by Shayla Black
When he reached her, she was waiting. Their mouths melded. She felt so small but vital in his arms as he turned and carried her to the bed, then laid her across the middle, in the spill of silvery moonlight beaming through the window.
Braced above Raine, he looked down at her. Watched. Stared. She blinked up at him, lips swollen, eyes shimmering with devotion.
Hammer didn’t flinch or dilute the importance of the moment with a wolfish smile or wry smirk. Instead, he bared himself without removing a stitch, allowing her to see inside him, all the way to the bone.
To his soul.
He could barely fathom how he’d managed six years without showing her his heart. How would he ever survive the next thirty? He’d come to need Raine, to depend on the fact she was right beside him. He’d simply believed that she always would be. The utter shock that he might be the one leaving was almost more than he could bear.
Macen trailed a knuckle down her cheek, brushed his thumb over her bottom lip. He gazed into her questioning eyes. She wore every emotion she felt on her sweet face. He could read her so easily. She wanted to be everything to him, wanted to give him whatever he craved.
Somehow, she didn’t realize she already had.
“Tonight, I need your love far more than I want your power,” Hammer whispered against her lips. “Take whatever you want. You don’t need permission for anything.”
Her breath hitched. Raine took hold of his face. “I want all of you.”
“I’m yours. I have been for longer than I could even admit.”
Without a word, Raine sat up and unfastened the buttons of his shirt, pushing it off one shoulder, then the other, kissing the skin she uncovered with a gossamer press of her lips. Then she unfastened his belt, toyed with the button of his slacks. With a beseeching stare, she tempted him, igniting tingles not just in his cock but all over his body. As his zipper fell with a hushed purr in the room, goose bumps broke out across his skin. Usually, he was in control of everything. Now he couldn’t even control his breathing. He’d never felt anything like this wonder, the sense that her next touch could both soothe his need and wrench his heart.
Hammer suspected those weren’t the only new and foreign sensations she’d bestow on him tonight. He was ready and oh-so-fucking willing to drink them all in.
The neon numbers on the bedside clock flashed blue in the shadowed room. He was shocked to see that hours had passed since the O’Neill family departed. How could it feel as though he and Raine were cocooned in some perfect, timeless bubble while wondering if, at any moment, it was about to burst?
Raine skimmed her fingers over his chest, dragging a nail softly around his nipples, into his navel, before pushing his pants past his hips and freeing his shaft. Macen forgot the clock. Instead, he drew in a deep breath and let it out as he followed her every worshipping caress. The beast within him didn’t even rouse, as if knowing the man couldn’t survive anymore without her love.
“I never get tired of touching you,” Raine murmured. “The feel of your hard muscles beneath all that smooth, hot skin.”
He sucked in an agonized breath as she tempted him with skimming palms and grazing lips. “I melt every time you touch me.”
A tingling trail of awakening flesh spread until he swore his heart would split wide open.
“Take your pants off,” she murmured, nipping her way up his shoulder, to his neck, pressing her lips to his jaw.
God, he didn’t want to move, just stay and bask in her reverence and love.
Why had he never known how much pleasure a woman could give him when he wasn’t commanding it?
Because he’d never let anyone ever have this sort of power over him.
For Raine, he stepped back. An involuntary groan of protest left his chest, but he kicked off his trousers and returned to the bed, hovering on his knees above her, just waiting.
She smiled as she ate him up with her gaze. She had the definite advantage since she remained fully dressed. Hammer found their role reversal ironic, but he didn’t care. He simply closed his eyes and memorized the feel of her soft, smooth hands claiming every part of him.
When she tongued her way up his abs and circled his aching cock with her fingers, Hammer’s hips bucked. She was undoing him—as she always did—but this experience was remarkably different. For a man who prided himself on control, she was unraveling him faster than a spool of yarn.
Surprisingly, he kind of…liked it.
“Raine, baby, I want to feel your skin. I have to kiss you all over.” He didn’t demand that she strip, and he didn’t tell her that he intended to peel off her clothes. He simply started removing them.
He wanted it to take forever.
Hammer tugged at the hem of her bright pink T-shirt, nudging it over her belly, smoothing it up her breasts and over her head. He eased to his feet, helped her up in front of him. Wrapping his hands around her waist, he felt for the snap and zipper of her little skirt. He released them and guided the garment down her hips. Her bra fell away next under his deft fingers. With a smile, he palmed his way down to cup her baby bump.
“I’ve changed.” She bit her lip.
“You’re beautiful. You look even more like a woman now. Like our woman.”
She was so exquisite, so petite and delicate compared to him and Liam. It was a wonder they hadn’t broken her. She was far more resilient than either of them in some ways. She’d be an amazing mother. Of that, he had no doubt. The changes in her body were more evident with each passing day. Something else he would miss. Another ache he couldn’t soothe away.
Because he couldn’t resist another minute, he dropped a kiss on her lips. But his brush turned into more. He sank into her, drowned in her, falling deeper and deeper…
Goddamn, he’d miss her. Every sigh, every scream of ecstasy, every panted wail, every giggle and laugh, every fighting word, and every fucking tear she cried over him.
When Hammer eased back to drink her in, he saw heartbreak lining her face.
She sucked in a ragged breath. “Mac—”
He seized her lips again, stealing her words. He didn’t want to talk about her future that probably wouldn’t include him and refused to waste another second mired in regret. He wanted to merge his heart and soul with hers and carry those priceless pieces of Raine with him for the rest of his days.
Her lips quivered under his. Macen felt her warm, wet tears roll between them. Melancholy gripped him. Hammer blocked it out. Nothing and no one would spoil their remaining time together.
Cupping her nape, he gently slid inside her mouth. Sweeping over every valley and swell, he sighed as their tongues joined in a slick, exalting glide.
As he eased back to nuzzle her cheek and anoint her with tender kisses, tiny sobs escaped her throat.
Hammer’s heart disintegrated. He’d finally confronted his ghosts, convinced himself that it was time to begin his life again…and now? He might lose everything.
Not without proving how much she means to me.
Thumbing the wetness from her cheeks, he shook his head. “No tears, precious. I’m giving you more power over me than I’ve ever voluntarily given anyone in my life. I want to commit every second of this night to memory. Will you do the same?”
Raine sucked in a shaky breath, then drew his palm to her lips. Pressing a kiss to the center, she placed his hand over her heart. “Tonight, tomorrow… I’ll carry you here with me forever, Macen.”
Her bottom lip trembled, but Raine kept herself together for him. She wrapped her hand around his neck and pulled him to her lips. Hammer went willingly, stroking the softness of her naked flesh, absorbing the feel of her as she lavished all her love on him. When she traced her tongue along the seam of his lips, he opened for her, letting Raine explore as she’d done for him.
Growing bolder, she circled her hand around his wrist and brought his palm to her breast. He obliged her desire and raised his other hand, kneading her heavy orbs, thumbs skimming her hard nipples. She ga
sped into his mouth and arched into his hands.
“I need you, Macen,” she murmured.
“I need you, too.”
Kissing her senseless, he pulled her to the mattress with him. She was shaking, and he brushed the hair from her face with the softest caress, then kissed her again, savoring the slickness of her lips and tongue. He couldn’t seem to get his fill of her. Dragging his mouth over her jaw, he inched lower, nipping and laving the sensitive flesh beneath her ear.
She wrapped her arms around him and dug her fingers into his flesh, her nails little pinpricks in his back. He shivered and his cock jerked. He wanted to spread her wet folds and drive himself inside her. Instead, he swept his tongue lower still and captured a sweet, ripe nipple between his lips. On a blissful sigh, she lifted her shoulders from the mattress, offering herself to him. Hammer took his time, languidly bathing both breasts in liquid heat until Raine whimpered, writhed, and moaned.
The air around them thickened. Heat and demand grew urgent.
Still, Hammer had no intention of rushing these tender moments. Raine was too special, too rare, too important. Her mewls and pleas set him on fire, but it was a different kind of flame than he’d ever felt. Hammer wondered how he’d gone through life without ever knowing this mind-altering ebb and flow of unbridled passion. Until now, he hadn’t understood that with someone he loved, he could give her his power and she’d surrender everything back to him tenfold.
When he lifted his head, he saw her face glowing with love—pure, raw, and true. His heart clutched. His body trembled. “I could stay here, lost inside your eyes until the end of time.”
“Do it,” she moaned. “Stay with me. Forever. Please.”
He never made promises he couldn’t keep. He wasn’t going to start now. He loved her too much to lie.
Macen swallowed back the pain rising inside and kissed her softly. “I’ll stay with you as long as our forever lasts, precious. You have my word.”
“Our forever will never be long enough.”
He nodded and pressed his forehead to hers. “Then we’ll make every fucking second count.”
Raising his head, he shifted his weight. Supporting himself above her with one hand, he reached between them and gripped his ready cock. In silent entreaty, Raine parted her legs.
Open.
Inviting.
Unprotected, she exposed her whole heart and soul to him.
As he stared down at her, she looked like every man’s fantasy. She’d always been his.
Raine was the most beloved gift life had ever given him. She was perfect. From the inky hair spilling over his white pillow to her delicate pink-painted toes, and every sassy, strong-willed, tender-hearted part in-between.
Everything about her took his breath away, always had…always would.
With his gaze locked on hers, Hammer sucked in a shuddering breath. “Forever, precious.”
“Forever.” Two fat tears slid from her eyes.
A bittersweet smile tugged the corners of his lips as he aligned his crest and slowly pushed past her wet folds. Inching himself into her swollen core was as close to heaven as he would ever get.
Gazing into her tear-filled eyes, Hammer worked himself in, little by little, as Raine clutched him to her tightly. She clung as if she’d never let go. Hopefully, neither of them would ever have to.
Hammer seated himself inside her. Raine’s breasts rose and fell as her smooth walls enclosed him in her heat, her very being. He withdrew from inside her with the same painstakingly slow rhythm, watching her lips part and sensation play across her face.
“You’re so fucking beautiful.” Hammer wanted to weep.
“You make me feel beautiful. Alive and loved. Oh, Macen…” Raine breathed as she wrapped her arms around him.
Hammer buried his face in her neck. With both hands, he gripped her petite curves and settled her onto his thighs, driving himself deeper inside her. He gently gripped her waist, then slowly eased her up and down his shaft. She cupped his cheeks and kissed him, melting her mouth against his.
Encased in their own self-made bubble of perfection, their whimpers and groans filled the air in a song of passion. Their tongues entwined and their bodies swayed—the physical poetry of their love. Slowly, sensually they ascended to the stars, disintegrating and fragmenting into brilliant bursts of raw, erotic beauty.
Boneless, spent, and thoroughly sated, they remained coupled together. He held her in his arms as aftershocks rippled through them. Hammer vowed that he would spend the next forty-two days loving and caring for her, mark himself indelibly inside her to keep his memory burning within her like a flame.
It wasn’t enough. It would never be enough—for either of them.
Hammer stifled his anguish, closed his eyes, and pulled Raine in even closer. As he combed his fingers through her hair, she drifted off to sleep. As he listened to the rhythmic sound of her breathing, he savored the softness of her skin, the feel of her warm, lush body against his, the combined scents of their lovemaking.
When Liam slipped in the room and smiled at them entwined, dropping a kiss on Raine’s still-flushed cheek, Macen shared a smile with his best friend. And for the first time in his life, he felt well and truly whole.
Chapter 14
Tuesday, February 19
* * *
Hammer hadn’t been this anxious since his first day of boarding school. Sitting in the waiting room in the office of Raine’s ob-gyn, surrounded by women—some who already looked forty weeks pregnant—Macen wanted to climb the walls. Raine skimmed her thumb over his knuckles, trying to soothe him. Would he be a nervous wreck when Raine was ready to deliver? Hell, would he even be there when that time came? The thought of missing out on the birth of their child sent him spiraling downward.
Don’t go there, fucker.
After the evening he and Raine had spent making love, he’d succeeded in shoving down his fears—until now. He’d also held tight to the feeling of completeness he’d discovered then. From the moment he’d awakened this morning, he’d done his best to focus on appreciating every second of his freedom with the two people he loved. And now he’d be hearing their baby’s heartbeat.
Later, he knew he’d have decisions to make.
But no way would he let dread or what-ifs spoil this moment.
Two chairs down, Liam leaned in to kiss Raine’s cheek. Foreheads pressed together, they shared a hopeful, intimate glance. And when she turned to him in silent question, he couldn’t leave her wondering whether he was excited to hear the first signs of their growing child’s life. He caressed her belly and smiled.
Around the room, he could feel gaping stares, even outright hostility from other expectant mothers. He ignored them. No one was ruining this for them.
“Raine?” An older woman clutching a chart and wearing bright blue scrubs called as she held open a wide door.
Both he and Liam leapt to their feet and extended their hands to Raine. She placed her fingers in each of their palms and stood, excitement evident in her exhalation. “It’s time.”
“Wow,” a woman murmured as they passed.
“Maybe one is a friend and the other is the father,” another woman speculated in a whisper that carried around the room.
Raine turned back to the busybodies. “No, they’re both my men and the fathers of our baby, not that it’s any of your business.”
Hammer couldn’t help but chuckle as Raine clutched his and Liam’s arms proudly and sashayed toward the nurse. She didn’t even look back to see the jaws dropped in shock. The stunned gasps from the two judgmental twits said it all.
“You go, girl,” another expectant mother cheered her on as they passed.
A wide grin speared Liam’s face.
Once they passed the nurse waiting for them at the portal, Hammer leaned in to murmur in her ear. “You’re bad. I like it.”
“I can’t take you two anywhere,” Liam teased.
“Me? What the fu—heck did I do?” H
ammer amended his language in the mostly female-inhabited, baby-friendly office.
The nurse laughed and motioned Raine to step on the scales. After she slipped off her shoes, they watched the number appear on the digital display.
“Are you having trouble with morning sickness?” asked the nurse. “You’ve lost four pounds.”
Hammer and Liam exchanged a glance. The stress and chaos in their lives right now had impacted her and their baby. He wished like fuck he could put a stop to it—for all their sakes.
“No,” Raine replied. “I just don’t seem to have much of an appetite.”
Hammer sent her a scowl for lying.
“We’ll start force-feeding her if we have to,” Liam assured.
“I have no doubt.” The nurse shot Raine a knowing grin. “You’re lucky. Some women don’t have one man, let alone two, helping through their pregnancies.”
“I bet it’s really quiet at their house,” Raine joked with a saucy grin. “And they do less laundry.”
“That comment is going to cost you… later,” Hammer whispered in her ear.
The nurse pretended not to hear as she took Raine’s blood pressure and temperature, then led them to an examination room. Hammer’s replacement phone—the feds had seized his—vibrated in his pocket. He ignored the call and helped Raine onto the table.
Hammer had never been in an ob-gyn’s office, but he knew exactly what sort of apparatus this was. Toying with one of the stirrups, he glanced at Liam. “One of these would be great for the dungeon at home, wouldn’t it?”
His buddy nodded. “Think of the possibilities.”
Sidling to the foot of the table, Liam extended the stirrups.
Raine swatted at his shoulder. “What are you doing? Stop. The doctor is going to walk in here any second. Retract those.”
“Not so fast. Lie back, love.” Liam stroked her thigh. “Prop your pretty little feet in these stirrups. Doctor Hammer and I will cure what ails you.”
Raine’s face turned bright red. Macen couldn’t help but laugh.
“Liam Sean O’Neill, you are out of your ever-loving Irish mind if you think—”
