He said he had read her books, so he knew the thoughts that went through her mind. Did he think she just came up with those ideas because someone else might find them sexy and hot? Hell no. They were the fantasies that she dislodged from that dark side of her brain. The side that wanted passion and ecstasy – outside of the bedroom would be nice.
More than once, she’d figured this was all her fault. First of all, she hadn’t told him that she was a virgin, and when she’d seen the recognition on his face, she’d nearly cried. He didn’t cringe, he didn’t panic... no, something very possessive had flashed in his bright green eyes, and it had shot an arrow straight through her heart.
On top of that, Ashleigh had been hiding who she was as an author, worried it would make people think of her differently. She was beginning to think that was the case with Alex, only he was thinking that she didn’t want any of those things she wrote about. He couldn’t have been more wrong.
She should’ve known better. After that one night at the guest house, Ashleigh should have seen the signs then. He was treating her like she would break if he handled her too roughly. She might break some other things if he didn’t get that out of his head.
A decade ago, Ashleigh had seen the prelude to what they shared the other night in his bed, but Alex had apparently been scared that long ago night. She remembered the argument he’d had with her, the way he had cut her to the bone with his words. Words she was pretty sure he didn’t remember.
“Ashleigh, wait.” Alex’s deep voice reverberated through the room as he pulled away from her.
He was on top of her on the couch, her shirt was unbuttoned, her bra unhooked, and he had been doing wondrous things to her nipples with his skilled tongue. And she had innocently weaved her hand between them, wanting to touch him, wanting to make him crazy with need, the same way she was. And since he was on top of her, she wasn’t so sure why he was telling her to wait. He had all the power.
“What’s wrong?” She asked, staring up into the glowing emeralds in his eyes.
“How can you ask me that? Fuck.” He pushed himself up, a little unsteady, but he finally made it to his feet.
“Did I do something wrong?” She asked, fumbling to get her bra hooked and holding her shirt together, trying to cover herself.
“No. And that’s the problem. You’re doing everything right, but we can’t do this. We, Ashleigh. You and me.”
“Why not?” For the life of her, she didn’t understand, but she knew from the glare he was pinning her with that he was about to tell her.
“Because you’re too damn young for me. Too sweet. Too innocent. You can’t handle a man like me, Ash.” With that, he stormed across the room.
“And what makes you think that?” Fury ripped through her gut. What the hell made him think she couldn’t handle him? From the looks of it, she was doing a damn good job so far.
“I know you, Ash. You need someone to love you. Someone to make love to you. I’m not that man.”
“And what do you need?” She asked, figuring since he thought he’d pegged her it was only fair she understand where he was going with this.
He surprised her when he walked back toward her, roughly pulling her against him. The force of his movements had her stumbling into him.
“Baby, I need a woman who will go to her knees and let me bury my dick down her throat without needing meaningless words.”
A sharp bolt of lust burst from her core, radiating downward. Something about the graphic image he put in her head made her want to do just that. But apparently, according to Alex, she wasn’t that type of girl.
Not that she even knew what type of girl she was when it came to sex. She’d never been with a man before. Not like this.
“You’re not ready for that. And I’m not ready for you, Ash. No matter how bad I want to fuck you, it’d never be enough.”
Ashleigh pulled away from him then, shocked and hurt by his statement. She prayed it was the booze talking, but something told her that the truth was coming out. She wanted him to go, but he was too drunk to drive, so she did the only thing she knew to do.
“I’m taking you home. My brother can bring your truck to you tomorrow.”
“No.” He insisted, but stumbled as he tried to make it to the door.
Ashleigh grabbed her keys from the table; pocketing his while she was at it so he couldn’t get to them, before following behind him. It took a little manipulation, but she finally got him into the passenger seat of her car and gratefully he closed his eyes and passed out.
The memory still pissed her off and made her want to hit him. Apparently ten years didn’t change his mind because Alex was still treating her like fragile porcelain.
She needed to come up with a plan to change his perspective, to educate him a little more. She didn’t want to be the dominate one in the relationship, she wanted to be dominated. She wanted to relinquish control to this man.
The stories she wrote, and the stories that Sam and Sierra had told her were what she wanted. She only wondered how hard she would have to work to penetrate his thick skull.
~~*~~
“Alex?” The timid voice on the other end of the phone had Alex stopping abruptly. He had just walked out of Xavier’s office and was heading to his car, hoping he could stop by Ashleigh’s for a little while when his phone rang.
Stopping midstride, he asked, “Jessie? What’s the matter?” Alex wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer to that question.
“Can you come over? I think he’s –” The words were cut off and a gruff voice erupted in the background seconds before the call ended.
Alex took off at a run, dialing the number back and praying Jessie would answer the phone. When she didn’t, he focused on getting into his truck and getting out of the damn parking garage.
By the time he was on the highway, at least another fifteen minutes before he could make it to her house, Alex had a pretty good idea what the hell was going on. He tried dialing her phone again. This time someone answered, but it wasn’t Jessie.
“What the fuck do you want?” The angry words were slurred, but Alex heard them loud and clear.
“Where’s Jessie?” He asked, putting his foot to the floor.
“What the fuck do you care, McDermott?”
Fuck. The irrational voice was all too familiar, and Alex still couldn’t understand what the hell was wrong with Jessie that she would let the bastard keep coming back. “Jeff,” Alex tried for calm, “where is Jessie?”
“Hell if I know. The crazy bitch took off.”
Alex gunned the engine, gritting his teeth to keep from swearing. It would only piss Jeff off more and not being able to come between him and Jessie at the moment, Alex was at a loss.
“Did she leave?”
“Fuck if I know. Why don’t you come over and try to save the day like you always do, McDermott? You know that bitch just eats it up, you always coming to her rescue and all.” Jeff rambled.
Alex wanted to hang up, but at least with Jeff on the phone, he knew where the man was at. “Is she hurt?” He had to ask the question, although it would likely set Jeff off.
“What the fuck do you care?” Jeff repeated himself, obviously good and drunk which was when he usually went on the rampage and found himself over at Jessie’s despite the restraining order.
“Did you hurt her, Jeff?” Alex annunciated slowly, hoping the man would answer. Taking a hard left, Alex pulled into Jessie’s neighborhood.
Jeff still wasn’t answering him, but now that he could see Jessie’s house from his truck, he didn’t have to keep him on the line. Without saying a word, he disconnected the call before pulling into the driveway and throwing the truck in Park.
Jessie’s car was there, but he didn’t see her outside, so he went to the door, knowing he’d better gear up for a fight because if the past was any indication, it wasn’t going to be pretty.
“Jessie!” Alex called out to her when he walked in the open front door. He glanced
over at Jeff but didn’t speak to the man. He was sitting on the couch, acting like he owned the place.
That definitely wasn’t the case because Alex knew who owned the fucking house. He did.
“Where is she?” Alex stopped short, staring at the skinny bastard lounging on the couch. What the hell Jessie ever saw in the man, Alex would never know.
“Fuck, dude. Are you stupid? I told you on the phone I don’t know where she’s at.”
Alex wandered through the small two bedroom house, glancing in both bedrooms, the bathroom, but Jessie wasn’t there. He didn’t figure she was, but he had to try. Going through the kitchen, he walked out onto the back steps, glancing at the separate garage.
“Jessie.” He called out to the only other place for her to have possibly gone.
When he opened the door, he found her lying on the floor, curled into a ball, crying.
“Damn it, Jessie.” Alex said without heat as he went to her and cradled her in his arms. “What the hell did he do to you?”
She was bruised pretty badly, but some of them were already fading, so Alex knew they weren’t all from today. But her lip was split and bleeding, and there was a gash above her right eye. A red haze clouded his vision, long since forgotten memories rising up from the ashes, and for a fraction of a second, he considered going inside and kicking the living shit out of Jeff.
Instead, he inhaled slowly, the scent of gasoline and mildew filling his lungs. He could think of so many other places he’d rather be.
“Jessie, I need to get you up.” He needed to check for any other wounds, see if she needed to go to the hospital.
When he reached for her hand, he found her wrist contorted at an odd angle, and she was holding it close to her body. Son of a bitch. The bastard broke her fucking arm.
Pulling out his cell phone, Alex did the only thing he knew to do. He called 911 and gave them the address. He informed them to bring the police because Jeff was violating the restraining order against him. When Jessie started to grumble something, he ignored her.
Half an hour later, the ambulance was taking Jessie to Baylor of Dallas and Alex was talking to the officer on the scene. Jeff’s drunken ass had been hauled away after a little bit of a scuffle, which would hopefully keep him in protective custody for a little while.
As soon as Alex pulled off the street, heading to the hospital to take care of the paperwork for Jessie, he dialed Dylan’s phone number.
“Hey.” Dylan greeted. “Where are you?”
“Sorry, man. I was handling a personal matter when you called earlier. What’s up?”
“I wanted to see if you’d be up to meeting Jake tomorrow morning in the office.”
Alex had to think about who Jake was, but then he remembered Dylan was in the process of hiring a couple of sales people for the home security side of the business. “I’ll be in early, but then I have to head out around noon. Cole and I have to go talk to a guy in Austin. What time will he be there?”
“I’ll have him come in around eight if that works for you.” Dylan told him.
“Sounds good. See you at eight.”
“Hey, Alex. Is everything alright?” Dylan asked, obviously picking up on Alex’s frustration.
“It will be.” He said vaguely. “Look, I gotta go. I’ll see you in the morning.”
With that, Alex tossed the phone in the passenger seat and focused on getting to the hospital. This was fast becoming the worst part of his week.
Chapter Fourteen
*** ~~ *** ~~ *** ~~ ***
Ashleigh was sitting in a booth, in the far back corner of the small diner, across from Sam. She had suggested a different place than their normal steakhouse lunch, hoping a change of scenery might do her some good.
“Where’s Sierra?” Sam asked.
“I don’t know.” Ashleigh said looking up from her menu. “I thought you would know.”
Confusion backlit Sam’s celadon green eyes before she glanced at the door. “I talked to her this morning. She said she wasn’t feeling well, but that she would try to meet us. I guess when I didn’t hear from her, I thought that meant she’d be here.”
“Did she say what was wrong?” Ashleigh hadn’t talked to Sierra in a week or so. The woman was busy with her interior design business, and between that and juggling two men, apparently she didn’t have much free time to talk. Aside from their weekly lunch dates.
“No, she didn’t. But, you know, she hasn’t been feeling well for a while now.”
“Do you think...?” Ashleigh let the question die off. She didn’t want to stir up gossip, especially where her friend was concerned.
“Do I think what? Spill it, Ash.”
Leaning over so only Sam could hear, Ashleigh glanced at the door and then back at Sam. “Do you think she’s pregnant?”
“Oh my God!” Sam exclaimed sitting upright. “I hadn’t even thought about that.” A mischievous smirk split Sam’s pretty face and made her eyes dance with happiness. Who would’ve thought?
“I wondered about it the last time we met. She’s been eating a lot more lately, not that the woman obviously has to worry about that, but it’s not like her. And she’s talked about not feeling well in the mornings.”
“Holy crap. That makes perfect sense.”
“I wouldn’t say anything to anyone just yet though. We’ll have to talk to her first.”
“Of course.” Sam stated, glancing down at her menu and acting like nothing had happened. How did the woman do that?
Ashleigh stared at the words on the laminated sheet of paper in front of her and tried desperately to keep her mind on the menu. Instead, she wanted to ask Sam a question while the two of them were alone. Not that she wouldn’t have asked the same question if Sierra had been there, but she was sort of leery of sharing too much personal information with too many people.
When the waitress stopped by and took their order, refilling their water glasses before she left, Ashleigh conjured up the nerve.
“What’s it like being with Logan?” And wow, that did not come out the right way.
Sam looked at her with a cocked eyebrow as if trying to understand what she was getting at.
“Good grief. Not like that.” Ashleigh smiled. “If I’d been using my eloquent gene, I would’ve asked what it’s like to be in a relationship with a dominating man.”
Sam laughed. “I was beginning to wonder about you there for a minute. I mean last week you were asking about threesomes and this week about Logan.”
Ashleigh blushed. Last week she had been asking about threesomes.
Since her friends were obviously having way more sex than she was, she was trying to get a better understanding of what goes on in their unique relationships.
Sierra was in a permanent relationship with two men, and they all three shared one another while Sam was married to Logan and they had recently invited Tag Murphy as a third in their relationship. The ménage thing must have something going for it because her friends seemed incredibly happy. All the time.
“When you say dominating, I’m assuming you’re talking about in the bedroom.”
“Does it have to be in the bedroom?” Ashleigh said with a sigh of disgust.
“Um...”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that Alex –“ Realizing what she was about to reveal, Ashleigh closed her mouth tight.
“Holy shit.” Sam squealed. “You did it, didn’t you?”
Ashleigh knew her face was as red as the checkered squares in the ugly tablecloth on every table in the restaurant, but she couldn’t stop herself.
“Tell me.” Sam insisted, taking a sip of her water.
“Yes.” Ok, so there it was. She’d admitted to her friend that she’d done the deed. Now she just needed to get some perspective on how to fix it.
“And?”
“And what?” Ashleigh asked, confused.
“How was it?”
“Off the charts amazing.” That was the honest to God
truth. Every time was better than the last, their bodies were so in tune with one another, Ashleigh was convinced they’d each been created with the other in mind.
It wasn’t that the sex was lacking, it was the spontaneity. Ashleigh would never get enough of Alex, but she wondered if they’d eventually get bored with one another.
“So why do I get the impression there’s a but in there somewhere?”
“It’s just that...” Ashleigh didn’t know how to say it.
“What? Is it boring? Is Alex bad in bed?”
It was her turn to laugh. “Hell no. He’s amazing. It’s the bed part that I’ve got a problem with.”
“Is there something wrong with his bed?”
“No. Not necessarily.” There wasn’t anything wrong with the bed per se; it was the fact that it was the only place he seemed to want to be when they had sex.
“Ok, spit it out.” Sam said, sitting back in her chair and looking far too serious for the conversation they were having.
“I think he’s worried he’s going to break me when we have sex. At first, before the first time, he was the same Alex I’ve always dreamed about. Commanding, dominating, sexy as hell. And then bam! We have sex for the first time, and he’s treating me like I’m blown glass and one wrong move and I’ll break into a million pieces.”
“So that’s why you wanted to know what it’s like with Logan.” Sam put two and two together. “From the impressions I’ve always gotten from Alex, he’s pretty dominating himself. Is that not the case?”
“That’s what I thought too. That was part of my original attraction to him. I’m beginning to think I have some misconceptions on what it means to be controlled.”
“I’ve read your books; you’re certainly right on the money.” Sam smiled but then looked serious again. “Did you tell him you were a virgin before you slept with him?”
“Um, no. But I don’t think he had any problems figuring that out.”
“Ash, I think it’s safe to say he’s just scared. He’s the only man you’ve ever been with. And my guess, since he’s a member of the club, he’s got some pretty kinky fantasies. He’s just worried that you won’t be able to handle it.”
Seduction (Club Destiny) Page 10
