by Ella Brooke
I frowned and pulled at my cuticles. “I’m pregnant.”
“And I knew it!” Alan shouted as he slunk like the weasel he was into my green room. “Juliet, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll scurry now.”
Juliet nodded and patted my back. “Kid, you’ll be okay. I promise.”
She must have set a land speed record rushing out of there and leaving me utterly alone. I grabbed my robe and pulled it tightly over me, as if that would help hide how poorly the costume fit me now that I was showing even the tiniest bit.
“And this was another reason I didn’t want my star performer getting friendly with Ryker. That man has a reputation.”
I swallowed and rubbed my belly. The terry cloth of my robe felt soft and comforting against my palm, as if it were the only thing that could keep me grounded to the reality around me. The shit reality where everything in my life had been yanked out from under me in no time flat. Three days ago, Ryker and Ian and I had been almost like a family, and I’d been certain he’d be excited about the babies. That he’d love them like I already did.
Now I had nothing.
Now I had Alan’s smug face looming over me.
“I just…things changed so fast.”
He reached out and touched my belly. I let him even though every instinct I had revolved around the urge to slap his damn palm away. My belly wasn’t public property. Besides, he was only doing it because he knew it added that extra bit of humiliation to my dilemma. That was exactly what Alan relished in life.
“They did. How far along are you, Savannah?”
“Two months. I…they’re triplets.”
“Oh my,” he crowed. “Well, you know the contract, and even if I hadn’t heard you right now, I already suspected. The stomach sickness, the way you were getting so damn fat.” He shrugged and finally removed his hand. “Well, you know the rules. You know exactly every word of the contract you signed.” He smiled broadly. “You’re fired. Lilah’s the new Green Fairy, and you, Savannah, are nothing at all.”
Tears burned in my eyes. Funny, I’d thought that night after I’d caught Ryker cheating that I’d cried out every tear I’d ever had. But they were back again, hot and heavy in my eyes.
“I…”
Alan shrugged, his hands moving with all the regular flourish that he’d practiced over the years as an emcee. “You’re done, Savannah. Now get the hell out.”
***
“I’m a failure.”
My voice was small, tired, and weak. It was everything I was at the moment—defeated and beaten down. I was such a cliché or like even an extra cliché: that pregnant woman with no job and no husband…no signs even of a boyfriend. If I were eighteen and not twenty-eight, I’d be an afterschool special. Now I was just a statistic and not a good one.
My head was pillowed on Mary’s lap. She’d rushed home from her job at the pawn shop when I’d broken down over the phone with her during my ride home. She’d even charged the Uber since I hadn’t been thinking clearly enough to drive all the way across town to get her. It was a miracle I hadn’t crashed while crying the twenty blocks home. I was lucky to have my sister by my side. If I had to have these babies by myself, I didn’t know how I could do anything alone.
She stroked her fingers through my hair, her nails touching my scalp and tickling it. It was like when we’d been kids and we’d taken turns rubbing each others’ backs when Mom had stumbled home drunk. It had always been us against the world before Samson or Ryker or any of the jerks Mary had dated either.
Now it was us against the world but with three little people extra.
“I can’t believe this. I…what are we going to do?” I hiccoughed. “I know you love Vegas, but I honestly don’t know how we can afford to still keep living here.”
“We knew that had to be coming.”
I hiccoughed again and rubbed at my nose that was congested with my crying. “I hoped Ryker could help us out. Mare, we were so close…we were going to have a family again after so long.”
She leaned down and kissed my forehead. “Sis, we’ve always had us. We’ll figure this out, promise. Besides, I wrote to Aunt Ellen. She was very understanding, always said she felt crappy that Dad ran out so early. She has a big enough place in Manhattan for us.”
I blinked. “What does she do?”
“She actually was injured years ago in a car accident and took the insurance claim money to buy a rent-controlled apartment. It’ll be tight when the babies are in the office in cribs, but we can make it work, and it takes rent off our shoulders. There are pawn shops in New York. I’m sure I can find a place to work, maybe actually get to manage my own place after all those years working under that oaf Joey. Besides, you always wanted to be on Broadway, didn’t you?”
“Not eight months pregnant with triplets.”
“You won’t be pregnant or nursing forever. I think we’ve maxed out Vegas. We’ve been here our whole lives, and it’s time we went somewhere else.” She squeezed my shoulders. “Besides, putting over two thousand miles between you and Ryker Eden will be the best thing for you.”
“Definitely. I just can’t believe Aunt Ellen will help us.”
“She’s older, wishes she had family too, I think. Never had any kids.” My sister sighed, and I could hear the way her voice waivered. “I’m so sorry, Sis.”
“What for?”
“I told you to go for it, to date Ryker. I thought you could have fun for once.”
After all the pain in my life, it felt good to burst out laughing. Rubbing my belly, I sighed. “I think I had a little bit more than just fun.” Sitting up, I looked directly at my sister. “You’re not at fault here. There’s no fault.” I rubbed my stomach again for emphasis. “Besides, I wouldn’t have the kids if it weren’t for taking a chance. I can’t ever resent that. Not to mention you’re right.”
“About what?”
“I am definitely going to have one hell of a story to tell anyone who asks!”
***
The apartment was huge by New York City standards. It had a good sized galley kitchen, a small living room big enough to accommodate a real couch, and then three side rooms—Aunt Ellen’s bedroom, the room with twin beds that Mary and I were going to share, and an office that would be a tight fit as a nursery, but if we got small cribs, would just make it as a place for the babies. Tears were pricking the corners of my eyes when I stepped into the apartment, carrying the couple suitcases that contained my belongings. It was like being a refugee in my own life. But as I stepped side-by-side with my sister into the well-maintained apartment, I felt just a little more confident, like I could survive.
Setting down my suitcases, I sat down on the twin bed under the window. Looking out, I could see the cars barely moving and honking like crazy at each other down 42nd Street. We were far from the theater district but still on the same street I’d thought about all my life. It made my body thrum with energy, and I promised myself that I’d audition again, be on stage again in a few years after the babies were born and old enough for daycare. The last thing I was going to do was let a jerk like Ryker Eden spoil every dream I had, especially when I’d meant nothing to him.
“This place is awesome!” Mary said. “I wish we’d known this was an option back when we were scraping by in Vegas.”
“I do too.” God, how I did, especially thinking about those double shifts I’d pulled the first couple of years with a fourteen-year-old in tow.
My aunt came to stand at the doorway, her smile beatific and beaming. She didn’t look like us. We took after Mom, I guessed. I honestly didn’t remember Dad well enough to know what he looked like. But Mom was short and curvy like me and Mary. Aunt Ellen was tall, easily five-nine barefoot, and had short blonde hair she kept in a pixie cut above her neck. Her outfit consisted of black slacks and a plain, white, button down blouse. It was a look that complimented the sleek, modern aesthetic of her place.
“I’m sorry I let you girls down then. Honestly,
I was so checked out for a while. I’d been pulling the cougar game with a younger husband. I was selfish…the last few years I’ve been reaching out because after my divorce, I realized the thing missing in my life was family.” She strode across the room and slipped onto the mattress beside me. Then, she wrapped me up in a tight hug. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you girls needed me the most. I promise that I’ll be able to make it up to you.”
I swallowed hard, grateful that I had somewhere to go. This was the first time in forever it felt like I’d had a maternal figure. I wasn’t sure how it was going to go, what it would be like to get to know my aunt over the next few months, but I was happy at least here. I had my aunt and my sister. Soon, I’d have my children and a fresh start in the city I’d always dreamed about. No. It wouldn’t be as good as the family I’d dreamed of having with Ryker and Ian and all of us. It would never be quite that good.
But it was more than I’d ever had a right to hope for.
More than I could have imagined when that rat Alan had fired me.
“Aunt Ellen, trust me.” I rubbed my belly. “I know about making mistakes. I also know a lot about believing a guy’s bullshit.” My brow wrinkled up as I remembered both Ryker and Samson. “In fact, I know how that feels more than once.” I leaned into her hug. “If you’re here now, then that’s what matters.”
She nodded and looked toward Mary. “I have cable with five hundred channels and a fully stocked fridge. Can you give your sister and me a few minutes to talk about everything, and then we’ll be out and heading to do some shopping? My treat, of course. We’ll start getting a few cute baby clothes and stuffed animals. The office could use a personality!”
Mary winked. “I’d say with the three babies on their way, the office as the new nursery is going to have three whole personalities to choose from!”
She skipped out the door, and I had to laugh at her resilience. Mary was like that, always believed things would work out. It was what made her more adventurous with dating and in life than I was. Maybe it was because I’d protected her from the really hard stuff when Mom had left, maybe it was because she just had a different personality than I did. Either way, Mary was bouncy where I was wounded. I admired that so much about my sister.
After the door was shut behind her, my aunt regarded me with serious green eyes. “How are you really?”
I rubbed my stomach again and leaned against the wall. “I’m over two months pregnant with triplets, sick all the time, and the man I thought I loved—the one who really mattered to me—turned out to be as big a jerk as the only other boyfriend I ever had. God, I sure know how to pick ‘em.”
My aunt nodded and pushed a strand of hair back over my shoulder. “Maybe that’s just the curse of the Riley women. I never had any good taste in men, either. Probably why I ended up an old maid.”
“You’re not that old.”
She winked at me. “I haven’t told you my age yet, and I have a fabulous moisturizer. However, it’s not just you. I can’t imagine the pain you’re in now, sweetheart, but you and Mary and the triplets have a home here as long as you want. But, I honestly have to ask: Are you sure there’s no help for you and the father? Mary says his name was Ryker something.”
“Eden,” I corrected. “Ryker Eden.”
My aunt’s eyes went wide. “The gambling app billionaire?”
“You know him?”
“I know the gossip pages, and he used to be all over them. I didn’t realize that was the father. He has a bit of a reputation.”
I hugged myself and nodded. “It’s earned. I caught him with some leggy giraffe supermodel in his lap. She had her tongue halfway down his throat. I just…he showed me this side of him with his son and all these family outings long before I suspected I was pregnant. I thought I really knew him.” Tears welled up again as I thought of the way he’d looked up from between my legs that night, that reverence in his eyes. “It was all just a lie, Aunt Ellen.”
“The triplets…I saw what not having a father can do to kids. I see it with you and Mary, just from the letters she sent at Christmas time to me. Are you absolutely sure you can’t even tell him? Maybe he’ll change for the babies.”
“And maybe I could reroute the ocean with a spoon. Some people are lost causes, and Ryker Eden is one of them.”
“All right, but if you feel you need to reach out to him, don’t stay stubborn. Forgiveness is important. I know it feels amazing you and Mary gave me that.”
I squeezed her hand. “You weren’t chasing supermodels behind my back.”
“No, but he’s the father, and I think he could surprise you.”
Sighing, I rubbed my belly one last time. “That’s exactly the problem. When it comes to Ryker, the biggest surprises aren’t good ones.”
“Then,” she said, standing up and helping me to my feet. “…when we get a cab, we’re going to stop by this divine ice cream shop I know because if anyone has ever deserved a cone full of chocolate, it’s you.”
“I agree. At least chocolate can always pick up my mood.”
My aunt winked. “You’re definitely a Riley girl.”
“I know,” I said, crossing into the living room. I was almost to the couch when a stabbing pain in my back made my knees buckle. “Oh, oh God.”
My sister was on her feet then, rushing over to me in a flash even as my aunt slipped her arms under my armpits to help try and keep me from falling to the ground. “Savannah! Are you okay?” My sister was screaming at me, and I’d never seen her so scared.
I tried to say something…anything to make her happier, but I couldn’t. The minute I opened up my mouth to speak, another stabbing pain attacked my abdomen. My heart sped up, and I felt my palms grow sweaty. My babies. Jesus, no, not my children.
“I…I’m fine. I guess it’s just kicking.”
Aunt Ellen shook her head. “You’re not far enough along for that.”
“I…ouch, it hurts!”
Mary helped cradle my hips, and between her and my aunt, they barely kept me from falling to the floor. When my sister spoke, her voice was shaking so badly I could barely understand her. “Aunt Ellen, I’ve got her. You have to call 911.”
“Why?”
“Because she’s bleeding.”
That was the last thing I knew before I passed out.
Chapter Fourteen
Ryker
“Daddy?” Ian asked as we drove up to my sister Melanie’s apartment.
“Yes, kiddo?”
“I’m sad that Savannah didn’t come to the museum with us.”
“I’m sad too,” I replied as we pulled in to park at Mel’s place. “But we had a good time on our own. We always have a good time, you and me and sometimes with Aunt Melanie and Uncle Davis.” The fact I was able to keep my voice level and not just scream obscenities was a testament to my acting skills. I wanted to throttle Davis by the fucking neck for everything he’d cost me, but Ian still adored him, and my son had lost too many family members already. “Besides, maybe Savannah will come back.”
Ian sighed and pulled his backpack on silently as he hopped out of the car and ran ahead of me to Melanie’s door. I charged after him with heavy footfalls, knowing that his heart was broken all over again. I wanted Savannah back. God knew I wanted my siren back more than anyone else in the damn world. But she’d been screening everything I’d done for her. I’d sent baskets and flowers, given her a million calls and emails. I’d half considered driving to her apartment myself, but I wasn’t sure if she’d just call the cops on my ass or not.
But nothing I did made a dent. Everything was either screened or sent back return to sender.
I was well and truly fucked and not in the good way.
Slouching into my sister’s place, I shuffled my way to the couch and flopped onto it. Ian was already in the guest room, setting himself up for the weekend. I had an investor gala I had to be present at as the main face of the company, or I’d have kept him by my side all weekend.
His life had been dealt another blow, a maternal figure in his life snatched away again, and I’d done that.
Poor kid.
Melanie shut Ian’s door and sat down beside me. Smiling sympathetically, she handed me a cold beer from the fridge and started sipping her own. “You looked like you could use it.”
Gratefully, I took a deep sip of the Guinness. “Understatement of the year. I fucked up. I didn’t even fuck up, Mel. Damn Davis had some attitude about me dating a burlesque dancer, as if he hasn’t done a million things way worse.”
“But he doesn’t date those girls, just has sex with them. I hate it, but I can see how in Davis’s twisted logic that a ‘pump and dump’ is fine, but dating just a dancer would be beneath him. He has this weird mix of frat boy and snob mixed up together. Also, he can be kind of a dick sometimes.”
“Yeah, he can.”
She took a long draught of her beer. “But he meant well…or I think he did in his idiot way. He loves you, but he had the one hundred percent wrong idea that setting you back up with Bella would do anything but fuck your life up and break your heart all over. I think he sees that as his fuck up the first time around because he introduced you. He seemed like he was ham-fistedly trying to fix it.”
“I didn’t want it fixed. I just wanted Bella out of my life. I think throwing her to the curb a week ago finally got the message across. I haven’t heard from her or had her sneaking into my house. Davis has called a few times, but I haven’t felt like speaking to him. I will, but I just am so glad he’s in Canada working on the acquisitions there. I’d probably punch the dumbass in the face. Repeatedly.”
Mel shook her head. “I can’t say I blame you, but I do hate to see my big brothers fighting. Dad’s so busy all the time with his own stuff, and after Mom…”
“I know.
“We’re what we’ve got. I’m just saying after you make it up to Savannah, you have to find a way to patch it up with Davis too.”
