by M. J. Haag
“Close your eyes and rest,” Kerr repeated.
“I can’t. When I close my eyes, I see theirs. The glowing red in the darkness.”
I remembered the first time the hounds attacked Whiteman. No one knew what was going on. The dark, sleek shadows with glowing red eyes came in and bit people. In the glimpse I’d caught, the hounds appeared very similar to greyhound dogs. Only taller, blacker, and with bits and pieces missing.
“Try, Cassie. You will not be able to drive tomorrow if you do not sleep.”
He was right. Trembling, I closed my eyes. Instead of seeing hellhounds, I saw Lilly, alone in her bed.
* * * *
The bed moved. For half a second, I thought I’d crowded Lee out again. Not that I cared. He’d made it clear we weren’t together; yet he still insisted on sharing a bed for Lilly’s sake.
All the bitterness I felt vanished as I realized Lee wasn’t with me. He was gone. So was Caden. And, I was looking for them.
I opened my eyes and looked around the dim room. Kerr stood by a window near the bed. As I watched, he pulled back the curtain an inch to peer outside. Sunlight streamed in.
I couldn’t remember falling asleep. But I did remember I’d been in bed by myself. Was my mind trying to take me back to a time I felt safer, even if I’d been bitter about it? I reached my hand out under the blankets and paused. The spot beside me felt warm. Not only that, but I was fully under the covers and no longer wore my shoes. I wouldn’t have taken off my shoes with the hound howling outside.
The light in the room dimmed again, and I looked up to meet Kerr’s gaze.
“Did you take my shoes off?” I asked.
“You weren’t sleeping well. I took your shoes off and helped you under the covers. You slept much better after that.”
His consideration warmed me. I did feel rested. Really rested.
“How late is it?”
He shrugged, and I looked around the room and saw a watch on the opposite night stand. I slid across the bed, feeling his warm spot again, and checked the time.
“It’s past nine,” I said, throwing back the covers. “We need to go.”
It wasn’t like there was a ton of daylight to start with. Using some of it for something like sleep was unforgivable.
I used the attached bathroom to rush through a morning routine and joined Kerr in the kitchen less than five minutes later. He was at the stove with his back to me.
“Where is everyone?” I asked, looking around the empty house.
“A group returned to Butler to gather more supplies. They’re at the other houses washing.”
He set a cover on the counter, and I sniffed at the delicious smell suddenly teasing my nose.
“Sit,” Kerr said.
He turned holding a pan of scrambled eggs.
“For real? They found eggs?”
I hurried to sit and eagerly watched him plate a large portion of the eggs.
“They smell amazing.” I couldn’t rip my eyes from their golden goodness. How long had it been since I’d eaten eggs like this? Ages. Eggs weren’t my favorite food. At least, they weren’t before the quakes. Now, they looked like stomach gold.
Just as I picked up my fork to take the first bite, Molev walked into the kitchen.
“Good morning, Cassie. Did you sleep well?”
“After a while I did,” I answered absently. Unable to help myself, I forked a large bite and quickly shoved it into my mouth. Kerr had even salted them. I was in heaven.
Molev sat at the table and placed several maps in front of me.
“Can you show me the route you wanted to take today?”
I finished chewing and studied the maps.
We weren’t far from Rich Hill. From there, we’d go down 49 to Nevada then over to hit Fort Scott. After Fort Scott, I planned to head to Parsons, avoiding all towns. I wanted to get as close as possible today so we could start out looking for Caden at first light tomorrow. It didn’t look like a long distance on paper, but between stopping to hunt for supplies and infected traps, I knew it would take time.
Between bites of egg, I traced my finger along the route and pointed out the towns I thought we should search. Molev listened to my explanation and nodded when I finished.
“We will stop outside of Parsons tonight,” he said.
My heart felt close to bursting. I couldn’t wait to hold Caden again. The thought that I might not find him tried to nudge its way forward in my mind, but I pushed it back.
After I finished eating, I quickly washed my hands and took a big drink of water. Oddly, I felt less nervous today than I had the day before. Maybe it had something to do with finally sleeping more than a few hours at a shot. Maybe it was because I knew what to expect. Or, maybe it was because I was so close to finally having my answers. Whatever the reason, I strode out the door with confidence and climbed into the truck.
The engine roared to life, a call for the fey to gather. They were all clean once more. A few of them still had wet hair from recent showers.
It was a short, uneventful ride to Rich Hill. Although we were getting closer to the area that I knew well, Rich Hill wasn’t part of it, yet. So, I was a little surprised I didn’t notice the supermarket right off the highway until Molev signaled to stop. I immediately pulled over to the shoulder. Kerr was right there when I open the door.
Safely within his arms, I watched a small group of fey approach the store. There were a few moments of quiet, followed by a moan, then nothing.
A fey stepped outside and waved us in. I tried to ignore the two bodies near the entrance and the fresh black glop of the blood stains running down the walls. It was better than having a horde of them waiting for us.
Looking around at the shelves and items scattered on the floor, the store appeared well picked over. Obviously, a store this close to the highway made it an easier raiding target.
“How much room is left in the back of the truck?” I asked.
“More than half,” Kerr answered. “Plenty of room for whatever we want to take from here.”
I hadn’t asked because we’d hit the mother lode. The shelves were mostly vacant, like the other stores we’d managed to check. The half-filled truck meant we weren’t hitting the right stores. Was that why the infected had lain in wait at those other stores but not this one? Because of the abundance of supplies?
Shaking my head and focusing on the moment, I pointed to the aisle sign that said baby.
“Buh-ay-buh-why?” Kerr said.
“Very close,” I said. “It’s buh-ay-buh-ee. Sometimes the y can sound like an e.”
He carried me to the baby aisle, and I found the infant toiletries untouched. The formula, however, was gone.
“Take all of this,” I said with a wave.
Fey moved around us and started stripping the shelves bare.
“What is it?” Kerr asked.
“Mostly diapers. Babies use them instead of underwear until they learn to use the bathroom. If we can get into one of those bigger stores, hopefully we can find some cloth ones with pins.”
“Why?”
“Babies go through a lot of diapers, and what’s left in the stores won’t last forever.”
And it wasn’t just Caden who would need the diapers. Angel’s baby needed supplies, too. And, likely, hers wouldn’t be the last baby born. I’d seen a few guards coming out of some of the single women’s tents. I chewed my lip and looked around for condoms. I found them right next to the pregnancy tests. Surprisingly, both were untouched.
“We should take those too,” I said, hoping Kerr wouldn’t try to sound out the words on the packaging.
While the fey loaded the meager supplies in the back of the truck, I waited in the cab and drank some water under Kerr’s very watchful eye. I considered him for a moment then decided to ask.
“Did you sleep next to me last night?”
Several of the fey, still moving supplies out of the store, glanced our way. The tips of Kerr’s pointed ears
darkened, and he glanced at the ground.
“Yes. I wanted you to feel safe.”
Had he acted possessive or given me some kind of long look that hinted at his continued interest in having a relationship, I would have suggested he stay on the floor the next time. But his blush and the way he tugged on his earlobe softened my answer to a simple, “Thank you.”
He nodded and closed the door. It was hard to stop watching him after that awkward exchange.
Chapter Twelve
As soon as everything was stowed, Molev signaled for me to start the engine again. We continued our way south toward Nevada.
My mind drifted between finding Caden and noticing the way Kerr’s clothes hugged his muscular frame as he kept pace with the truck.
I tore my gaze from Kerr’s impressive thighs when the forerunners’ sudden increase of speed alerted me to trouble. I squinted at the dark shape in the road ahead, but I knew better than to slow down. Keeping my speed steady, I focused on the distant obstruction. A pile of cars from the looks of things.
The fey worked as a group to move the vehicles from the road. To my surprise, the first one they moved didn’t slide over to rest on the shoulder but fell out of view. A bridge? No sooner had that car disappeared than infected poured out of the nearby trees and onto the road.
Like the day before, this group clustered around the fey in a coordinated effort. However, they still didn’t stand a chance. The fey tore through the infected like they were swatting down flies. From within the jumbled mass of struggling bodies, heads flew in all directions.
I gripped the steering wheel tightly and braced myself as I plowed through those too stupid to move. The jolting ride over the bodies and the splatter on the windshield churned the eggs in my stomach. As soon as I was on the other side, I used the wipers to clear my view then took a drink of water to keep my breakfast down.
After that, the roads were relatively free of problems.
Closer to Nevada, I watched the signs I passed for any indication of a store worth raiding. I’d visited Nevada after Lilly was born and remembered bits and pieces of the town. I knew of a supercenter on the east side, not far off the highway. However, before I reached the fork to veer off near Joplin, I spotted a sign for a dollar store.
Excited, I took my foot off the gas and signaled so that the fey running behind me would know that I was pulling over. Someone called to Molev, and the forerunners turned around as I parked.
“What is it?” Kerr asked when I opened the door. “Are you hungry? Do you need to use a bathroom?”
I smiled at his concern.
“No. I’m okay. That’s a type of supply store, too,” I said, indicating the building beside us.
He grunted and lifted me down from the cab.
Like the supermarket, the dollar store had been picked over as well. The useful things like razors and toothbrushes were missing along with anything edible. However, I found plenty of other supplies that Whiteman could use and some more baby essentials, including diaper pins and cloth diapers.
After making sure the back was infected-free, Kerr waited for me to use the bathroom and then returned me to the truck. I took a few minutes to grab a quick bite from the snacks Molev had left for me then started down the road once more.
Today was definitely shaping up better than the day before. It gave me hope for the next day. Maybe my luck was finally changing.
I took the fork to Joplin as I’d planned and skirted the rural, industrial side of Nevada. I hoped less houses and off the beaten path meant the infected hadn’t swarmed the store, looking to set a trap.
Turning onto a road that paralleled the back side of the store, I cut the engine.
I smiled down at Kerr when he opened the door and readily hopped down into his embrace.
“I have a good feeling about this one,” I said.
* * * *
Unlike the night before, I was more than ready to get inside the house Molev had found for me. The lights were on, and the guys were cleaning it out. I waited impatiently in Kerr’s arms, trying to keep as still as possible. My skin itched. Probably from the dozens of baby wipes he’d scrubbed over every inch of my exposed skin when I’d accidently gotten splattered with infected blood.
I glanced at the truck, and the fey who was hosing it off, and shuddered.
“I’m sorry, Cassie,” Kerr said, yet again.
“There’s nothing to be sorry for. You guys were amazing. I just wasn’t fast enough with the window. They came out of nowhere.”
I patted Kerr’s back with the arm wrapped around his shoulder.
“If not for you, I wouldn’t be here. You’re keeping your word Kerr. And I can’t begin to tell you how grateful I am.”
As soon as one of the fey waved that it was clear, Kerr carried me inside and set me on my feet.
“Point me to the nearest bathroom,” I said to one of the fey who’d checked the house.
He indicated a door to our right. However, it was only a half bath.
“Is there one with a shower? I need to wash.”
“Upstairs, Cassie. Third door on the left.”
“Thanks.”
Kerr moved to pick me up, but I stopped him.
“Can I walk this time? You can go first, though.”
As soon as I said it, I thought of his butt and blushed. My staring had gotten me into a lot of trouble today.
Kerr was getting under my skin in a way he would probably celebrate. With all this carrying me around, gentle touches, and heart-melting consideration, of course I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Or looking at him, apparently. I’d been mid-fantasy where Kerr had his shirt off and I’d been witness to every chiseled contour of his perfect abs when I’d grown just a little too warm. The vibrations in the truck seat hadn’t helped cool my fantasy, either.
Rolling down the window shouldn’t have been a big deal. I’d just timed it horribly wrong, and everything had happened so fast. Infected pouring from the trees, running right in front of me. The squishy noises. Kerr jumping up and shielding me after the first gush. Me, hanging onto the wheel for dear life while trying not to think of what had landed on my left sleeve.
I exhaled slowly, trying not to think of any of it, and kept my gaze focused on my feet when Kerr started up the stairs. It was a struggle not to look up at his ass. He had a very nice one.
Why was I having these thoughts? Why now? And why of Kerr? He was the last person I would have ever thought I’d be staring at the way I’d done most of today. I blamed it on him sleeping beside me the night before just so I would feel safe. Lee had never shown that level of consideration for my thoughts and feelings. Obviously not since he did ask me for a divorce when I was just a few weeks pregnant.
I needed to get my head on straight. I needed to focus on the task at hand. We were so close. Just outside of Parsons. First thing in the morning, we would start the search for my son. Maybe that’s why I was distracting myself today? Because, even though I refused to think something might have happened to him, it was still there in the back of my mind.
That depressing thought had my footsteps slowing as I followed Kerr down the hallway, right past the third door. I said nothing as he walked into the master and checked the bathroom there before motioning me inside.
The soft click of the bathroom door closing brought me out of my dark thoughts. I looked around the modest room, noting how untouched everything was. Not wanting to dwell on what might have happened to the people who once lived here, I turned on the water and waited a minute to see if it would warm. To my surprise, it did.
I eagerly stripped out of my dirty clothes and stepped into the steaming spray of water. It felt like heaven. And, I realized that since living with the fey, a lot of things had started feeling like heaven. Sleeping in a house and in a real bed. Feeling safe. Eating foods I never thought I’d eat again. And showering. Things that I’d taken for granted in my life before the earthquakes…but never again. I’d treasure each normal moment a
nd commit it to memory for when moments weren’t so normal.
I used the body wash on the shower shelf and soaped up twice. After I rinsed, I conditioned my hair for the first time in ages. Another heavenly moment.
When I turned off the water, the darker thoughts that wanted to weigh on my mind were further from the surface, despite the dimming light outside the bathroom window. I found a towel and dried off, enjoying the feeling of being clean and warm.
It wasn’t until I had wrapped my hair that I realized my mistake. All I had were the dirty clothes piled on the floor, and I really didn’t want to put any of those back on.
I glanced at the door and tugged the towel from my hair. This wouldn’t be the first time I had to make a naked, mad dash for clothing. Although, previous instances had been post-sex and not wanting to get caught by Lilly. Definitely a lifetime ago.
With the towel securely wrapped around me, I cracked the door open an inch. The bedroom door was now closed and the room empty. I remembered Kerr’s comment about privacy the night before and thanked my good luck.
With the coast clear, I hurried to the dresser. I found clean underwear, some sweatpants, and a t-shirt. It didn’t matter that they were all men’s clothing. Clean underwear was clean underwear. I dropped my towel, intent on dressing before Kerr knocked for dinner.
A low moan came from behind me as I bent to step into the underwear. I spun around in terror, one hand at my throat and the other in front of me as if I could stave off an infected attack.
Instead of an infected, I saw Kerr standing just outside the walk-in closet. His hands were fisted at his sides and a set of women’s clothes lay at his feet. Relief flooded me.
“Oh, thank God it’s you.” I placed my hand on my chest to subdue my heart’s attempt at escape.
A slow darkness consumed his ears and spread to his face. He was cute when he blushed.
The reason why he blushed registered a moment later.
I gasped and slapped my hands over my breasts.
“I’m so sorry!”
