Living With Him

by J. L. Ostle

  My mouth hangs open, no wonder she was looking at me with disgust. “You are meant to be with her?”

  “But I won’t since all she cares about is status and money. I want more of a down-to-earth girl. I grew up with women like her and they can be real bitches.” We laugh.

  “Yeah, she seems to have that aura about her.” I start to feel a little more relaxed and not once has he made me feel that I was any less than what he was, no matter that I’m much more less privileged..

  For the rest of the evening, we continue to talk about anything and everything. Dante makes me laugh and smile; he is very charming and says all the right things. I feel eyes on me every once in a while from the people in the restaurant, but I ignore it. After we eat and he pays, we go for a walk and when he holds my hand, my body tenses up. He notices and lets go but I hold it again. He is nice and I do like him.

  He drives me back and walks me to the front door, smiling shyly at me and I look at the ground.

  “Is it too soon to ask you out on another date?”

  I look up and smile. “Not at all.”

  He smiles. “Want to go on another date with me?”

  “I would really like that.”

  Then he is the one to look at the ground and when he looks back up, he leans forward and kisses my cheek, being the perfect gentleman. “Good night, Riley.”

  “Good night, Dante.” I watch him walk back to his car and before he gets in, he gives me a small wave and I wave in return and go inside.

  Once I’m inside Kendra pulls me to the middle of the room. “How was it?”

  “It was amazing. He took me to this really fancy restaurant where they don’t show prices on the menu.” She squeals. “Then after we ate, we went for a walk holding hands.” Her eyebrows rise at hearing that. “Then he took me home.”

  “Did he kiss you?”

  I shake my head. “Just on the cheek. He was being the perfect gentlemen, and …” I pause for dramatic effect. “He asked me out again.”

  She screams and we both jump up and down in glee. “Why didn’t you let him kiss you?”

  I give her a pointed look. “You know I have never kissed a boy before and I got all nervous and I just wanted to follow his lead.”

  “You’ve never kissed a boy before?” Jackson asks incredulously as he enters the room and I feel my face turning bright red.

  “Oh, my God, this is so embarrassing.” I run up the stairs to Jackson's room, jumping onto the bed, face-first. Soon there is a knock on the door.

  “Kitten?” I hear him call.

  “Go away. I am mortified you just heard that.”

  I feel the bed dip. “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

  “Of course there is. I’m twenty-two years old and I’ve never kissed a boy. I’m pathetic.”

  “No, you’re not. I’m surprised and shocked but you're not pathetic.”

  I sit up and hug one of the pillows to me. “I am. What am I going to do on the next date when he tries to kiss me? What if I kiss him and it’s so terrible that I scare him off?”

  He looks down at the floor and back up. I see an emotion in his eyes that I can’t explain. “You will be a great kisser and if he says anything I will kick his ass, okay?”

  “You just want a reason to kick his ass,” I joke and he laughs.

  “True.”

  I sigh and fall back onto the bed. “I just want to make sure that I’m okay at it. Maybe I should ask Kendra to kiss me,” I tease and when I look at Jackson he isn’t smiling. He has this dark look in his eyes but it’s gone within a second.

  “That could work.” We laugh. “Or you could kiss me.” We both go silent. I look at him and his eyes are trained on me.

  “You want to kiss me?” I squeak.

  “Just to give you that confidence boost. I can tell you if it’s okay and then when you do kiss Dante,” I notice he grits his teeth when he says his name. “You know you will be fine.”

  I look up at the ceiling, thinking it over. Could I kiss Jackson? Wouldn’t it be weird? But if I kiss him, he will be honest and tell me if the kiss was okay. “Is it okay if I think about it?”

  He nods and stands. “Yeah, that’s fine. I’m your friend and you know you can trust me.” He gives me a shy smile and leaves the room and I lie there taking his words in. What if I kiss him and it's weird afterward?

  I don’t know how long I lie there for, but I must have fallen asleep because when I open my eyes, Jackson is lying next to me and by his steady breathing he is asleep. I turn my body so I’m facing him and I have to admit I enjoy watching him sleep. He looks so much younger, more vulnerable. I look at his lips and they look so soft.

  I lift my hand and trying not to wake him, I place my thumb on his bottom lip, stroking it slowly. He stirs a little but doesn’t wake. I move my body a little so that I’m a little closer and I can feel his breath against me, sending shivers up my arms.

  I look at his lips again and without thinking I press my lips to his softly and I feel this current, this pull run through my body by just this small contact. I am about to pull back when I feel his hand press into my back, pushing my body close to his. I open my eyes to see his eyes watching me.

  Without thinking about anything else, I close my eyes again and I feel his lips start to move so I follow his movement. I feel our bodies moving in closer, leaving no space between us. I feel my whole body start to heat up and this ache starts to build inside me.

  His tongue glides along my bottom lip and I open my mouth, giving him entry and our tongues push against each other in a seductive rhythm. I have so much pleasure zooming through my body. I lift my leg, wrapping it around his waist as he pushes his groin against mine.

  His fingers dig into my hair, pulling me more into him. Our kiss is getting harder and faster. I start grinding myself against him, never wanting this to stop. I grind harder, causing us both to moan. My fingers dig into his bicep and when I feel that throbbing ache between my thighs, I know that we have taken this too far. I pull away and move to the far end of the bed without falling off and both our breathing is coming in fast.

  “I am so sorry,” I say over and over again. “I didn't mean to. I just had what you said going over and over in my head.”

  He sits up and takes my hand. “It's fine. I told you I would tell you if your kiss was okay and trust me, it was more than okay.” We both laugh.

  “So, it was good?” I bite my lip and his eyes go to the movement then he looks away.

  “It was beyond good. We just got into it. We lost our heads.”

  “Yeah, we did.” I press my hand against my chest. I look at him and I don’t know why but I have this strong urge to kiss him again. I really want him to kiss me. To want me.

  Like he can sense it, he quickly stands. “I am going to go take a shower.”

  I nod and I watch him gather his stuff and go. I lie there pressing my fingers to my lips. That was my first kiss and it really was mind-blowing.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Jackson comes back in after his shower and he lies next to me and we both look up at the ceiling.

  “Did you enjoy your date?” he asks me, turning his head so he is looking at me.

  “Yeah, I did. It was nice.”

  “He is taking you out again?”

  I nod. “Yeah.”

  He nods. “What did you guys talk about? Where did he take you?”

  I look at him and he does look interested so I tell him everything from the moment Dante picked me up until he dropped me off. I smile all the way through it and he asks questions every now and then.

  I start to yawn and we both look at one another as we lie on our sides and he smiles at me. “I’m glad that you had fun.”

  “Thank you.” I grin. We both just smile at one another when I hear my phone vibrate, indicating an incoming message so I move to the nightstand, grabbing my phone and I smile when I see a message from Dante.

  Dante: I hope I haven’t woken you,
but I couldn’t sleep without seeing if you were free Tuesday night x

  I smile and reply back.

  Me: Tuesday sounds perfect x

  Dante: Can’t wait. Sweet dreams beautiful x

  I turn back to Jackson and the smile on his face is gone. “Was that Dante?”

  I smile. “Yeah, he was asking me if I was free Tuesday for a second date.” I clap my hands in a girly way. “At least now I know that if he kisses me it won’t make him run a mile.”

  His eyes go dark and I see lines form on his forehead and he turns so he is lying on his back again. “Yeah, that won’t happen,” he says in a soft voice and I look at him for a minute before I turn the other way and close my eyes.

  Tuesday night comes quickly and he takes me to dinner for sushi and we go dancing. He makes the date fun and I giggle at all his silly jokes. When he takes me home I am ready for our kiss. I stand there waiting for his lips to touch mine, but before that chance even happens, the front door opens, and Jackson is ruining the moment.

  That goes on for the next couple of dates. Every time Dante takes me home, we never have a moment to share a kiss. I have words with Jackson but he keeps saying it’s just a coincidence. I am starting to get annoyed by it and from the look on Dante’s face, so is he.

  During lunch, I meet Dante in the cafeteria and he sits next to me where Jackson normally sits and he is kind enough to get me a can of Coke and a light blue frosted cupcake, saying it reminded him of our first date and the color of my dress, which I thought was extremely sweet.

  Jackson sits opposite us with an indifferent look on his face and when a girl tries to flirt with him he waves her off telling her he isn’t in the mood. I see the lines and dark circles under Jackson’s eyes and I start to worry that he is getting sick and my attention keeps shifting to him.

  “So, are you having your annual theme party, J-man?” Jermaine asks him. I look up, wondering what they are talking about.

  “Not sure as I have roommates now.” He looks up at me and then looks away. He has an annual party and he may not have it because of us?

  “I don’t mind if you throw a party,” I say.

  “Neither do we,” Kendra adds. “What is the theme this year?”

  Jackson pauses to think about it. “Beach?” He looks around the table and everyone nods.

  “Yeah, that is a great idea, all the ladies wearing their bikinis. You are a god, my friend.” Jermaine claps his back and everyone starts to talk about the party.

  “Am I invited?” Dante asks me and I smile.

  “Of course.” He smiles back at me and when I look up, Jackson is glaring at him.

  “Great, if this is the only chance I get to see you in a bikini, I am going to make sure I witness it.”

  I nudge him with my shoulder. “That includes you, you know. I expect you to wear swim shorts.”

  “I look good in swim shorts.” We both laugh and he kisses the tip of my nose and I am sure the smile on my face is huge. “Right, I need to go and head to class. I will see you later.” He kisses my cheek, stands, and walks away. I watch him go and when he is gone from sight I notice a few stares from around the room.

  “Why are people looking at me?” I say quietly to Kendra and she looks around the room.

  “Take a picture,” she shouts and I put my head in my hands. Why did I have to mention it? “They are probably shocked that you two are together and they want to watch.”

  Great. “The joys. Well, I think I need to head to class too.” I stand and Jackson stands also.

  “I will walk you.”

  Behind me, I hear a girl talking. “She is seeing them both. She lives with one and dates the other.” I turn to see two freshmen talking into each other’s ear and when they see me looking at them, they look away.

  People think I am being with them both and before that, it was me and Jackson sleeping together as he slept with other women also? These people are disgusting.

  I walk next to Jackson side by side, but I look at the floor as I walk. I feel like everyone is watching my every move. I remember the times I was invisible and a part of me wants to go back there.

  “Are you okay, kitten?”

  “I heard two girls talking before. They think I am sleeping with you and dating Dante. People must think I’m a whore and a slut.” I feel tears in my eyes.

  “No one thinks that and if they do, they don’t want to cross me. You are anything but.” He holds onto my shoulders and I nod.

  “I just don’t get why people go around spreading this stuff.” We continue walking.

  “People like to live their lives through other people. This school is bad for gossip.”

  “Yeah, I’ve noticed.” I look forward and see a few people watching us. “They watch us like we are a reality show. It’s starting to get annoying.”

  “Welcome to my world.” I look at him and he kicks a stone with his foot. He is right, I am now in his world. In his world, people watch him, girls surround him, and this is what he has to put up with.

  “You know, I really respect you.”

  He stops and looks at me. “What? Why?”

  “Because I have only been living like this for a short while—people watching me, rumors. You have girls who follow you, who won’t give you a moment’s peace, and you are still a nice guy.”

  “I am not a nice a guy.” He shakes his head.

  “You are to me.”

  He turns his head and looks at me. “You are different.”

  I smile shyly. “You are nice to your band, Kendra, and Jayce.”

  He shrugs. “They don’t annoy me as much.”

  I laugh. “Including Kendra?”

  He chuckles. “Well, Kendra annoys me but I’m used to her now.” We both head to class and sit next to one another, not caring if people watch.

  That night I am in Kendra’s room, she is curling my hair into waves. I’m dressed in tight black jeans and a dark purple tank top with a denim jacket. I want tonight to be the night Dante kisses me. I am leaving her room when Jackson smiles when he sees me.

  “Hey, kitten, want to go out for something to eat?”

  I look at the floor and back up. “I have a date.”

  “Another date?” he says exasperatedly.

  “Yup,” I say, popping the P. “Another date.” I hear the doorbell and I run to the door to answer it and I am greeted by a charming smile.

  “You always look amazing.” I beam at him and he walks towards me kissing my cheek.

  “Thank you.” I walk back to grab my phone and I quickly hug Jackson before I leave. “We can go eat another time, okay?” I smile at him and walk back to Dante, holding his hand. I am now used to his touch and my body doesn’t tense anymore. I am walking down the path when I hear my name being called out.

  “Tomorrow?” Jackson shouts and I turn.

  “Sure. It’s a date,” I joke and he smiles at me, looks at Dante and then closes the door.

  “Should I be worried?” Dante asks me but from the smile on his face, I know he is okay with it.

  “Not at all.” I squeeze his hand.

  During dinner, he tells me stories about the parties he has thrown and about the party at Jackson’s. I tell him I have never heard of his parties and I don’t know what to expect.

  “All the parties get wild but at least I know I will have your company to keep me entertained,” he says smoothly.

  “The place is probably going to be full of girls showing too much skin, doing body shots,” I joke.

  “And you aren’t one of those girls?”

  I shake my head. “No way.” We both laugh.

  “I still look forward to spending more time with you.” He kisses my cheek.

  Dante drives me back home and he is about to climb out of the car when I grab his hand, stopping him. I feel my heart racing.

  “Everything okay?”

  I nod. I look at him and at his lips and I lean forward and press my lips against his. His lips are soft an
d his lips linger on mine for a moment before his lips start moving and I follow his lead. It starts off slow and gentle and after a moment his kiss gets firmer.

  He holds the back of my head and pulls me in closer to him. There is hardly any space in the car but we make it work. My chest is pressed against his. I wrap my arms around his neck and I hear him groan into my mouth.

  He moves forward so my body is pressed against the car door, his mouth never leaving mine. He guides my leg so that it’s over his waist and I feel his hand glide down my back to my ass and then to my thigh.

  I am so into the kiss that I yelp when the car door opens and I fall back, landing on the ground and I look up to see a very angry Jackson.

  “Jackson, what the hell?” I try to stand and I feel his hand on my arm, pulling me up so that I’m standing next to him.

  “Riley, are you okay?” Dante asks me and then gets out of the car, glaring at Jackson. “You could have hurt her.” Dante’s voice raises and I jump from the impact of it. I see Jackson looking at him with his fists turning white so I turn to Dante with apologetic eyes.

  “I am so sorry, Dante. I better go in.” I kiss his cheek.

  “Are you sure?”

  I nod. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  He gives my hand a squeeze, gets in his car, and drives away. I turn to Jackson. I have never been angry at him before. I am always patient with him, always forgiving but now he has just gone too far.

  Chapter Nineteen

  I stomp into the house with Jackson right behind me. I turn around and face him with my arms crossed.

  “I can’t believe you just did that. You embarrassed me in front of Dante,” I shout at him.

  “I think your lover boy will get over it.”

  I growl pulling my hair. “What do you think you were doing?”

  “I was helping you,” he yells at me and I laugh.

  “Helping me? How the hell were you helping me?” I ask.

  “You were making a scene in the damn car. We have neighbors, you know. You shouldn’t be making out where any Tom, Dick, or Harry can see.”