ve always been nothing. You’ll always be nothing. I’m the artist. I’m the one people will remember. You’re just a guy with the weird fucking name and the big fucking family. You’re the one who takes too much time off so you can go take care of your sick little sister. Just because she married rich and doesn’t need you to take care of her anymore so she doesn’t die, doesn’t mean you can suddenly spend all your time here.”
I didn’t even know I had moved in front of him, my fist ready to slam into his face, until it was done. Chris’s nose crunched from the power of my punch, and I cursed.
Apparently, I was a violent man.
“You’re going to pay for that, you fucking asshole. Wait until you hear from my lawyer. You’ll be lucky if you’re not in a jail cell tonight. Asshole.”
&nbs
p; Chris stormed out, his hand over his face as blood poured down. I pinched the bridge of my nose, my knuckles aching, wondering what the fuck I was doing.
I had just hit a man. I knew the repercussions would come.
And, fuck, I now had to go to my house where Hazel would be. Have her see that, yes, I had just hit a man. There would be no hiding it, because my hand would be aching later.
I had hit a man, and she didn’t deal with violence well.
She shouldn’t have to.
I guess I deserved exactly what I got after this.
My hands shook, and I closed up the place, somehow making it to my house without throwing up or driving off the road.
Fuck. Knowing Chris, he was probably going to sue me. Or I’d end up in jail for hitting him. But the fucking asshole had talked about Arden. He didn’t have the right to talk about my baby sister. Nobody did, especially not a fucking asshole who was going to use her sickness for his own gains. But for what? To make himself feel better about himself? Fuck that.
Anger still coursed through my veins as I pulled into the driveway and cursed at myself again when I saw Hazel’s car there.
I pulled up next to her, and she waved, a smile on her face. I got out, taking deep breaths to calm myself.
“Hell, I’m late.”
“Actually, I’m early. There was like no traffic on 36, and I’m not exactly sure how that happened. But, here I am.” She leaned forward, kissed me softly, and I leaned into the touch, needing more.
She pulled back and looked at me, frowning.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“I don’t think you’ve ever lied to me before. But that was definitely a lie.”
Then she looked down at my hand, the redness on the knuckles evident because I had hit the guy pretty hard, and her eyes widened.
“What happened?” she whispered.
“I hit Chris. I’m so sorry.” Jesus, I was an asshole. I shouldn’t even touch her with these hands.
Her eyes widened, and she took my hand in hers, brushing her fingers over my bruised knuckles. It didn’t hurt, I had punched a punching bag enough that it wouldn’t, but the fact that she cared for me like this? I wasn’t sure exactly what to think.
Forever Only Once: A Promise Me Novel Page 13
