by J. L. Beck
When my feet are free, he straightens back up. Gripping the ropes around my midsection, he pulls me up with him.
“Enzo...” My voice is full of anguish. Mack’s dirty hand fists into my hair, pulling my face to his.
“Say another word and there’s going to be a fucking bullet in your head,” he growls.
“Get your fucking hands off her.” Enzo can barely get the words out, and though I want to look at him, I can’t. My heart’s already breaking.
“How about… Fuck. No!” Mack mocks and then points his gun off in the distance. His hold on my hair keeps me in place, and when I hear the gun go off again, I can’t stop the tears from coming. A sob rips from my throat as Mack starts pulling me away.
“I love you,” I cry out.
“Didn’t I tell you to shut up?” Mack shakes me, then bends down to pick up some duct tape. He rips a piece off with his teeth and slaps it against my lips. Tears continue to cascade down my cheeks. I want to say I love you over and over again since I’m certain this will be the last time I’ll ever see Enzo alive.
“Save your cries and begs for later. Where you’re going, they love to hear women scream. They feed off the tears you cry. Believe me when I say, if you thought Enzo was a monster, you’re in for a wild ride.”
Tears blur my vision, and cool air whips through my hair as Mack pushes us through the front door.
“You’re my ticket out of all of this.” He sounds gleeful, and all I want is to wipe the fucking smile off his face.
Picking me up as if I weigh nothing more than a feather, he opens the back of what looks like a van and sits me on the edge of the entrance, so he can open the other door. My mind skids to a halt as I realize this might be my only chance to escape. I pull my feet together, bunch up my legs as much as I can and push back as I kick at his face.
He stumbles back only slightly. Swear words fill the air. Trying to sit up, I push my legs up again to get another good kick, but he is faster, bigger, and stronger. His hands grip my legs as his face contorts in anger.
“You dirty fucking bitch,” he shouts as he shoves me further into the van.
Fighting with all my might, I push back, kicking and screaming.
“No!” I repeat over and over again, even though it comes out as nothing but a muffled noise against the duct tape.
His hands wrap around my legs, and his fist comes down hard against my cheek. My head snaps back, my vision blurs, and pain radiates through my face. For a moment, I’m so out of it, I can’t get a grip on what’s happening.
“If that doesn’t keep you down, then this fucking will.” His words cause my head to ache. I’m so confused. Where am I? What’s happening?
My mind is hazy, but I still feel the strong need to get away. My body is moving on its own, fighting to get out of this situation and away from Mack.
Before I can make it, I feel the prick of something in my arm. I look down and see a syringe sticking out of my arm.
Dread seeps deep into my bone as all hope leaves me. I’m helpless, scared, and so angry. I close my eyes and imagine Enzo holding me, keeping me safe while whispering sweet nothings into my ear.
That’s the last image I see in my mind before the darkness he injected me with consumes me.
24
Enzo
“Jared. Jared…” I scream into the phone. I’m on the verge of death. I can feel the blood seeping from every pore of my body, but all I can think about is Amara.
“Calm down, Enzo, just breathe,” Jared keeps repeating to me. Calming down is the last fucking thing on my mind.
“They have Amara. I fucked up. I fucked up so badly. They have her. Eli and I are shot.” My voice is growing weak with every word I speak. I should be saving my energy. I should be thinking about myself, but I can’t get the fearful look in her eyes out of my mind. The look I placed there myself. How could I be so blind and let Mack fool me?
I should have trusted her… I should have believed her.
“What the hell happened? What do you mean they?” Jared asks, his voice harsh and panicked. Could I even tell him what happened? I’m beyond ashamed. The way I’ve treated her. The way I let Mack play me… I trusted him and betrayed her.
“Fuck…” I hiss into the phone, trying to roll into a sitting position. Eli scoots across the floor and comes to sit next to me.
“What happened, Enzo? I left less than two hours ago…” Jared sounds astonished, and I realize I don’t care about explaining anything to him. All that matters now is that I survive, so I can kill Mack and get Amara back.
“Enzo!” Jared yells.
“Yeah,” I say weakly, feeling the life drain out of me. Fuck. I’m not going to make it. Eli puts pressure on the wound on my leg, which seems to be bleeding the most.
“Lie back down,” he mutters and pushes on my shoulder. I don’t normally take orders, but I do this one.
Jared is not going to get here fast enough, and I’m going to die. I’m going to meet my fate at the hands of one of my most trusted men.
“Stay with me, dude, stay with me.” I can hear Jared’s pleading voice but can’t force any more words from my mouth. It’s as if everything around me slows down. Jared’s voice sounds like a playback on a walkman out of batteries. The words become slower, more drawn out before they seem to get further and further away.
Then random images pop into my mind. Memories of my mother, father, and Amara filter in and out. Like a slideshow on repeat. A ray of colors shows behind my eyes as if they were the moon, sky, and stars on a dark night.
I force Amara’s image to stay. Focusing on her smile, her beautiful eyes, and the way her slender fingers dance over the piano when she plays.
Amara… she needs me. That thought snaps me out of it.
“Mack…. It was Mack…” I’m barely able to get it out before the world starts to grow darker again.
“Lorenzo, you’re not allowed to fucking die on me, do you hear me?” It sounds as if Jared is screaming through a long tube. By the time his voice reaches my ears, it’s muffled and hard to understand.
“Since when do you give me orders?”
“Lorenzo, you listen to me. You have to stay alive. You have to kill Mack. You have to get revenge….” My eyes sting as I try to open them. My body feels hard and stiff—as if a load of bricks is piled on my chest. I know I need to keep my eyes open. I know I need to keep thinking and hold on to hope, but the darkness calls to me.
“Enzooooo…” That is the last word I hear.
The last image flashing behind my eyes is Amara and the look on her face when I let her down.
Three weeks later.
My body aches badly as I throw my legs over the side of the bed. The cotton sheets feel soft against my skin—soft just like Amara. I have to shake my head to get the memories to leave my mind.
“You’re too weak to be getting up and moving around,” Jared says, interrupting my thoughts. I look up from the hardwood floor to his face. He is unshaved, his eyes are dull, reflecting no light at all, and I’m sure I look the same… maybe even worse. It’s been three weeks since I last saw Amara, since I last touched her. Since I allowed Mack, the fucking snake, into my cabin. Just thinking about it causes my blood to boil and the sharp pain in my chest to flare up.
“Funny, last I checked, you didn’t have a medical degree,” I retort in a smart-ass tone while adjusting myself. My leg is still fucked up, and trying to move it hurts like hell, but nothing compared to the anguish I feel when thinking about Amara.
Leaning against the door, he smiles at me as if he finds what I’ve said funny, when really, I’m just trying to be an asshole.
“You don’t need a medical degree to know you should be lying in bed. Resting. Cooling off. Staying hidden.” In one whole sentence, he names four things I would rather not be doing.
“No,” I hiss out as a burning sensation flows through my leg. “I would rather not just lie here while Amara is out there and that fucking asshole h
as her. I would rather do anything but sit here and hope and pray for something good to come from all of this.”
“Hoping and praying won’t do shit in this situation, but going into something without a plan won’t help either. Do you want to put yourself in the line of fire again?”
“I don’t care what you say. I’m doing this my way.”
“Of course you are.” Jared shakes his head. “I’ve sent some men by John’s house again. Still nothing, no sign of him.”
Anger slithers through my body. That fucker is hiding while his daughter is missing, making him look even more guilty than before.
I keep my eyes trained on the floor as I attempt to stand for the first time in weeks. My body is worn and tired, but at the same time, it’s begging for a release of energy. Urging me to get up and move around. Nothing Jared says is going to stop me from doing what needs to be done.
I’m slightly hesitant to stand. It hurt like a bitch lying down, so I’m sure it won’t be better standing. But, I have to start somewhere. I push myself up slowly, attempting to put the majority of my weight onto my good side. Once I’m ready, I shift weight to the other side, ever so slowly.
“I swear to fucking god, you have a death wish, Enzo. A death fucking wish,” Jared mutters under his breath angrily.
“No death wish, Jared,” I hiss out between clenched teeth as a burning sensation radiates up my leg. It hurts, but not as bad as I thought it would. “I have a need for revenge. A burning, all-consuming rage to have revenge on Mack; to get Amara back. Sitting here in this fucking bed, not getting better, not moving, and allowing myself to think about it more just adds unneeded fuel to the fire.”
In my rant, I don’t even realize I’ve come to stand on both feet while holding the side of the bed. Releasing a deep breath, I let go of the sheets and stand by myself. Glancing up at Jared, I watch him walk over to me—waiting for me to fall to the ground.
I’m not used to feeling weak, to needing someone. If anything, the need for help just makes me angrier. I’m coping with the shit that went down. I’m simply waiting it out until the moment I can sink my knife into Mack’s flesh.
“Amara needs you, Enzo. She needs you to come and save her, wherever the fuck she is, but she also needs you to be strong and healthy because, without those things, you’re useless to her. If you go barreling in there without a plan, without being fully healed, you become a liability.”
Fuck. Running a hand through my hair and down my face, I allow a sigh to release. As much as I don’t want to admit it, which is a lot, Jared is right.
“You’re right, but Amara, she needs me.” I’m struggling with my next words because I’m still not sure about where Amara and I stand.
She told me she loved me, but that was in the midst of her being taken. In the midst of me dying. The fact remains, I almost killed her. Fuck. All I know for certain, even after everything that happened, is that I love her, and when I find her, I will give her the freedom she deserves. I will protect her for the rest of her life, even if it kills me to protect her from myself.
I was so lost in my own shit-storm, I didn’t notice Jared placing his hand on my shoulder. I turn my head, glaring at his hand. I know it is just a gesture of reassurance, but nothing would assure me she was okay—at least not until I had her in my arms.
“I know you love her. There isn’t any reason for you to say it out loud. Just know if you don’t get yourself healthy, you will be useless to her and to me.”
My eyes leave his hand and lift to his face. He’s looking at me as a friend. Talking to me as a friend, not as my employee. I know why it’s because we were friends. Always have been, so was Mack. I don’t trust people for a reason. Trusting Mack got me into this situation. What if trusting Jared pushes me into my own grave?
“You know nothing about love or my love for her. I will get better, and I will find her. I will kill Mack. Then, I will move on with my life, never thinking back to this moment,” I growl, so angry with myself and with Jared. It’s an irrational thought because Jared has done nothing wrong.
I catch a glimpse of a smile crossing his face and if I wasn’t in the condition I’m in, I would wipe the floor with his face.
“You’re so right. I know nothing of love. Nothing about it,” he says, taking a couple steps back as he heads for the door. “I can tell you love will only get you so far. If you love her as much as you say you do, you will heal. There is no way Mack will kill her—you and I both know it. He took her for a reason.” Jared’s trying to reason with me like I’m a child, and I force myself to continue to stare at the wood grain on the floor.
“Eli called earlier. He is following a lead, trying to figure out where Mack is hiding,” Jared says.
Mack shot Eli too, which pissed him off royally. Luckily, the bullet that hit Eli went straight through and didn’t hit anything vital. The fucker was out and about a week after he was shot.
“Good, at least I have someone out there looking for her.” I know Eli is not doing it for her; he is out for blood because Mack betrayed us, betrayed him. Either way, Mack will lead us to Amara, so I’m thankful for Eli being out there.
“All of your men are looking for her,” Jared points out.
“You mean the few men I have left?” I say bitterly. Between killing Luccio, Mack’s betrayal, and me disappearing, my empire is crumbling. Men left me, not trusting I was fit to lead them anymore. Only the most loyal men stayed. “It’s not enough. I should be looking for her.”
We are in Jared’s home and everything in it represents him. I’ve said it before, and I’m sure I’ll say it again, he is right. Gritting my teeth, I force out the words I’ve never said to anyone. “Thank you… for helping me. For not giving up on me.” I lift my face, my eyes landing on a photo on the wall. It’s one of him and his mother before she was killed. Just like mine.
He looks similar to her. Dark hair and eyes. Beautiful as ever. I try to think back to how he started working for me, but it’s been so long, I don’t even remember how it all started. All I know is that he is one of the good ones, and to be caught up in this mess isn’t fair to him. I owe his family more than that.
“Enzo, get better, get the girl, and be happy. You have nothing to thank me for.” He completely dismisses me and turns around to walk out of the room to leave me be.
As much as I think being alone is the right thing, it feels wrong. Thoughts of Amara come rushing to the surface, and I wonder what she’s going through. How much longer can she hold on? Is she even still alive?
It’s those thoughts that remind me how much I love her. I will do whatever I can to save her, and then apologize to her for my actions. I refuse to allow her last memories of me to be of the evil monster because, though it may be true, I’m also someone else. I’m a lover, and I love her.
“How does your leg feel?” Jared asks as he sets a bowl of soup in front of me. It’s been a few days since I started walking around again, and I’m just getting used to moving around more and more. My muscles ache, and sometimes, I feel like I might collapse, but then I think of Amara and all she must be going through.
“It’s fine,” I respond, dipping my spoon into the broth of the chicken noodle soup. It smells delicious, and my stomach growls in approval. Though I was hungry, a tinge of guilt burrows into my mind, and I drop the spoon into the bowl. I can’t eat, not knowing what is happening to her. It doesn’t matter what was said or what had taken place. The way I treated her… There was simply no excuse. I should’ve known better.
“You don’t have to feel guilty about eating,” Jared chimes in. I can’t force myself to look at him. I don’t want him reading my thoughts. I am supposed to be the King, the man who runs everything with an iron fist. Instead, I run nothing. My empire has crumbled, and everything that meant the most has been stolen from me.
“It’s not guilt,” I lie. I’m on the verge of losing my temper again. I’m tired of being caged, being told what to do, and how I need rest. What I n
eed is Amara… safe and happy. I don’t care about anything else.
“Well, that’s a crock of shit.” He laughs, setting his spoon down on the table. I don’t know where to go from here. There is nothing I can say that would help. I need to take action.
“Call it whatever the fuck you want. I don’t care. I need to figure out a plan, then I need to implement it because I will get her back, and I will gut Mack. No one lies to me and gets away with it.” Simply admitting he had pulled the wool over my eyes angers me. It makes me feel weak in the eyes of my people, and I’m not weak.
“Whatever. Do what you need to,” he says, frustrated with me. I can’t blame him. I’m frustrated with myself.
“Have you talked to Eli?” I ask, trying to change the subject.
“No,” Jared lowers his voice. “I haven’t heard from him, and he is ignoring my calls.”
“Great. Either he is dead or found a new alliance.” It’s hard not to be bitter about it. I grit my teeth so hard my jaw hurts.
“There is someone else I talked to. Matter of fact, he is going to come by today.”
“What the fuck, Jared?” I bark at him. No one is supposed to know where I am.
“I know, I know.” Jared waves his hands at me like that’s gonna calm me down. “I should have asked you, but I didn’t think you’d mind–”
“Who?”
“My dad. I called him this morning to ask for help. I didn’t think he would at first, but when I told him what happened, he agreed to help right away. It’s kind of odd, to be honest, but he said he has to tell us something in person. It’s about Amara.”
“What the hell does your dad know about her?”
“I don’t know.” He fishes his phone out of his pocket and looks at the screen. “We’ll find out soon though, he is on his way.”
