‘I’m not saying anything of the sort. I’m just saying that… I don’t want involvement… I’m not talking about…you know… I want to concentrate on my work…I don’t want to have any distractions…’
‘You don’t want a fling, do you?’ he mused. ‘You want the full works. Marriage, ring on finger, commitment…that’s what this is all about, isn’t it?’
‘Of course not!’
The man across from them looked up, shifted a bit in the seat and settled back to his newspaper, but she could tell from his body language that he was all ears.
‘Of course not,’ she muttered. ‘I can’t think of anything worse than marriage. Ha! I’m now setting off on my life or so it seems. Do you imagine that I want to clutter it up with anything like commitment? Does that make sense to you?’
‘No, but it makes more sense than the rubbish you’ve been coming out with so far.’
‘You,’ she fulminated, ‘are egotistic, bull-headed, arrogant and infuriating.’
‘Actually, I prefer to think of myself as quietly charming, incredibly intelligent, devilishly amusing and, generally speaking, a fount of most wisdom.’ He relaxed back in the chair, folded his arms and closed his eyes.
Why was he looking so damned satisfied? she wondered.
‘The mere fact that you can trot out all that stuff shows that you’re egotistic and infuriating!’
The newspaper had been abandoned by the man sitting opposite them. He was now feigning a light doze, as was Curtis, who was now also wearing a ghost of a smile on his face. It was highly irritating.
‘And what are you smiling about anyway?’ she ranted into his right ear.
‘Was I smiling?’
‘Yes, you were! Why?’
‘I’m always happy when I feel that I’ve got to the bottom of things.’ He still hadn’t opened his eyes, which was making her even more furious because she felt as though she was talking to a brick wall endowed with vocal cords. She couldn’t read what he was thinking from the expression in his eyes, and grappling with mere words was like trying to drink a glass of water with chopsticks.
‘And you think you’ve got to the bottom of me, do you?’ she spat out angrily. ‘Despite what I say, you’ve assumed that I’m after marriage because you just can’t tolerate the idea that a woman might politely decline an offer of a fling with you!’
‘Yes, to the first part, and no, to the second.’
‘And could you do me the courtesy of at least looking at me when we’re having a conversation?’
He duly obliged and rested lazy, blue eyes on her flushed face.
‘Better?’ he enquired.
‘Don’t imagine that you can win me over with a little bit of charm,’ she informed him tersely. ‘I’ve made my mind up and I don’t intend to change it. When we get back to London I shall see about finding somewhere else to live and…’
‘Why?’ he asked reasonably. ‘You have my word that I won’t pester you, so why worry to find somewhere else? You’ll end up heavily out of pocket and you’ll also leave Andy in the lurch. The poor boy won’t know what to do if he’s confined to the house with only his big brother for company.’
‘You’ve been getting along much better recently,’ Jade pointed out, sidetracked momentarily.
‘But there’s still a long way to go. We haven’t really communicated for more years than I care to remember, and with all the best intentions in the world old habits die hard.’
What he said made sense. She could feel herself being persuaded into staying put, at least for the moment. She could always dodge his company when he was around, and he wouldn’t demand her presence at the dinner table or for drinks because he would know precisely why she wanted to avoid him.
‘Besides…’ He flicked a speck of non-existent fluff from his trousers and linked his fingers casually on his lap. His legs were spread slightly apart and his trousers had tightened over his muscular thighs. She made sure not to look too closely at the sight, just in case she became fixated and caught herself doing something crazy like tracing the contours of his legs through the material. To be on the safe side, she clasped her hands together and rooted them firmly on her lap.
‘Besides…’ he picked up, adjusting his legs a little further apart and this time resting his hand lightly on his thigh ‘…sooner or later my duties in England will come to an end, much to my regret…’
‘You’ve enjoyed being back?’ Diverted yet again.
‘More than I thought. Funny thing is that I’ve spent so many years out of the country that I’d fancied myself as the ultimate cosmopolitan creature, but I guess I must just be a homebody after all.’
The thought of Curtis Greene being a homebody nearly brought on a laughing fit.
‘But I won’t be around for much longer…’
She hadn’t considered that angle. She had thought about what it would feel like having to control her feelings in his company, listening from the haven of her bedroom for the sound of his car when he returned from work, for the click of the front door being opened and shut. She had imagined in rich detail the agony of hiding her love while her eyes struggled not to become entangled with his and her mind had fought furiously to break free of its leash. She hadn’t thought about what it would feel like knowing that he was not around, that he had left the country and she would not set eyes on him again. The emptiness that rose in front of her was like the sudden vision of a black hole.
‘I’ve more or less sorted out what needed to be sorted out. It’s now just a matter of tying up a few loose ends and attending to the technicalities of who will replace Andy and in what capacity.’
She opened her mouth to say something nonchalant and cheerful on the subject and discovered that she couldn’t speak. Her power of speech had been paralysed at the prospect of no longer being near him, whatever the circumstance.
‘And, of course, I may just find someone else…’ He let the words drop like poison between them, and then sighed laboriously.
Was it her imagination or were her facial muscles stiffening as well? She couldn’t swallow! She blindly grabbed the glass of mineral water which had been poised, untouched, on the broad handrest, and gulped down a few mouthfuls.
‘Just as you might…’ he continued softly. ‘Don’t kid me by telling me that that vibrant, fiery, sexy, wanton woman I tasted and touched in Scotland is capable of going into hibernation again.’
Tasted…touched… The words evoked images of their lovemaking that were powerful enough to send a wave of moistness between her legs.
He leaned back against the seat, shut his eyes, and seemed perfectly satisfied to leave her with her conjurings.
And now that he had wrecked all her fragile stabs at self-control and determination, she found herself spending the remainder of the short flight in quiet, speechless panic at the prospect of loss. There were plenty of good, solid reasons to combat the primitive terror she felt at losing him completely and for ever, but could they make any headway? Could she feel even the vaguest glimmer of relief at the thought of Curtis Greene going back to New York and being out of her hair for good? She kept up a mental refrain about time being the great healer, and tried to leapfrog the present into some blissful point in the future when he would be nothing more than a dim memory, but it was impossible. The man kept rearing up into every scenario with the tenacity of an avenging angel.
It didn’t help matters that he had now decided on polite indifference to her, at her own miserable request.
They disembarked the plane in silence, and as soon as they were outside he excused himself to make a phone call.
When he returned it was to inform her that he had to leave immediately for a meeting in London.
And will I see you later? She wanted to ask. Instead she nodded and looked away, squinting at the crowds.
‘Don’t expect me back tonight,’ he added. ‘So you can breathe a sigh of relief, Jade.’
‘I’m not relieved!’ she countered, stoking
up some of the anger she had felt earlier on, because good, healthy rage was better than this numbness that had settled in her bloodstream like a toxin. ‘Don’t think for a moment…’
‘This conversation has a déjà vu ring about it.’ He looked around, then glanced at his watch. ‘And I just haven’t got the time to argue with you.’ He rested his eyes on her face. ‘Say hi to my brother.’
With that he was off in the opposite direction, cutting a path through the crowds while she watched in rooted fascination as he weaved his way out of the airport foyer. Before he reached the exit he turned and, mortified, Jade realised that she had not left the spot. He had caught her staring at him red-handed. So much for being cool and in charge of things.
She spun around and flounced away, only realising that she was heading in the wrong direction when she somehow found herself heading back towards the departure lounge, at which point she deftly manoeuvred herself towards the newsagents, bought herself a newspaper and retraced her steps towards the revolving exit doors.
Whatever snow had fallen on the streets of London had been trampled underfoot into muddy slush. It was much milder here than it had been in Scotland, and the threat in the air was of rain rather than snow. She managed to get a taxi and saw that everyone had their umbrellas at their sides, waiting for the inevitable downpour. The dreariness of it all made those few nights in Scotland, with its deep bed of pure white snow, even more magical in retrospect.
Good Lord, just what she needed! Mentally associating Curtis Greene with magic.
But magic, she thought wistfully, was what he had achieved, and in ways he would never have known. He had shown her joy and re-introduced her back into the land of the living. True, she had already taken the first few hesitant steps, but the ground she had covered with him had been more than a few steps. She had leapt forward. The overwhelming grief and guilt that had haunted her after her sister’s condition had been diagnosed, that had plagued her all through her illness and hung on like a swollen leech after her death, had been put to rest. Her grief was easier to bear without the corresponding guilt. She could finally accept that Caroline had died, but that her death did not invalidate all the memories she, Jade, carried of her.
In a cruelly ironic way, the love that had blossomed for Curtis, futile as it was, had given her back her faith in life, had somehow counteracted the bitter sourness of the past. It was as though she had been walking around for over two years without a soul, and he had returned hers, without even realising it.
She barely noticed when the taxi pulled up in front of the house, and she found that she couldn’t wait to get back inside, back to the familiarity of her art things. Hopefully Andy would be around. She needed to talk to him. But as luck would have it, he was at college.
Restlessly she made herself a cup of coffee, settled down at the kitchen table and decided to continue with the project she had been working on before her trip to Scotland. It felt like a lifetime ago, and after staring down at the beautifully manicured but basically tame sketches, she ripped them into pieces, chucked the lot into the bin, pulled out a wad of fresh paper and began to draw.
The pencil flew across the paper as though possessed of a life of its own. Her previously neat, gorgeous and technically sound drawings were replaced by incisive strokes of sheer genius. Her portrait of the wicked rodent, Basil, took on undertones of cunning, and the timid rabbit, Daisy, was no longer merely timid but carried the promise of gritty courage in the wide eyes.
Sheet after sheet came alive. She made herself two more cups of coffee, stuck her feet on the kitchen table, rested the paper on her lap and failed to noticed time going by.
When it got dark, she switched on the kitchen light, absent-mindedly noticing that it was after five, and then lost herself again in her work. She had never felt inspired like this in her life before. It was as though a thousand feelings had been released and in the process some hidden but vital part of her creativity had been unblocked.
It occurred to her, when she paused for breath to look over the work she had done, that if she could maintain this frantic, inspired pace, then Curtis Greene’s entrance into the twilit, manageable world of the ‘Vaguely Remembered Though Not Entirely Forgotten’ would be all the quicker.
She allowed optimism to flourish for a few seconds before sinking into blinding desolation, where she remained, staring vacantly at the kitchen wall, until she heard the clatter of footsteps, followed by a tousled, immensely cheerful-looking Andy.
‘You’re back!’ he cried, whereupon she burst into immediate tears, and at five past seven was still at the kitchen table, attempting to regulate her puffy eyes and reddened, blotchy face into something resembling a human being.
‘How could I have fallen in love with your brother?’ she asked, for the umpteenth time. Before Andy could open his mouth, she stared past him, eyes narrowed, and glumly listed all the reasons that came to mind. ‘Of course, I was stupid,’ she dutifully reminded them both. ‘I should have seen what was coming and got out while the going was good. How could I? Your brother? Someone I was primed to dislike! In fact, someone I did dislike! To start with…’
‘Love is—’
‘A nightmare.’ Jade stood up and restlessly paced the kitchen, then slumped back into the chair and propped her chin in her hands. ‘What about fairytale endings?’ she demanded, leaning forward, palms flat on the table. ‘You answer me that!’
‘They don’t—’
‘Bloody exist!’ She glared at Andy, who volunteered a rueful smile in return. ‘He’s your brother!’ she accused.
‘An accident of birth, darling. Nothing I can do about that!’
‘I would never have set eyes on the man if it hadn’t been for you…!’
‘Oh, no, you don’t!’
‘Well,’ she pouted sulkily, ‘it’s true! Besides, if you were a good enough friend, you’d give me free rein to vent all my frustrations on you.’ But her vitriol had dissipated and they smiled feebly at one another. He was clasping her hand when they heard the front door slam and the sound of urgent footsteps heading towards the kitchen.
Guiltily, she snatched her hand back, just in time to see Curtis sweep through the door waving a newspaper in his hand.
He looked something, but she couldn’t figure out what. Darkly flushed, energised, or maybe just terrifyingly sexy, with his top buttons undone and his free hand holding his jacket over his shoulder.
‘Have either of you seen this?’ He was still waving the newspaper and she wondered whether that look of his wasn’t related to excessive drink. Why else would he be storming towards them flapping a newspaper in his hand? What was there to see in the newspaper? More updates on the Middle Eastern crisis? A further outbreak of Legionnaires’ disease in some holiday resort? And was it that important? In her frame of mind, she hardly thought so.
He approached the table where she and Andy were still staring at him with twin expressions of bewilderment and slammed the paper onto the table.
‘Look! Have a little read! Should get your appetites soaring!’
CHAPTER NINE
‘BUT how on earth did this happen?’ Jade demanded for the third time. She had stormed behind Curtis into the sitting room and now flounced into one of the chairs, tucking her feet underneath her and feverishly scanning the article again.
It was short and scandalously to the point. She and Curtis Greene, millionaire bachelor and fantasy of many an aspiring woman’s dreams, were engaged. The article had been written with salacious gusto and listed the numerous dazzling women to whom he had been romantically linked over the years in America, including one very famous actress and an equally famous supermodel. In comparison, their succinct description of her, as an ordinary, run-of-the-mill art student, smacked of patronising incredulity, and she could understand why.
Andy, of course, had found the whole thing vastly amusing. He had been the first to snatch the newspaper out of his brother’s hand, and she had left him in the kitchen gleefully
quoting snippets of the article at her.
Scottish snow sends temperatures soaring…
Jade Summers, mystery woman, manages to steal millionaire’s heart…
Former office worker and simple art student manages to net New York’s biggest fish…
Close friends say that this is the real thing…
‘This is ridiculous!’ she spluttered, staring at him while he calmly poured them both a drink. ‘And I’m not in the mood for a drink!’ she flared, staring at the glass, then at his face, with tight-chested anger. ‘And what friends? What close friends? Who are they talking about?’
‘Drink it. Might calm you down.’
‘I am perfectly calm!’ she shouted back, and he shrugged, deposited the glass on the table next to her and then sat down on the sofa and languidly crossed his legs. He was a picture of self-control. The jacket had been discarded somewhere in the kitchen and he had roughly rolled the sleeves of his navy and blue pinstriped shirt to his elbows, affording her the unwelcome sight of his muscular arms sprinkled with dark hair.
She took a few deep breaths and leaned forward in the chair, resting the weight of her arms on her thighs.
‘Do you have any idea how this ludicrous rumour started? It was one thing going along with a ridiculous, fictitious engagement in the middle of Scottish nowhere-land, but it’s a different matter completely when it’s splashed all over the gossip columns of the London newspapers!’
‘I don’t think Tom would be too impressed with your description of where he lives as “the middle of Scottish nowhere-land.’”
‘Stop trying to change the subject!’
‘I’m merely trying to behave sensibly about this.’
‘Behave sensibly?’ Jade choked. ‘Behave sensibly? How can we behave sensibly when…when…?’ Words nearly failed her. ‘When…you fling a newspaper at me and I’m faced with my own name in print? Alongside yours? What,’ she wailed, ‘are we going to do?’
A Scandalous Engagement Page 14
