"Julius, before you get carried away with yourself, you should remember what happened to the real Julius Caesar, a bunch of senators stabbed him twenty-three times in the debating chamber of the Senate and during his final moments of life, he pulled his cloak over his head so the senators could not see him die. So be careful Julius, because if Brother Brent finds out about your sexual escapades, he may stab you twenty-three times as well. How can you have sex in the lobby of a dealership when at a moment's notice, a customer can walk right through the front door?"
"Its a very slow dealership Vince; and besides, when I tell my girlfriend Sandra that Mr. Sweet Dick Willy wants pussy, Mr. Sweet Dick Willy gets pussy right then and there without any hesitation and if a car pulls in the parking lot, we grab our cloths and run like the devil into my office to get dressed as fast as possible, but that rarely happens so Mr. Sweet Dick Willy always gets pussy whenever Mr. Sweet Dick Willy wants it. I make Sandra beg for sex like a lonely nurse with a horny asshole, 'Can Mr. Sweet Dick Willy come out and play with me, because my poor aching asshole is lonely and she's throbbing for the love of Mr. Sweet Dick Willy? I need some Sweet Dick in my ass, I mean that I really need Mr. Sweet Dick Willy because he's my little limp friend who I turn into a mighty monster! My horny asshole is craving for your thrusting love log to pound my asshole bloody,' she normally says to me to get the ball rolling. But on other occasions, she strips down naked and pins her large pussy lips wide apart so I can see the wet squiggly hymen and that gets me so horny, that Mr. Sweet Dick Willy needs to rape every pink hole that Sandra has and she has three of them, Ha, Ha, Ha! Lately, we pick out one furnished model home and we've been having awesome sex in the model homes, which is great because we lock the door from the inside and no one can enter and during most afternoons, Sandra lays down on a couch or table and spreads her legs apart and then with her fingers, she spreads her cunt lips apart so I can stare at the insides of her wet pussy for up to three hours without a single word being said because if Sandra speaks, it will wreck my concentration and then we will have to begin from the beginning again. Because I really love to stare at pussy for a long time. When we do doggie style, Sandra loves to bark like a toy poodle getting raped by a large Saint Bernard! By the time that we leave the model home, its four to five hours later and Mr. Sweet Dick Willy is by that time, exhausted. After we eat a big snack, its time to go home to put Mr. Sweet Dick Willy to bed for some necessary rest so he can grow big and strong tomorrow; and that's about the extent of my day. So far I had sex on every piece of furniture in twelve model homes and for eight days, I've been cuming on the furniture to leave the white stains of sex behind, so we can revisit the furniture to recall my triumphs. And the large circular wet spots from Sandra's soggy pussy is always left behind for others to sit in it to enjoy her strong fishy stench on their wet clothing, Ha, Ha, Ha!"
With a lazy yawn while stretching both arms toward the ceiling, Paul proceeds with:
"As the newly appointed manager of Ironwood, the first thing that I did, was to hire my girlfriend Sandra to be my sexy secretary so we can get a weekly salary for having kinky anal sex, dildo sex and cucumber sex all day long! And I always keep her payroll check for myself, this way I make a very big income every week while I satisfy my sexual perversion by having kinky sex with my sex slave girlfriend in the model homes and it makes me feel like, a Roman Emperor who has sex with his many Oriental slaves and concubines! Everyday I have the life of Riley; everyday I have anal sex on the sofa in the lobby; everyday I have sex in my large office as well as on my large desk as well as on the fax machine too! But mostly, I love to have sex on the couch in the lobby of the dealership and I call it — Sex on the Couch in the Lobby! On the rare occasion, when I step out of my office to see customers sitting on the couch in the lobby exactly where I just ate pussy an hour earlier, I break out with so much laughter, that I have to return to my office because its too funny! And then, I begin to think about how very beautiful Sandra's vulva, vagina, pussy, cunt, beaver and pink lippy gash is, and that makes me so horny and then I'm ready for more sex and sodomy with the prettiest pink pussy and most dazzling asshole in the world! And I'm not kidding of how beautiful Sandra's pink pussy and asshole is, because the hottest girlfriends that you ever had Vince and I know that you had many hotties, but none of them have a shaved snatch and pink anus as beautiful as Sandra's beautiful bald beaver and pink wrinkled asshole! It means Vin, every one of your hot girlfriends never had an award winning pussy and a trophy winning asshole that is as scrumptious as Sandra's delicious pussy and hot yummy asshole, it means that Sandra's pretty pussy is a more prettier pussy as well as a more wet gooey asshole than any other snatch or asshole that you have ever had, fingered or seen, because you have never had a sopping wet vagina that is as waterlogged as Sandra's sopping wet vagina and her fishy snatch will make you hungry for pussy while her bright gleaming asshole glistens in the night with sex appeal, because Sandra's erotic pussy and arousing asshole is the most seducing pussy and asshole that has ever been made! Sandra's asshole sparkles so bright, that its like the 4th of July in her ass! If you ever saw her wrinkly asshole, you would be guilty of committing many acts of sodomy all night long because you would not be able to stop fucking it, 'cause her gooey asshole is a beautiful thing of beauty! One day real soon, I will cast her pink pussy and asshole in bronze and I'll hang it on my wall to stare at it until my dying day. Like Julius Caesar, I have sex on and under my desk and on two occasions, Sandra hid under my desk and during the company meeting that I was giving, Sandra gave me two blow jobs and she enjoyed the tasty treat of swallowing my big salty loads of cum and nobody in the room knew it!"
"Julius, thank you for updating me on your sexual adventures, but I need to get back to work." Is my subtle hint for Paul to leave, but he only continues with:
"Wait One Goddamn Minute! Because I haven't told you about the best part yet! And since you're like me to think that these funny stories are funny, just wait until you hear this funny story. When we have mobile home sex in the model homes, we always bring grapes with us so I can be fed like the big great conqueror Julius Caesar! The soft romantic lighting is different in the model homes, so we play a sexual scoring game to see which model home has the best romantic lighting that properly illuminates her spread-eagled pussy that accentuates the lippy wet ripples, dimples, wrinkles, cracks and crevices of her fish fragrant pussy and tasty asshole that I always love to lick clean! Since I always love to stare at my hot sexy girlfriend's beautiful pink vulva with extra large joker lips that are so large that they flap in the breeze like a large bat, it means her pussy was assembled perfectly without any errors or ugly mistakes, which especially gives her perfect pink pussy a perfect shape, the way it curves around towards her hairy asshole is sexy; the way that her pink lippy gash curves backwards to meet her cum craving asshole is a thing of beauty; the arousing way that her wet cunt curves, that arousing curve of her four inch gash drives me wild because its perfectly designed so perfectly for maximum arousal and then, Mr. Sweet Dick Willy needs to fuck it real bad! If you saw the curve of Sandra's lippy gash, you would need to fuck it too! You're laughing, but I'm dead serious! And because there are so many arousing things going on inside her clammy cunt that arouses me until I go insane and need to fuck it, but before I fuck the living crap out of it, I am so fascinated by her pussy that I can stare at it for many hours without getting tired or bored; and at the end of my staring, I score the pussy's appearance from one model home to the next to see in which model home does her wet pussy get the highest score, is the question that I must answer? After the scoring is done, I love to lap up the liquids gushing from her soggy snatch."
"Who won? which model home won the contest of having the best romantic lighting that accentuates the pink ripples, dimples, cracks and crevices?" Paul's answer is:
"We're not finished with all of the model homes yet. But I can tell you this, there are two model homes in a tie for first place and if a first place winner ca
nnot be picked, then we'll have to start the contest from the beginning again. You know what else? I'm looking forward to having shit dripping anal sex on the pool table when that lazy Redneck who is none other than Brother Brent, gets around to putting that pool table in one of the model homes. And I'm not the only one having sex in those model homes, because Brother Brent's twenty year old brother-in-law Blair Bigelow (530-25-4303) has sex and sodomy in the model homes all the time with little underage girls every week, because Blair is addicted to having sex with juvenile girls who are from ten to fifteen years of age. And if you ask Blair about it, he'll even laughingly brag of having illicit sex with underage girls, because his fetish is to have sex with girls who are so young, that they haven't had the necessary time to grow the pubic hair on the pussy, because they are far too young to sprout hair on the bald beaver. Your dealership, is too uptight because that nosy transvestite Brother Brent is here and that's a huge reason why I love The Ironwood Bordello, because there is no adult supervision at Ironwood."
"While having hot sweaty sex with Sandra's shit dripping asshole in the model homes, it really turns Mr. Sweet Dick Willy on when she talks dirty by saying, 'After cucumber sex, would you like to have your salad plain or with oil and vinegar? During anal sex, like a dog eat the shit that drips from my asshole! Suck on my big hard two inch clitoris You Homosexual Motherfucker! Eat my pussy grandpa style! Inhale my feminine fumes and tell me that you love it You Insane Motherfucker! Eat me grandpa!'"
Paul D. Maltese, Manager of The Ironwood Bordello
While still laughing with a big perverted smirk plastered across his face, Paul stands and exits from my office as well as from the dealership and as I look out from my side window, Paul turns to look back at me while his tongue protrudes to whip back and forth as if giving oral sex to an imaginary vagina as he walks backwards across the parking lot to then wave good-bye as Paul enters his car to then mosey down the highway to make his return to his favorite whorehouse — to The Ironwood Bordello! When, it only takes a mere five days for Paul to make the next visit to my office with a much larger grin on his blushing face than the prior week and "What could be so exciting at Ironwood to give Paul such a gargantuan grin?" is my first thought as Paul plops his ass into a cozy chair opposite my desk without uttering a single word. With the door closed and in stifling silence, Paul begins to rapidly wink his left eye as if his winking gesture will telepathically enlighten me of the reason for his visit and jovial attitude, but it does not give me any clue whatsoever. After a long minute of his constant winking, I ask, "Did you win the lottery, what's the reason for your jubilant attitude?" All excited like a little kid at Toys R Us, Paul smiles and speaks:
"Since my sexy girlfriend has nicknamed me as The Sexual Hound Dog, I am very proud to tell you Vince, that the events that are currently unfolding are events that I have entitled as — The Sexual Hound Dog Meets The Stripper! The events of this exciting story began to unfold four weeks ago and they are speeding to a speedy climax in the next 24 hours. The events of this exciting story, all began because I'm fed up with that whore of a mortgage broker who is Mary Wagner from Advantage Investors Mortgage, because ever since I became the new manager of The Ironwood Dealership, all of a fucken sudden Mary Wagner begins to call me nonstop to sweet talk me into giving her and to her mortgage company all of my customer deals that she didn't get, but I do not want to give them to her because that corrupt Bitch sucks at closing deals! So I am not so keen on giving her more deals than I already gave to her, but that greedy whore Mary Wagner will not stop calling to try her best to sweet talk me for all of my deals and this goes on for four weeks of nonstop calling every day! Even when the feminine fumes of Sandra's big stinky cunt makes me cough with the dry-heaves from the strong fishy odor, the phone rings and silly me makes the mistake of answering the phone and its that persistent cunt Mary Wagner trying to sweet talk me into giving her all of my customer deals and with her gabbing, I lose my horny desire to eat wet stinky pussy because Sandra's wet stinky pussy went from a hot and wet pussy to a cold and dry pussy and the money whore Mary Wagner, wrecked my sexual mojo that day and I was never able to shoot my load of cum into Sandra's cum craving cunt until the next day, only cause I ignored all phone calls regardless of how many times that the phone rang and I was then able, to eat a triple portion of pussy all day long that day. When all of a sudden, after I told Mary Wagner that she will not receive another damn deal until the deals that I already gave to her are closed and at that time, I'll decide if she is worthy of receiving additional deals and since she did not like my rude answer, later that day an ex-stripper who was a very naughty topless and bottomless stripper who is now a worker in Mary Wagner's office whose hot body is trim without any body fat and with her huge titty implants, her huge knockers stick out like watermelons and even though she knows absolutely nothing about the mortgage business, it doesn't matter because her scantily clad outfits along with the art of flirting, is all that is needed to get mortgage deals thrown at her by many other dealerships and Mary Wagner said, that this hot stripper wants very badly to add my dealership to her long roster of horny clients and the stripper will do any sexual thing that I want her to do and she'll be as kinky as my imagination can imagine and I'm the greatest at imagining acts of perversion that will sexually abuse her blonde beaver and tasty asshole, it means that the stripper is willing to obey my every word and for my deals, the stripper said, she's willing to have kinky anal sex with a fat gerbil in any model home of my choosing any time that I decide to ram a big gerbil up her tight puckered asshole! So being on the skeptical side, the next day at lunchtime I drove down to Mary Wagner's workplace to secretly spy on them to see if the stripper has a hot sexy body and if her body is worthy of me fucking it and within two point two seconds of looking at the stripper, I fell in love with her big perky tits, wet bushy beaver and tight little ass that has hot sexy legs below it and in my car, like a Peeping Tom who is a virgin, I shot my big load of cum in my bikini briefs because Mr. Sweet Dick Willy needs to fuck that hot sexy stripper like a convict on work furlough! I plan to rape her tight little asshole like a prisoner with a conjugal visit! She's better looking than my hot sexy girlfriend Sandra and Mr. Sweet Dick Willy needs to fuck that stripper in all three holes and she will not leave my model home until her asshole is raped by my cucumber, dildo and fat little love log! If that slut wants my deals, then I need to fuck her like a drunk stripper at a bachelor party! After spying on her during the afternoon on that orgasmic day, I decided that even at the point of gunpoint, I must fuck that stripper in every horny hole that she has or I'll never be able to live with myself if I fail in my mission to screw her brains out, so I must succeed or die trying! From what I can see through the windshield, that stripper has the most beautiful pussy ever, because under that blonde bush are giant joker lips! Even if her cunt is contagious with infectious diseases, I don't give a rat's ass because I plan to eat, fuck, lick and swallow every yummy drop of hot pussy juice that her horny pussy spits out! Because I don't care about infectious diseases, because my long wet tongue plans to make himself totally at home inside her spread-eagled cunt slurping up every drop of her fish flavored pussy juices, so I'm not going to stop my eating of pussy by worrying about diseases that more than likely, she has! If I let the worries of catching a disease to hinder me, Mr. Sweet Dick Willy will never forgive poor me for not abusing her wet horny cunt and pink puckered asshole. After returning to my dealership on the following morning from my successful spy mission where I had gathered valuable intelligence that the hot and sexy stripper is a breathtaking blonde knockout who is not a chick from Florida, since this hot chick has a full set of big white teeth and she showers regularly and that means, that she is not a dirtbag from Florida. It also appears that the stripper uses a big heap of feminine deodorant sprays and douches so her fishy pussy can always smell as fresh as a heavily scented hillside of daffodils and marigolds. So after the big orgasmic day of spying, the following day I called up Mary W
agner and I made a special deal with her, I agreed to give her all of my customer deals if she forces that stripper to have cucumber, dildo and bloody anal love with me on any day and time of my choosing and the pimp Mary Wagner, agreed to all of my sexual conditions. So, at noon time tomorrow Mary Wagner is going to bring that big-breasted stripper to this dealership to have a private meeting with me in my old office across the hall and with all drapes drawn, I plan to fuck that stripper in her intimate holes and only after my orgasmic conquering of the wet pussy, mouth and asshole, will I escort the stripper to Ironwood to give her all of my remaining deals. I gave my girlfriend the day off tomorrow with pay so she will not learn of this sexual encounter because noon time tomorrow — The Sexual Hound Dog Meets The Horny Stripper! The pimp Mary Wagner already agreed to bow out of the meeting early on to have a meeting with Brent instead, so I'll be left alone with the stripper to make my moves and then, my sexual fantasies will be fulfilled! Right at the beginning of the meeting, I decided that I'm going to Order the hot stripper to whip out her huge tits so I can examine them to determine if they are fake implants or real titties and that will get the ball rolling for me, because she's already half naked, horny and hot for me! Don't ya think that this plan will work wonders for me? I'm going to tell that pole dancing floozy, to kick her lace panties off so she can do a topless and bottomless lap dance on me and during my erotic lap dance, Mr. Sweet Dick Willy will make his appearance and before she knows it, I'll be fucking that hot stripper and when I cum in her cum craving asshole, she'll bark like a dog! That's my denuding plan of attack to get her naked and then, fucked with my fat little love log. Doesn't that sound like a plan that cannot fail? Because Failure Is Not An Option! During my erotic and very arousing lap dances, I'm going to tell the naked stripper to spread her pink pussy lips wide apart like a budding flower and Mr. Sweet Dick Willy will give her a pearl necklace on her big hard nipples! After Mr. Sweet Dick Willy thoroughly rapes at least two of the three horny holes that she has, only after sloppy seconds in her pussy and ass will the hot stripper become my personal mortgage broker for all of my customers. I'll even take all of my customer deals back from Big Larry 'the Fucken Bank' Kelner and I'll give those deals to that big-titted stripper for some topless and bottomless lap dances that need to be followed up by what I call — The Horizontal Dance Without Pants! Because Mr. Sweet Dick Willy must be fully satisfied every day or the deal is no more and I'll take back my deals! So its either put out, or get out You Big-Titted Tease! The sexual hound dog will lap up all of her leaking liquids like a thirsty dog lapping up water from a bowl with hair around it. So Mr. Vincent, do you think that I should wear a three-piece leisure suit with a vest and bow tie tomorrow, or should the big sexual hound dog dress casual like only a sexy hound dog can do? By noon tomorrow Vince, you'll see for yourself how the sexual hound dog always razzle-dazzles the sexy bitches who dribble in their panties for the love of me, because I'm a heartthrob lady-killer who kills the ladies with orgasms!"
Crime Does Pay Page 14
