by J. H. Croix
If it was just the sex, I could probably stay sane. The problem was I liked him. A lot. I was walking myself straight down the plank to heartbreak. Yet, even knowing that, I wasn’t turning down the month he offered. It was too tempting.
When Liam made his teasing comment about Bradley, I got a little uncomfortable. It’s not like I had anything to hide. Hell, I’d been loud and proud about how I was scouting around for the right guy. I managed to keep my reply casual, but I sensed a thread of tension from Tristan. The bonus to that was it kind of pissed me off. He had no right to be tense about anything to do with whether or not Bradley was a friend with benefits.
I managed to reply casually to Liam and conversation moved on. I felt prickly and annoyed, which might be the only thing that kept me from doing something stupid.
I leaned back in my chair when our waitress arrived to clear our plates. When Olivia declined another glass of wine, I was slightly relieved. While the year I’d been avoiding Tristan had taken some gymnastics as far as my excuses went, tonight had been a new challenge. I didn’t want it to be known I was Tristan’s latest paramour. I knew Olivia would worry because she’d say he didn’t want what I wanted.
As it was, I’d spent most of tonight’s dinner trying to keep from ever looking in Tristan’s direction too long, lest my greedy eyes get locked onto him. I was flushed inside and out and relieved for the dim lighting. My last hurdle for the evening would be managing a graceful departure.
“Luv, you’re tired and it’s time to go,” Liam announced, curling his arm over Olivia’s shoulders and dropping a kiss on her hair.
My heart gave a little thump. I wanted a man who looked at me the way Liam looked at Olivia.
Do NOT go there. Your time will come. Don’t you dare pin those hopes on Tristan. He’s your ticket to one month of hot sex and nothing more.
If only my heart would listen.
Olivia smiled ruefully, catching my eyes across the table. “I am. I had an earlier than usual surgery schedule today, so I’ve been up since four.”
“Exactly. Let’s go,” Liam said, standing and pulling Olivia up. “Mind taking care of our bill?” he asked, his eyes on Tristan. “I’ll get the next one.”
“Got it covered, mate,” Tristan replied easily.
“Coffee in a few days,” I said to Olivia with a small wave.
They made their way out of the restaurant, leaving Tristan and me alone at the table. I’d thought the last hour or so had been an exercise in restraint. The second we didn’t have company, my body practically caught on fire.
I stood quickly. “Be right back,” I said before I hurried away to the restroom.
I used the bathroom, not because I really had to but because I needed something to do. Afterwards, I stood at the sink and ran icy cold water over my wrists and splashed it on my face. I needed something, anything, to snap me out of the feverish heat rolling through me. I left the restroom, ordering myself to politely say goodnight and leave. When I didn’t see Tristan, I felt a sense of relief followed immediately by anger. Wow. He didn’t even have the manners to face me and say goodnight. Either that, or I mattered that little to him. Yet, this wasn’t like him. He was unfailingly polite. Always.
Whatever. I grabbed my jacket and threw it on before threading my way through the tables and pushing out the door. Only to run right into someone.
“Oomph!”
I glanced up to discover the someone in question happened to be Tristan.
“I was trying to hold the door for you, but you were walking so fast I didn’t get to it in time,” he said with a low chuckle.
The sound sent a shiver up my spine. God, I had it bad. All he had to do was laugh, and I wanted him.
The heat I’d managed to dissipate inside from the icy water rolled through me again. It was damp and rainy out, and I was hot all over.
“Oh, sorry. I thought you’d left,” I said because I didn’t know what else to say.
He let the door fall closed and stepped back. We stood under a small awning outside the restaurant. I tugged my rain jacket together in front, shivering slightly. I needed the chilly, damp air to cool me off inside.
I glanced up to see Tristan shaking his head slightly.
“What?”
“I have manners you know. I wasn’t just going to sod off and leave you here without at least saying goodbye.”
Ah. So he meant to say good night. That was probably for the best, yet I instantly felt peevish about it. I didn’t stop to think and my next words tumbled out without a filter.
“Fine then. I suppose we can say we can handle dinner going forward. Let’s leave it at that.”
My tone was bitchy, and I didn’t even care.
One dark brow rose in a slash, and his eyes narrowed. “Fine then? Oh that’s rich, Daisy. How about you be straight with me and let me know you’re still keeping your friends with benefits?” he asked, his tone sarcastic and dark.
I went from peevish to pissed.
Hands on hips, I glared at him. “I’m not keeping any friends with benefits,” I countered with air quotes and a roll of the eyes. “Bradley’s a friend from work and nothing more and hasn’t been for months. You’re one to talk anyway. You’ve got your little stable of women you keep. Who the hell is Renee anyway? Apparently, she thought there was more to what you had with her.”
Tristan’s eyes widened and then narrowed. His gaze went from annoyed to angry. He looked away, shaking his head slowly, before bringing his gaze back to me. “I don’t have a stable of women, Daisy. That’s fucking ridiculous. Since you’re asking, I used to see Renee occasionally. I don’t anymore. I have no idea where you heard what you heard, but it means nothing.”
We stared at each other. I was still pissed he’d said anything about Bradley, but I was just as angry with myself. I didn’t like how much it hurt to think about someone else Tristan might have been with. I shouldn’t care about Renee, a woman I didn’t even know. It wasn’t just thinking about her that chewed me up inside, it was his quick clarification that it meant nothing. Once again, my words were skipping ahead of my brain.
“Is that what I am to you? Nothing?”
Oh shit. Not a good place to go.
He stared at me with the rain falling in a soft drizzle just beyond the edge of the awning and the lights of passing cars glittering on the wet pavement.
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing,” I mumbled, looking away.
It was a near miss, but I could gloss right past this awkward little moment.
I spun back when I felt his hand curl over my arm. In a flash, he was inches away. I looked up, and my breath hitched at the intensity in his gaze. I didn’t know how to interpret it, but it hit me hard, smack in the center of my chest.
“Nothing is about the opposite of what you mean to me.”
His words were low and fierce. We stood there, staring at each other. I didn’t know what to say to that, although my heart was thudding so hard, I feared he could hear it. The hope I kept trying to keep dormant unfurled like a flower inside. I swallowed against the wave of emotion cresting inside of me.
The door to the restaurant opened swiftly, bumping me right into Tristan. His arm slid around my waist, pulling me clear so the group of people walking out could pass by. Once they did and their voices faded as they walked down the street, he curled his hand into mine.
“Let’s go.”
There was no question I’d go anywhere with him in this moment, so I let him lead me to his car and drive me home.
Chapter 15
Tristan
The sun filtering through the curtains woke me. I opened my eyes to see the clock by Daisy’s bed read six in the morning. I rolled my head back toward Daisy and nearly groaned. Her hair was a honeyed tangle on the pillows. I was curled up behind her with her perfect, lush bottom nestled against my cock, which was waking up to this fact quite readily. Her skin was silky soft. I resis
ted the urge to stroke my palm down over the curve of her hip. Truth was, the only reason I didn’t was I happened to be cupping one of her breasts. It filled my palm, the lush weight of it tempting.
My mind spun back to last night. I was fairly certain I’d gone bloody crazy, but I didn’t care to ponder the potential problems associated with that just now. After I’d confronted Daisy about Bradley and she’d asked me about Renee, I hadn’t been able to see past anything other than the need to have her. I’d been so fucking jealous of Bradley—a man I didn’t even know. It should’ve been a relief to know they weren’t still friends with benefits, but thinking about any man being with Daisy made me fucking insane. Then, she’d gone and asked me if she meant nothing to me.
Let’s be clear. I hadn’t meant to imply Renee meant nothing to me. No woman meant nothing to me. I’d meant whatever gossip Daisy had heard was nothing and not worth considering. Renee had been a friend with benefits in the truest sense of that description, save the after the fact understanding that it appeared Renee read more into the arrangement than I had. For that, I was sorry. But it didn’t change the reality that ever since I’d gotten this second chance to see things through with Daisy, no other woman held the slightest interest for me.
As for Daisy, the idea she could even contemplate she might mean nothing to me was insane. She meant far too much, and hell if I knew what to do about it. I was highly attuned to the timeframe. I’d told her a month. A month had seemed like ample time. Yet, now it felt as if it could never be enough. It was starting to feel complicated. I couldn’t even fathom how I’d back away from her at the end of this month.
Daisy shifted against me, burrowing closer and sighing in her sleep. At the feel of her bottom, my cock hardened, and I bit back a laugh. This was ridiculous. The effect she had on me made me question my control, something I’d never had to do. But then, she seemed to have the unique ability to push me past boundaries I’d never considered crossing. Exhibit A: I didn’t spend the night with women. Too intimate, too many possible implications. Yet, here I was, waking up beside Daisy. It hadn’t even crossed my mind last night that I should leave.
I hadn’t even asked her if I could come in. I just had and then we’d all but set the sheets on fire before falling asleep together. I closed my eyes and figured my best bet was to go back to sleep. Daisy burrowed closer and made a soft sound. Fuck me. No sleep for me. Perhaps a cold shower would do the trick. It took all of my willpower to start to ease away from her. She felt so good—all warm, soft and sleepy. I managed to create perhaps an inch between us, only to have her roll over.
Bloody hell. If I thought the feel of her round bottom against me was a problem, her breasts pressing into me were even worse.
“Mmm, Tristan?”
Her sleepy murmur nearly had me rolling her over and sinking inside of her. God help me. I was in trouble. Serious trouble.
“Right here,” I managed.
Daisy pushed up on an elbow, lifting her hand and brushing her tangled hair away from her face. Her wide brown eyes were unguarded in her just-awake state. Daisy unguarded was so rare, it hit me right in the chest. My heart clenched. She tended to come across as so strong, bold and sly. Seeing her like this did something to me.
She watched me quietly. Her hand slid through the ends of her hair and fell to my chest. I couldn’t hide my arousal, so I didn’t even bother to try. After a beat, her mouth curled at one corner in that lopsided smile of hers.
Without a word, she dipped her head and proceeded to drop hot kisses on my chest, shoving the sheets out of the way as she did.
If there was one thing I was accustomed to when it came to sex, it was control. Right now, Daisy upended that and ripped it right out of my hands.
I scrambled for something to hold onto inside.
“Daisy?” I managed to choke out on a rough gasp as she curled her palm around my cock.
She lifted her head, her hair a wild tangle of honey around her face. “Yes?”
“What are you doing?”
Probably the most inane question ever right about now. My body didn’t want her to stop. At all. Yet, with control slipping through my fingers, I wasn’t thinking too clearly.
She bit her lip and her eyes took on a wicked gleam.
“This,” she said before leaning over and dragging her tongue along the underside of my cock.
I fell back into the pillows on a groan, giving myself over to her. She proceeded to drive me completely mad. I should’ve known she’d be thorough. She was a woman of attention and detail. Her tongue didn’t miss a single centimeter—long, teasing strokes and swirls, damp kisses, the hot, wet suction of her mouth when she drew my cock inside.
I forgot about control, forgot everything except the electric feel of her mouth on me and the pressure coiling so tightly inside. A slow drag of her tongue, her fist curled around me, and she drew me deep into her warm, wet mouth once more. Nothing but her name came with the roar of my release.
I dimly felt her lips making their way back up my chest and ending with a soft kiss against my neck before she curled up against me. I dragged my eyes open to find her grinning.
I was spent and managed a weak smile.
“Good morning,” she offered brightly.
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “A very good morning, I dare say,” I managed as my breath slowed.
She dropped another kiss on my neck and pushed away from me, bouncing out of bed.
That would not do. With an effort, I pushed myself up and followed her, still reeling from spending myself in her mouth. I was moving slowly enough she was already in the shower when I caught up to her in the bathroom.
I climbed in behind her, and she spun around to toss another sly grin my way.
“What’s so amusing?” I asked as she handed over the soap.
She stood under the water with soap bubbles sliding over her skin, still grinning.
“Oh, it’s nice to catch you off guard. Plus, you’ve been spoiling me, so…”
Her words trailed off, and she flushed a deeper shade of pink. With the steam, she was already pink all over, which I loved by the way.
My cock promptly forgot it had already been taken care of this morning. I stepped to her. The soap slipped from my hands, falling to the tiled floor with a thump. I slid my hands up her hips and over her belly to cup her breasts. I grinned when her breath hitched. I didn’t mind she’d turned the tables on me this morning, but I loved seeing her let go. I toyed with her nipples and followed the water down her skin. When she flexed against me and murmured my name, my control once again slipped through my fingers. I spun her around. She stumbled slightly and caught her balance on the wall. Perfect. Her lush round bottom tilted up at me. I reached between her thighs to find her hot, wet, and ready.
In a haze of need pounding through me, I positioned my cock at her entrance and was about to bury myself inside of her when reality hit me.
I stepped back so fast, I almost slipped on the wet tiles. She glanced over her shoulder.
“Where are you going?” she snapped.
“Condom,” I choked out.
I had never, ever forgotten protection. That’s how lost I was in the maelstrom of Daisy.
“Forget it. I’m totally clean and I’m on the pill. I know you’re clean too because you guys are treated like royalty by your doctors. Just fuck me.”
I stared back at her. In the far reaches of my mind, a voice tried to speak up, but I ignored it. Oh, I wasn’t worried about protection per se. No, rather what it meant that I was about to get this close to Daisy. With any other woman, I wouldn’t have even considered this. It was too intimate. I didn’t care. All I knew was what I wanted.
I stepped back to her and slid a palm down her spine, savoring the arch as she flexed into my touch. I curled my hand around her hip, gripped my cock and slid into her creamy clench, sinking to the hilt at once. Her head fell forward on a low moan. Everything blurred, the feel of her sweet channel pulsing aroun
d me, the sound of her pants and moans, and the sensation roaring through me. All of it tightened until I felt her start to throb. I reached around and pressed against her clit, savoring the rough cry of my name. To be bare inside of her when she came was the most intense pleasure I’d ever experienced. My own release thundered through me. We stood under the pounding hot water with me curled over her.
After I managed to catch my breath, I regretfully drew out of her. I’d have died happy if I stayed right there buried deep inside of her. She straightened and slowly turned. I meant to say something, but I couldn’t seem to speak. She lifted her hand and traced a single fingertip along my collarbone and down my arm before bending over to pick up the soap.
Later that day, I kept remembering the trail of that single touch. Every time I recalled it—hundreds of times—my heart clenched.
Chapter 16
Daisy
The steady sound of my feet striking the treadmill soothed me. I ran in place for a solid hour before stepping off. It was raining today, so I’d headed to the gym rather than for a run in the park. I snagged my towel and water bottle and headed toward the showers. After a quick shower, I was almost dressed when I heard my name. I glanced up to see Zoe Lawson standing a few lockers away. She was in the midst of tying her shoes.
“Oh hey. I didn’t even see you there,” I said by way of greeting.
Zoe flashed a quick smile. “Me neither. Gyms are funny like that. I come in here so focused on minding my own business, I’m sure I miss seeing people all the time. How’s it going?”
Zoe was engaged to Ethan Walsh, Tristan’s former roommate and another British soccer player who’d signed with the Seattle Stars a few years ago. Zoe had become a friend over the last year. She was smart as a whip and beautiful with her rich auburn hair, hazel eyes and long legs. Along with many others, I’d been slightly amazed at how quickly Ethan had fallen for her. Ethan had once been a player for the ages. He’d never been an ass about it, but casual had been the name of his game. He’d met Zoe and never looked back. They were downright domestic now and had just purchased a lovely home in a residential area of Seattle.
