With racing thoughts I tried to hold onto the tenuous reality that clashed in the worst kind of way, smashing memories together and making no sense, threatening my will to go on.
After barely escaping the bulldozer and losing Paradom, I’d headed out of his den, quickly returning to the city center. The idea I’d become anything like him consumed me; a fright so blinding it had me spinning still.
Paradom had left me with more questions than answers, but there was a fragment of hope that some of the things he’d talked about were true, like the scrolls really existing and I could only guess that Jacob had sought out Paradom looking for answers for me.
The rest of the evening had continued to spiral downward fast and I had the faint recollection of slaughtering an entire gang in a poorly lit alley just off Tottenham Court Road, after one of them went for me with a knife and threw an insult I didn’t much care for. After chastising the thug for his rudeness and finding little amusement in our verbal sparring, I’d sucked him dry. Not wanting to leave his friends out of our dark soiree, I’d dealt with the other four, leaving their bodies scattered in front of an old crooked dumpster missing a wheel.
Hence the blood.
Grateful not only for the sustenance but that our disagreement had been quickly resolved, I’d headed to the only place that understood the art of pain, the age-old craft of forgetting or as a poor second, the gift of numbness.
Belshazzar’s, the majestic domain where outcasts felt welcome.
Something trickled down my forehead and I wiped it off with the back of my hand, assuming it was blood.
Nightwalkers edged along the bar, quickly disappearing from sight. Marcus came into focus, his expression calm and with a wave of his hand he ordered the rest to leave.
He gave a wry smile.
I ran my fingers through my matted hair, wondering if it was as bad as it felt.
“Oh yes,” Marcus answered my unspoken question. “Good thing you chose tonight. Last night we had wall to wall transvestites and they never take kindly to that much blood.” He came closer. “Looks like you took a bath in it, which I’m not opposed too, only you’ve ruined a perfectly good pair of shoes.” He leaned in close. “I know who you are.”
Seconds passed where I tried to find the words to express that which I couldn’t reach.
“Orpheus, are you fucking kidding me?” Marcus asked.
“Who told you?” My voice sounded foreign, strained.
“Sunaria.”
Everyone had now gone other than Zachary, who stood near the bar staring at me, aghast.
My eyes widened in wonder. “Sunaria’s alive.”
“She most certainly is.” Marcus wiped a smudge of blood off my left eyelid. “And yet stranger things have happened. Notice I’m looking at you.”
“I messed up.” I rubbed my jaw line, trying to find the words that would make sense.
“Whoever you drank from tonight was high. You do realize that right?”
I gave a drunken grin.
Marcus stepped back and glanced at Zachary. “Who do think he looks more like, Jadeon or Orpheus?” Marcus snapped his head back to face me and grabbed my arm.
“I take it you need convincing,” I said.
“Could say that.” He tightened his grip and peered over at Zachary. “Go fetch my whip.”
“I was hoping you’d say that.” I grinned, but it soon faded.
Marcus watched Zachary step into the elevator. The doors closed behind him.
“Sunaria told me that while fighting at Stonehenge you and Jadeon . . .” Marcus couldn’t finish it.
I pulled away. “Joined.”
“Sunaria resurrected you?” he asked fiercely.
“Marcus, it’s me.”
He showed a moment of weakness. “What’s your endgame?”
“Some part of you must believe it?”
“You told me you were Orpheus’s accountant?”
“I had to come up with something.”
“Why not the truth?”
I shifted away from him. “Because I knew you wouldn’t believe me.”
“I’ve never trusted Sunaria.”
“I thought you’d both gotten over that.”
He grabbed me by the throat.
I didn’t flinch. “We used to hang out at Madam Rouge’s,” I said, “well you more than me. It was the place that gave you the idea for Belshazzar’s.”
He squinted my way. “What year?”
“1596 wasn’t it?” I lowered my voice. “I caught my doppelganger kneeling between your legs—”
“What do you want?”
“Marcus, it’s me.”
“I’m going to lash you within an inch of your life.”
My mind drifted, desperate to feel his leather strikes slicing through my flesh, overlaying previous strikes, promising a continuous hypnotic rhythm, bringing with them relief from the internal voices, a terrible chattering refusing to fade.
“I can’t figure out whose side to be on.” I pressed my hand to my chest. “Marcus, I need you to get at it.” I clutched my shirt. “Cut it out of me.”
“Cut what out?”
“Him.”
Marcus faltered, showing a moment of weakness as though hoping he’d found me, and yet fearing he had. “Orpheus believes pain is the pathway to the soul.”
“Evidently I’m not right in the head,” I said.
Marcus shook off his hesitancy and took the whip from Zachary, who’d reappeared out of the lift.
“Go get our friend here some fresh clothes,” Marcus ordered him.
Zachary froze where he stood, his face full of dread.
Marcus threw Zachary a look. “Shall I use it on you first?”
Those words forced his fledging to fly from the bar.
Marcus peered into my eyes. “Jadeon?”
I shook my head. “It doesn’t work like that.”
“Enlighten me?”
“I seemed to have developed an annoying conscience.” I squeezed my eyes shut and then opened them again, trying to focus. “Apparently this thing can be reversed.”
He lowered the whip.
“Aren’t you sick of red hair?” I asked. “I mean really, you look ridiculous.”
“Orpheus has a thing for redheads.”
“That would be bed head.”
Marcus threw down the whip. “I don’t doubt you can take it.” He grabbed my shoulders and shoved me upright. “We need to get to the truth.”
I frowned at the whip at his feet and it moved toward Marcus’s foot as though pushed with an invisible hand. Marcus didn’t catch my telekinetic nudge.
“What if I ask nicely,” I said.
He kicked the whip out of the way.
“You always did confuse hate with love,” I said.
Marcus buried his fangs in my neck before I could warn him not to, sucking fiercely and rocking against me. Remaining still, I waited, fascinated, wondering just how my blood would affect him.
After a minute, though it could have been longer, I came round to find myself sitting on the floor, slumped up against the bar. Marcus was sitting next to me, his head in his hands.
“I know, right?” I let out a crazy laugh.
“What the hell were you thinking?” He shot me a look of disbelief. “Orpheus!”
“Now you believe me?”
He looked horrified. “How is such a thing even possible?”
I sighed. “I’ve been asking myself that.”
The way Marcus studied me revealed his doubting.
“I’m afraid I’m living proof it’s possible,” I said.
“What was that I just drank?” he asked, smacking his lips.
“I’m a Status Regal,” I said, “or have you forgotten?”
“Thanks for the warning.”
“It would have been polite to ask.”
Marcus climbed to his feet and offered his hand. “At any time you could have told me to stop.”
“I did.” I
let him assist me up.
“Sunaria believes your joining is permanent,” he said. “She doesn’t really know anything.” Seemingly shaken, he guided me toward the lift. “How could you have done this to us?”
“It was an accident.”
Marcus shook his head. “I fucking hate you.”
“Really? From the way you were just dry humping me while drinking my blood, I’d never had guessed it.”
“Fuck off.” He stepped into the lift and pushed the down button.
I followed him in. “Charming.”
The doors closed and the lift descended.
Marcus squeezed my shoulder. “I’ve been going out of my head without you.”
I shrugged. “We’ve been through some interesting times together, this shouldn’t faze you.”
“Shouldn’t faze me?” He bit his lip in frustration. “You should have come straight to me.”
“I didn’t know how to tell you,” I admitted.
“Finding out from Sunaria, who’s meant to be long dead, didn’t help either.”
“The last time I saw her,” I said, “I was in no state to discuss this with her.”
“Back at the Mount?” He studied my face. “How does it feel?”
“Terrifying.”
Together we strolled out.
He shook his head in frustration. “Orpheus! You were always looking for that next rush, that next daring adventure.”
We made our way along the sweeping corridor and headed toward the executive quarters.
“Tell me you didn’t do this on purpose?” He opened a door.
I went through ahead of him. “Of course not.”
We’d arrived within Marcus’s private suite.
“Everything Sunaria told me about you is true.” His voice reeked of desperation.
“I take it you don’t approve.” I said, failing to inject humor.
“Don’t leave like that again.”
I gave a gesture of frustration. “I have two opinions in my head and they both sound right!”
“You messed up royally this time.”
I shook my head. “Wait . . . I’m wondering how you’re coping, Marcus. Does that sound like me?”
“You’re home now, where I can take care of you.” He stepped forward and embraced me.
I waited for his hug to end.
Marcus broke away. He had smudges of blood on his shirt, rubbed off from me, but he didn’t seem to care.
“That flash drive in the safe?” I said at last.
“What about it?”
“I need to check out the names on it.”
“Sure,” he said. “Why?”
“Apparently the Stone Masters have something that might help me reverse.”
“Now you’re really scaring me.”
“Just get it for me,” I said.
“I’m so relieved to have you back.”
“It’s good to be here.” I suppressed a frown, not sure if those words rung true.
Marcus didn’t catch it. “You have to talk to her.”
“Sunaria’s here?”
“I’ve never seen her so lost.”
I studied the door suddenly aware of why Marcus had led me here.
He reached for the handle. “She’s very fragile right now.”
Hands trembling, realizing the very reason for every action I’d taken, the catalyst for centuries of yearning was on the other side . . .
. . . And yet something within me resisted.
Sunaria was laying upon the King bed surrounded by numerous newspapers and magazines spread over the covers. Her bewitching presence soaked through my flesh like the darkest dreaming, inducing a painful rush of memories.
Although she seemed hesitant, I sensed she was pleased to see me, as though our exchange back in Cornwall was merely a lover’s quarrel.
I stepped toward her. “I’m sorry about . . . back at the Mount.”
She peered at my scarlet stained shirt and then her steely turquoise gaze settled on me. “You’ve even got blood in your hair.”
“Had a run in with some thugs.” I gave a shrug. “They had knives.”
“It’s your blood?”
“As soon as I knew you were here, I came in.”
Her expression reflected disgust. “Apparently they have modern appliances now. Like showers.”
Filled with panic that our first real reunion was already going awry, I broke her glare, stung by her tortuous silence, my chest tightening with tension.
Self-conscious, I undid my shirt, ripping the last few buttons off and then removing it, throwing it into the corner.
I glanced over at the TV. “Quite something isn’t it?”
“Planes in the sky too,” she said.
“Man has walked on the moon.” I sighed. “Quite something from our day.”
“I recognize nothing.” She swung her legs over. “Not even you.”
“You’ve been asleep awhile.” I took a step closer.
“Orpheus?” she whispered.
The name sounded like a lie.
She looked fierce. “Jadeon, when this is over, I will kill you for this.”
“We were fighting over Stonehenge,” I began. “The sun arose and—”
“I know how it happened. I just don’t understand why?”
“I was taking revenge for your death,” I said.
She seemed suddenly overwhelmed.
I struggled to find the strength to deal with her pain, still reeling with mine. “Jacob . . . saved you.” I tried to grasp what those words really meant. “He bribed the Stone Lords for your ashes.”
“Fabian only agreed to resurrect me because Jadeon Artimas begged him.” She shifted closer to the edge.
I gave a careful gesture of acknowledgment.
“This sudden awakening,” she continued, “finding the world has nothing in common with the one I left behind is too much.”
“You’ve been jolted through time,” I said, offering my understanding of what she was going through.
Only now did I take in the simple decor of Marcus’s suite, the neatness. The comforting intimacy of an old friend’s place; cool white walls and furniture with simple lines, a classic, crisp, clean design emanating sophistication.
Sunaria followed my gaze around the room. “Does Marcus believe me now, about you?”
“He seems to.” I sat beside her and reached for her hand. “You and I were inseparable.”
She pulled her hand away.
I gave her a nudge. “Since when did you become so sensitive?”
“Since Jadeon murdered my lover.” She stared into my eyes as though throwing a warning.
“I’m not dead, just . . .” I gently took hold of her chin and lifted her head to look at me. “Sunaria, I have you back.” And yet my thoughts betrayed me, devouring each other, as though some part of her terrified me.
She sensed my reticence. “This can be undone?”
“Jacob believes so.”
“Can we trust him?”
“What choice do I have?” I stared at nothing.
Sunaria rested her hand on my knee and then quickly withdrew it. “You’re . . . not yourself.”
Panic washed over me and I tried to save myself from sabotaging this moment. “You’re not planning on staying, are you?”
“There’s nothing for me here.” She stood up though remained close. Close enough to take her hand and kiss it, beg her to love me as she once did.
“You’re upset with me because I failed to save you, is that it?” I asked. “On that beach in Spain, I begged you not to go. You should have listened.”
“You never forgave me,” she said.
“I never got over your death.” I clenched my jaw, angry with myself that it had come out wrong. “Look, I’m so far down the rabbit hole I’m beginning to doubt there’s a way back.”
“Rabbit hole?”
“It’s a reference to . . . Alice in Wonderland—” I felt ridiculous. “Which you’d h
ave absolutely no idea about.” My shoulders slumped with the realization of what Sunaria was facing. “You can’t leave here until one of us has updated you on all the dangers out there.”
“You don’t get to dictate what I can or cannot do.”
“You’re not capable of making any decisions.”
“I could say the same about you.”
Trying to shake off my frustration, I said, “This moment, I never believed it would ever happen.”
“You gave up on me.”
Her words stung deep and I was stunned with her lack of sympathy.
Marcus was standing in the doorway. “Orpheus plans to reverse this, Sunaria,” he said.
“Thought we were calling him William now?” Her tone sliced through the air.
Marcus gestured for me to rejoin him.
“Change your mind,” I pleaded with her. “Stay.”
“Anyone who attempts to imprison me here . . .” though her inflection was passive, the intimation was clear.
Marcus lowered his gaze. “Sunaria, no one will stop you. You’ve made it quite clear you’re not staying.”
“What are your plans for him?” Her mouth twisted with suspicion.
Marcus stood straight, confident. “It’s my job to pick up the pieces when you break his heart.”
“You left him alone at Stonehenge,” she said. “This is your fault for abandoning Orpheus when Jadeon attacked.”
“Orpheus ordered me to go,” said Marcus. “Don’t you think I regret leaving him there now?”
“The only person I trust is me,” she said. “Snowstrom will put this right.”
Marcus looked harried. “That’s where you’re going, to find Snowstrom?”
Sunaria was defiant. “You get him all to yourself after all, Marcus.”
“I’m right here,” I said.
“Not my Orpheus,” Sunaria snapped.
Her words struck hard and I grasped the door to steady myself. “Sunaria, my love for you goes so deep inside of me that even I can’t reach it anymore.”
Yet she stood there expressionless as though she’d not heard my confession.
When those tortuous seconds became too much, I closed my eyes and rested my forehead against the doorframe. Lord, forgive me for all that I’ve ever done that may have offended thee . . .
“He’s not listening,” she said.
Don’t abandon me in my hour of need . . .
“It’s a little late for that don’t you think?” Her incredulous expression forced me out.
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