There was a complete and uncomfortable silence in the room. Not knowing what to say, Arielle and Jane just stood there waiting for someone to speak. They looked at each other and instinctively moved closer together, reaching out to touch hands.
Annabel moved with elegance as she descended the staircase. Then she looked directly at them and held their attention. It was as if they were transfixed and couldn’t move.
Arielle felt lightheaded and weak. She suddenly felt she couldn’t breathe, as if there were no oxygen in the room. Her nostrils were filled with the strange smell of death, and all she could think was that she needed to get away from this place as quickly as possible. She told herself that her imagination was running wild, but her thoughts ran in a panic. What is her relationship to Sebastian? Does she know how I feel about him? Does she know all the wonderful things he has whispered to me? These questions raced through her head as she fought the feeling of dread that was sweeping through her body.
As that feeling became stronger, she wanted to run away. She wondered what would happen if she fainted right then and there. Finally Annabel spoke. When she did it was in a very cold voice that struck terror in both Arielle and Jane.
“What are you doing here?” she asked.
Suddenly Arielle knew she had made a big mistake in going there. There was no way she could explain why she was there, why she wanted to see the house. But she collected her thoughts as well as she could and replied as calmly as she could, trying to keep her voice from shaking. “Hello,” she said. “My name is Arielle and this is my friend Jane. We visited a bookstore in town and we saw a book that had some very interesting history about this house. The bookseller advised us that it would be a wonderful thing to visit the house and experience its greatness up close. We are sorry for the intrusion and we very much appreciate the time Mrs. Wilson has taken to show us around.”
She knew that she had told Mrs. Wilson an entirely different story, but she was terrified to use the same lie with Annabel. All she could do was pray that Mrs. Wilson wouldn’t say anything about her lie.
“How do you know my husband?” Annabel continued frigidly.
The question hit Arielle as if someone had just punched her in the stomach. She didn’t care anymore about being caught in a lie; all she cared about right now was what she had just been asked. What did she mean by her “husband”? She couldn’t be referring to Sebastian. She was sure that was not a possibility at all.
“I’m not sure that I know your husband,” she said.
“I thought I heard you tell Mrs. Wilson that you were a friend of Sebastian’s?”
Arielle swallowed the lump in her throat. “Oh yes,” she mumbled as her heart crashed to the floor. She knew she had to say something and get out of there as quickly as possible before she fell apart completely.
“We…. We met a couple of days ago in town,” she stammered. “He also told me about your beautiful home, and I wanted to see it.”
Annabel smiled at Arielle with a look that was full of smug satisfaction, and something else too, something strange that Arielle couldn’t fully grasp.
“Thank you so much, Mrs. Wilson,” Arielle managed to say. Then she took Jane’s hand and they walked, nearly running, for the door. Once outside they broke into a run and didn’t stop running until they were out of sight of the house. They both tried to catch their breath as thousands of questions filled Arielle’s mind.
She had started to feel sick to her stomach and she wanted nothing more but to be back in her room, alone, where she could gather the pieces of her broken heart.
She was sure now that all the things Sebastian had told her were lies. And she had believed all those lies, just like a sixteen-year-old schoolgirl. She vacillated between anger and confusion, still not able to really believe that she had been fooled.
They got home as the sun was going down. Arielle went straight to her room without talking to anyone and closed the door. She wanted to be alone, and she wanted to think. She wanted to cry…oh, what a fool she had been!
So it had been just a summer dream, nothing more. Tomorrow they were leaving, and she was sure this would be the last time she would ever come to St. Jean de Luz. It would take a long time to forget someone like Sebastian. She never wanted to come back to a place that would remind her of the feelings she had held for him and the love that she now knew only existed in books.
Her eyes were full of tears as she thought about how easy it had been for him to make her fall in love with him, make her feel that he was her Darcy. She was sure he must have had a good laugh about the whole thing. Now she was angry, so angry that she was trembling.
She had been just a joke to him. Oh, what a fool I’ve been! she thought over and over again. That night, she recorded a short note in her journal.
August 12
I waited for this astonishing feeling for as long as I can remember. I’m shattered at the thought that I grasped it only to lose it again in a short moment. The profound awareness of my heart being shattered into a million pieces is unbearable. I don’t have the strength to gather the fragments, and I still don’t want to give up Sebastian.
Today has to be one of the worst days in my life. I’ve lost the man I fell deeply and irrevocably in love with. A million words can’t describe this awful pain. I lost the man who moved into my very essence and imprinted his name in my very soul. I let him in without any reservations. Oh, God! What am I going to do? I’m madly in love with him. He lied about me being his Lizzy, he didn’t show up as he promised, and his rejection is shearing my body apart layer by layer. The pain is unbearable, the tears unstoppable, and the void huge. I’m frustrated and so profoundly disappointed in myself, believing his lies like a reckless schoolgirl.
Then she closed her journal, and, hugging her pillow, cried and cried until sleep claimed her.
That night she slept badly. She dreamed of Sebastian, and he looked so sad. In her dreams he kept calling her name and reaching out for her but she couldn’t get close to him. Every time she fell back to sleep she had the same dream and it would make her wake up in a cold sweat, looking around the room, expecting him to materialize in front of her. It was a very bizarre dream, yet it seemed real enough to keep her awake all night long.
Finally it was morning, and she had to get up and start preparing for the trip home. She was already packed. Her parents had told her they would leave around eleven o’clock to be sure to have enough time to catch their flight. Then she heard a knock on the door and heard Jane’s voice, asking if she could come in.
“Yes, come on in, darling!”
Jane looked upset as she walked through the door. Without even saying good morning, she said, “Arielle, I had the strangest dream about the lady we met yesterday at the Gaulle estate.”
Arielle stopped combing her hair and looked at her. “What was it, Jane?” she asked.
“She was telling me to warn you to stay away from Sebastian,” Jane said, giggling nervously.
“Oh, I can believe that,” Arielle said, laughing too. “She scared me, too,” she added, faking a smile. “Don’t worry about that. Just go and get ready. We should be leaving shortly.”
Jane came over to her and gave her a big hug. “I love you, Arielle! You are just like a sister to me!”
“I love you too, Jane,” Arielle replied and hugged her back, patting her comfortingly.
The day was very warm and they left for the airport shortly after ten-thirty. As they got further away from their summer home it occurred to Arielle that she had ceased to believe that there was anything for her in St. Jean de Luz.
Sebastian now seemed like a dream that would never come true. She could not erase her feelings for him, and she didn’t think that she would ever feel the same way for another man. Her heart was broken, and the emptiness that she had felt before she met him was back again.
Chapter 13
THEY HAD BEEN BACK HOME in Brighton for less than a couple of hours when the phone rang. Gabby’s vo
ice was exactly what Arielle needed to hear. Gabby talked nonstop for the longest time until she realized that she had not given Arielle a chance to even say a word.
“I’m sorry, Arielle, I’m just so happy you’re home. I have so much I want to share with you that I haven’t given you a chance to talk,” she finally said. “Have you been home long?”
“Only for a couple of hours.”
“Can I come over?” Eagerness was evident in Gabby’s voice.
“I wish you would,” Arielle said with a chuckle, knowing that she needed to talk to Gabby about her own news. But it sounded like Gabby had something exciting she couldn’t wait to share, and Arielle didn’t want to ruin her friend’s exciting news if that were the case.
“Are you all right? You sound a bit down,” Gabby said.
“Um…I need a friend right now,” Arielle allowed.
“Oh! Is something wrong?”
“I’d rather talk when you get here,” Arielle said, adding, “There is a lot to tell you.”
“I’ll be right over,” Gabby promised.
It seemed as if Arielle had just put the phone down when she saw Gabby walking through her bedroom door. They ran into each other’s arms and immediately Arielle’s eyes welled up. Gabby looked at her in shock.
“Arielle! You look terrible! Your eyes look like you’ve been crying for days. Are you okay?”
Arielle drew in a deep breath and tried to hold back her tears. “I’m alright,” she said. “I’d rather listen to your good news first though. What happened? You look radiant, you look absolutely great!”
“Oh, I’m so happy I can hardly talk,” Gabrielle gushed.
“Did something exciting happen to you on holiday?”
“Well not exactly on holiday,” Gabrielle said. “As it turned out we spent only about five weeks in Italy. Then we had to come back because something unexpected came up with Daddy’s practice. So I spent the rest of the summer here. I thought it was going to be a complete bore, but as it turned out, it has to be the best summer of my entire life.”
Her voice was so excited that Arielle couldn’t wait to hear the details. She felt like she needed some good news.
“Two weeks ago Stephanie had a party and she invited many of our friends from school. I really didn’t want to go but I had nothing else to do. But Arielle, this party changed my life.” She looked radiant. Arielle had really never seen Gabrielle look so happy before.
“So what happened?”
“There is a new guy on campus. His name is Troy Vasser and oh, Arielle, I’m in love!” she squealed, squeezing her eyes shut as if trying to bring up his image in her mind. Then she squeezed Arielle’s hands.
“Details, please!” Arielle said, squeezing Gabby’s hands back excitedly.
“He is unbelievably gorgeous, and I’m not exaggerating. You’ll see for yourself. He looks like he isn’t even a real human being. He’s so beautiful! He is tall; he’s got brown hair and hazel eyes. I saw him walk in and he took my breath away. His eyes locked with mine instantly, as if he were looking for me. I was so mesmerized I thought I was going to die.” She stopped, as if remembering, then giggled.
“He walked right up to me and introduced himself. We talked for a long time, just enjoying each other’s company. We danced practically the whole night, and he took me home when the party was over.” She had a beautiful smile on her face and her eyes were shining.
“I hope he’s not like Marcus,” Arielle said. Something about the way Gabby was describing her new love made her a little uneasy.
“No…Not at all, you’ll see.”
“Then what happened, tell me more!” Arielle giggled. She was so happy for her friend, she momentarily forgot her own misery.
“Well, the next day he came over to borrow a book that we had talked about the night before. And he asked me if I wanted to go to the cinema. That was our first date.”
“Did you have a good time?”
“He is Italian and he’s gorgeous!” Gabby said, completely ignoring the question she had been asked as another brilliant smile spread across her face.
“He hasn’t been here for very long, but he’s so nice, he has already made a lot of friends. We seem to have a lot in common and we love being together. I have seen him almost every day now since the party. He is intelligent, passionate, and an amazing kisser.” She chuckled again softly.
“I have put every effort into finding something that I don’t like about him and truly, Arielle, he is perfect in every way. I’m crazy about him! I’m completely and utterly in love with him. I have never felt this way before. I can’t wait to see him each and every day. If I don’t see him I feel empty and unhappy, as if he somehow makes the whole world magical. I lose every thought I ever had when I’m in his arms. He is so freaking perfect!” She smiled softly, and Arielle knew exactly how she felt. She hugged her friend with excitement.
“I’m so happy for you, Gabby, and I can’t wait to meet him.”
“Well, now tell me what happened with you,” Gabby said, breaking away from their embrace and looking at Arielle curiously. “You seem sad.”
“Well unlike yours, I think this was the worst summer of my life,” Arielle said. “My heart is broken and I don’t know how I will ever find a way to repair the damage.”
“What’s wrong? Who broke your heart?”
“I fell in love this summer with the most beautiful man on this earth. And he was in love with me too, or at least he said he was…” She blurted out the words, hesitantly at first, and then in a sort of rush. “And now my heart is shattered into a million pieces,” she concluded, breaking into tears and sobbing uncontrollably.
“Arielle! You never called me? I never knew you were in love,” Gabrielle said. She was looking at her friend in amazement, the joy now gone from her face, replaced with concern.
“Gabby, this is the man I’ve dreamed about my whole life. The man I have been waiting for, the one who completes the blueprint of my existence! I feel like I’ve been struggling for years trying to find him.”
“Is he French or English?”
“He’s French, and his name is Sebastian. He walked up to me at the beach last week and for the next four days he turned my world upside down. He made me feel like I had never felt before. He made me think that we had been looking for each other all of our lives. He made me feel just the way you have been describing when you are with Troy.”
“He sounds wonderful! So why are you so sad? And why is your heart broken?”
“He had to go away on business, but he promised to come to my parents’ party the weekend before we left. But then he never showed up,” she said. She stopped, fighting back the tears that were threatening to start all over again, but it was in vain. As she succumbed to hot tears of hurt and frustration once again, Gabrielle reached over and squeezed her hand, her beautiful face now clouded over with concern for her friend. “I tried to see him again in the next couple of days, but he never came back to the beach. Then I decided to take Jane Wainwright with me to visit his family estate, thinking that he might be there and that I would get a reasonable explanation. He wasn’t there when I went, but I found out that he’s married to one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen…” Another torrent of tears made it difficult for her to continue. “I’m devastated,” she concluded. “I wish that I had never met him.”
“You didn’t see him or talk to him before you left?”
“I didn’t. And now I feel like the pieces of my heart are scattered all over St. Jean de Luz. How am I ever going to get over him? I am so hurt and so angry I could scream.”
Gabrielle just looked at her friend, her eyes full of love and understanding. Arielle saw how bad Gabby felt for her, but there was nothing she or anyone could say to make her feel better. She was glad Gabby was there, though, because she knew she needed to get this heartache off her chest. So she kept talking.
“He was romantic, beautiful, attentive. He said everything I was longing to
hear, everything that made me fall in love with him. He said he was looking for the special girl that would make him happy for the rest of his life.” With these words she began once again to sob softly.
“How can I go on, Gabby? How can I concentrate in school? Why did this have to happen to me?” Tears were rolling down her face and she couldn’t stop.
Gabrielle put her arms around Arielle and was silent. They stayed holding each other as she cried for a long time. Finally Gabby pushed her friend back softly and handed her a tissue.
“Pull yourself together and let’s think about this, Arielle,” she said. “What do you know about him?”
“Not much at all. I found a book about his family but I didn’t purchase it.”
“Okay then, let’s start with that,” Gabrielle said in a very matter-of-fact tone of voice.
“What do you mean?”
“Let’s go to a bookstore tomorrow and try to find the same book again.”
“But how would that give us any clue about Sebastian?”
“Sometimes family secrets say a lot about the family members,” Gabby said, looking at her significantly.
“Okay, let’s do it,” Arielle agreed. Then she continued with her story, telling Gabby all the details of her meetings with Sebastian, and the words that had been exchanged between them. She cried again as she remembered how wonderful it had been to be with him. Once again she could feel her emotions taking over her.
“Oh, Gabby!” she moaned through her hands as she covered her mouth, trying to suppress the sound of her sobbing, “I’ll never be the same person again!”
“Arielle, you need to pull yourself together,” Gabrielle said, handing her a tissue. “There may be a very good explanation for why he didn’t show up. Please don’t cry any more.”
Then she held Arielle’s hand while she calmed down, waiting for her to stop feeling sorry for herself. Arielle reached over and embraced her. How lucky she was to have a friend like Gabby!
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