by Mari Carr
“She told us she wasn’t going to call. She needed to get away. Completely. We can’t be angry at her for that. We supported the decision. Told her she was smart to take a break from all of it.”
“She was smart to get away from her nutjob parents, but cutting us off—”
“We both kissed her, Cal. At the same damn time. Only a few days after Johnnie’s funeral. If that’s not adding heat and pressure to a pot that was already boiling over...”
Caleb ran a hand through his hair. “I still don’t know why we fucking did that. I’ve played it over and over in my mind until I’ve nearly gone crazy.”
Tyson didn’t reply. He couldn’t without revealing that he didn’t regret the kiss at all. He loved every second of kissing Harley, and then—shockingly—watching Caleb do the same. It had impacted him in ways he’d never anticipated.
“So we’ll clear the air,” Caleb added. “Tell her it was a mistake and life can go back to normal.”
Tyson knew what Caleb considered “normal”, but that standard had changed for him. He’d had too much time to consider what could be.
So he decided to buy himself some time. They’d kissed Harley just one time. Jesus. It wasn’t like it was the end of the world or an earth-shattering occurrence. It was a kiss. Well, two actually.
Two long, heated, tongue-tangling, overwhelming kisses that had been cut short and then left on the back burner for way too long.
Perhaps Tyson had built it up in his mind, and maybe he’d spent too much time studying his cousin Jeannette’s unusual relationship with her firefighters, Luc and Diego. But kisses like that never ended with just the kiss. They led to more. Like rip off all your clothes and fuck like bunnies for twenty years more.
“Fine. We’ll clear the air.” Tyson didn’t say more, lest he give himself away.
For a moment, things appeared to be settled. Caleb turned away from him, leaning back in the Adirondack, staring at the lake.
Tyson did the same, though the peaceful scene wasn’t making a dent in easing his anxiety.
“She was tense last night,” Caleb said after several minutes.
Tyson had noticed that as well. While she’d put on a cheery front, they both knew her well enough to see deeper.
“Yeah. I wondered if it was her dad’s presence in the house. She wasn’t expecting him to be there. Figure it kind of marred her homecoming.”
“Maybe.”
While Mr. Mills had eaten dinner at the table, he’d been quiet during the meal and had excused himself afterwards, spending the rest of the evening in his room.
Clearly Caleb wasn’t happy with that answer. “I can’t put my finger on it, but something tells me she’s looking to make some changes. What if she decides to move to Florida permanently?”
Tyson wouldn’t—couldn’t—let that happen. The time without her here in Maris had been hell. He was in no hurry to repeat it. “We’ll convince her not to.”
Caleb seemed to consider that, and then, slowly, he nodded. “Yeah. We will.”
Tyson felt a ridiculous sense of relief that at least on that front, they were united. Caleb might not want to explore the relationship angle or expand on those incredible kisses, but at least he agreed that Harley belonged in Maris.
And then, because he couldn’t deny the truth to himself, he added “with them” to that opinion.
Caleb took a sip of his coffee. “How come you never brought up that day in the barn?”
Tyson lifted one shoulder in a shrug. “Same reason you didn’t bring it up either, I guess. I didn’t know how you felt about Harley, and I didn’t want to take the chance that you’d cut me off as well.”
Caleb snorted as if Tyson had said something really stupid. “I wouldn’t do that. We’re best friends, Ty. Always have been.”
“Are you so sure we can both just walk away from her?”
Caleb sighed. “We have to. She won’t choose between us. And fuck if I’d ask her to. Last night, for the first time in a long time, my life felt right. I mean, sure, it’s fucked up, but…” Caleb seemed to struggle for the words. “When the three of us are in a room together, everything just feels…easy.” He leaned his head back against the chair. “That’s a stupid word, but I spend so much of my day living up to other people’s expectations of me—my folks, our customers, our employees. That all goes away around you two, and I can just be me.”
Tyson understood the sentiment only too well. The Feed and Seed was just one of the profitable businesses the Hott family owned and operated in Maris, which meant Caleb’s father—along with Tyson’s dad, Judge Sparks—were pillars in the community, larger-than-life men who everyone looked up to. Their dads both served on the city council, were officers of the local Lion’s Club, and they attended church every Sunday.
And as they got older and more established in their own careers, Tyson and Caleb had assumed some of those same attributes. The expectation was they would follow in their fathers’ footsteps, take leadership positions in Maris and serve as role models for the community.
Dr. Tyson Sparks and businessman Caleb Hott, the crown princes. No pressure there.
Tyson blew out a long breath. “I feel the same way, Cal. Things are good when it’s just the three of us.”
“So we walk away.” Even as Caleb spoke the words, Tyson feared it would be impossible for him to give up a dream he’d held on to, had let develop into full-grown desire. Walking away wasn’t in his nature. Problem was, he also had a strong sense of right and wrong and, while he was starting to view their situation in shades of gray, he knew there were a lot of folks in town who would not.
Finally, after several tense moments, Tyson nodded. Maybe if he spoke the words, he’d believe them; maybe he’d find the strength to take that first step away. “Yeah. I guess we do.”
Chapter Four
Caleb glanced toward the front window when headlights flashed along the living room wall. He and Tyson were kicked back in front of the news, winding down from a long day at work.
Four days had passed since Harley’s return to Maris, yet neither of them had managed to snag a few minutes alone with her to talk. Both he and Tyson were spending long hours at work—something they’d let get out of hand when Harley was gone. They had tried to meet up with her for lunch or dinner every single day, but she’d offered up excuse after excuse.
Tyson had brought it up as they ate their dinner on their laps in front of repeats of The Daily Show, wondering aloud if she was avoiding them.
Caleb had worried about that as well, and they’d decided that—come hell or high water—the girl was going to sit down for a meal with them tomorrow. The damn kiss conversation was long overdue and the sooner they got everything out in the open, the sooner he could start getting some sleep at night. Tossing and turning was not his style, but that was all he could manage this week.
Tyson lowered the footrest of the recliner and went to answer the knock at the door. “Wonder who that could be at this time of night.”
Caleb stood up as well when he heard Harley’s voice.
“Of course, you’re not bothering us. Why would you even ask that? Cal and I were just talking about you over dinner.”
Harley preceded Tyson into the living room, smiling when she spotted him.
“Hey, Caleb,” she said walking over to give him a friendly hug.
“What’s up, buttercup?” Caleb forced the light-hearted tone and was careful to keep the embrace she offered a quick one. Both things were hard to do. For one thing, simply seeing her face again had his dick going hard, and when she leaned closer he caught a whiff of something sweet—peaches?—that made him want to hold her longer, just so he could smell her hair. Jesus.
He’d told Tyson they had to walk away from her, from whatever this was. It was the only way to preserve the friendships. What he hadn’t expressed was how fucking hard that was going to be for him.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been able to connect with you guys this week,” H
arley said as she sat on the couch.
Caleb dropped back down in his recliner, but Tyson claimed the spot on the other end of the couch.
“Sounds like you’ve been busy,” Tyson said. “Everything okay on the farm?”
Harley nodded. “Oh, yeah. Everything’s great there. You know Granddad. He runs a tight ship. I never had that many actual chores. Someone needed to be in the house most days with Johnnie, so I’m pretty sure my trip to Florida didn’t even cause a ripple in the day-to-day routine.”
Caleb didn’t like to hear Harley downplaying her role on the farm, or how much her presence there meant. Once again, he was struck by the difference in Harley. She had devoted her life to Johnnie, and, while it gave her no pleasure to admit it, to her parents as well. From the time she was fourteen until just over a year ago, she’d been the glue in her family. Not that they’d all stuck together. It was more like they’d simply stuck to her, clung to her for support and guidance and anything else they needed. And Harley had carried them along, never breaking under the weight until Johnnie died. “Your granddad missed you like crazy, Harl.”
“Oh, I know that. And I missed him. It’s just…I actually haven’t been at the farm all that much.”
“What have you been doing?” Tyson asked.
Harley didn’t answer right away. Instead, she took a deep breath, her gaze traveling from Tyson to Caleb and back again.
“Harley?” Caleb leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. If she told them she was planning to move away, he’d—God—he’d…
Well, he wasn’t sure what he’d do. Lose his temper and tell her she couldn’t leave them again. That would be the first thing. Begging came to mind as well, though he didn’t like to admit that.
For a brief second, he considered kidnapping her, tying her to his bed until he convinced her to see reason. He dismissed that thought as soon as it flashed because it had his cock growing even thicker and his damn jeans were already uncomfortable.
Tie her to the bed? Not a chair?
Yeah. This was fucked up.
“What are your plans?” he asked.
“I’m afraid you guys will think I’m crazy.”
“As long as it doesn’t include leaving Maris, we’ll be fine with it.” Tyson spoke the words Caleb was thinking.
Harley frowned. “Leaving Maris? What? No. Hell no. This is my home. I don’t have any intention of leaving here again.”
For the first time since he’d seen Harley at her granddad’s house, Caleb was able to get some air all the way to his lungs. He could breathe again.
“I’ve been driving around with Bugsy, looking at property to rent,” she finally said.
“For what?” Caleb asked. Bugsy was his family’s property manager, and Caleb was a bit annoyed the man hadn’t thought to tell him about Harley. Which was stupid, because Bugsy ran the rental end of things exclusively. He never conferred with Caleb or his dad unless there was an issue. And thanks to Bugsy’s efficiency, issues were few and far between.
“For the store I hope to open on Main Street. And for a place to live.”
Caleb got stuck on the store part. Tyson, meanwhile, found something way more dangerous to latch onto. “You’ll live here,” he said.
Caleb’s gaze flew to Tyson, the words, “What the fuck is wrong with you?” poised on his lips.
Harley beat him to the punch. She laughed, shook her head and said, “Wow. No way. That’s a big hell no.”
Her quick dismissal of the idea should have set Caleb’s mind at ease. Instead, it annoyed him. “Why not?”
Harley clearly hadn’t expected Caleb to agree with Tyson’s offer. In fact, he didn’t agree, but knowing what was smart and not saying the opposite wasn’t a skill he possessed. He knew what was right. But apparently his dick was the bigger man right now, and it had decided to do the talking.
Harley crossed her arms and sighed. “Fine. You know what, it’s time. Let’s do this. We kissed. All three of us. At the same time.”
And just like that, Caleb was sorry he’d pushed the issue of her living situation. He wasn’t ready to talk about the kiss. He’d never be ready. Discussing it with Tyson had been hard enough because so much of what Caleb said had felt like lies.
“It was a mistake,” he said slowly, the words coming out thick and heavy. It had been a mistake. But not one he regretted. Not even a little bit.
Tyson looked like he wanted to disagree, but Harley didn’t give him a chance.
“I know. I was a mess that day. You have no idea how sorry I am. I hope you guys can forgive me for…” The words faded.
Forgive her? What the fuck?
Caleb ran through that afternoon in his mind again, trying to figure out where Harley got the idea it was she who’d done anything wrong…
* * *
Caleb sat on the hay bale, watching his two best friends kiss, and he knew in that moment that everything they’d ever thought was real had been a lie. He wasn’t jealous of Tyson, and he wasn’t embarrassed to be a witness to something they might prefer to do alone. He wasn’t angry with them for potentially changing the status quo, and he wasn’t going to get up and walk away to give them privacy.
He wasn’t going to do anything smart.
The moment her lips left Tyson’s, Caleb turned her toward him and added his own fuel to the flames. For a split second, he wondered what Tyson would do. Would he hit him, pull them apart, yell? Would he be the one to walk away?
Those thoughts disappeared in an instant when Harley parted her lips and her tongue touched his. Jesus. He’d never been much of a fan of kissing. In his experience, fucking was way more fun than the stuff that came before. With one kiss, one touch, Harley proved that wrong. Big time.
She tasted like strawberry ice cream, smelled like the fresh morning air in spring, and as his fingers slid over the soft skin of her arms, he was reminded of new, clean cotton sheets pulled right from the dryer. Warm, comforting, soothing.
No matter how much he loved kissing her, Caleb couldn’t ignore the sensation of Tyson’s gaze on them. His friend was watching them the same way he’d watched Tyson kiss Harley. Was Tyson feeling the same thing? The same arousal?
Caleb had watched them knowing he’d never seen anything hotter in his life. And kissing her only sealed the deal, solidified one piece of knowledge that he would never be able to shake.
That he’d never been anywhere righter in his life.
It was maddening, smoldering, steamy, sexy-as-hell insanity.
He gripped her waist tightly, his fingers drifting beneath her T-shirt, seeking skin. Once he found it, he got greedy. Wanted more. He moved them higher, wanting to feel her breasts the way Tyson just had. He took her nipples between his fingers—only the thin cotton of her bra between—and pinched lightly. In his mind, he already had the three of them naked and rolling around in the hay.
The three of them.
That thought gave him a pause and Harley sensed it.
She broke the kiss. Tyson hadn’t noticed her hesitance and there was no denying he would have dragged her back into his arms, gone in for a second round. Hell, apparently both he and Tyson were ready to push her down and take it a hell of a lot further than just kissing, but Harley stood up rapidly and stepped away from them, stumbling slightly in her haste to put some distance between them.
Neither he nor Tyson moved, both afraid of shattering whatever it was that had just happened.
Harley’s expression didn’t reflect theirs. Hers was one of numb confusion. And that’s when Caleb saw the first crack, the first fissure.
As far as timing went, theirs sucked. Her brother had just died, her dad had gone on a weeklong bender wreaking havoc all over town, and her mother had decided—for the hundredth time—to leave Art. That decision had lasted all of five days—just long enough for Harley to move her into a new apartment—before her mom decided she wanted to go back. Something she no doubt expected Harley to make happen for her.
She stared at them for several long, painful moments—and then she laughed. Hysterically. Laughed until she cried. And once she started sobbing, there didn’t seem to be an end to her misery.
Caleb stood there dumbstruck, kicking himself for being such an asshole. Tyson moved first, reaching out to pull her into his arms, but she broke free of his grip, moving farther away.
“I c-can’t do this. P-please.”
Her tear-filled eyes sent daggers through him. Caleb would have done anything—given anything—to take away her pain.
“I have to go,” she said. And then, just like that, she was gone.
* * *
Harley had called each of them the next day, told them she was going to Florida for a little while to stay with her aunt. When he’d asked her how long she would be away, she had told him she didn’t know. Then she had asked him not to contact her. Had begged him to give her some time to “get her shit together.” And because Caleb had been besieged by guilt, he had agreed. As had Tyson.
Maybe if more time had passed between the kiss and her departure, they would have refused her request. Would have told her they were sorry, would have insisted that pushing away their friendship at a time when she needed it most was wrong. But neither of them had done that. They had responded instead with remorse. Both of them would have given her the world on a platter that day if it would have erased the look of absolute devastation in her eyes.
“What are you apologizing for?” Caleb asked.
Harley seemed shocked that he didn’t know, but for God’s sake, what the hell was she thinking? How could she interpret any part of that day as her fault? They were the ones who’d shown up intent on comforting her, and all they’d done instead was add to the pressure and grief that was already crushing her.
“That day. The way I kissed both of you. And then the way I reacted after. I was a raving lunatic. I don’t know how to explain my behavior. It was sort of like everything in my life kept falling in on me until I imploded. Those kisses—dammit—I shouldn’t have…”
