"Now you know why I'm looking for a good sexual stimulate or sex vitamin, because I got a slew of horny girlfriends who need my sex every day. Every workday, I have sex with three to five different broads in the same day and usually, I have more than one sex session with each of them. I can't help it, because I'm addicted to pussy! It always makes me super horny to rip their clothes off to get to that wet musky beaver hiding just beneath their panties. I always need to rip their clothes off, 'cause there's something real arousing about ripping their clothes off that always turns me on like nothing else can. I need to hurt my girls and ripping their clothes off is the best way to begin. Last night when you called Jason, I answered the phone out of breath 'cause I was having animalistic anal sex with my wife and I could barely hear you, because she was yelling like a stuck pig! Without me knowing it, my wife slipped a Viagra pill into my nightly vitamins and Holy Shit Does That Stuff Work Great! My wife can barely walk today! I took that Viagra pill and fifteen minutes later while reading the newspaper, I looked down and to my amazement, I saw that Mr. Smith was ready to go to Beaverville! And since Mr. Smith was so strong and chubby, I just had to give my horny wife some animalistic anal sex and I tore into her pink asshole like a wild savage beast! I know that you wouldn't think it of me by looking at me, but I'm a sex God who's worshipped by so many girls, because its like what you said Vince, the girls love me because I'm a Goddamn Sexual Tyrannosaurus, Ha, Ha, Ha! Jason, is it all right if The Sexual Tyrannosaurus has mobile home sex with Audra in your mobile home today at lunch time, because I'm going to pop a Viagra pill so The Sexual Tyrannosaurus can fuck her like a big dinosaur?"
"Yeah, I guess so," Jason then begs like a sexual deviate, "if I swing by early and if I don't cum in her, do I have your permission to fuck Audra's foul-smelling pussy?"
"Not on your life, that pussy is only for me because I own it and you are not to touch one pubic hair on it! Her wet pussy and horny asshole are off-limits to you Jason!"
"All I'm asking for," Jason begs, "is for you to throw a little pussy my way since you have more than you need, you're being a big greedy hog about this? What's the big fucken deal, all I want is just a little piece of pussy or a tight asshole will do nicely? Or, while you fuck Audra's smelly little pussy, will you allow me to suck on her tits? If I can't have her pussy, can I at least fuck her tight asshole for only two minutes?"
"No! Audra's husband is not even allowed to fuck her asshole and I'm the only one who fucks her asshole and it'll stay that way, so no fucking of her ass is permitted!"
Sudden anger overpowers every other emotion and Chris and Jason storm out of my office to head down the hallway in opposite directions slamming doors behind them. By witnessing this as well as a number of other events during my initial three weeks at the dealership, has convinced me that these horny Rednecks are Goddamn Crazy!
And to prove this notion true, be on red alert when you turn the page because in the next chapter, Brother Barry And The Transvestite Incident will come to you live!
My philosophy that will help mankind to rule over women is this: Hot women are like a fine bottle of wine that is hard to find and even harder to get your hands on it, but when I get that bottle of wine, I sample it slow and long, I relish in the taste of its sweet flavor and I slowly savor its full body and aroma. I fully enjoy it for as long as I can, but when I am done with that fine bottle of wine — I Throw It Away And Get Me Another!
The Sexual Tyrannosaurus, Christopher Cramer (264-59-6073)
II
Brother Barry And The Transvestite Incident
WITHIN a short period of time from accepting my sales position at the dealership, the regional manager who goes by the Redneck name of Brother Brent Wainwright becomes the new co-owner of the dealership who is now partners with Wayne Frier, Matt Frier and Todd Frier and with Brother Brent Wainwright's increased desire for profitability, after many crime-ridden decades of pillage, plunder and outright theft by Wayne Frier and sons who committed felonious crimes against the swindled public for over thirty years, the Wayne Frier name attached to the dealership casts a very negative connotation and to solve this public relation problem, Brother Brent steals the solution from my Business Plan and changes the dealership name and the new name becomes The Family Home Center of Homosassa. The manager who is also known as The Sexual Tyrannosaurus, Chris Cramer, is eventually "fired" on May 11, 2001, not for stealing forty-two thousand dollars ($42,000.00) of deposits from the customers over a two year period, but for being blackballed by the banks because he was caught too many times creating fraudulent loan documents to close on a mortgage, which includes creating a fictitious employer for someone who is not employed only to see the bank repossess the mobile home three to six months later. However, these crimes are not isolated to Chris Cramer alone, because the bran-new co-owner, Brother Brent Wainwright, is a master at it as well as all other salesmen who were taught or are in the process of being taught by Brother Brent, who, was originally taught by Wayne Frier himself. In time, I learn that all salesmen except for myself, are producing fraudulent documents for mortgage approvals and 99.9% of every mortgage closed, is closed with fraudulent documents and this includes all FHA mortgages as well. Mortgage fraud also leads to document manipulation with which is used to rob the customer's down payment which includes all trade-in assets whether they be cars, boats, campers, jewelry, mobile homes, spare tire, horse, land, oral sex or anything else of value is always stolen without the customer receiving any credit at all. And there are a multitude of ways to accomplish the theft of all trade- in assets and if you stare for three days directly at the correct location on your loan documents, you will not even recognize the robbery of your own assets. Through many methods, scams and techniques that are continually enhanced to become pure perfection and if crime can be an art, than Wayne Frier and Brother Brent paint the Mona Lisa with the close of every fraudulent mortgage. To give the reader a quick idea of the many overlapping methods that are involved, I'll just name a few and it always begins with The Stretch Out Principle; multiple Form 500 Contracts in one transaction that display fictitious numbers; The Cash Conversion Smoke Show; falsified appraisals; The Floor Plan Bank Scam; The Bumped-Up Construction Bill Package; The Go Away Happy Check; the title company is owned by the dealership; The Hush Hush Money Principle; Front-End Load Scheme; Increase The Sales Tax; use a bumped-up appraisal to max out the loan; The IndyMac Interest Rate Scam; show up at the closing with two different sets of loan documents and if caught using the phony set of loan documents, then open your attaché case to produce the correct set of loan documents and act as if your secretary made a mistake and the schemes go on and on. The manipulation of all loan documents is a standard practice by the salesmen because all salesmen are not only responsible for the sale of each home, but for the mortgage approval of the customer as well as the furnishing of all fraudulent loan documents to the bank for the closing of each mortgage as well as to oversee the purchasing of the land by the customer as well as to oversee the construction process of each mobile home as well as all other problems that arise and with every deal, a great many problems always arise. In my case, two to three weeks prior to the closing of a deal, Brother Brent assumes full control over my deal and customer and unbeknownst to me at this early time, the maxing out of the customer takes place and the change of all numbers in the deal occurs and all numbers are bumped-up to the extreme amount, which also means that the robbery of all trade-in assets as well as the stealage of all available loan money above the customer's original selling price is always implemented; to explain further, if the original selling price for the mobile home package is One Hundred Thousand Dollars ($100,000.00) and the bank issues a maximum mortgage loan amount of One Hundred And Twenty Thousand Dollars ($120,000.00) because the customer has good credit and or income, through scheme, scam, misrepresentation, concealment, intimidation and the application of installing fear into the customer, Wayne Frier and Brother Brent will always steal that extra Twenty Thousand
Dollars ($20,000.00), of which is above and beyond the original selling price and this maxing out of the poor customer occurs without the customer's knowledge, because this is always hidden on the backside of the HUD-1 Settlement Statement known as the "Summary of Seller's Transaction" and this backside is never disclosed to the customer nor was it made available to me, until I acquire it by secretly shelling out fifty dollars to Brent's secretary, Lorraine Waldeck, for each copy. To give you a quick idea of the amount of money that is hidden and stolen on the backside of the closing statement, my customers Thomas Korman has $17,250.00 hidden and stolen on the backside; Kevin Hamlin and Jillian Rafuse has $9,919.93 hidden and stolen on the backside; Douglas Parke has $1,863.00 hidden and stolen on the backside; Richard Buggle has $4,200.00 hidden and stolen on the backside; Daniel Ware has a $16,500.00 fraudulent second mortgage plus his $6,000.00 pickup truck that he used as a mandatory requirement of his employment was stolen by the mortgage broker which equals a total theft of $22,500.00. All trade-in assets become free cars, boats and trucks to the dealership owners and sometimes, to the mortgage brokers who go by the names of Big Larry "the Fucken Bank" Kelner and his cocky partner in crime who is none other than Gerald Bertsch from Associated Mortgage Services, Inc. The second corporation that is also used when Big Larry "the Fucken Bank" Kelner steals two times in one transaction is Manufactured Housing Finance Corp. The close of Daniel Ware's new home purchase occurs at a time when I am no longer employed at the dealership and in regards to Daniel Ware's pickup truck being stolen by the mortgage broker, in his own words Daniel Ware reveals on February 25, 2002, the grim facts in this true and extremely shocking crime story:
"Since the very beginning, my main goal was to provide adequate housing for my family as quick as possible, because me and my girlfriend have six small children and we were tried of living in a very small apartment. During the construction and mortgage approval process, everything went real smooth because you Vince, was still working at the dealership during that time and our mortgage was approved with a low 7% interest rate and at that time, I was very satisfied with the construction of my new home and I was happy with the whole transaction in general. But after you quit working at the dealership in the early part of November 2001, the mortgage broker Larry Kelner as well as the owner of the dealership Brother Brent Wainwright took over all aspects of the purchase of my new home and that's when it all became a big nightmare, every goddamn day became a living Hell on Earth! From this point onward, Brother Brent and the mortgage broker Big Larry Kelner started to take full advantage of me and I did not like it, but I had no choice other than to follow through on the transaction and to close on it as soon as possible, because the dealership stretched us out for more than six extra months and the lease on our apartment had expired six months earlier and we were so desperate to move into our new home, that I had to take any rip-off deal that Brother Brent and Larry Kelner pressured me into, 'cause I was so very desperate and afraid of not getting the house. Even the girl at the Title Company said to me, that there are a great number of things in this deal that looks and smells bad, because these things are illegal to do, because its illegal for the mortgage broker to make money from two separate sources on one transaction, she said to me. By my own calculations, I calculated that together the dealership and the mortgage brokers stole the whopping sum of $24,204.56, in which $18,204.56 are in cash proceeds and my pickup truck worth $6,000.00 was also stolen by the mortgage brokers Larry Kelner and Jerry Bertsch, who, repeatedly yelled at me that they need my truck to cover their very high costs and expenses, as mortgage brokers what expenses can they possibly have, because they have no expenses and was paid $3,520.00 in points for putting the mortgage together? Then after the closing, it was about ten days after the closing on my home and without any notification, the mortgage broker Jerry Bertsch appears at my new home and yells at the top of his voice at me, 'Give me your Goddamn Work Truck, Because Points Aren't Enough! We didn't make enough money on you, so give me the keys and title to your work truck I said Goddamn You! Or we'll have no choice but to tell the bank to call in your mortgage note making it payable in full, So Don't Fuck With Us! Points Aren't Enough, So You Need To Hand Over Your Goddamn Truck because your fucken truck is needed to increase our mediocre profits, since we did not make enough on you!' Jerry kept yelling so violently at me for the keys to my truck and I was deathly afraid of them taking back my house and I was so nervous and scared stiff, that I handed over my keys as well as the title to my free and clear truck and then, that big thief Jerry Bertsch drove away with my truck. On the next day, I carefully reviewed my mortgage documents and my six thousand dollar truck is not documented anywhere on the loan documents in which includes the closing statement and that means, I never received any credit or discount for my truck, because its not listed anywhere as a down payment or anything else, which means that Jerry Bertsch and Larry Kelner stole my truck flat-out! I need my truck for my construction job, what am I going to do now, how can I provide for my family without a truck that is needed to do my job, how can I pay the mortgage every month without a truck and since the mortgage brokers and Brent left me penniless, I have no money to buy another truck? Jerry Bertsch threatened me so badly, he scared the livin' shit out of me and I stupidly allowed the stealing of my own truck and — I Got Fucken Robbed! Oh, I forgot to tell you, that about three weeks before we closed on my new home, Big Larry Kelner would telephone me every day to threaten me with: 'If Vince shows up at your closing to help you by giving you advice or if you ever speak to him ever again whether its on the telephone or in person, then in either case you can kiss your fucken new house good-bye, because I'll kill your mortgage and you and your white trash family can go live in a fucken cardboard box in the middle of the fucken street! Which means, do not talk to Vince again under any circumstances, do you understand? have I made myself clear? do you fucken understand me? Because when Big Larry 'the Fucken Bank' speaks, you better damn well listen! Do not speak to Vince again, is my final warning to you, unless you want me to kill your deal? Big Larry Kelner is the Fucken Bank and the Fucken Bank is always right and even if I'm wrong, I'm still right because the Fucken Bank is always right! Understand? So your only concern should always be to please the bank and Big Larry 'the Fucken Bank' Kelner is the Fucken Bank! The only thing that matters is not what anyone else says, because its what I say that matters a whole lot cause I'm the Fucken Bank! I hope I made myself perfectly clear to you, are my words understood? Because — the Fucken Bank Has Spoken! You better obey me, cause I'll destroy your little pitiful life if you ever again disobey me, because nobody screws with Big Larry and lives to talk about it! Know this, Big Larry is your God because Big Larry is — the Fucken Bank!' After you quit working at the dealership Vince, my low 7% interest rate skyrocketed to 10.876%, is this a way for Big Larry to steal more money from me, how can an interest rate jump that high without it being a heist?"
Like a no-good thievin' rat, with an open title Gerald Bertsch drives the stolen truck to PJ's Auto World and to conceal his crimes by hiding behind a paper champion, of which is a principle that is often used and widely known as The Paper Champion Principle, PJ's Auto World becomes the buyer to then become the seller by flipping the title to Gerald Bertsch as the buyer. Gerald Bertsch then sells Daniel Ware's stolen truck to Clearwater Towing Service, Inc. for pure profit, since the big stolen truck had not cost him a single dime. Boys and girls can you say — Crime Does Pay?
Within several weeks of Brother Brent assuming the very high salary position of co-owner of the dealership, he recruits a perverted psychopath from his church since they both have the same love and passions of wearing women's undergarments to then have transvestite sex with another drag queen, which I need not tell you, that the amount of uncontrolled sexual perversion that is performed on an hourly basis inside the dealership, is enough to bunch your silk panties into a knot. Once upon a time, the story begins, Brother Brent hires the perverted Brother Barry G. Branson, who is an
ugly gray-haired pot-holed faced lowlife who appears to be in his mid 50's who stands over six feet tall, who has a fat hideous wife who never showers and has oily hair, even though Brother Barry has plenty of experience in this business, but since he has the brains of a single cell amoeba, Brother Brent entrusts his complete training in the ways of mortgage fraud as well as how to manufacture all documents for mortgage approvals as well as what to say to the banks and what not to say, with another salesman who was also recently hired who goes by the sniveling name of Paul D. Maltese, who truly knows all the ins and outs of the business because Paul is a veteran salesman who has been in the mobile home business for over a decade, he claims. Paul is the type of an individual who will steal the shirt off your back and if caught, he'll proudly admit to the theft of your shirt with a big goofy grin. Paul is also the world's best brown-noser and like a washwoman, he loves to chitchat with nonstop gossip as well as to create arguments and fights with his provoking gossip while he stands safely on the sidelines watching the fight unfold with a big sadistic grin. While Paul spends two solid months in the training of Brother Barry Branson, when one day Paul skips with a spring in his step and a smile on his face to excitedly enter my office to proudly announce Top Secret news that just came off the press:
"Vince, get off the fucken phone because you have to hear this news, because this is important, so stop working and get off the phone, because you have to hear this directly from Brother Barry. I'll go get the Sick Bastard and while I'm gone, you stay off the telephone and wait sixty seconds until I get back! Hold on for one fucken minute and I'll be right back in a fast fucken flash!"
In a hectic frenzy and while pulling him by his lanky arm, Paul drags Brother Barry into my office and after shutting the door for some privacy, Paul begins to persuade Brother Barry into explaining why his church requires a pre-approved membership to enter it and Paul inquires with, "Please tell Vince why your church is closed to the public? Don't be shy, because its okay to tell Vince about your crazy church."
Crime Does Pay Page 2
