“I rather highly doubt it. He’s mad enough at me that he’s not likely to disrupt Dmitri’s training to bail me out.”
Bane didn’t bother to knock, simply pushed the door open.
“Kevin. I want to talk to you. Alone.”
Apprehensively, Kevin got up from the edge of the bed, and followed Bane downstairs to the vacant living room. Where were Flynn and Cynthia and Isleen? Bane settled himself on the couch; Kevin chose the floor, conscious of how sensitive wolves were to non-verbal communication and unwilling to take any chances on antagonizing.
“What are you planning on doing now?”
“Dia was trying to figure that out when you came in. Rebecca’s not really going to care what she does. Just what I do. And I have no idea.”
“Do you really think you can stand up to Rebecca alone?”
Wearily, Kevin shrugged. “No. Doesn’t look like there are any other options. I’ve managed to alienate pretty much everyone in Haven really quickly, no one will help me. She won’t kill me if she’s calmer. She was just madder than I’ve ever seen her, last night.”
“Half a dozen senior alphas are talking to her this morning and warning her that she’s going too far, and that she’s about to have most of the wolves in Haven come down on her for it. Non-interference has limits.”
“Well, that might slow her down for a while.”
“How long are you seriously likely to stay away from her?”
“I don’t know. She’s very good at saying things in ways that are extremely convincing and by this point, she knows an awful lot of my buttons that she can push to get reactions. And what am I going to do anyway? Wander around Haven with no coven until a predator notices the completely unprotected elvenmage and decides that it’s worth the risk? There’s no wolf in Haven other than her and Karl that’s going to want me around. At least Dia will be safe.”
“Deanna’s loyalty to you is common knowledge—it’s protected you from more consequences of your actions than you think. Do you really think she’ll stand back and let you go back to Rebecca?”
“I don’t know, probably not. I don’t know, I don’t have answers for any of this. What do you want, anyway? You helped us, the rest is our problem.”
“What I want,” Bane said calmly, “is to know just what’s left of you that’s really you, and if there’s enough of who you were before September to be worth trying to save. Frankly, I’m not sure either way, but don’t ask my coven-mates that question, you won’t like the answer.”
Kevin stared at him. “Why would you care?”
“I have my reasons. What’s left of you, Kevin Lioren?”
That conversation lasted a very long time. Despite his brusqueness, Bane wasn’t entirely unsympathetic, which made it easier to talk.
Words wound down into silence. Kevin waited, empty inside of all feeling, completely numb.
Bane slid off the couch to kneel in front of him, and cupped a hand under Kevin’s chin to raise his head so he could meet him eye to eye.
“You’ve managed to dig yourself into one hell of a hole, mage,” the wolf said gently. “And despite my better judgement, I don’t have the heart to leave you in it. If you promise me, no more bullying, you’ll try to get yourself all untangled, then I’ll do all I can to help you.”
Caught completely off-stride, Kevin whispered, “I promise.”
“Up until now has been the easy part,” Bane said. “Now comes the hard part.”
*
Oh, so true, Bane, Kevin thought. The hard part. And it’s never ended, in some ways. I’m such a hypocrite. I came down hard on Jess, but I’m the most like him. If Coven Sundark ever broke, would I go back to Becky? I’m not sure I’d have a choice. And I’m certainly in no position to say anything about irrational behaviour. I set new records. Gods, why they put up with me then I’ll never know, I don’t think they do either. He got up, wandering restlessly. It had taken so long to persuade Flynn and Cynthia to even be around him without Bane or Deanna or Lori present, though he’d been careful every instant not to do anything that could be threatening, and he’d failed spectacularly at that last a time or two. It had taken even longer to learn to think for himself again, and learn what was him and what was Rebecca’s manipulation. He’d tried so desperately to reassure everyone that he wasn’t what they thought he was and prove himself worth the faith Deanna and Bane and Lori placed in him. He and Deanna had healed, and Coven Sundark was born of the bonds woven in the doing.
Jess had been dragged, all-unknowing, into their war; he’d survived and in doing so made himself another target for Rebecca’s revenge. The one person who should best know, had walked neatly into Rebecca’s trap and closed it for her.
Gods, Jess, I’m so sorry, please please come home. Anyone can change, and I really believe you have, I was such an idiot… You’re my brother, you’re the little brother Mom never gave me, and you need a brother so bad…
A brother you can count on, anyway.
Wearily, Kevin turned away, and went back to his own room.
29
Sam settled herself comfortably on her bed, and propped a silver-framed mirror against the headboard facing her. For a moment she gazed into it, then closed her eyes, concentrated on slowing her breathing and centring herself.
Once she felt ready, she opened her eyes and focused on the mirror again.
“Show me Jess leaving Haven,” she murmured to it.
The mirror clouded; she kept her eyes on it without looking away, and gradually the mistiness cleared to show her Jess walking along the road south. She watched, her heart aching, as every step took him further away.
The image grew increasingly hazy as he neared the edge of the township, and finally blurred to such a degree that nothing could be seen.
She’d been afraid of that. To find even a wolf willing to be found, outside the borders of the township, would be some trick; to find an unwilling one would take a minor miracle.
That was no reason to give up. She’d never forgiven herself for losing him once; she couldn’t let it happen again while there was still anything she could possibly do.
She reached out to lay the fingertips of both hands against the ornate frame of the mirror, and whispered a name.
The mist shimmered in a rainbow of hues, then cleared to show her the image of a moon-white tiger with stripes of midnight shadows. It looked at her, yawned, and stretched.
“Help me,” she said quietly.
If I can, the tiger said, words forming in her mind with the clear silver purity of windchimes. What seek you, human sister?
“Jesse. I need to know where he is, what kind of danger he’s in, what I can do about it…”
Peace, be slower. The young one is difficult for me to find, as well. This, though, I will tell you: there are those on my plane who grow ever more certain that he is of Cassandra’s line, and there are those who seek ways to simply kill him so that the question becomes irrelevant. Those ones begin to involve those who summon them.
Sam shivered. “Then he’s in serious danger.”
He is. The tiger washed one forepaw meditatively, and resumed with a thoughtful note in its voice. And yet he is not. Demon-luck is powerful indeed, and his will to live is very strong. To kill him would not be at all an easy thing to do.
“There has to be something we can do!”
There is. Wait. This much I know: this tale has not yet ended, too much remains unresolved, and the universe dislikes unfinished business.
“Waiting won’t help him!” She heard her voice beginning to climb in volume, lowered it again.
The greatest danger to the young one is danger only he can fight, and that only when he is ready. Let the game play itself out. The time will come when you must act, but for the present, there is nothing you can do. Could I find him for you, I would tell you where he is, but what then? He would not hear anything you say. Be glad I cannot. If I could, then others could as well.
Sam shook her head s
tubbornly. “I can’t accept that. I can’t just sit back and hope Jesse decides to come home someday before the less pleasant residents of your plane kill him. There has to be something I can do.”
As you will. Call him by his true name for all the world to hear. Tell your friends and his the full truth. Then your wait will be over.
“I can’t do that either, and you know it.”
Of course you can. You must simply be prepared to accept the consequences.
“If you aren’t willing to help me, then I’ll ask others until I find someone who will.”
The tiger laughed, not ungently. You will not find any who is more your friend than I. You will get less help from some, and misdirection from others.
“I have to try! Maybe someone can at least give me something to go on. Anything is better than doing nothing.”
The tiger’s form blurred, shimmered fluidly into that of a white falcon with midnight markings. You are well matched with your soul-bird, human sister. I wish you all good luck in your quest. The image broke like a rock had been dropped in a mirror of water, and cleared to show only rainbow mist.
Alfari pushed the door open, and jumped up on the bed. She sniffed at the mirror, then curled herself into Sam’s lap, purring softly, watching the mirror intently.
Sam stroked the cat with one hand while she called upon other demon allies, and some less friendly ones she knew only by name. Some of them she thought were as restrained in their mockery as they were only because of Alfari’s presence and obvious loyalty; if nothing else, the moral support was worth a great deal, while demon after demon scorned her search or told her brusquely that no demon could or would help her.
Finally, exhausted, she gave up and leaned forward to turn the mirror face down on the bed, then picked it up again. Connection broken; it merely reflected her and Alfari. She got up, draped Alfari over one shoulder, and went out to the living room.
Bryan gave her a weary smile. “Any luck?”
“With what?”
“Looking for Jess. Don’t tell me you aren’t, I won’t believe you.”
“I didn’t find out much of anything that’s any use.”
“You and everyone else. Maybe he’ll change his mind and come back.”
Sam shook her head slowly. “Do you really think he will?”
“No, not really. Evaline and Caitryn are trying to track him, but I don’t think they’re going to get anything useful either. He headed south, he went back to the city, I’d bet a lot. We can’t find him there. Flynn’s willing to relocate indefinitely to search from there, and Kev’s willing to go with him in case that helps, but that’s dangerous and pointless. There’s much too much noise from too many other people for Flynn to get a fix, and he does know it, he just doesn’t want to admit it.”
“Nothing’s impossible,” Sam said softly, stroking Alfari absently. “Demon-luck’s pretty powerful.”
“His life takes him on enough of a roller coaster ride that I guess you could call it demon-luck, but I’d rather not place much faith in luck.”
“Neither would I.” Not even demon-luck.
30
Gisela had been lingering on the fringes of Deanna’s covens for as long as she could remember, a pattern broken only for the time Deanna had been with Rebecca.
Not since she’d first heard it proclaimed that Coven Sundark had been born had she seen anything more than the usual disagreements within any close-knit group.
Certainly nothing like what she was faced with now. Not wanting to be alone, she’d walked out to Sundark’s house to wait for them to finish their usual once-a-week circle.
Curled up on the couch beside the woodstove, soaking up its heat, she could hear the voices from the next room, loud and angry. She winced; it might give them a chance to release some of the tension, but doing it this way was only going to leave bad feelings behind. In a sense she could understand it: worry for Jess was gnawing at her, too, though she did her best to maintain the calm serenity a healer should show. She just wished they’d find a different outlet.
On second thought, being alone might not be so bad after all; she wasn’t sure she wanted to be here when this circle ended.
Wearily, she uncoiled herself and made her way back out of the house. Tomorrow she’d see what she could do about the chaos; no one was likely to be very receptive tonight.
She trudged home, not even the bright moon she normally loved walking under doing much to dispel her gloom. Her family was concerned, but she fled to her room and closed her door. She knelt by the window, petting the fluffy grey-brown tabby sprawled full-length on the sill. He raised his head, began the low thunder of a purr.
“You’ve got it lucky, furball,” she murmured. “You have people to pet you and feed you and spoil you, and you don’t have to worry about much of anything. The people who spoil you have all kinds of things we have to worry about.” She rubbed his pale gold belly, and he twisted over on his back so she could reach more easily.
“Jesse can’t be gone forever. We’re bound together, me and him and Kev. Something’ll happen, he’ll be back.”
*
The next day didn’t go precisely as she hoped.
What she wanted to do was talk to Sundark, and try to get everyone to see that attacking each other wasn’t going to undo the damage, while working together just might find Jess.
She walked to the village proper, letting the internal pull guide her towards Kevin—too bad they couldn’t use that same link to find Jess, but that would take more than a spider-silk thread.
She found him, and she also found Rebecca and Moira. The latter pair were leaning against Donovan ‘Sky-Drum’s store Arachne’s Loom; she didn’t think Kevin had noticed them yet, too tangled in his own depression.
“Dear me,” Moira said loudly, with blatantly false solicitude. “Poor Sundark. Should’ve been more careful about who they called a friend.”
Kevin whipped around, his melancholy melting into anger. “Damn you, Becky, you did this! You sent Avryl to vamp him! Why? I thought all that was finally over!”
Gisela saw a dark look flicker across Rebecca’s face, then she smiled charmingly. “You should never take me for granted, you should know that. Anyway, Avryl set up the trap, but you closed it. It was a transparent trap, and you walked right into it. I don’t know whether he can change, but apparently you can’t.”
Kevin whipped a ball of scarlet mage-fire at her; Moira deflected it. Gisela watched most of the people on the street turn wary, many of them edging away or leaving the vicinity outright. She knew Kevin would notice, too, despite his current focus, and that it would only feed the fire.
“Come on, Becky,” Kevin hissed. “You want a fight? Let’s have it out. You and me, right here, right now. Come on.”
“Why should I?”
“You a coward, wolf-bitch? You a dog under all that red fur, killing chickens by moonlight? How are the wild male wolves? Better than I was? Do you have to dominate them first?”
Rebecca bared her teeth in a savage snarl. “You little…”
“Stop it!” Bryan commanded, interposing himself, Deanna a step behind him. Gisela released the breath she’d been holding; they wouldn’t let Kevin fight. “A fight here would endanger too many innocent people. I thought you’d learned better by now, Kevin.”
“Leopards can’t change their spots. Why should I care if others get hurt?”
Deanna stepped in front of him, and met his gaze with hers; Gisela felt the fringes of it as Deanna mentally threw the full force of her anger at him. Much like a physical slap, it rocked him back a step, and brought tears to his eyes—of shock as much as pain, Gisela thought. “Damn you, mage, you’re doing this on purpose! Punishing yourself! Now grow up and get a grip on yourself or so help me…” She trailed off, tears on her cheeks. “Oh, hell. Let them go, Bryan. Maybe they’ll hurt each other badly enough to learn something.”
“Not here,” Bryan insisted. “You want to fight, you go elsewhere
. Alone.”
Rebecca regarded them all haughtily. “It’s not worth the energy. Come on, Moira.”
Rebecca and Moira left in one direction; Deanna strode furiously away in another.
“There’s only one way you’ll find Jesse,” Bryan said. “And that’s together.”
“There’ll be a fight right here if you don’t get out of my way,” Kevin said savagely. “Take care of your own coven and leave ours to us!”
“Jesse’s my friend too! There are a lot of people worried about him! Haven’t you realized yet just how many lives he’s become a part of? Coven Sundark does not have some exclusive claim on him! Sam’s frantic trying to find him!”
“Then I wish her best of luck and she can talk to him when she does!” The mage whirled away.
Gisela went after him, had to run to catch up. Kevin barely glanced at her. “What do you want?”
“A hug?”
He stopped, actually looked at her this time. After a pause, he offered both arms. She hugged him hard, resting her head against his chest, and tried to send him as much love and reassurance as she could.
“We’ll find him,” Kevin told her firmly. “When and how I don’t know, but we’ll find him.”
“Not this way we won’t. Sundark all together maybe could…”
He pulled away, the walls coming back up. “Teamwork is a bit hard when everyone is more intent on calling names.”
Black Wolf Page 25
