“Twice you pressed closer when I touched you. Last night on the couch and just now outside, you pressed my palms deeper into your skin before you removed them.” He went completely still. Staring. Called out and put on the spot. Good. Now he knew how I felt. “I don’t know what your deal is, but you do like to be touched, or at least you do when it’s me doing it. So you lied to me, and you’re lying to yourself if you believe that shit you told me. So I don’t trust you. I’m going to Karen for help. The end. It’s over. Whatever this is.”
As I had continued my tirade Ash’s gaze had narrowed and narrowed and narrowed further. I backed up as he came stalking toward me. He wasn’t mad anymore. He was furious.
“The hell it is.” He stopped an inch away from me, his body overshadowing mine, the heat of his irritation palpable.
“Did you not hear what I just said?” I whispered.
“I felt it. Every word. Like the fucking slap you meant it to be. But don’t you want to know why.”
“Why you lied?”
“Yeah.”
“Do tell.”
He pressed his hand to my belly. He walked me backward until he had me against the wall. Then he slammed his other hand beside my head and moved in even closer until I barely had room to breathe.
His gaze moved up my body from where he was touching me to my face. “Because I like you way more than I should allow,” he announced huskily.
“What? I don’t understand. Why shouldn’t you allow yourself to like me?”
“Because you deserve better.”
“That’s almost as cliché as its not you it’s me.”
“That works, too.”
“Let me get this straight. You couldn’t admit that you’re attracted to me so you thought it would be better to lie to me and hurt my feelings the way you just did because you think I’m too good for you.”
“The last thing I wanted to do was hurt your feelings, little one. It’s just that you make me forget myself…”
“Me? A nobody in borrowed clothes with a beat-up face, made you…a rich famous rock star…temporarily lose his mind because why? Because you were overcome with passion?”
“What if that were the truth?” He dipped his chin.
“But it’s not, is it? That’s just a bunch of bullshit deflection. The truth is you’re in love with someone else.”
His eyes flared. “Who told you that?”
“I heard you talking to Linc that day you chased me through the woods, and I’ve seen you with Simone. I know that you’re in love with her. But that doesn’t justify you lying to me, even if I am a nobody with nothing.”
“You don’t know jack.”
“But,” I clipped.
“How about you telling me what the hell is going on with you? Who you really are? Who you’re running from? Then I’ll straighten out all that convoluted crap you think you know.”
“You truly have no idea?” I bristled inside of my cage. “Even after all those hints I laid out today?”
He searched my features. A change came over him. Something flickered in his gaze. I swallowed as he withdrew his hand from my belly and lifted it slowly. He slid his fingers along my jaw line framing one side of my face. His eyes dipped to my mouth as he swept his thumb across my lips. My heart started to pound. “It can’t be,” he breathed. I couldn’t answer. Every part of my body was locked tight. His gaze left my mouth but only to follow his hand as he slid his rough fingertips along my smooth cheek then over my ear and higher until he encountered the edge of the beanie and removed it from my head. He drew in a sharp breath noting the ruby regrowth. His eyes hit mine. “It is. Little Rose.” He skimmed the palm of his hand lightly over the red fuzz. He made a keening sound as if mourning the loss of my curls. “Fanny Bay. Fanny Lesowski?”
“Bingo,” I confirmed.
“No.” He pulled back. “Fucking no.” He withdrew one step then two. Cool air rushed in to replace his irresistible heat, but my heart beat faster than it ever had before when I noted his expression.
Shut down.
Closed off.
And his eyes weren’t angry anymore. They were glacial blue.
Chapter Seventeen
Fanny
I suddenly didn’t want to know why he had never shown up at the coffee house or returned any of my texts.
After his prior rejection, this latest response had given me all the answers I could handle.
I hugged my arms around myself to ward off the chill.
“Let’s take this conversation to the other room. To a more formal setting so I can focus. And I think your sister should be present.”
I nodded, but he didn’t see it. He was already turning the corner into the kitchen by the time I got my feet unstuck from the floor and took the same path he had down the short hall.
1. Be brave, Fanny.
2. Hollie needs you.
3. Focus on that.
Spine snapped straight, fingers tightly clenched at my sides I kept my gaze straight ahead and moved to where Hollie stood in the living area ignoring Ashland and the clinking of glasses in the kitchen.
“You told him who you are.” A statement from my sister this time, not a question. She reached for my hand prying apart my fingers to thread hers into mine. “And he reacted like that?” Her gaze shot to the Dirt Dogs drummer then back to me. “Yikes. I’m sorry, Fanny.” Her grip tightened.
“Sit.” Ash joined us, inclining his head toward the dark chocolate leather couch behind us. We sat. His expression wasn’t just cold anymore, it was ominous. He held two lowball glasses a quarter inch full of amber liquid. “Take one.” I reached for the tumbler he offered me skittering my gaze away from his as soon as it connected.
“What is it?” my sister asked. “I don’t want any. I’m underage. I’m just asking for Fanny. I think you’re scaring her.”
“She should be scared. I don’t even know where to begin. I can only guess how bad things really are, and what’s involved if she felt like the streets were the best option for the two of you.” He lowered himself into the easy chair opposite us, knocked back his drink and then scooted forward his knee nearly bumping mine. “Drink,” he insisted, his unyielding gaze on me.
“I don’t think…”
It’s scotch, not poison, Fanny.” The first time he’d addressed me in nearly two years. It should have thrilled me. Instead the way he said it looking at me the way he was looking at me right now…well, I suddenly needed a stiff shot of something strong.
“Alright.” I took a measured dose that warmed my throat and chest considerably before I leaned forward and placed the heavy glass on the oak coffee table.
“Can you explain what you were thinking running around the streets of OB alone at all hours of the night?”
“I wasn’t out all hours of the night.”
He narrowed his gaze. “It was past two when I found you and brought you here.”
“Ok yes that time it was, but…”
“Truth or lie?”
“Truth but…”
“And where was your sister that time?”
“The sub-pump structure by the pier.”
“Alone?”
“Yes, but…”
“Not cool. Not safe at all. Is that where you two were sleeping?”
I nodded.
“Oh fucking hell no.”
“I don’t have to do this with you.” I started to stand. He grabbed my arm
“Sit down,” he ordered.
“Karen,” I sputtered.
“I’ll let you explain everything to her in good time. For now, you talk to me.” He scrubbed his face. I sat back in my seat, crossed my arms over my chest and glared at him.
“You can’t turn me to stone with a stare, little one.”
“Doesn’t mean I’m not going to try,” I huffed.
“Here.” He took my beanie from his pocket and tossed it to me.
“Can’t stand to look at me like this, huh?”
“No,
Fanny. The things I said earlier to you about the way you look were the fucking truth. But you’re shivering. You lose a lot of heat from your head. Would you like me to get you a jacket?”
“No,” I pouted. “I’m fine.”
“You’re far from fine. You could have been killed. Both of you could have.” He let out an exasperated sigh. “You’re a real pain in the ass, you know that, right?”
“I’ve been called uglier things than that by men worse than you, I assure you.”
“I believe you. Recently, I’d bet. I can’t even begin to imagine what you endured out there.” His expression softened. “This has something to do with your stepfather, right?”
I nodded. “What is he saying?”
“What do you mean? I have no idea.” He gave me a blank look.
“In the press,” I prompted. “The last we saw he was offering a reward for our return. I’m sure he’s telling all kinds of lies about us to the media.”
“Why would he do that?” Ash asked.
“Because of me. Because he wants me back where he can control and manipulate me.” Hollie had an odd look on her face as she chimed in. “You’ve got no idea about any of this for real?”
“No, I don’t. Why should I?”
“My sister’s a big deal,” I explained.
“In what way?” he asked.
“She’s an actress. They call her Holliewood.”
“Oh. I don’t watch movies.”
“She does television, too. She had a miniseries that was really popular with her demographic. A reboot of a famous eighties movie.”
“I don’t watch TV, anymore, either.”
“Yeah, I noticed you don’t have one.” Hollie shook her head in disbelief. “Or a computer.”
“I stopped paying attention to all the celebrity stuff a while back.”
“But you run a record label. Don’t you need to be on top of all that? Spot trends? Do trailers for movies, commercials, video games, that kind of thing? Wouldn’t it put Outside at a big disadvantage not to have the big picture of the entire entertainment industry?”
“I’ve got little interest in the propaganda and agendas of the LA scene. I prefer to keep myself isolated from all of that. Linc and I had a conversation along these lines when we first formed the business. He handles that aspect of things. I focus on the music.”
“Still it’s weird not to watch TV any or movies,” Hollie decided. “Eccentric.”
“I’ve been called worse things.”
I smiled at his clever return. I couldn’t help it. And you had to admire someone who did their own thing their own way. “So you really don’t know anything about Hollie?”
“Not anything more than what you’ve told me.”
“Or me? Or about our stepfather looking for us?”
“I stopped keeping tabs on you about the same time you no doubt started hating my guts for standing you up that day.”
“Oh. Alright.” I didn’t know how I was supposed to measure that since I had never hated him.
“I still don’t understand why you’re hiding from your stepfather.”
“I guess we might have to start at the beginning. Do you have more liquor?”
“I do.” He grinned. And despite knowing I didn’t rate with him, it took me a moment to get my brain functional. He was just that handsome, and his smile was beyond phenomenal.
“My mother met Samuel when I was five. She had a role in one of his films. They got married shortly after. She was pregnant with Hollie at the time. Hollie and I always assumed she was Samuel’s daughter, but we don’t think that anymore.”
“Why not?”
“Because he told me himself that he wasn’t the night Fanny and I took off,” Hollie offered.
“He was drunk,” I explained. “Or he probably wouldn’t have let that truth slip.”
“He’s always drunk.”
“Not always, Hols. Not in the beginning when he and mom first got married. They were happy for a while.”
“Until the affairs,” Hollie said. “Until the confrontations about the affairs.”
“That sounds like a shitty environment to grow up in.” Ash shook his head.
“It was,” I affirmed.
“And that was before it got worse.”
“After your mother died,” he guessed.
“Yeah.”
“And we know now they argued the night she died,” Hollie added. “They were on his yacht. He told me she insisted that he stop fooling around. He told her he would when she stopped pining over another man.”
“My father,” I said.
“Who was he?”
“I never knew his name. She was secretive about his identity. I only suspect that he was one of the workers on the oyster farm. She did the cooking for the men and women who maintained the beds.”
“On Vancouver Island?”
“Yeah,” I answered. “I’m named for one of the bays there. Hollie’s named after one of the oyster companies. We think that might be because of who our father was.”
“On the yacht the night they argued,” Hollie explained. “Mom told Samuel she would always love Fanny’s father, and she admitted she had been pregnant with me before they had met. That Fanny’s father was my biological father, too.” Hollie and I exchanged a heartfelt look. We had always loved each other completely, unconditionally. But we both liked knowing we shared that additional bond.
“Wow.”
“Yeah.” Hollie nodded her agreement to his assessment. “The revelation didn’t go over very well with Samuel. The police report only says our mother slipped, hit her head, fell overboard and drowned.”
“But now we know that it might have been more than an accident. And looking back we both realize his behavior became more erratic after her death.”
“A friend of mine figured out he’s been siphoning money from my accounts.” My sister twisted her hands.
“Plus he came onto Hollie.” I reached over and stilled her hands, covering them with my own. “Then he threatened her when she refused to sign new paperwork that would have extended his guardianship and his control of her financial accounts past her eighteenth birthday.”
Ashland let loose a string of curses that blistered our ears.
“Yeah, he’s a sick bastard. And a dangerous one. When Hollie told me what happened I came and got her. We were hoping to slip across the border and lay low in Mexico until she turned eighteen and we could get access to her funds. But my bag with our cash and our fake passports got stolen.”
“That’s why you were on the streets.”
“Yeah. We’ve been stranded here in OB ever since.”
“So you don’t want your stepfather to find you because knowing what you know about him and the night your mom died, you’re afraid what he might do to keep both of you quiet?” Ashland guessed.
“That’s basically it, yes.”
“You were right to be afraid, smart to get her out of there immediately. But since then your decisions have been completely asinine.”
Chapter Eighteen
Ashland
“I did what I had to do.” Her chin rose, and her eyes blazed. “What I thought best to protect my sister.” She was so incomparable flashing her flames of silver fire at me. I should have realized right away who she was. I’d never seen eyes as beautiful as hers before or since we first met. But this wasn’t the same girl I remembered. Back then she’d been confident if a little nervous with me. A rising star, or so I’d thought. Not this half-starved, beaten down, nearly broken girl.
“No one’s questioning your loyalty to Hollie. But your fear for her made you act irrationally. Why not tell someone what you knew? The police for starters.”
“People, even the police, can be bribed and coerced. You still don’t get it, who my stepfather is and what he’s capable of. Everyone else knows he’s one of the most powerful men in the entertainment business. But I shouldn’t be surprised you don’t know given the way you isolate you
rself up here in your penthouse like Quasimodo in his bell tower.”
“I’m better off far from all the shit in LA.” My spine stiffened. “It’s all fake fuckery and contrived happy endings.”
She cocked her head to the side studying me and weighing my words. Had I given too much away? Had she discerned how much of my disengagement from that world had to do with her? She had an uncanny ability to take the little I revealed and fill in the blanks with surprising accuracy.
You pressed deeper into my hand…
Even a lie intended to shield rather than hurt hadn’t gotten past her.
“I don’t have to have my finger on the pulse of Hollywood, the town not your sister, of course,” I let out a breath, “to know your stepfather’s not all powerful.” This wasn’t about me. Best to get her off that tangent. This was about her and doing the best I could to get the mess she had made of her life cleaned up. The sooner I did, the sooner she and the temptation she represented would be gone. Out of sight out of mind once more. At least that’s what I told myself.
“I’m gonna need to make some phone calls. Find out what’s going on. See what I can do.”
“I don’t need you to do anything. I can take care of myself.”
“Yeah, you’ve been doing a fine job of it.”
She frowned.
“That was harsh. But just from the little you shared it sounds like you very much need someone with a level head and resources on your side.”
“Fanny,” her sister cautioned. “You have to admit it. He’s right.” It was worth noting that the seventeen-year-old seemed to be the more sensible one.
“But Hollie,” her brow creased, “we don’t know…”
“You don’t trust me. I get it. You’ve made that abundantly clear. I find it ironic given the magnitude of your own deception right here under my nose.”
“I… but…it was necessary,” she sputtered.
“Give it a rest, Frances.” I could feel the tension snapping like a taut line between us. “A lie is a lie, right?” Only that wasn’t exactly true. Some sins couldn’t be pardoned. Like my own. “Justify your deception in your own mind if you need to. I might even have extended you the courtesy of listening to your explanation at another time.” My frown deepened as did my concern over the predicament she found herself in. “For now I need to get started on finding a solution.”
Oceanside Page 13
