“Uh-huh. Suddenly I understand a lot of little things. That still doesn’t explain why nobody just told me all this. Maybe not when I first woke up, I would’ve been out of there awful damned quick, but you’ve had like over six months of me in and out. Christ, this time alone I’ve been here for a month or more.”
Bane was silent for a moment. “Rebecca hurt you very badly, I just told you that. Even Gisela with Kev backing her couldn’t mend the damage much beyond getting you back to safe ground, and there was no reason to think any other healer could do more. We weren’t sure if it would ever heal completely, and we were afraid we were going to have to tell you, well, sorry, Jess, you could’ve come run with the wolves except there’s too many psychic scars, you won’t ever be able to. I, at least, was quite sure you’d never heal.” He chuckled softly. “Which at first I saw as a good thing, but Kev talked me into putting up with you past the day I picked up your scent in my room, and at some point I started hoping you’d heal, instead. I didn’t realize at first just how guilty Kev felt about it, or how upset he was over the idea of you never healing completely. Actually, I’m not sure it completely hit me until I saw just how relieved he was when I told him you’d changed. So. We waited. I suppose we should’ve told you at the very least that there are wolves around, and I think I would’ve soon since you already knew about pretty much everything else. That’s what I meant about good intentions.”
“If you’d told me wolves existed, I would’ve figured it out for myself.”
“Oh?”
“Lots of hints. Dreams… stuff like that. I couldn’t possibly have not put the two together. I’m good at lying to myself sometimes, but I’m not that stupid.”
“Nobody thinks you’re stupid.”
“I suppose half of Haven was in on this. I’m not sure if I’m flattered everybody thought it was worth the effort or supremely pissed off at the whole bunch of you.”
“You do have a perfect right to be.”
Both fell quiet again.
“So,” Jess said. “I’m a werewolf. Wouldn’t that freak Shaine out something fierce. What don’t I know about being a werewolf?”
“A lot. That’s going to take some time to learn.”
“Major points.”
Bane shrugged. “Our first responsibility is to protect. There are things out there that feed on psychic energy, and even Kev can’t protect himself. Wolves can fight them, though, and we do, even though it means getting hurt sometimes. I can’t think of any incident of a wolf smelling a predator in range and not attacking it. That was how I met Flynn, in fact: he’d just come to Haven, had no clue, was out wandering around. He almost got munched, but I killed it and then scared him half to death by changing to human.” He grinned. “He smelled like a seer, he was in Haven, how was I to know he’d never seen a wolf before?”
That was a fun thought, especially since nothing ever seemed to surprise Flynn. “There can’t possibly be enough wolves to protect everybody. And you can’t be with everyone at once.”
“The coven-link protects. If they killed me, Kevin would be first, Cynthia second, and Deanna and Flynn for dessert. Mages and very strong gifted and witches tend to attract, and any coven with that kind of concentrated power will always have a wolf in it. Weaker covens might not, though, and solitaries aren’t taking an insane risk by staying solitary. You’re right, it wouldn’t be possible to protect everyone individually. Mostly we defend the area. Haven is collectively the territory of every wolf who lives here, and predators are intruders—there’s a whole lot more I’ll need to explain about territoriality. That keeps them too wary to venture in very often. Once in a while they get someone, but it’s very rare, and usually they have to be begging for it like Flynn was. Predators aren’t as common these days as they apparently used to be, either. I think I could live with it if they became extinct.”
“Then they wouldn’t need wolves anymore,” Jess pointed out, with a hint of mischief.
That made Bane laugh, and lean back against the wall. “There’s that. They’d never put up with all our quirks if they didn’t need us. Of course, we wouldn’t have so many if we could live like we’re meant to. There are a crazy number of us living in what for wolves is very close quarters, a territory of a few dozen square miles, whereas one pack of wild wolves can have a hundred square miles. Tame food is fine, but without wild food once in a while we get sick, so we have to be always careful about hunting—it helps that no one else can hunt around here and the witches and dryads keep things healthy and wildlife filters in from farther away to fill the gaps eventually, but still. Having to deal with so many other wolves can get extremely stressful. The price of keeping our friends safe is that we get forced into behavioural patterns that just aren’t natural for us. Some deal with it better than others. Mostly, we learn not to need a lot of sleep, and we spend days being civilized and go play at night. Some people are more understanding than others, too.”
That conversation continued for quite some time, Bane obligingly answering every question Jess could come up with, until Bane told him Kevin said supper was ready.
Mage and witch greeted Jess with undisguised relief that he was home, as the two wolves joined them at the table.
“Were you having fun for the last two weeks?” Kevin asked.
“I was gone that long? Shit, Shaine’s going to kill me, that means I’ve been here for over six weeks. Yes, actually, I did have fun. But I think I’ll stick with civilization for now.”
Bane chuckled, and handed Jess the plate of steak. “You were gone right through Beltaine and on into May. There’s a reason we let them halfway tame us. Hot showers and food you don’t have to catch and clean beds being important points.”
“So I discovered. I think maybe this is really home.”
“We’ve been trying to tell you that,” Kevin said.
“I didn’t say I’m staying here for good.”
“Oh, for… how much more proof that you belong here do you want?”
“The fact that I’m a werewolf and there are wolves in Haven does not mean I belong here.”
“Cool it, phoenix,” Bane growled.
Kevin heaved a sigh, and reached for the pitcher of fruit punch. “So what is it going to take?”
“I think maybe I’m going to go back to Shaine for a while. I always come back, you should know that by now. But I need to think, and he is my friend. I guess… there’s too many loose ends.”
“It’s your choice,” Cynthia said. “Your room’s always here waiting, but this isn’t a prison.”
“No. It’s just the only safe place I know, where anybody actually cares. I’ll go in a couple of days, once I feel a bit more grounded in reality.”
“Not until Gisela gets a chance at the mess you made of your ear,” Bane said. “She can fix it, healers get used to fixing ears for us. And not until we have the party to end all parties. We can’t have a party to celebrate your being fully wolf without you here, can we?”
Oh, good god, not another party! Didn’t they ever stop?
22
Gisela wondered how people had picnics without witches.
Cynthia, Naomi, and Nick, between them, were holding a shield over the picnic table to keep ants and bees from being drawn to the lavish selection of munchie-foods Kevin and Lori had made—everything from fresh fruit and vegetables through cold meat and devilled eggs to cookies and tarts. The witches had also talked a couple of barn swallows into hanging around to take care of any biting flies and the mosquitoes that would soon start to show up as the sun dipped lower; there were bats living in a bat house that could be coaxed into taking over after dark.
Okay, so bugs have their place, ‘specially the bees and ants because they’re helping with the yard, but having a picnic with them? That’d be annoying.
The sun was pleasantly warm without being too hot, and the ground was dry enough that they could all simply lounge on the grass. Not far away, the fountain they’d had to pay a plumber t
o fix played cheerfully, glittering in the sunlight; all the other improvements on the yard, she and Deanna and Liam and the three witches had done. Beds of plants with bright flowers and pleasant scents would continue to bloom in sequence right through until fall—Naomi, who grew houseplants and spices to sell, was especially good at that, except with the colours, obviously—and vivid little green hummingbirds flitted around them right along with the heavy bumblebees and graceful butterflies. The rock garden was well on the way to being repaired, though she couldn’t see that from here. It would take them years to do everything they’d thought of, but for the moment, they’d made a satisfying beginning.
“I would not, for anything, be a wolf,” Nick said idly; sprawled on his back with an arm over his eyes, Gisela thought he looked like a contented cat. “Off running around and introducing Jess to the other packs is not my idea of fun, when I can be right here.”
Sonja giggled, and fed him a green grape before eating one herself. “Lazy.”
“He has a point,” Flynn said. “Between lying in the sun with the elvenmage idea of a light snack and friends to whom you have nothing to prove, or running all over Haven and having to worry about who’s alpha and who’s got more status than whom and all the rest of that junk, I’ll take being right here any day.”
“We’d be in an awful lot of trouble without them,” Deanna pointed out, just a bit sleepily, leaning back against Cynthia’s raised knees while the witch braided and unbraided her dark hair just for the sake of playing with it.
“Nobody said anything about not appreciating them,” Naomi said, and gave Gwyn another bite of mock chicken. “Just being glad not to be them. I don’t understand how they can put up with it, either.”
“Within one pack, it isn’t so bad,” Sam said. Alfari sniffed at her plate, and helped herself to a slice of ham, dragging it off onto the grass. Sam just sighed indulgently, and glanced at the bowl of water that had been left in the shade of the table for Alfari and Gwyn, probably making sure it was still reasonably full. “It’s only with so many all in the same place that it gets crazy. Packs become groups of friends instead of family units, and family members are in different packs. All the really complicated stuff keeps them from fighting every time they come within scent range of each other.”
“We all know they have to do all that, and why,” Flynn said. “And unfortunately, no one has come up yet with a better alternative. If there are lots of elves and dryads and gifted humans together, there are going to be lots of wolves, too.”
“We certainly hope so,” Kevin muttered, as he got comfortable again near Lori with another plate of food for them both to nibble on.
“Spread the elves and dryads and gifted humans out enough to give the wolves lots of space, and what do you get? No Haven, no college, just a lot of hiding from the neighbours and isolation from others who can understand.”
“Without the college, finding a coven would be almost impossible,” Nick said. “You’d get small groups with minimal contact.” He’d come here to the college from Ravenrock in British Columbia on the west coast, Sonja had come from Falias in Newfoundland on the east coast, and Evaline and Liam were both native to Haven; Bryan and Lori were from Haven, but Naomi had come here from Endor. Gisela could definitely see his point. Sundark was the closest she could think of to a coven all from a single village, but Flynn had come from outside the villages, and Cynthia had lived here with family only since high school: her parents had an extraordinary chance at working in renewable energy research but taking their witch daughter to live in a Toronto suburb would have made her sick and miserable. Of course, her highly perceptive parents being in Scarborough worked out just as well for Flynn and his mother…
“We need the villages and the college,” Lori seconded. “Even the covens that live on their own in other places keep at least loosely in contact, and a lot of that is through the villages being the core of the whole network. It’d be nice if it weren’t so hard on the wolves…”
“But they’ve adapted,” Sam said. “That’s the whole point of all the elaborate rules about social status and behaviour. Most wolves have no trouble with that. Adult wolves spend the majority of their time with pack and coven, encounter each other mostly on neutral ground, have clear rules on how to handle those encounters, and everything is fine. No particular stress. It’s just the odd anomaly… ‘Fari, leave me some, would you?… the odd anomaly who can’t make that adjustment, and then you get all the stress and irrational antisocial behaviour and such.”
Gisela saw Kevin and Deanna both wince.
“I am still,” Nick said, “glad I’m not a wolf.”
“I suspect the wolves are glad they aren’t anything else,” Liam said quietly; he was sitting as still as only a dryad could, watching a small pale yellow butterfly that had landed on his arm. “I’ve heard Eva say things a few too many times along the lines of, I wish you could come run with us, it’s too bad you can’t. While we’re all lying here being glad we’re here instead of there, they’re probably feeling sorry for us for exactly the same reason.”
It was an interesting thought; Gisela considered it seriously.
“Point,” Lori conceded. “To us, it looks complicated and restrictive, but last time I said something about it to Bryan, he shrugged and said, That’s just how things are. Okay, so Bryan’s the world’s most easygoing wolf, but I’ve never heard him complain. And he has made comments like Eva’s.”
“Diversity is a wonderful thing,” Flynn laughed.
“Jess didn’t grow up with all this, though,” Sonja said. “Is he going to be okay with it?”
“Not right away, but give it some time. He’s learned to deal with everything else.”
“Besides,” Kevin said, “you obviously haven’t actually seen Jess come home from a run. He’s bouncier than Cait, and happier than I’ve ever seen him. That’ll help a lot. I wouldn’t worry about it. The others will make sure he learns what he needs to.”
“And hopefully they’ll finish up the grand procession eventually and remember that there’s still a party here,” Deanna said.
“Miss a party?” Nick laughed. “Not likely. They’ll be back. And by then, the dryads’ll be well-rested, the elves’ll be well-fed, and we’ll all be ready to party all night.”
“They won’t take a chance on missing out on the food, either,” Cynthia said. “Not if I know our wolves.”
The conversation meandered aimlessly, comfortably, and shortly before the sun vanished below the horizon, Flynn said, “Here they come.”
Those who were dozing—Gisela among them— roused themselves and stretched, and Kevin got up to check how much food was left.
“Watch it, they’re…” Flynn began.
Five large bodies poured in through the gate at high speed, eliciting various yelps and a lot of ducking as the wolves variously dodged around or jumped over obstacles, people included. Jess cleared Nick and Sonja easily, and skidded to a stop next to Gisela, panting, but with his ears forward and his tail waving.
“Don’t do that,” Lori scolded. Bryan just gave her a wolf grin and ran his tongue up her cheek in a sloppy kiss before collapsing beside her, sides heaving. Lori made a square of magesilk out of sunlight and wiped her face with it, then whapped Bryan with it before letting it dissolve. “Don’t do that either.”
“Who won?” Naomi asked.
The chocolate-furred heap next to Cynthia and Deanna changed. “Not sure,” Bane laughed breathlessly. “But I think it was Eva or Jess.”
Evaline changed, too. “Less mass to move,” she giggled. “By the time you guys get into motion, we’re long gone.”
“If the two of you hadn’t been zigzagging all over the place, Bryan and I would probably have run right over you.”
“I almost did,” Caitryn said, and paused to scoop another handful of water from the fountain.
Gisela laughed, and rubbed Jess behind his ears. “Good one, Jess.”
“That little brat there,”
Bryan said, “is going to lose that pretty black tail next time he gets it in my face like that.” He didn’t sound any more serious than the other wolves did.
“Only if I don’t bite it first,” Caitryn retorted.
“No biting the wolf-cub,” Evaline said sternly, and actually managed to hold the expression for a couple of seconds before starting to giggle again.
Gisela picked up sudden shyness from the wolf under her hand.
“Change,” she said softly. “It’s easier to talk and stuff.” She moved her hand, so it was only resting reassuringly on his shoulder.
Jess’ ears went halfway back, briefly, and he looked down, then he shifted to human. The shyness didn’t go away, though; he stayed near her, and quiet, though she could feel the joy singing inside him. She smiled, let her hand fall so she could close it around his and squeeze.
“Now that we’ve got the rest of the gang here and all in a useful shape,” Kevin said, “let’s get on with this party, shall we?”
23
Jess dropped the required change in a pay-phone, dialled a familiar number, and waited patiently for someone to answer.
Caitryn did. “Hello.”
“Hiya, Cait. It’s Jess.”
“Hi! How’s it going?”
“Could be better.” There was an understatement. “How ‘bout you?”
“Ah, things are pretty quiet ‘round here, you were here for so long last time that we got used to you. Besides, we’re all still recovering from that party.”
No kidding. “Is someone from Sundark around?”
“Why on Earth would you want to talk to Sundark? I’m much more fun. Go away, Kev, you can have it when I’m done talking to Jess.”
“Please? This is serious.”
“Oh, all right, if it’s something serious. You take care.” She moved the phone, and he heard her say in the background, “It’s Jess.”
Kevin took it from her. “Heya, Jess. What’s up?”
Black Wolf Page 20
