by Julie Benson
After a deep breath, she reached out to him, wanting to comfort him and reassure herself, but he tensed, and crossed his arms over his chest. Apprehension snaked down Grace’s spine.
“All three students possessed fake IDs they’d purchased from Langston Printing. With their statements I obtained search and arrest warrants. We arrived and arrested the Langstons without incident. They’re in jail right now.”
His matter-of-fact, flat tone, as if he were testifying to the night’s events in court, escalated her concerns. He’d broken up a government documents forgery operation. His pained look didn’t fit. Shouldn’t he be happy? Proud? Or, at the least relieved he’d shut down the business? Instead he appeared as if he’d experienced a major career disaster.
“Congratulations. Not a bad day’s work,” she said, hoping his odd reaction was due to exhaustion and post-adrenaline rush. “Are you sure you’re okay? There wasn’t a problem, was there?”
“I couldn’t have scripted it better, and with the evidence we seized from their house and the print shop the case is rock solid.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“We need to talk.”
She toyed with the ring on her index finger as her anxiety spiraled. Icy tendrils of dread twisted through her body, chilling her from the inside out. Guys never wanted to talk. In fact, they only did so under the most dire circumstances, or when backed into an inescapable corner. Whatever the subject, Grace knew she wouldn’t like it. “I’m listening.”
“I wasn’t honest with you when you caught me searching the bedroom. I didn’t tell you I was here on the FBI’s behalf.”
She grappled to process his words and their implication. On the FBI’s behalf? “Does that mean you were working with the FBI?”
He shook his head. “I never quit working for the Bureau. I was placed in the chief of police position after Jack died because of my connections to the town to find the source of the forged government documents.”
“You lied to me.”
He’d kept secrets. Bits and pieces of arguments between her parents tripped through her mind. What a fool she’d been to think he was different. Anger surged through her system, dark and heavy, eating away at her.
“Yes.”
Except for Cassie, she’d never trusted anyone like she had AJ. Actually, she trusted him more, having confided things in him she hadn’t shared with anyone. The fact made his betrayal worse.
“There were so many things about work my dad couldn’t or wouldn’t share with us. Mom resented that, and started keeping secrets. That was the big problem that destroyed their marriage. When you told me about the forgery case, and trusted me keep that confidence, I thought you were different.”
He refused to look at her, instead pinning his gaze on the wall. “It’s not that simple. I couldn’t tell you I was still working for the FBI.”
“Actually it is. You either trusted me, or you didn’t.”
He winced as if she’d slapped him. “I’m sorry you got hurt. You’re a great woman, and we had fun, but—”
She tuned out the rest of what he said because it didn’t matter. He was giving her the it’s-been-fun but-it’s-over-no-hard-feelings speech. She should’ve recognized the fact sooner considering how many times she’d been on the other side of the delivery.
The heart she’d allowed to thaw shriveled inside her, leaving her raw. She picked at the couch fabric. What should she do now? Wish him a happy life? Say it had been nice knowing him? She had to say something. Why hadn’t she paid more attention to what guys said when she gave them this speech?
Because she hadn’t wanted to hear. She hadn’t wanted to see their pain.
Her toes tightened. Inside the boots he’d given her.
Being on this side sucked.
“No worries. I was thinking the same thing.”
Don’t go. Or say we salvage a piece of what we had. Houston isn’t that far, is it? Tell me you’ll visit on weekends when work allows, and we’ll see where this goes.
She twisted the ring on her finger. How could she think that would work, or that either of them would be happy with it? All they’d be doing was bailing water off the Titanic with a tea cup.
“I’m sure we’ll see each other every once in a while when I’m at the Bar 7 for the annual reunion. We’ll have to grab a cup of coffee or a burger at The Horseshoe.”
She nodded, her face frozen in neutral expression mode. “Definitely. We’ll have to stay in touch.”
He’d always appeared to see through her defenses to what lay in her heart. Why couldn’t he do that now? How could he believe this was what she wanted? Her heart urged her to take back every word she’d said, to beg him to love her, but she couldn’t. She refused to give more than he was willing to. Her entire life she’d made allowances, lost chunks of her soul, and yes, her dreams, to maintain relationships with her family. She’d never believed she was worthy of expecting more. Until now, and she refused to settle for less than a man meeting her halfway. She wanted more. Demanded it.
“You look tired. You should get some sleep. You’ve got the bachelor party tonight.”
He nodded and stood. She rose as well, following him to the door. Refusing to give in to feminine hysterics, she would hold together until AJ left. Then she’d throw one giant hissy fit to get her emotions and him out of her system.
He opened the door and turned to face her. His aqua gaze searched her face as if trying to see into her soul. Not this time. She folded her hands in front of her to keep them from shaking. As if clamping them together would keep her from falling apart. Forcing her pain and embarrassment down, she met his gaze, strong and steady, keeping her features blank. Or at least she hoped.
Please don’t let him see how I’m barely holding on. How him leaving breaks the heart I swore I’d never let love anyone this much. How I thought we could have a future together. Build something real and lasting.
“Have fun at the bachelor party.” She nodded toward the open door. “Now you need to go because I have things to see to for tonight as well.”
After he walked out, she closed the door behind him. She concentrated on her breathing as she counted to thirty to make sure he was gone before she let the tears fall.
That night when AJ arrived at the Bar 7 for Ty’s bachelor party, a cooler of Shiner clutched in his hand, he was strung tighter than a brand new barbed wire fence, and about as prickly. Worse yet, he was in no mood to celebrate.
He kept telling himself he’d done the right thing ending his relationship with Grace. Maybe some day when his career wasn’t circling the bowl, he could contact her, but now she didn’t need dead weight bringing her down when she’d started getting her own life going.
But damn he would miss her something fierce.
AJ knocked on the door and waited for Ty to answer. Between his mood and the arrests, tonight would be fun.
“I ought to punch you for not telling me you were still with the FBI,” Ty said when he opened the door.
“I couldn’t, but if it helps, I feel lousy about it.”
“I guess that’s something.” Ty peered outside. “Where are Zane and Coop?”
“I drove here from town. I had a couple of things to wrap up. They should be here any time.”
“I can’t believe the Langstons were forging government documents. When their son said he was going to Princeton, we all wondered how Diane and Jeff were swinging it financially. I figured he’d gotten scholarships, but I guess they found another way. Damn shame.”
AJ followed Ty inside to the living room. “That’s why they needed the money.”
Not that having a good reason justified the crime, but somehow it made the situation worse. What parent didn’t want to give their child everything they could? But to resort to illegal activities? How could the Langstons think committing a crime was a better solution than telling their son they couldn’t afford Princeton?
“When are you leaving?”
AJ settled on th
e couch, reached into the cooler at his feet, and pulled out two bottles. He handed one to Ty seated in the recliner beside him. “Monday.”
“Damn. I liked having you around. With all the women in my family sometimes I feel like I’m swimming in Lake Estrogen. I hate to think what it’s going to be like when Ella’s hormones kick in.”
AJ shuddered, remembering those days with his sisters. “Yup, there’ll be some scary days, but you can visit me anytime.”
“It’s not the same as being able to ride over to your place any time, and sit on the porch shooting the breeze while drinking beer.”
“You’re tough. You’ll survive. Plus, you’ve got Cassie. A man couldn’t ask for a better woman.”
Except for her best friend.
A band of guilt tightened around his chest as the memory of how his betrayal had dimmed her gaze when he told her he was leaving, flashed in front of him. The devastation on her face, her disappointment in him, haunted him and would for a long time.
“What about Grace?”
“What about her? There’s nothing to say.” He refused to talk about him and Grace. Couldn’t. The wound hadn’t closed enough yet. He’d finally found the right woman, but everything else couldn’t be more wrong.
He still didn’t know how he’d gotten the words out. How he’d told her it had been fun, but whatever they’d had was over. What a lie. All he’d wanted to do was beg her not to give up on him, to stick with him until he rebuilt his life, but how could he when that might never happen? But he couldn’t. Not when right now he had nothing to offer her.
He’d failed both Grace and his father.
“You’re one stupid shit.”
AJ flinched, but absorbed the blow of Ty throwing his own words back in his face. Ones he’d said when Ty had been ready to let Cassie walk out of his life. “This is different than you and Cassie.”
“Only in the land of denial.” Ty sipped his beer, then stared him down as only a best friend could. “Jobs come and go, but a good woman? Those are harder to find, but it’s your life, and if you want to screw it up, that’s your choice.”
In the kitchen at The Two Sisters’ Inn, Grace selected a Malbec from the bottles lining the counter. “Two Sisters’ Inn is beautiful, but it makes me feel like I’ve stepped back in time. That and I worry I’ll break something.”
Glancing around the kitchen at all the antique glassware and other bric-a-brac covering every surface, she realized she preferred The Bluebonnet Inn’s eclectic, more minimalistic homey feel.
Grace opened the wine, and filled Cassie’s glass. “I’m sorry about tonight. This is the lamest bachelorette party of all time.”
Of course, the fact that Grace was serving as the designated driver could be influencing her opinion. Wine would definitely improve her attitude concerning this party.
Cassie swirled the wine in her glass. “I haven’t told anyone this, but it’s been hard making friends with women my age in town. That’s another reason why I’m glad you’re here. Apparently a lot of them had their sights set on Ty. My getting involved with him hasn’t made me Miss Popular.”
“If I wasn’t so strapped financially, Aubrey, you and I could’ve gone to Vegas. Now that would’ve been a great bachelorette party.”
Cassie titled her head and stared at Grace. “I’m not disappointed. Why are you?”
“I should’ve done better than this. You deserve it. You’re more than my best friend.” She realized God hadn’t given her the best family, but He’d made up for part of the mistake by giving her Cassie. “I’d say you were family, but the way mine has supported me the last few months, that isn’t a great compliment.”
“I know what you mean.” Her friend clasped her hand, tears in her eyes, making Grace’s eyes mist over as well. “You and I are family because we choose to be. That means so much more.”
“And now you have Ty and his family. I’m glad you’ve found someone to share your life with. Someone who makes you happy.”
I’m glad what you have is real, and not an illusion.
A haunted look passed across Cassie’s features, and her hands tightened around her wine glass. “Chloe said Ty was perfect for me. I wish she were here giving me a big fat I told you so.”
“Me, too. She may not be here physically, but she is here.” Grace picked up a delicate crystal wine glass off the counter and poured herself a tiny bit of red wine. “Here’s to Chloe. While you’ll always be missed, you’ll never be forgotten.”
“Thank you for that.” Cassie tapped her glass against Grace’s. The gentle, high-pitched ping of fine crystal echoed around them, as they sipped their wine. “I’m worried about you, though. Why haven’t you returned my calls? Did you find my note that I left when I stopped by the inn?”
Grace nodded, and insisted she wouldn’t cry. That was why she’d avoided Cassie. If they talked, if she opened up about AJ, if she loosened the tight grip on her emotions, she feared she’d start crying and never stop.
Shoving her emotions into a dark corner, she refused to spoil this lame bachelorette party further by falling apart. Especially over a man. “I appreciate your concern, but I haven’t wanted to talk about it.” She couldn’t bring herself to say his name out loud. “I’m fine. After all, we hadn’t known each other long. Sure I thought we might have possibilities, but who gets serious about a guy that quick?”
She was such a liar because that was exactly what she’d done. She’d thought she had a future with AJ. What a fool. How could she think she knew him in a tiny blip of time? Falling in love with AJ was almost as bad as believing in love at first sight.
“Sometimes we meet people, and we know they’re meant to be a part of our lives,” Cassie said. “That’s the way it was with us. Remember?”
Grace nodded, and smiled, remembering how she’d met Cassie, lost on campus, staring blindly at a map. Turned out the building Cassie was looking for was next door to where she was headed, and they’d set off walking. By the time they arrived they’d been friends, and when Grace’s roommate from Hell dropped out, she contacted Cassie who moved in. Such a simple meeting, and now she couldn’t imagine her life without this friend as her anchor.
She’d had the same feeling that AJ was meant to be part of her life a few days after meeting him.
“Sometimes our radar is off,” Grace scoffed.
Good outcomes never result when a woman breaks her number one and two relationship rules. One, never date a cop, and two, never get serious about a man.
“I’ve never felt this way when I’ve broken up with a man before.” Especially one she hadn’t slept with. Thank goodness that hadn’t happened.
Yup, breaking rule number two was turning out to be a killer.
“I’m sorry.”
“I know.” Grace downed the last bit of wine in her glass, and placed it in the sink. “And that’s the end of this discussion. I’m done with the pity party. Tonight we’re celebrating how blissfully happy you’re going to be with Ty. I won’t let this bring me down tonight and it won’t dampen your wedding tomorrow. I will be fine.”
Because she refused to accept otherwise.
Focusing on Cassie, on sharing this special day with her, held Grace together the day of the wedding. As she helped her best friend do her hair, makeup, and dress for the wedding, Grace concentrated on making memories. Now as she watched Ty’s sister, Aubrey, walk down the aisle, past the small group of friends and family gathered at the Bar 7 for the ceremony, her knees knocked together. Pachelbel’s Canon in D swelled around her, battering her frayed nerves.
She could do this. The walk down the aisle, and the wedding photos would be the hardest part of the day. Yippee, group photos with her and AJ to permanently commemorate her foolishness. As if she’d forget this mistake. But then she’d be fine. She’d never have to see him again.
Get coffee or a burger? Not likely. In fact, she might start an annual retreat of her own. A be-anywhere-but-in-Wishing-when-AJ’s-reunion-rolls-aroun
d reunion.
The further Aubrey progressed toward the men waiting in front of the gazebo, the more Grace’s stomach roiled in protest. Focusing on calming her breathing to prevent hyperventilation, she refused to look at AJ.
That was the key, avoiding looking at him no matter what. It was too dangerous. Like looking directly at an eclipse without one of those box devices.
Zane’s grandmother, a slip of a woman, with an iron will and a personality similar to her grandson’s, nodded at Grace. One step at a time. That was how she would do this. Forcing herself to smile, she moved forward.
Don’t look at him.
But as if drawn by an unseen force, she felt compelled to search out AJ’s face.
Dressed in a dark suit, white shirt, what Grace had been informed was an Aggie maroon bow tie, and black cowboy boots, he presented an impressive display of western manhood. But today, his shoulders appeared rounded, his stance not quite as confident. Her vision blurred, and her heart rate slowed. Her hands clutched around her bouquet of yellow roses keeping them from shaking. She raised her chin, determination to prevent anyone, especially AJ, from seeing how much his betrayal affected her, coursed through her. When his gaze locked with hers, she tossed him a look-all-you-want-because-I’m-fine stare.
A minute later she’d traversed the long aisle, past all the beaming, happy faces to arrive safely at the gazebo. A major win in her book. Her anxiety eased as she turned to watch Cassie walk down the aisle.
Her best friend appeared radiant in a strapless satin A-line dress with an empire bodice that suited her with its simplicity. Her left hand held a bouquet of yellow and orange roses. Her right clasped her niece Ella’s smaller hand. Huge, radiant smiles on their faces, they strolled toward Ty, who stood tall and proud waiting for them.
The love shining in Cassie’s resplendent face brought joyful tears to Grace’s eyes. Her friend finally had the family she wanted. The belonging. A man who’d already stood by her side during the rough storms life sent Cassie’s way, and would be the father Ella needed. But it was more than that. Cassie and Ella now had an extended family who loved and accepted them unconditionally as if they’d always been part of the family.
