The hurt was replaced with anger. “You just fucked me into oblivion, and you have the nerve to tell me you want to go on a date tonight?”
I pushed off my desk, anger now present in my own eyes. “Why not? You made it damn clear this was just about sex. Lots and lots of sex. So why shouldn’t I date. Maybe I need something more than just sex, Charlie. You ever think of that?”
Her throat bobbed as she swallowed hard. “I … I don’t know if I can … I need more time.”
“Time? Honey, you don’t have much time.” I let her read the double meaning behind that statement all she wanted.
And with that, I walked past her and out of my office. I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to play this game much longer. The music started to pound against my body as I walked out into the bar area. One full sweep around the bar and I found the one person I was looking for.
THE SOUNDS OF Mr. Pootie snoring next to me only served as a reminder of how pathetic I was. Here I sat with ice cream in one hand and a remote in the other as I flicked through the channels and talked to myself. My parents’ letters sat on the coffee table, staring at me. I still hadn’t had the courage to open them.
“We already watched that movie last night. Nope. Saw that episode of Cupcake Wars. Ugh, romance movie. No, thank you.”
Hitting the off button, I dropped the remote on the cushion next to me.
“Do you think he’s with her tonight?” I asked, glancing down at my sleeping cat. I poked him to wake him up. I needed to talk, and he wasn’t being cooperative. He looked up at me and shot me the dirtiest look.
“I said, do you think he’s with her tonight?”
I got a meow in response before he laid his head back down, clearly not amused.
“Yeah, I know I’m a stupid ass, but if I open up to him I know what will happen. I can’t fall for him because I have to keep a clear head. After all, I may need to marry him, but falling back in love with him is out of the question.”
Mr. Pootie didn’t even bother to open his eyes when he responded with a drawn-out meow. If I didn’t know any better, I could have sworn he told me to shut up.
“Yes, I know I haven’t fallen out of love with him, but I’ve learned to control that feeling.”
Another spoonful of ice cream went into my mouth.
“What a crock of bullshit,” I mumbled.
I thought back to the other night at Sedotto’s when I walked out of Tucker’s office and saw him talking to the brunette. She laughed at something he said and then when he wrapped his arm around her waist and led her to the door to leave, I almost burst into tears. We’d just finished having sex not even ten minutes before he walked out the door with another woman.
How could he be such a dick?
I closed my eyes and groaned. He’d given me the chance to tell him what we had going on was something more, and I didn’t take that chance. I practically pushed him into her arms. Since then, I’d found out through Lily and Terri that Tucker had been out with this girl at least once more this past week.
Were they having sex? The thought alone made me feel ill.
Maybe I needed to cut my losses with Tucker and find someone else. I didn’t have much time left. I pulled up my contacts and started to go through them. When I landed on Nash’s name, I paused. My finger lingered over the button to push, but I backed out and pulled up Tucker’s name. The racing of my heart should have been my first clue it would be a mistake to call him. What if he was with someone? I didn’t think I could bear the thought. I finally groaned and tossed the phone back down.
“What in the hell am I doing?” The thought of even kissing Nash made me want to gag, yet breaking down and calling Tucker was not an option.
I settled in for a movie and soon found I fought to keep my eyes open. Falling down across my sofa, I grabbed a pillow and closed my eyes for just a few minutes.
The knocking on my door had me jumping up. I spun around a few times and tried to figure out where I was.
My living room.
I’d fallen asleep.
I felt like it’d been thirty seconds, but it could have been three hours for all I knew.
Another knock had me letting out a small scream.
Who in the hell was at my door? If it was my crazy neighbor asking me again for sugar or something, I was going to kick him in the balls.
Throwing open the door, I started to talk. “What do you need now? It’s late and—”
The words faded away when I saw him standing there, his eyes roaming over me, causing me to shiver.
“Tucker? How did you get up here?”
He shrugged. “Your doorman remembered me from the other day.”
“So, he let you up here like he let you up the other day?” I made a mental note to talk to the night doorman about letting men come up to my apartment.
“Yes. Turns out he’s an old softy. Especially after I told him how we were college sweethearts and I was trying to win you back.”
My stomach jumped. “What?”
He laughed and made his way into my place. “Don’t worry, he believed the lie.”
It felt like someone kicked me in the stomach. Tucker wasn’t trying to win me back. Maybe all this was for him was sex. I couldn’t blame him, really. There was no denying the sexual tension between us all these years.
“Why are you here?” I asked, my pain morphing into anger.
“I missed you.”
The softness in his voice almost melted my cold heart.
Almost.
Note to self: Don’t let Tucker into my heart ever again. It’s dangerous.
“What’s wrong? Your date didn’t go well tonight?”
He frowned. “I wasn’t on a date, and even if I was, that was your fault.”
“My fault!” I cried out. “How in the hell is it my fault that you’re dating some … some …”
His eyes widened, and he waited to see what I was going to call the woman I’d seen him leaving the bar with.
“Some fake Barbie.”
He laughed. “Fake Barbie?”
Dropping onto my sofa, I was hit with the memory of Tucker inside me. I pushed it away.
“Go away, Tucker. I’m not in the mood to deal with you.”
“If you didn’t want me here, why did you call me?”
My head snapped up and I laughed. “Huh? I didn’t call you. Seriously, was the date that bad you have to make up excuses to come see me? That’s really sort of sad.”
He smirked. “You called me about an hour ago. I kept calling out your name, and you didn’t answer. I got worried and came over to make sure you were okay.”
The stupid, warm, fuzzy feeling in my chest made me swallow hard. Damn him for being sweet.
“I didn’t call you. I think I’d remember if I called you.”
Tucker glanced down next to me and saw my phone. My eyes landed on it, and I picked it up. Pulling up my call log, I saw I had indeed called Tucker about an hour ago.
Shit. Why cruel world, why?
“Oh, I laid down on the sofa and must have accidentally called you.”
The grin that moved over his face made me want to stand up and slap it off him.
He folded his arms across his thick chest, making those pecs appear even bigger.
Look away from his massive chest, Charlie.
Thick, stocky chests were my weakness. Correction: Tucker’s thick, stocky, sexy-as-hell chest was my weakness.
“So, did you have my number pulled up or something?”
“What?” I asked, a nervous chuckle slipping from my lips. “No!”
Good night, nurse. Even I thought that sounded like a lie.
He sat down on the leather chair across from my sofa and stared at me with a look of something akin to sadness appearing on his face.
“I only went out with her twice and nothing happened.”
Please don’t let the relief show on my face. Please.
“What do I care? What you do on your dates is your business
Leaning back, he put his foot over his leg, and I couldn’t help but use that as an excuse to eye him up.
Damn it. Why does he have to be so good looking? He looked amazing in that tight black T-shirt. Every time he moved it showed the definition of his muscles.
Ugh. I hate him.
“You don’t care?”
I wanted to reply that I really didn’t give two flying fucks, but instead, my stupid heart won out over my brain.
“Maybe a little. Did you sleep with her?”
“No. I already said nothing happened,” he answered.
“Kiss her?”
“Yes.”
My chest squeezed with a strange pain.
That’s jealousy, you stupid bitch.
“Oh,” I whispered.
“I kissed her on the cheek the first night when the date was over. The second date, which was another setup date, she kissed me first. On the lips.”
Chewing on the corner of my lip, I asked, “Did you kiss her back?”
“No.”
“Why not?” I asked, hoping his answer had something to do with me. Actually, I hoped it had everything to do with me. It was wishful thinking, but I still held out hope.
He looked me in the eyes and said what I had been silently praying he’d say. “Because all I could think about was how much I wanted to be kissing you instead of her.”
Pressing my lips together, I tried not to smile but lost.
I softly asked, “Really?”
When he smiled and his dimples went on full display, I moaned internally. This love-hate relationship thing we had going on was going to get emotionally exhausting.
“Really-really.”
Mr. Pootie jumped next to Tucker and he jumped back some, letting out a girly scream that made me chuckle.
“What in the hell is this thing? That’s twice now he’s scared the piss out of me.”
Crinkling my nose, I replied, “That is Mr. Pootie, my cat.”
Mr. Pootie had jumped up next to Tucker and was currently giving him the stare down. I forced myself not to laugh as I watched the two of them face off. Poor Tucker. I already knew Mr. Pootie would win.
“What the fuck is wrong with him?”
My mouth fell open. “What do you mean? He’s a perfectly beautiful baby boy!”
Turning to look at me, Mr. Pootie meowed and glared back at Tucker. It was almost as if he was trying to tell me to throw Tucker out of our place.
“He looks like someone was drunk and went at him with some buzz cutters.”
“Tucker! He’s been groomed to look that way. What is the matter with you?”
Lifting his paw, Mr. Pootie gave Tucker a go-to-hell look before he began cleaning himself.
With a glance between my cat and me, Tucker asked, “You did this on purpose? I mean, you had him cut like this intentionally?”
Rolling my eyes, I sighed. “Yes. I had him cut like that.”
“Why? He looks like a pussy.”
With a smirk, I said, “He is a pussy.”
“You do realize if any other cat saw him like this, he’d be made fun of.”
“He would not!” I argued. “He would be the envy of all the other cats. He loves getting his hair cut.”
Tucker looked like he might actually get sick.
“No cat of mine would ever be allowed to get his hair cut like this. Hell. No.”
I couldn’t imagine Tucker with a cat. A dog was a different story. Tucker was the type of guy who would have a boxer or some sort of dog like that. Something athletic and bulky, like he was.
My eyes roamed over his toned body again. I hated the way it made my insides shake. The warmth that pooled in my lower stomach was hard to ignore, especially when the bastard would smile at me like he knew exactly what I was thinking.
“Charlie, if you keep looking at me like that, I’m going to bend you over the couch and fuck you from behind.”
I gulped for air and felt my entire body heat.
“You think I’d let you fuck me after you just insulted my cat?”
Tucker smirked. “I seriously doubt he knows I insulted him.”
Mr. Pootie jumped onto Tucker’s lap and started to knead his paws right on his junk.
“Hey! What in the hell! He’s trying to claw my dick!”
I didn’t even attempt to hide my laughter.
“He’s not trying to claw at your dick. He’s kneading because he wants to snuggle with you.”
Tucker’s mouth dropped open. “Snuggle with me?”
I nodded. “I’m not snuggling with your goofy-looking cat.”
With a shrug, I stood and made my way over to Mr. Pootie. Picking him up, I gave him a kiss before looking down at Tucker.
“That’s a shame. My pussy was really looking forward to a little one-on-one.”
Tucker’s throat bobbed as he narrowed his eyes at me.
“Are you trying to say you want me, Charlie?”
I scoffed. “Hardly.”
Lies! All lies.
I wanted him more than I could stand. I was beginning to wonder who in the hell seduced whom.
He stood and took a step closer to me, causing me to hold Mr. Pootie tighter.
“You’re lying.”
“I am not!” I stated in a childlike voice.
Christ, I’m a grown woman for fuck’s sake.
“Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t want me … right here, right now.”
Ugh. I could lie my ass off in a boardroom, but to Tucker, I was finding it very difficult. My mouth went dry as I struggled to swallow.
“You should go,” I finally managed to get out.
Tucker raised his brows as he slipped his hands into his jeans pocket. He slowly nodded and then moved around me and headed to the door.
Closing my eyes, I fought the urge to call out for him. I needed to keep the ball in my court. I needed to make Tucker want me like he’d never wanted me before. He couldn’t be the one doing the seducing. It had to be me, and I had to make this more about sex and not about the feelings I knew we both had for one another. Or was I going about this all wrong?
“Tucker?” I asked, turning to face him. His smug grin begged to be smacked right off his unshaven face.
“Change your mind?”
“No. I was going to see if you wanted to go to a movie.”
His smile dropped and he stared at me like I’d asked him to solve world hunger. “Like, as in a date?”
I gave a small shrug. “What’s the matter? Do you only think of me as someone you can fuck and then leave? Oh wait, that’s what you did the other day in your office.”
Holding up his hand, Tucker’s eyes went nearly black. “Now hold on a second, I asked you then about this being something more. You’re the one who said …”
“I know what I said then,” I blurted out, cutting him off. “I’m changing my mind.”
The left side of his face twitched with the threat of a smile.
“You want to date?” he asked.
“Maybe. I don’t know. I’d like to give it a try.”
The way he looked at me for the longest time had me dying to know what he thought.
Finally, he frowned and gave me a cautioned look. “Why now, Charlie?”
My heart started to pound at his question. If only he’d known how hard it was to walk away from him all those years ago … how it nearly tore my heart in two. Just a few days ago my only reason for going after Tucker was to save my position as CEO of my father’s company, the company that was now mine. Now it was completely different. The thought of him dating any other woman made me nearly mad. I wanted back what we shared that weekend, and I wanted it back for longer than a damn year.
I chewed on my lip, knowing I should be honest with him. If I came clean now, he’d probably walk out of here and never look back. He’d think I was playing him, and I couldn’t risk that.
“Well, if I’m being honest, maybe my intentions at the beginning were purely selfish reasons.”
His brow lifted. “And now?”
Wringing my hands together, I answered him honestly. “It killed me knowing you left with that woman and went out on a date with her more than once. I didn’t like it.”
The corner of his mouth rose into a small smirk. God, it was sexy as sin.
Note to self: Make Tucker smirk more.
“You didn’t like me being out with her?”
I shook my head then lifted my chin some. “No, and I’m not afraid to admit it. I sat here and pouted about it if we’re going to be truthful.”
He made his way closer to me. “Truthfully? The whole time I was with her, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
I grinned. “What were you thinking about?”
“Being inside of you.”
My breath hitched and I felt the room tilt.
“Touching you and liking how wet and ready you always are for me. Hearing your little whispers begging me to fuck you harder.”
“Tucker.”
My voice sounded heavy and deep. I didn’t remember this version of Tucker all those years ago. The dirty talker. I liked this version very much. Very. Very. Much.
Stepping up to me, he laced his fingers through my hair. “You scare the fuck out of me, Charleston.”
Widening my eyes, I fought to breathe. “I don’t mean to.”
He closed his eyes and whispered, “Don’t hurt me again. Do you hear me?”
With my knees shaking, I reached for him and held onto his arms before I dropped to the floor. His admission to me hurting him all those years ago played havoc with my heart.
Tell him the truth, Charlie. Tell. Him. The. Truth.
When my mouth opened, I had every intention of telling him my stupid plan to seduce him into marrying me because I needed his help in staying CEO of CMI, but a whole other set of words slipped from my lips instead. Words that were more pressing on my body. I’d let my mind sort it all out later.
“Make love to me, Tucker.”
He smiled, pulled my hair back and rubbed his soft lips across mine as he whispered, “Anything for you, Charlie. You’re my fucking weakness. Always have been, always will be.”
He deepened the kiss. I was lost in him. He was my safety, my escape from everything else. He was the world I dreamed of.
“Tucker,” I whispered against his lips. “I need you.”
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