by Nicole Helm
Then she looked at him, studied him again in the way she’d been studying him all week. He wanted to ask what that look was all about, but when he opened his mouth, a good-bye tumbled out instead.
“I’ll get out of your hair. See you tomorrow.”
He backed out of the hangar and turned around once in the shop. He reached his car and promised himself that if he ever got bored again, he’d take his chances with work email.
Callie trudged to the cabin feeling like she’d been through the gauntlet. First, Trevor had called her beautiful and all but kissed her, then the thing she’d been waiting on. Lawson was actually coming home.
Things never could happen one at a time. They always had to happen in a blast, so she couldn’t adequately respond to any one event at the appropriate moment.
After all, what should she have done when Trevor walked in on her feeling sorry for herself, missing her dad, and feeling sick over the thought of selling the Stearman? She thought she’d done the right thing. She’d been honest. Maybe she’d tried to deflect him a little bit, but she’d explained the significance of the plane. Hadn’t backed away from the memory or emotion.
She hadn’t put up a wall or brushed him off. It was supposed to be progress. Was it her damn fault she hadn’t been able to hold it together? She hated to cry, but sometimes she couldn’t keep it all under control. For a moment, it had felt good to let loose, to let emotion pour out. Then Trevor had touched her cheek, and it hadn’t felt friendly. It had felt as good as that emotional release.
But the moment that followed and the way his eyes held hers. The way his mouth had been so close and had so briefly brushed hers. Callie didn’t know what to think of it. She hadn’t initiated anything. Nope. That had been all Trevor.
What the hell did that mean?
Now, Lawson and the boys were coming home. Everyone would be in their rightful place. Until September, when Trevor would leave again. Of course, Seattle was his rightful place, but she was getting used to having him around.
Callie climbed the stairs of the cabin’s porch, each limb on her body a heavy, immovable weight. The last thing she needed was another piece of her life to be conflicted about.
Callie took a deep breath of the spring evening, tried to gain some strength from it. She still felt heavy and uneven.
One thing at a time. First, she’d deal with the news of Lawson coming home. Then she’d figure out what to do about Trevor.
When Callie opened the door and stepped into the small living room of the cabin, Em was curled up on the old, floral print couch with a notebook and pen in her hands.
It made Callie smile. There was some comfort in coming home to Em, exactly as Callie had known she’d be, already planning and organizing. No matter how many things happened at once, no matter how much Callie struggled to deal with every blow, she could always trust Em to be that steady, predictable rock.
“You don’t waste any time making to-do lists.” Callie tried to hold on to that warm feeling of love. Lawson was coming home. She had to work on thinking positively, and having their little family together was positive.
“Never too early.” Em’s grin stretched so wide Callie thought it must hurt her face. “A million things to do the next few weeks.”
“When’s the move home date?”
“The boys’ last day of school is May twenty-third, so he’s hoping to be home by the thirtieth.”
Callie nodded. It gave Lawson, and Sue for that matter, a lot of time to change their minds. Callie didn’t say that, instead she took a seat in the rickety rocking chair in the corner and pulled her knees up to her chin, letting the chair sway back and forth. “What’s first on the list?”
“We’ve got to get the main house clean and ready.”
The weights in her arms felt heavier and Callie rested her chin on her pulled up knees. More work, as if they didn’t have enough. She meant to keep that sentiment to herself, but she muttered it before she had a chance to censor herself. “Great. Another thing to do.”
“How can you say that? Lawson’s coming home.”
Callie wished she could muster half of Em’s enthusiasm, but all she could think about was the time and energy it would take to get the big house ready for three inhabitants.
Just like Gramps’s office, the house down the gravel road stood exactly as it had two years ago. The emotional toll of going through everything that had been Grandma and Gramps’s would be huge.
“Everything will be like it was supposed to be.” Em’s voice was dreamy and almost childlike. “The Baker grandkids running AIF. Like we always planned.”
Yes, like they’d always planned. Callie could still remember huddling together on the porch of her grandparents’ house with Em and Law, talking about how cool things would be when they were old enough to run AIF. They hadn’t thought about Grandma and Gramps being gone, hadn’t thought about how hard it would be to make ends meet, and had instead dreamed of all the good the way kids do.
Callie felt tears sting her eyes again, but she wasn’t about to cry twice in one day. Instead, she offered some practicality in a quiet voice. “It doesn’t magically solve all our problems. AIF could still fail.”
Em’s smile didn’t falter, not for a second. “This isn’t just about AIF. It’s about family. We’ll finally all be in one place.”
Callie closed her eyes. “I know. I’m sorry.” It was hard to be honest about this one thing. She’d kept her concerns about Lawson’s return mainly to herself. And it was hard to be honest, period. She’d spent most of her adult life ignoring feelings, shutting them out. Breaking the instinct to keep it that way would take time and effort.
Em wanted to close that gulf between them, so Callie was determined to keep trying. For Em. Maybe for herself too.
“I guess there’s a part of me afraid it won’t happen. I don’t want to get my hopes up. We have to remember to be practical if we want to save AIF.”
“You worry too much.” Em’s smile was reassuring. “Have some faith.”
“I’ll work on it.” She would really try to work on faith.
Em scrawled another thing on her to-do list so casually Callie figured the conversation was over, but instead of silence, Em kept talking. “Do you want to talk about what was going on between you and Trevor?”
Callie opened her eyes and looked up. “Huh?”
Em rolled her eyes, tapping her pen against her paper. “I may be naïve, but I know a moment when I see one. That was a definite moment. What was going on?”
“Nothing.” Callie replayed the moment in her head. “He said I was beautiful.” She frowned at Em’s goofy grin.
“That’s sweet,” Em said in that dreamy, romantic voice that always made Callie cringe.
“No, it’s stupid. Weird. He didn’t mean it. Couldn’t have.”
“Well, how did he say it?”
Again, the moment replayed in her mind. The way Trevor’s eyes had held hers, the way his voice had been low and serious. Honest. Trevor never lied to her. Callie took an unsteady breath. “He said I was beautiful when I was happy.”
Em issued one of those little aw noises, and Callie scowled.
“Then what?” Em demanded, leaning forward in her seat. Her to-do list balanced precariously on her knees, but she didn’t notice. “Tell me.”
“Then…” Callie’s eyebrows knit together, the memory of being so close to Trevor clogging her lungs all over again. She looked down at her knees, tried to focus on the here and now, but the memory took over, causing her hands to tremble just a little.
It had felt like an eternity standing there, eyes locked to Trevor’s. His breath had been warm on her skin, her heart had sped up at the proximity of their bodies, but she hadn’t been able to break the moment until he had. “He almost basically kissed me.” Exasperated, Callie looked up at Em. “Why would he do that?”
Em’s smile was sympathetic. “You don’t want me to answer that.”
Callie looked down at her
knees. Come to think of it, she probably wouldn’t like any answer to that question. “No, I don’t.”
“What’s next?”
“Nothing. Nothing happened and nothing is going to.”
“Why not?”
Because I’m scared. Because I’m unsure. Because I’m not what he needs/deserves/wants. But none of those reasons spilled out. Callie’s throat closed so she couldn’t squeak a word.
“You need to figure it out. September will be here soon enough.”
Trevor’s impending departure was as much a reason as all the others. Trevor was the only man she’d ever wanted a future with and the only way to ensure that future was to remain friends. If they made it into something more and then he left, it would all be over.
Keeping him at arm’s length wasn’t a wall. It was what had to be done. Callie was positive Trevor would be feeling the exact same way.
Chapter Seven
“Are you sure I need this much hairspray?”
Trevor stifled a yawn as Em put the finishing touches on Shelby’s prom ensemble. The whole thing was taking forever, and he didn’t know why he was being forced into the role of audience. A teenager getting all dressed up for some dance wasn’t his idea of Saturday night entertainment.
Then again, the options in Pilot’s Point weren’t any more fascinating than this.
Still, he really really hated when they asked for his opinion. What did he know about dresses or makeup or up-dos? Zilch. When he was eighteen he certainly hadn’t noticed his date’s hair or makeup. He’d had other things on his mind, and the thought of those things made Trevor sink farther into the couch and scowl.
“If you want to make it through the dance without a hair out of place we’ll need one more spray.” Em’s tongue pressed to the corner of her mouth as she worked to secure Shelby’s hair.
“If you used the earth killing kind of hairspray, it’d probably only need one coat.” Callie earned a warning look from Em.
Trevor snuck a glance at Callie, who sat on the same couch as him but as far away as she could get. Two weeks since their weird, pseudo-kiss moment and they hadn’t found even footing.
Somewhere in the rational side of his mind he knew he should broach the subject with her. It was the not talking about it that was making things so weird. Unfortunately, his rational side hadn’t been able to coordinate with his mouth yet.
“There.” Em looked expectantly at the two-person audience on the couch.
Trevor straightened, searched for the right words. A compliment, he assumed, was expected. “Uh, you look nice.”
Em rolled her eyes. “Nice?” Em turned to face Shelby and took her by the shoulders. “Shelby, you look gorgeous.” Em’s reassuring smile had Trevor relaxing a little bit. Maybe he sucked at the whole prom thing, but at least he had someone in tow that could give Shelby what she needed.
“Blue was a much better choice than yellow.” Shelby turned to smirk at Callie, but it lacked the kind of fierce heat their interactions used to have. Something had cooled off between the two. Trevor didn’t know what it stemmed from, but it was nice not to have to referee.
“Dan will love it,” Em added, stepping back to admire her work.
“Dan better love it with his hands to himself.” Trevor earned a disapproving look from Em and an additional one from Shelby.
The doorbell rang and some of Trevor’s tension eased again. Shelby looked excited. She looked happy. Though she was obviously trying to play it cool, she couldn’t dim the smile on her face or stop checking herself out in the mirror.
It didn’t have anything to do with him, but he was glad she could have those feelings in this moment. He didn’t want her to be sad, and with the help of the Baker women, she wasn’t.
How weird was that?
It took him a few moments to realize that three pairs of eyes stared at him expectantly. “What?”
“Open the door, moron. Girl’s gotta make an entrance.”
Trevor frowned. Of all people, he didn’t expect Callie to get the girly parts of prom, but he pushed off the couch and went to the door as Em scooted Shelby out of the room.
When he got married and had kids, he hoped to God they weren’t girls. Living through one prom night as a kind of guardian was enough for his life experiences.
On the other side of the door, Dan stood in his tux, looking a little pale. The teen clutched a plastic container that housed a little pink corsage.
“Hi, Mr. Steele.”
Trevor tried not to laugh when Dan’s voice cracked in the middle of the greeting.
“Hey, Dan. Now, before I let you in, I’m going to have to frisk you.”
Dan didn’t look worried, but he did look confused. “Um, okay.”
“It’s a joke.” Trevor moved out of the door and gestured Dan inside. Okay, maybe it would be a little fun to have girls. “Lighten up, kid.”
“O-okay,” Dan agreed.
“Hey.” Shelby stepped out from where Em had hidden her away. “Please ignore my brother. No one gets his jokes.”
Trevor watched Dan smile and fidget a little with the plastic container in his hands. “Oh, it’s okay. Um, here.” He shoved the corsage toward Shelby, hands shaking.
Either this whole dance thing was a first for poor old Dan, or he was acting the nerdy role to keep Trevor from being suspicious about his nefarious teenage motives.
Trevor was pretty sure it was the former.
“Why don’t you put it on her?” Em handed the plastic container back to Dan.
With shaky hands, Dan helped secure the corsage around Shelby’s wrist. It went a long way to soothe Trevor’s nerves at anything crazy happening.
“Well, we better get going so we can meet Haley and Jacob.”
“Home by twelve thirty. Not one drop of alcohol, and Dan, watch those hands.” Again Trevor had to try hard not to laugh when Dan immediately dropped his hands from Shelby’s arm. “You go anywhere besides prom, you text me.”
“You don’t get to tell us what to do.”
Trevor only had to raise an eyebrow to have Shelby backing down.
Her shoulders slumped and she sighed. “Text any change of location. Home by twelve thirty. Got it.”
“Don’t forget to have fun.” Trevor grinned at Shelby’s scowl, but she couldn’t hold it and smiled in return.
“Thanks.” She turned around to face Em and Callie. “Thank you both for everything tonight.”
Callie only shrugged, but Em offered a beaming smile and said, “Our pleasure. Enjoy yourselves.”
Dan and Shelby eventually made it out the door, and Trevor felt weird. He’d done his best, enlisted people to help out with the whole prom situation, and he hoped Shelby hadn’t felt like it was less.
But Trevor was reminded that his mother should have been there, and it hurt even him that she wasn’t. As Em and Callie began to gather their belongings, Trevor felt a sudden odd panic. He didn’t want to be alone tonight.
“You girls want to stay for dinner?”
“Sure,” Em piped up, but Trevor’s eyes were on Callie. She didn’t meet his gaze.
“Yeah, sure,” she echoed, sounding anything but.
“I’ll walk up to Bennie’s and grab us a pizza.” Em picked up her purse and slid it onto her shoulder.
“You don’t have to do that. We can call some place that will deliver.”
Em was already halfway to the door. “Don’t worry about it. Short walk. Besides it’ll give me a chance to see if Pete’s working. Work up a little discount.” She winked over her shoulder before she disappeared out the door.
Trevor got the distinct impression he and Callie were being left alone on purpose. Unfortunately, he didn’t know what to do about it.
“Em and Pete got a thing going?”
Callie looked at her feet. “I don’t know if I’d classify it as a thing. She goes in and flirts. He gives her a discount on pizza. Since it’s about the only way I get a meal that isn’t veggie frou-frou gunk, I
hope they get married and have lots of little baby pizza makers.”
Trevor forced a chuckle out, but quickly, uncomfortable silence settled over the living room. He really hated that he’d somehow managed to make things awkward between them, and he had no idea how to fix it.
“Want a beer?”
“God, yes.” She pushed off the couch and followed him into the kitchen. Awkward silence followed them as Trevor pulled two bottles from the fridge. He held one out for Callie, opened his mouth to say something and nothing came out.
Callie took the outstretched bottle from his hands. Their fingers brushed, but she showed no outward sign of reaction.
“Wanna go drink it out on the porch? I’m going to pass out from all these hairspray fumes.”
Callie nodded and silently followed him to the front door.
The warm day was slowly cooling into the perfect spring evening. The sun had begun its slow descent. Around them, bugs created a low hum of noise, only punctuated by the distant shrieks of children playing or the rumble of a car pulling into its garage.
The two big trees in the front yard gave an illusion of separateness from the rest of the neighborhood so as he and Callie sat on the small concrete stoop, almost close enough to touch, it wasn’t hard to pretend they were all alone.
Maybe he couldn’t talk to Callie about what was happening between them, but it didn’t mean he couldn’t talk period. “Should I be worried about this whole prom thing?”
Callie smiled, took a slow sip of her beer. “Nah. Shelby’s a good kid, and Dan looked like he might spontaneously combust if they even held hands. He’s afraid of you, which was adorably naïve. I think you’re safe.”
“I don’t want her to be messed up because I couldn’t do the right thing here. I can’t be her dad, but at the same time it doesn’t seem right to just be her brother either.”
