by N. R. Larry
At some point, it had started to rain. Normally, the patter sound of the drops against the roof calmed me. In that moment, they only provided more water for me to drown in.
“Reynard of Oceanus,” she said.
“I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on that day, and I suspect Reynard has been in partnership with the king for quite some time.”
“None of this explains how why I don’t remember any of this.”
It scared me how calm I was, removed from the situation. I was like someone watching a man’s life as it was about to fall apart.
“That brings me to why I came to see you in the first place.” I pulled a marble sized orb out of my pocket. I had found it among the things Violetta had brought days ago. “HOH Labs loves to bridge science and magic. We harvested the photophores of firefly squids and combined them with a basic conjuring spell. We created many prototypes. The one that was successful could rewrite memories. HOH Labs wanted a tool to aid PTSD victims.”
I stopped and pressed my lips together. My tongue tightened. It was as if my own body didn’t want to produce my next words. “It was the only thing I could think of. So—” The memory flashed in my head. Her, collapsed in my arms. Babbling about conspiracies. “I gave it to you.”
Something pressed down on my shoulders. My limbs felt heavy. The truth, as humans liked to say, was not setting me free. I felt trapped in a cage of her silence. She didn’t move. She didn’t speak. Her stillness sank me further and further into a place I didn’t want to go.
“And,” she whispered. “You never told me.” With a sniffle, she added, “You let me go all this time… Not knowing. You let me—” She stood so quickly that my heart jumped into my throat. As she paced she waved her hands in front of her as if she were trying to wash away what I’d told her.
If I had one wish in that moment, it would be that she could.
“You let me cast a dangerous spell. An unnecessary spell.” She came to a stop and stared at me. Her expression was blank. I expected anger, but somehow, that emptiness in her eyes was worse. “Oh, Marlowe. What have you done?” Her features crumbled, and she covered her face. As a reflex, I leaned forward, but froze.
I had no right to comfort her. I was the source of her pain.
Slowly, she swiped her hands down her face. I expected tears, but there were none. She stared at me, shaking her head. Then, she tiptoed toward me. Her expression was guarded, and her muscles were tight. She reminded me of someone approaching something that might be dangerous. “Marlowe.” She stopped when her legs pressed against my knees. “Do you love me?”
My chest tightened. The look on her face made me feel like a see-through man. All my insides were on the outside where anyone could see. I swallowed hard and nodded, trying to push the words off my tongue. “Of course, Zarya.” My hands trembled. I started to reach for her again.
She sucked in a sharp breath. “You just—don’t believe in me.”
Her words dropped bricks onto my chest. It was hard to breathe. Her eyebrows furrowed, and the emptiness in her eyes was replaced with loss and sadness.
“Zarya,” I said, finally finding the strength to lean forward. “Tell me what to do. I know I can make this right.”
She surprised me by nodding. Then, slowly, she crawled into my lap and rocked her hips toward me. Tingles raced up my legs. She took my hands and placed them on her hips.
Leaning forward, she pressed her lips against mine, hard. The air rushed out of my lungs. I clawed my fingers into her back and lifted myself to meet her. She parted my lips, and her tongue was rough against mine, her kiss, savage. I clamped a hand across the back of her neck and pulled her away. “I thought I was protecting you. That’s all I’m ever trying to do.”
She stared at me with an expression I couldn’t read.
“You believe me, right?”
Reaching behind her, she moved my arms and ran her hands up and down them. Green light sparked from her fingertips. Every inch of my skin buzzed with lust. Her bottom lip quivered, and for a moment, I thought she was going to cry, but then her expression hardened. Her gaze homed in on me. I knew that look.
My cock hardened right away. She slammed my hands into the back of the couch and leaned forward, sliding herself up and down on top of me in a way that scooted my shorts down my legs inch by inch.
“I don’t understand,” I whispered, trying to keep my voice even.
A growl like noise rattled her lips. “Me either.” She dug her hand into the outside of my thigh. “Take these off, she moaned. “Take them off now.”
With shaking hands, I slid my shorts down my legs, and then kicked them away.
“Mm.” She rocked against me. “You still haven’t taken to wearing underwear.”
Normally, I would have engaged in our usual banter. But, something about her felt different. Something had changed between us. She ran her hands up and down my cock and I froze under her touch.
“You have such a beautiful dick.” She swiped her hand up and down the length of me. My breathing grew heavy. I massaged my hands into her thighs and pulled at her clothing.
“Take it off,” she said. “I don’t want anything else between us.”
Gripping the fabric of her dress in my fist, I ripped it away in one fluid movement. She was bare. I ran my hands up her stomach and teased the tip of her nipples. They hardened under my touch. She gasped and rocked her hips faster. Her stomach tensed. I pulled her closer, flicking my tongue against her nipples.
She moaned and fell against me, wrapping her hand around the back of my neck. Her breath was warm against my ear. There was nothing but her. The feel of her smooth skin against me. The way she moaned and squirmed. It was magic.
I wrapped my hand around the base of my cock and rubbed it against her folds.
“Lowe,” she whispered.
I smacked myself against her clit. She hissed and nibbled at my ear. I wanted her more than the first time we were together. I couldn’t speak—could barely breathe. My dick bulged in my hand. Each time I rubbed myself against her, she got wetter.
“Stop,” she moaned while still rubbing her clit against the tip of my cock. “I want you to come inside of me. I want you, Lowe.” She pressed herself against me like someone afraid. “Please, I want to feel you.”
I clenched my jaw. The need. The vulnerability in her voice made me dizzy. With a grunt, I slid myself inside of her.
She rocked her head back and groaned, running her fingers through her hair. I started to cup her breasts, but she pressed herself back against me, resting her head on my shoulder and moaning in my ear.
I surrendered.
We moved together. The room filled with hard breathing, and the slick, wet sound of me moving in and out of her. I curled my toes with how good she felt. I ran my hands up and down her back.
“You’re so wet,” I muttered as she rocked against me. “You’re so, perfect.” My eyes rolled back in my head, and I tensed, slowing her down to hold my orgasm off. I wanted nothing more than to explode inside of her, but more than that, I wanted it to last.
“It’s okay.” Her voice was an irresistible whimper. “I’m so close. Please.”
I grabbed her by the back of the neck and smashed my mouth against hers as I rocked in and out of her, faster, increasing speed as her groans intensified. The walls of her pussy began to tighten around me. I dug my hands into her hair and thrust into her deep, then pulled out. She wrapped both arms around me and clung to me, screaming my name, shaking, as I made her lose all control of her body.
“Yeah,” I grunted. “Come for me, Zarya.”
She huffed. “I’m going to come.” She rocked her head back. “Oh, gods. I’m coming.” She stopped rocking on top of me. Her eyes rolled back into her head. I leaned forward, and pushed myself in as deep as I could, while flicking a finger across her clit.
Her hand slid down and clamped over mine. Then, she shook and tightened around me. She gasped, and then flopped forward, digging
her fingernails into my shoulders. She tightened around me one last time and a warm tingle rushed up my shaft, and then shot through the rest of my body.
We came at the same time. Hard, and like never before.
“Lowe,” she whispered against my ear. “I love you. Did you feel how much I love you just now?”
I rubbed my hand up and down her back. I swallowed, my eyes half closed, and nodded. “Yes, Zarya. I love you too.”
She squeezed me and then whimpered. “That’s why I wanted to say goodbye.”
I froze. For a period of time that amounted to forever, I sat there, wrapped up in her. About an eternity later, I opened my eyes, and pushed her away to look at her. “What?”
With a sniffle, she pulled away. Tears were streaming down her face. Something cold and final wrapped around my heart. I didn’t know what was happening, not entirely, but I knew that it was going to rip me apart.
“I said.” She swiped the tears off her cheeks and stood. “That’s why I wanted to say goodbye.”
I blinked. The meaning of her words crashed into and out of my skull. I couldn’t make sense of them. “Goodbye?” I furrowed my eyebrows. “What do you mean, goodbye?”
Her expression changed. There was no emotion in the angles of her face. There was nothing but hardness in her eyes. “I can’t trust you.” Reaching out, she snapped her fingers. Her wrist band buzzed. Seconds later, her trident was in her hand. She pointed its glowing edges toward me. “Which is why you have to go.”
My mind went as blank as her expression. There had to be an explanation. She wasn’t writing me off. Not after everything, not when she needed me the most. “My priestess.” I stood on shaky legs. “We can get past this. I had the best intentions. I only wanted to protect you.”
Bluish-green light sparked in her eyes. Her lip curled up into half a smirk. “Do you really think I need your protection?”
My mouth gaped open. She inched toward me, staring a me with a look I never would have guessed she could house for me. I felt small and hunted. I felt like I was nothing.
“Zarya, please. Don’t—” I rubbed my fingers into my temples, trying to keep myself together. “Please, don’t do this.”
“I’m not doing anything, Marlowe.” She slammed the bottom of her trident into the floor. The prongs sparked, and then lit up with crystal blue energy. The light danced toward her and fluttered over her heart. Then, the line of energy drove itself into me.
Into my heart.
It took me a moment to figure out what she was doing.
As soon as I did, my heart beat horror into my blood. “No.” I shook my head, and then tried to go to her. The magic held me back. Her gaze was dead when she stared at me.
“Marlowe of Atlantis.” She whispered the words and yet they boomed in my ears. They became the only thing that existed. Tears burned at the back of my eyes. I was too shocked to let them fall. “I sever your tie to me.”
“Zarya.”
The light of her magic pulsed, burning bright. I held my hand up to shield my eyes from the glare.
“I banish you back to the hole you crawled out of.”
With that she sliced through the magic bond that connected us. I don’t know if I screamed. All I knew was pain and loss. She stepped through the light and pressed her weapon against my neck. Then, she backed me up until we were standing by the portal.
There was so much I wanted to say. That I loved her. That I lived for her. For Atlantis. She leaned over and traced her signature into the metal. The door crawled open. The sound of rushing water crashed into my ear drums.
She looked up and stared at me. For a moment, I thought she might say something. Then, her eyes hardened. She pointed her trident at me. It shook in her grasp.
“Goodbye, Marlowe.” She swallowed. A bolt of magic shot out of the end of the trident and smashed into my chest.
I flew backward, into the water. The portal door slammed shut, and I sank.
I was empty.
It was dark.
I let go of everything and prepared for the worst kind of death.
The kind you lived through.
16
Zarya
The moment he was no longer a part of me, I regretted my decision. A sob I’d been holding in for what seemed like a lifetime rocked my shoulders. He fell into the water, and when the portal closed behind him, I fell to my knees. My scream rocked the entire house. Sparks of magic shot out of my eyes, from the tips of my fingers, and through my wrist bands, knocking down pictures on the walls I’d never looked at and fancy glass figurines I was never impressed by.
Footsteps pounded down the steps. Jett’s shadow fell over me. “Zarya?”
“Stand back,” Conway mumbled from somewhere behind me.
A golden spark rushed out of my trident. I held it tighter. “I take it back,” I cried, knowing the words held no meaning.
Above me, Jett let out a howl of pain, then muttered a few choice curse words.
“Zarya,” Conway said. “You have to calm down.”
Crawling forward, I tried to trace my signature into the metal again, but my hands were too shaky to do so properly. “Damnit!” I punched the door, leaving a heavy dent in the middle. Leaning back on my heels, I gripped the hair above my forehead. “What have I done?”
Hot tears fell from my eyes. When they splashed against my naked thigh, they were black.
“Zarya,” Conway said again, before a low boom of thunder rang out. “You’re going to bring this entire house down.”
Jett muttered something I couldn’t hear, and Conway laughed in response. “You’re the only one who can do anything,” Jett finally said. “I suppose I can shift and wrestle her into submission.”
There was a heavy sigh. The floor rattled beneath me. I knew I was out of control, but I didn’t know how to suck all that pain back inside. Two black bolts shot out of my wrist bands.
Jett dropped to the floor, his hands over his head to act as a shield. “Conway!” His voice boomed inside of my ears. “Do something, now! Or I will eat you.”
There was a low hiss. Then, something calm and cold slithered up my back. Not magic, but the power of a siren. My first instinct was to fight him, but I knew that if I didn’t let him stop me, I would send some very powerful, dark magic out into the world.
His call settled behind my eyes. My body stopped shaking. Slowly, I slid onto my back. Conway stepped into my vision, his steely gaze locked onto mine. “Zarya, what happened?”
I opened my mouth to answer, but no words would come out.
“You banished the brain,” Jett spat. “I don’t feel him anymore. What the—”
Conway cut him off with a glare. Slowly, his power began to pull back. I turned away from them and onto my side. Conway’s chill left me completely then, and I sucked in a deep breath. No more magic sparked out of me. I was back in control. My heart still felt like it might stop beating and fall out of my body, but I’d have to live with that.
I’d have to learn to live without a part of me.
I set my jaw into a hard line and stood. “He couldn’t be trusted,” I said in a low voice. Then, I told them everything Marlowe had told me. For several long moments, the three of us stood in total silence. Clearing my throat, I started toward the stairs. “I need to dress. Wait here.”
“You made a mistake,” Jett muttered.
Without turning around, I paused, my hand on the banister.
“I’m not as smart as the nerd,” he went on. “But even I can see we don’t exactly have many allies here. Not only that, Lowe knew how to plan things. I mean, I’m trying to think of a plan he ever had that went wrong, and I can’t seem to.”
“He betrayed her trust,” Conway said in a voice brimming with doubt.
Jett snorted. “He was protecting her. Zarya! You have to see that.”
I stared up to the second floor.
Jett scoffed. “You keep making hot-headed decisions like that, and you’ll be standing against
a mad king by yourself.”
I dug my fingers into the wood. There was a snap, and the two ends of the banister fell inward. They stood behind me, muttering things I didn’t try to make out. Finally, I turned around slowly. Conway and Jett were hissing out some argument, but then turned to look at me, as if they could feel my gaze on them.
Flicking my tongue against my bottom lip, I said, “If either of you wishes to leave—” I darted my gaze toward the dented, portal door, and then looked back at each of them. Without waiting for a response, I turned and continued up the stairs. I considered the possibility that Jett was right as I opened my trunk and stared down at its contents. There was a possibility I’d acted rashly, which wasn’t me, but once the connection had been severed, it couldn’t be undone.
I sniffled and reached into the bottom of my trunk, pulling out a flat, silver box. Engraved on it was a trident, along with the magical symbols of my sacred circle. Before my eyes, Lowe’s symbol, the conch, faded away, as if it had never been there. In its place, an empty circle burned into the surface. I ran my finger over it and forced myself to accept what he had done, and in turn, what I had done.
Emotions tried to eat at me, but I batted them away. “I don’t have time for this.” Snapping open the lid, I peered down at my suit. It was a green, scaled material, that covered every inch of my body like a second skin. It was fashioned to be the most functional in the water. I ran my thumb across the material and it lifted toward my touch.
As I stepped back, the suit wiggled to the floor, crawled across the carpet, and attached itself to my ankles. I closed my eyes as it worked its way up, sealing in every inch of me so that I was covered, and yet uncovered. It stopped below my neck. I stretched my limbs, flexing my fingers and curling my toes. Then, I reached in the trunk and removed my tiara, and finally my trident, which I flicked in the air so that it extended to its full length.
