by Roman Shepp
âTrust you to be so callous about so much death,â Jane spat, pulling her knees into her chest and folding her arms around them.
âI’m just being pragmatic. One has to be in this situation. It’s no good thinking about how things were or how things should be, only how things are. Every American has to look into themselves and think about how they want to move into the future. We’ve just been sent back into the Old West, where everyone was out for themselves. The New America is going to be a strong America, forged by people who have been through hell. The ones who survive are the ones who are going to make this country great again. The ones who survive are the ones who do find purpose, who do find truth, who do find meaning.
âI know you two don’t have the highest opinion of me, but I’ve spent my life looking to the future of America, trying to see how it can be improved. I know it’s having a lot of birthing pains, but the way this has unfolded means that we’re given a clean slate to be whoever we want to be. Instead of seeing freedom as a burden we should see it as an opportunity. We can shape the future ourselves. Now we all have the power, everyone. There are no rich, no poor. We’re all just Americans, and the only ones who will get anywhere in life are the ones who seize their opportunities. Never has the phrase the Land of the Free and Home of the Brave ever been more apt. We are living in the true America, and only the truest Americans will take their place here.â
Jane turned her face away, wishing that he was wrong, but when Frank spoke with such passion and zeal it was difficult to ignore him. The old memories returned, of how she had been swept up in his charisma and wanted to be near him all the time. Why was it so easy to remember how good things were with Frank when there were so many bad things as well? Hearing him speak like that brought up all the old feelings, each of them like a punch in the gut.
âI’m going to do a perimeter check,â she said, pushing herself up to get away from the situation.
Into the darkness she wandered, keeping the faint glow of the soft fire in her sight so she didn’t get lost, although at that point she didn’t think getting lost would be the worst fate in the world. She didn’t wander too far from camp, just in case Frank tried anything with Rosa, but she was afraid. Afraid for herself. She could feel herself slipping back into her feelings for Frank. They had been such a big part of her for such a long time that she couldn’t fully rip them out from her heart. Yet, she wished they were gone.
Tony was the type of man she should have loved. The type of man her father would have approved of. However, Tony was dead. Her parents still were in the South, hopefully surviving, and the only chance of love she had was with Frank. She wanted to scream and shout and tear her mind apart, but she had to settle for punching a tree, her fist smashing against the tough bark. Pain lanced through her arm and tears spilled from her eyes, so annoyed at herself for sabotaging herself. Being with Frank was like an addiction. While away from him she had been able to push away her feelings but being around him again threatened to bring everything back. She wished that he had been left in that bunker instead of Tony.
âWhy were you so good, Tony? Why did you give up your life to save his?â
In the silence of the night, there was no answer.
Chapter Two
Dawn broke again to another sunny day, another glorious day, another day where the future beckoned. With every new morning came the opportunity for progress, for people to grasp their destiny and prepare for the great fate that Hugo was providing for them. Matthias stretched out his limbs and twisted his neck from side to side, feeling the satisfying crack. Instead of spending the night in his small cabin, he was lying beside Natasha. She had her back turned to him, with her arms spread around a pillow. Her dark hair splayed out over the sheets of the bed and his chest. Her lithe, naked body settled on the bed perfectly. Matthias let his eyes linger on her slender curves, on the smooth unblemished skin, and smiled in contentment.
Natasha’s body had been neglected for years by her idiot of a husband, who had apparently looked elsewhere to satisfy his carnal needs. That man’s loss was Matthias’s gain, for Natasha seemed to want to make up for the years of neglect. She threw herself into lovemaking with wild abandon, letting go of any inhibitions. Matthias felt the stirrings of arousal again just thinking about the previous night. If this was any indication of how the future was going to be, it was a very good sign. Natasha had been wasted in her previous life, but that was true of most people who had found their way to the community. The old world had offered nothing to them because they had been different and most of them had not realized what they were searching for until they found this place.
Natasha was but one of many people who had found a new home. Matthias was the same. He often thought of his life before this, how empty and barren it had been. The future was going to be glorious, filled with honor and prestige. Natasha was pressing him to make a move on Hugo, but Matthias was not that reckless. Hugo still had his part to play in all this. It was prudent for Matthias to wait until the right opportunity presented itself, then Hugo would find that his reign would end as abruptly as Arthur’s had. Still, that wouldn’t happen until they were in the city and had united the people in a common goal. Nobody would be able to deny them now or meet them with scorn.
The warnings Arthur and his kind had given had been ignored, and now America was paying the price. Matthias didn’t entirely blame them for not having the foresight to listen to Arthur, though. The old man did not have the right aura to bring new people to the cause. Hugo, though, that man was different. When they rode into the city all would bow before him, and Matthias would be there right by his side, learning from all his mistakes.
Natasha would be there too, and the boys. They all would be one family. Matthias was glad for her past. It was as though someone had prepared the perfect family for him. All he had to do in life was wait, and good things would come to him. She stirred, twisting her head, murmuring something unintelligible. Matthias placed a hand on her back, letting his fingers spread over her bare skin. The sheets were ruffled, caught in between their legs. At his touch, Natasha stirred, wearing a smile. She turned her body around, draping an arm over his broad chest, twining her fingers in the thick curls of dark hair. Pressing her mouth to him, she kissed him on the lips, then rested her head on his shoulder, kissing the skin there as well. Then she lay, comfortable, serene, every breath washing over his skin. It was utter contentment.
âLast night was amazing,â she said.
âEvery night is amazing with you,â Matthias said, kissing her on the head, caressing her arm. The two of them were like one body; it was impossible to see where one of them ended and the other began, such was their intimate connection. Natasha smiled again.
âI’m never going to get tired of hearing you say that.â
âI’m never going to get tired of saying it.â
âI have to admit that I’m still getting used to waking up with someone beside me. There were so many times in my life when I had to wake up alone, my arms spread out as far as they could, searching for another body, finding only empty air.â Matthias kissed her on the top of her head again. âYou don’t mind me talking about my past, do you?â
âOf course not. It is a part of your life. It has made you who you are today and brought you to me. How could I mind when you would not be here without it?â
âI know, it’s just…you know, me being married and all that.â
A sly smile tugged at Matthias’ mouth. âThat does not bother me. From all you have told me of this man I do not see him as a threat, so it does not bother me at all.â
âOh, hell no, there’s no way Frank could threaten you. I mean, you’re better than him in every way. You’re understanding, you’re kind, you actually listen to me when I talk. Can you believe that that’s such a big deal to me? I can’t remember how many times I was having a conversation with Frank and he’d just pretend to be listening, like the
re were so many more important things than me.â
âThere is nothing more important to me than you,â Matthias said, cupping her head in his hands and tilting it up so he could look deeply into her eyes. Natasha closed her eyes in contentment and nuzzled up to him, hugging him even more tightly.
âIn fact,â Matthias continued, âI would like to know more about this man and how he managed to capture your heart.â
âYou would?â Natasha asked, surprised. Matthias nodded, so Natasha shrugged and continued.
âWell, when we first met he was filled with energy and passion. He acted like we were meant to be, and I’ve always been attracted to men who knew what they wanted out of life. He had a lot of ambition, and I thought we could be a team. I wanted us to be a power couple, and for a few years we were. For a few years everything was going as we’d planned, then the kids came, and he started getting more distant. I don’t think they were the death knell for our marriage. There were some moments where I could see that he really loved them, but I think he always liked the idea of marriage more than the reality.â
âSuch a waste of a life. The glory is in the details, in the small moments that form a long narrative. Too many people always have been concerned with the big picture, but a big picture is only impressive because of the little details that make it up.â
âI couldn’t agree more.â
âI pity your husband. He looked elsewhere for something that must have only paled to what he had at home. He blinded himself to the happiness he had, and in the end, you were the one who suffered. You must have been so tormented, spending all that time waiting for him.â
âThat’s what got to me the most. I hated how my life revolved around him. I remember asking him once if I should get a job, but he told me I didn’t need to do that. He didn’t seem to understand that someone might actually want to work.â
âDid you not take any other lovers?â Matthias asked innocently. The thought of other men having enjoyed her body did not bother him. She was a beautiful, sensual woman and it only was right that she had shared pleasure with other lovers, as long as she was now only devoted to him.
âThere were a few dalliances, but they never became anything serious. I had the boys to think about after all. They became my priority, and for how much I began to hate Frank, I didn’t want that feeling to transfer over to them. He still was their father, and I wanted them to see him as their hero. I guess part of me wanted the marriage to work as well, hoping that one day he’d come to his senses and come rushing back to me, admitting his failures and promising to turn over a new leaf. I’m glad that didn’t happen, though. I only was deluding myself.â
Matthias continued stroking her arm. He glanced down, noticing how her gold wedding band caught the sun. She evidently had noticed it too, for she ran her finger around it and held it to the light.
âActually, I think I’ve made a decision. I think I’m ready to let this go,â she said, pulling the ring off. It took a bit of tugging, but quickly slipped off her slender finger. âWhen I put this ring on I thought it was the beginning of a perfect life. I thought I was entering paradise. How wrong I was,â she added dryly. âI want to give myself to, to the community, and say goodbye to my old life for good.â
âThis pleases me, and it will please Hugo as well,â Matthias said, taking her hand in his own.
The ring dropped to the floor, clattering. Matthias pressed his mouth to hers, wanting to drown in another long kiss. When they came up for air, Natasha pressed him about his plans for the future again. Matthias tried to hide his frustration, not wanting to talk about Hugo when his heart burned for her.
âHugo is the strongest man in the community and has proven himself worthy of leading. There is no need for me to press him as yet. I only would be doing myself harm and destabilizing things if I broke the pact we made. Hugo has only ever treated me with honor, and I shall do the same.â
âEven though you’re already planning to take over from him one day?â
âIf I didn’t, I wouldn’t be showing him honor. He wants to surround himself with ambitious, strong people. I simply am acting as he would. When he was by Arthur’s side, Hugo was planning, and he undoubtedly knows that I am waiting too, patiently.â
âAren’t you afraid that he’ll try stopping you?â
âNot yet. As I said, we have a plan. If either of us did anything to jeopardize it, it would be a grave error and neither of us would be worthy of leading these people. There will come a time when the two of us must confront each other, but it will not be for some time yet. There is still too much for us to accomplish together. Do not fret, we have a long life ahead of us and there will be plenty of time to have everything we want. I already had to wait many years to find this place, and even longer to find you. Until this reaches its culmination we must take joy in the details, in all the steps we take toward our future.â
âWhen we walk through the city the people there will bow to us. They will exalt Hugo, but we must make sure they see you as well. We must make sure they do not see him as anything more than what he is, a man, because if they start to see him as a god we will never get them to support us.â
In a flash of fury Matthias smacked Natasha across the face with the back of his hand. Her neck twisted, and strands of hair whipped around. Staring at him in shock, her hand rose to her face, her mouth hanging open. Matthias stared at her coldly.
âI have a great fondness for you, Natasha, but do not push me. Do not attempt to weave your tempting tongue around my mind. I know what my goal is. I know what my plan is. If this is not proceeding as quickly as you would like, then that is your issue. I have told you how things are going to proceed, and you should make your peace with that. Do not seek to push me. I am a master of my own destiny, and you should know your place. Do not make the same mistakes as your husband and neglect the small details. Take joy in each day, and things will unfold as they must.â
âI have suffered years of emotional abuse and neglect from Frank. Do you really think a slap means much to me?â Natasha said tersely, letting her hair hang around her face, making her look like a demon.
Matthias considered her for a moment. Blood rushed through his heart and his head. His hand stung from where he had hit her. When he looked into her eyes he saw glistening tears, but she did not cry. She did not plead for her life. She was strong, resolute, and met him with fire. Once again Matthias was sure that he had chosen the right woman and that she had been made for him. He grabbed her neck and pulled her into him, forcing her down onto the bed. At first, she began to fight back. Then she kissed him. The kisses turned to biting, and the two of them tumbled around in the bed clothes making sweet, angry, frantic love. Nails dug into flesh and scratched down. Grunting breaths burst out, and at the end of it they lay there, sweating, recovering from the mad fury of their angry passion.
Matthias pulled the sheets away and stepped off the bed. His foot tapped something. Bending down, he picked up the gold wedding ring and held it to his finger as he walked to the window of Natasha’s cabin. The sun streamed in, warming his powerful body. He held up the wedding ring. It had been the promise of something unbroken, but it only proved that nothing was permanent. Natasha was his woman now, and soon the country would be his too. Natasha showed good ambition, but she had to be careful that her reach did not exceed her grasp.
Matthias breathed in heavily. Sometimes a kingdom required a ruler, not a conqueror. He would let Hugo have the glory of the conquest, but in the aftermath, he would take his place as the ruler of the new world. Soon he, Matthias, would stand before them all and revel in the adoration they paid to him. Natasha would be beside him, and everything would be as it should be.
Chapter Three
âWhat do you think of the place?â Saeed said, looking around at all the people.
Tara was beside hi
m, in awe at the size of the community. Saeed was making sure she didn’t wander away as he tried to hide his fear. This was the place he had been told was harboring a power-hungry madman, and yet the reality was something entirely different. People seemed to be happy here. They were growing crops, enjoying the warmth of the sun, and spending time with each other. It was quite a contrast to everything that Saeed had witnessed in the city.
In this place people were not torn apart by desperation and sorrow. Rather, they were prospering. It was a very strange feeling for him. Belinda and Martha had painted quite a different picture. Saeed had imagined people arming themselves for war, getting ready to march on the city. Although what he saw was entirely different. So, he played his cards close to his chest for the time being, making his priority keeping Tara safe.
âIt’s big. It seems nice. It’s better than being in the bunker. I like being outside, and the bunker smelled,â Tara said.
âYes, it did,â Saeed agreed, thinking back to his friends. Alone now, with the little girl, he was forced to face his place in the world. Tony was somewhere out there, he hoped. The reality of any of the others surviving a conflict with that madman were slim, but Saeed had to hope they made it out. He couldn’t lose anyone else.
So far, they had been given the freedom to wander around and explore, which was not what Saeed had been used to. So far, he had been kidnapped, abused, and tied up. So, to be treated like a person was refreshing, yet also unnerving given what the women had told him. Saeed hadn’t seen them since they had arrived, and he had a sinking feeling that he wouldn’t be seeing them again.
âLet’s go,â he said, and helped Tara to her feet as they explored the community.
Saeed didn’t feel safe here, but he wanted more information to see if Martha and Belinda had been telling the truth. He didn’t know why they’d lie, but there was always the possibility that their minds had been twisted. Unfortunately, that was a common side effect in this world. Saeed walked over to the crops, where some people were tending to the vegetables. A young man with a shock of blonde hair wiped his forehead and greeted them, smiling warmly at Saeed.
