“You saved my life, even though I wouldn’t have blamed you for letting the dragon kill me to destroy the fox demon. What I will regret the most is we never got to be friends.” Her voice cracked as tears ran down her cheeks. “After hearing all about you from Miu, I was so looking forward to meeting you and becoming friends.”
“We will be here for a little longer,” I said.
“That is very kind of you, but I’m going home and ask to have a cleansing ritual done.” Emiko’s phone beeped. “That’s my mom, she came to get me. Goodbye.”
Miu started to cry as Emiko walked away.
I faced Philip. Should I say something? Call her back? As the leader shouldn’t I fix this?
Philip shook his head. “Okay, does everyone have their stuff? We need to talk and eat.”
* * *
Miu’s aunt had been willing to make something quick for us. So we sat around the low table in the dining room eating miso soup, and bowls of noodles with vegetables and tofu in a rich garlic sauce. No one talked.
Philip sat next to me, having placed me at the end of the table. Kayin and Shin sat close enough they touched, supporting and comforting each other. Miu and Taliesin had tried to sit further away from the group, but Nyota, Michael, and Sasha sat with them. They wanted to be supportive, but Miu and Taliesin had completely closed off. Nyota kept trying to get them to eat something, but they mostly pushed their food around. Miu ate some and smiled a little. Taliesin ignored everyone until Sasha whispered something to him, then he ate but kept his eyes on his food.
Philip put his laptop on the table once we finished eating. “So I think it’s important for all of us to talk. Including Gavin and Anali, so give me a second.”
I ran my fingers through my hair. Gavin and Anali hadn’t seen it yet. How would they react?
“Hello everyone,” Gavin said. Anali waved from the screen. We all mumbled hello. I scooted back out of range of the camera.
“So,” Philip began. “We need to get this family back on track. Four people were hurting and in danger and very little was being done. After speaking to all of you I found that while you noticed and worried, only Sapphire acted. She was the only one who approached Miu, Taliesin, and Sasha trying to help them.”
“Now I understand that Miu and Taliesin were under the influence of the fox demon, so they are excused for not reaching out and trying to help. But what about the rest of you?” Philip looked at everyone. No one met his gaze but me.
“Yes, Sapphire is the leader, being the Jewel. But this is a family. You all are bonded together for life. You are all powerful descendants of Shamash and Aya. You all travel together, save lives together, and fight together. You also need to protect each other.”
“Philip, I don’t think we realized how bad Sapphire’s dreams had become,” Gavin said. “And we were keeping an eye out for the signs of depression.”
“She did show some, soon after London, but then she got better,” Anali added.
“Sapphire, who also knows the signs of depression, suddenly starts spending all her free time doing school work and gets back into the routines set for her, like she would have at the group home. And you didn’t think maybe she was hiding something?” Philip asked.
“But how could we have known?” Michael asked.
Philip rubbed his face. “So I’m going to be very blunt here. You guys felt overwhelmed and ignored clear signs of distress among each other. Sapphire is the youngest person here. She was able to retell her violent and scary dreams with no emotion. If left to make a choice, Sapphire would stay alone in her room doing school work. This is a significant change in behavior.”
I twisted my mom’s ring watching the light reflect off the silver specks in the band of midnight blue stone.
“But I checked with her, to find out if she had been throwing up?” Gavin said his voice weak.
“Sapphire, when was the last time you threw-up from a dream or vision?”
We had talked about this, what questions he would ask me. That he needed me to be honest to help bring the group back together, even though it might hurt people at first. “In London.”
“But …” Gavin said. The others gasped.
“You all judged the intensity of Sapphire’s dreams by one thing. And, yes, if she had felt able to volunteer the information it would have been helpful, but these are teenagers. Teenagers going through traumatic experiences. We all have to watch out for each other, to stop and ask questions, to really see each other.” Philip sighed. “This isn’t going to be easy. We are taught to respect people’s privacy, but we have to start taking care of each other.”
“So,” Nyota said. “When we noticed Sasha drinking and staying out late we should have tried to talk to him?”
Sasha’s face went blank, his gray eyes cold.
“Yes,” said Philip
“And if that didn’t work?” Nyota asked.
Philip looked at me.
“Then,” I said. “You come to me or Philip. We depend on one another. What would have happened if the Sons of Belial had attacked us this past week?”
“They would have won,” Shin said. “We aren’t strong enough on our own.”
“Exactly,” I touched my hair.
“Is that why you cut your hair?” Kayin asked.
“Wait. What happened to your hair?” Gavin asked.
Philip reached over and turned the computer so Gavin and Anali could see me.
“When did you cut your hair?” Anali asked. “It’s cute.”
“Thanks but, yeah, so I had a bad dream. Cartazonon has this thing about grabbing my hair. I couldn’t take it anymore.”
“Cartazonon grabs her hair,” Philip said. “And forces her to look where he wants her to.”
“And she didn’t go and get her hair cut,” Sasha said. “She hacked her braid off with a knife. I took her to get it fixed the next morning.”
“Thank you for helping to take care of her,” Philip said. “I know you probably didn’t feel like you had a lot of choices but you did your best.”
Sasha gave me lopsided smile. “We’ve been helping each other.”
I smiled back. “Yes, we’ve been there for each other.”
“What was the dream?” Anali asked as she rubbed Gavin’s back. His hands covered his face.
“Cartazonon killed a griffin in front of me. Telling me it’s my fault he had to kill him. Reminding me he’ll kill again unless I join him,” I said clasping my trembling fingers together. “He’s given me two weeks to join him before he feeds on another magical being.”
Everyone talked at once.
“It’s not your fault.”
“You can’t join him.”
“We’ll stop him.”
“Oh, Sapphire,” Anali said, tears filling her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. You being here, or me being in India won’t change my dreams,” I said before Gavin demanded I join them.
“This is what I’ve been talking about. Sapphire should have never been left to face this alone,” Philip said. “None of you should have been left alone to deal with what has been happening. And we won’t let it happen anymore.”
“So what will we do?” Miu asked.
“We will be honest,” Philip said. “We will ask for help when we can. And we will offer help to each other when we see something off. We need to protect and care for each other. We are all going through a lot. Experiencing a lot, some wonderful things, some horrific, but only together can we succeed. This means we need everyone in top shape. Physically, emotionally, and mentally.”
Guilt, anger, and heartache lay over us, suffocating the ancient layer of happiness that I normally felt in the room. It was difficult to be mad at the others knowing how much they hurt.
“So,” Taliesin said his voice rough. “We don’t get to have any privacy anymore?”
“No, that’s not what I’m saying.” Philip sighed. “As long as one person in this group is helping you and supporting you the
n I’m good. For example, I want one of you to be able to come to a group meeting and say Sapphire is having a rough time right now, but we’re talking and I’ll let someone know if things get worse. That way Sapphire doesn’t have the whole group asking how she is or worrying, but everyone is aware something is up and can keep an eyes on them in case things get worse.”
Taliesin scowled at the table but nodded.
“Tonight we aren’t going to apologize. Everyone is sorry. We know this. We aren’t going to cast blame; everyone shares in it.” Philip looked at everyone even though most of the group still focused on the table. “So, tomorrow morning is a new day. And we are going to move forward, as a family who support each other and look out for each other.”
“Sapphire,” Gavin said. “Can you call us later?”
“Sure, once I get to my room.”
“Talk to you soon sweetheart,” Anali said and they signed off.
We all got up in this awkward confused manner, not sure if we should say something or try and run for our rooms. Sasha whispered something to Philip and got a nod along with an eye roll.
“Come on Miu,” Sasha said. “We’ll take you home to your parents.”
I watched them leave, Taliesin following behind them. Philip’s hand squeezed my shoulder. “Give them tonight. They need to figure things out.”
“Do you think one night will be enough?” I waved to Kayin and Shin as they walked away, sorrow easy to see on their faces.
“It’s all they’re getting. One night of self-pity, self-righteous anger, and wallowing in guilt for their mistakes. Then tomorrow we talk to them about normal everyday things,” Philip said.
“I remember. I’ll do my best.” The train ride tomorrow was going to be uncomfortable, of course the dragons would help ease the tension.
“Hey, brother,” Michael said hugging Philip. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Hey, Uncle Philip,” Nyota said.
“I’m going to go call Gavin and Anali before they freak out,” I said.
Philip grabbed me, picking me up off the floor in a hug. “Remember, no apologies, no blame.”
“I will. ’Night guys.”
Nyota hugged me next, then Michael. Each of them wanting to apologize, but instead said good night.
* * *
“Taliesin, come on you can talk to her in the morning,” Sasha said from outside my door.
I looked at the clock, three ten. What was going on?
“I need to know,” Taliesin said his voice slurred and thick.
“I get it, and you can ask her in the morning.”
“No, I want to know now.”
I got out of bed and shuffled to the door. I wasn’t going to be able to sleep with them arguing. Pulling back the shoji screen I gasped. “What happened to the two of you?”
They each had a fat lip, various bruises, and torn shirts. Taliesin also had a cut on his cheek and Sasha a swollen eye.
Taliesin waved a hand in front of his face. “This is the price of hero-ing. I have a question for you.” He pushed past me and stumbled into my room.
“Hero-ing?”
Sasha shrugged. “The girl got away and the assholes look worse than we do, so yes, hero-ing.”
“Do I need to get a first aid bag?” There was one in Michael’s room.
Taliesin turned, his hair whipping around his face. “I need …” he swayed and fell to the floor. “I need to ask you a question.”
“Okay.” I sat in front of him. Nervousness zinged through my body. What did he want to know? “Ask away.”
“Why did you reject me?”
“What? Reject you when?”
Sasha groaned. “He’s been whining about this since his fourth sake.”
“When I wanted you to do the silks routine with me. Why did you say no? Didn’t you like the idea? I would have let you help choreograph it if you didn’t trust me. Am I not a good partner? Sasha says I am.”
“What? No, I loved your idea. I can’t wait to see it. And you’ve been great with Sasha, you two collaborate really well.”
“Then what?” Taliesin whined.
“Yeah, what?” Sasha plopped down next to us.
Embarrassment heated my face. “Because once people saw us in the program or at the signing tables no one would believe it, and I didn’t want to ruin your piece.”
Taliesin frowned then tilted his head to the side.
“Taliesin, you are stunning. I’ve been around you for months and sometimes I look at you and can’t catch my breath. No one would ever believe that you would look at me and instantly fall in love.”
Taliesin made a huffing sound and Sasha smacked the back of my head.
“Ouch, what was that for?”
“You are so stupid.” Sasha shook his head, a pitying look on his face. “Well, now you know. Can we go to bed?”
“You will do the act with me.” Taliesin grabbed my hands. “I want you to do the act with me.”
“Ask me when you’re sober, and I’ll say yes if it means that much to you. But I still think Michael could help you find someone better.”
Taliesin leaned forward and pressed his face into my cheek and made a smacking sound. “I want you.” He got up, Sasha catching his arm before he fell again and they left.
I touched my cheek. Had that been a kiss? I shook my head and crawled back into bed. No way was I going to try and figure out the drunken actions of a teenage boy in the middle of the night.
Chapter Eighteen
I expected breakfast to be awful. Full of quick glances, muttered attempts at small talk, and an awkwardness the rest of the circus performers would recognize. And it started that way until Taliesin and Sasha stumbled into the dining room.
Taliesin’s bruised pale skin had a green tinge to it. Sasha swallowed heavily and covered his nose with his hand.
“Eat up,” Philip called out much louder than normal and slapped both boys on their backs. “You need to stir the egg in before the rice cools.”
Miu’s aunt had served hot steamed rice with a raw egg, along with steamed fish, tofu, and pickled vegetables. I poured the egg in my rice and stirred it hoping the heat from the rice would cook it. And it did, a little bit, maybe, if I squinted. Using my chopsticks, I picked up some of the egg coated rice, slimy. I wrinkled my nose and ate some. Oh, yeah, no, this wasn’t going to work. I scooped some of the tofu served in a rich brown sauce and added it to my bowl.
“Have some of the veggies.” Philip held a pickle under Taliesin’s nose. Sweat broke out of his forehead.
“I don’t think Philip, or Mrs. Muto, are pleased they are hungover,” Kayin whispered.
“It doesn’t look like it.” I stirred my breakfast and ate some. It tasted much better and if I pretended that all the egg was cooked, everything would be fine.
“Fish, Sasha?” Philip asked, holding out the platter to him.
Sasha gagged.
I picked up my food and scooted away from the table.
Taking a deep breath, Sasha regained control of himself and picked up his tea taking a sip. “No, thank you.”
“Your loss.” Philip took some and began loudly chatting with Nyota.
“At least you know when he’s unhappy with you,” Shin said eating his egg and rice without adding anything to mask it. “I hope they feel better before the train ride.”
“Maybe Miu will heal them,” Kayin said. “They are both pretty beat up.”
“I must be a bad teacher,” Shin said.
“They said the other guys looked worse,” I offered. “And that the girl got away.”
“When did you talk to them?” Kayin asked.
I rolled my eyes. “Last night when they came stumbling in.”
“I’m surprised they came to breakfast at all,” Shin said watching Taliesin and Sasha as they tried to eat.
“They didn’t want to,” Kayin told us. “Philip insisted.”
“We’re leaving in twenty minutes.” Philip pressed his han
ds on Sasha and Taliesin’s shoulders to support himself as he stood. “Eat up and then we’re off to the train.”
“Sapphire, how’s your arm this morning?” Philip knelt next to me.
“Sore, but healing.” I pulled down my hoodie so he could see my upper arm. Well, the clean bandage I’d put on it.
“Good. If you need anything, let me know. I’m going to go and pack for our trip to Kyoto.” As soon as Philip left the dining room, Sasha and Taliesin pushed away their bowls.
Michael laughed. “Have fun on the train, boys. I doubt he’s done.”
Sasha groaned.
Taliesin let his hair fall around his face, hiding from us as he drank his tea.
“At least the train won’t be boring,” Shin said.
I nodded. That and if we focused on them we could ignore the uncomfortable feelings brought up yesterday. Philip might have said today was a new day, a new start, but I felt the guilt and insecurity coming from my family.
“Sapphire,” Kayin began his voice soft. “Shin and I talked and we realized that, well, we …”
“No, apologizes. Philip said,” I reminded him.
Kayin closed his eyes and nodded.
Shin cleared his throat. “We have been very wrapped up in ourselves, and that’s going to change.”
“We won’t leave you alone all the time. We’re family, and we need to take care of each other, like Philip said.” Kayin ran a hand over his tight black curls studded with ruby red curls. His hair was the same shades of black and red as mine, from the Phoenix King and Queen.
“You guys get to spend time alone; you are dating after all. And I’m sure there are things you want to be alone for,” I said. Shin grinned and Kayin looked at the table, trying to fight a smile. “I don’t mind being alone sometimes. And I’ll make sure to ask to hang out when I get lonely, or depressed, or whatever.”
Kayin wrapped an arm around my shoulders and squeezed me tight. “We’ll get it sorted out.”
I smiled at them. “Of course we will.”
Finishing my breakfast, I stood. “I’ll see you guys out front, I need to get ready.”
Kayin and Shin waved as their mouths were full of food.
I walked up the stairs to my room thinking over what I needed to take while we hiked Mt. Kurama hoping to find the tengu.
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