by Maci Dillon
Was it the tequila tricking my senses, or was it my night with Will?
Wednesday and I found a table in the shade and sat down. I tapped out a message to Raven and explained where I was.
I called her before I ran into Tex and begged her to come into the city to meet me. I wasn’t feeling up to dwelling at home in self-pity, so I figured we might as well enjoy a day out.
Tex returned, pulled up a chair beside me, his back to the tree. Wednesday moved to settle at his feet.
“Before we don’t talk about anything, Tequila Girl, there is something I need to confess.”
Never a comforting way to start a conversation. “Okay, shoot.”
“Last night... I need to apologize if I came on strong. The thing is—”
“Please, Tex. Stop. It was a spot of harmless flirting, nothing more.”
His entire body relaxed before me. I removed my sunglasses and squinted at him.
“Oh my God, were you worried I’d want to take this somewhere after running into you today?” My voice rose in pitch as I finished the sentence, both horrified the idea rattled him so much and embarrassed he’d picked up this vibe from me.
Sean was quick to jump in and assure me, “No, Chloe. I didn’t want to give you the wrong impression, is all. You’re a gorgeous woman and strange as it is for me, I enjoy your company. I would love to stay in contact with you, but friendship is all I have to offer.”
“Again, with the assumption I want something from you,” I scoffed.
“Fuck me, I’m making a mess out of this, aren’t I? Should have shut my mouth and appreciated the company.”
Laughter rumbled out of me, and I covered my mouth with my hand to mask it.
“Funny, am I?”
I pinched my fingers together and separated them marginally. “A little bit, yes.”
Sean chuckled. “I don’t do relationships at all. I am severely allergic to commitment, and I’m not afraid to say it. In fact, I prefer to advertise it. You, on the other hand, despite what you may or may not be looking for right now, you deserve so much more than I have to offer.”
“Awe,” I cooed at him in jest. “I’m flattered.”
Our drinks arrived, and I welcomed the break from this conversation.
The waiter also brought with him a takeaway cup of water for Wednesday.
Freaking adorable.
Watching the puppy lap at the water from a coffee cup at the feet of her athletic daddy as they dined out together was proper food for the soul.
It’s the small things. I needed to keep smiling today, and Tex brought it.
“Now I have a grasp on your deepest, darkest confession, Tex…” I rolled my eyes at the drama of it all, “… I should set you up with my bestie, Raven.”
Sean choked down his green breakfast smoothie, shaking his head furiously. “Abso-fuckin-lutely not. I don’t fuck friends or their friends. I don’t like ties of any kind and...”
My curiosity piqued.
“And what?”
“I have specific types of women I allow into my bedroom.” Tex flipped his hand to emphasize there was more he couldn’t or wouldn’t say.
I shrugged. “Meaning you’re a kinky motherfucker and like your pleasure served up in a particular fashion?”
“Christ. Scream it from the rooftop, why don’t you?”
“On the contrary, why didn’t you? I’m not oh so vanilla over here.”
He raised his eyebrows in question.
“Is that so?” Tex smirked, mixing his smoothie with the metal stirrer provided.
I waved him off. “Boring. We aren’t talking about me. Raven, however…”
Sean immediately tried to cut me off. “It’s not a kink thing—”
I hushed him forcefully with my hand in mid-air.
“As I was saying, Raven is a kinky ass bitch, too, and I never imagined I’d meet somebody else who was as opposed to commitment as her.” I leaned into the table and flaunted my palms upward. “Who knows, she might be your perfect match.”
I winked, and he stared back at me as if he was profoundly considering this before he changed the subject, making an abrupt U-turn.
“Do you not want to talk about last night?”
My vibe dropped spontaneously. “I’m sorry, my bad. You told me you didn’t, I hoped...”
“Talking about it would help?”
“Something like that, yeah.”
I proceeded to recount the events of last night from the moment he left me outside. He quietly listened without interjecting. He was a good listener, especially for a guy.
“The fuck? You wrote a note and skipped out on the poor bastard?”
“Hey, don’t be judging me. You wanted the details,” I pouted.
My phone buzzed.
Raven: Parking Now. See ya in 5.
Our food hadn’t arrived yet, and I was hungry.
Now I had to deal with Mr. Non-Committal judging my sorry ass.
He raised both hands in surrender. “Not judging, um… more surprised than anything.”
“Surprised a woman would be the one to make a run in the early hours of the morning?” I teased.
“No,” he laughed. “It’s the way you talked about him last night and the way your entire body lit up talking about him now. The emotion in your eyes, your voice...” he sighed and raked his hands up the side of his five o’clock shadow.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, it’s not an observation of your character at all, especially since I’ve known you for a whole two minutes.” He paused when Wednesday pawed at his leg for a pat. “But the way you talked about Will and your past over dinner last night, all the demons which have followed you around since your world blew up and the passion radiating from you today, I would have expected you to beg him for the happily ever after you deserve.”
I was taken aback by this statement, and it did not sit well.
Do I take offense to this, or is there truth in his words?
What if I ran because it is what I’ve learned to do?
To protect my heart.
Have I made a terrible mistake I will regret forever?
My leg started to bounce under the table as anxiety kicked in full force.
“Chloe, I apologize if my take on this is way off. One thing I have learned in my forty-one years is regret has the power to destroy you. And sometimes, there is no going back.”
There was a painful acceptance in the depth of his eyes.
“In your situation, you have been offered a second chance, at least for the closure you needed to move on. What I am hearing is a fear of the unknown. You’re making assumptions based on what you believe you know, and you’re reacting instead of acting on your true feelings and desires.”
If his words didn’t have me blubbering, I’d be telling him to take his bipolar meds already. This was not advice given by a shallow man or one with intense commitment issues. No, Sean sounded as if he was a damaged soul doing life the best way he knew how with what is left of him.
When I sort out my own mess, I’ll happily play matchmaker for him and Raven.
Speaking of whom, would be here at any moment.
I wiped my finger along my lower eye lid to try to mask the fact I had been crying like a bitch. And now to explain everything again to Raven.
Ugh.
Tex patted my knee. “There’s time to make it right if you want to know if there is something still there, more than a night of scorching hot sex.” He smirked and continued, “You may never know this side of me again, so let me finish by saying this, when you’re making forever decisions, never be too hasty to make them.”
I nodded. “How did I get so lucky to run into you today?”
His eyes flicked back in his head. “It’s what all the chicks say.”
“Chloe.”
My head snapped up when Raven sang out. Tex moaned beside me, the kind which said, ‘I’m so fucked.’ I chuckled and jumped up to hug my best friend.
“Y
ou okay, girl?” Her gaze narrowed in on Tex behind me. “Is this Will?” Her eyes widened.
Raven’s inside voice was louder than most people’s outside voice.
Tex came to stand with us while Wednesday could have cared less about the commotion and more about the plates of food being served at the adjacent table.
“Sorry to disappoint you. I’m Sean.” He nodded in my direction. “Your friend, Chloe, here prefers to call me Tex.”
Raven glanced at me in confusion and met his extended hand with hers. I wanted to help by pushing her bottom jaw up a notch before the drooling commenced.
“Raven,” she offered. “And not at all disappointed,” she added with a flirtatious grin.
It seems my matchmaking skills might not be required after all.
“Okay,” I interrupted, and they finally let go of each other. The grins on both their faces were the epitome of lust.
“I was about to check on the status of our order, would you like to eat with us now that you’re here?” Tex offered.
Raven declined politely and settled in across from me to get the low-down in the briefest possible fashion.
“Lucky I checked. The kitchen staff misplaced our order.”
My stomach growled in contempt as Tex joined us again.
“Okay, so I’ve missed a lot in the past twenty-four hours and want all the details, but first, point me in the direction of a bathroom? I damn near didn’t make it here,” Raven declared.
One of the waitstaff overheard and directed her to the opposite side of the café.
When Raven was out of earshot, I whipped around in my seat to address Tex. He, of course, was busy following Raven’s ass in her low-as-fuck denim cut-offs.
Her hair matched her name with a shine made for shampoo commercials. Her five-six athletic build was courtesy of years’ worth of gymnastics and cheerleading. And fuck! She has the most stunning rack. Women across the globe idolized her assets.
Me, I am women across the globe.
“Ahem,” I cleared my throat, pulling his attention back to me.
Busted, pal.
“Don’t say a fucking word, Tequila Girl.” He laughed.
“I’ve been tempted to ignore my rules in the past but never acted on the temptation. Your friend, however…” He shook his head from side to side, “… I’m having trouble remembering those rules even exist.”
I laughed loudly. “Rules are made to be broken, Sean. It’s what makes life fun.”
“Oh yeah? So, you’re going to call Will and tell him you want to explore a new life with him?”
“I never said I wanted that,” I defend.
“Yet you never said you didn’t,” he countered with a sly wink.
Chapter Fourteen
Promise Me
“And I promise you this; no matter who enters your life, I will love you more than any of them.” ~ Unknown
WILL
The moment I became aware of the sun peeking through the once moonlit window, I immediately sensed the loss of her presence. My heart full, my body sated, but the air I breathed was now empty, void of the joy Chloe naturally brought to any room she resided in.
Regretfully, I sighed and released every negative emotion and concentrated on the incredible events of our night together. I would be forever grateful for those moments, the words spoken and the forgiveness exchanged between us. A night of passion, of lessons learned, and as Chloe would have it, promises to behold our future.
I was surprised as I walked into the central area of the apartment, finding it substantially more sizable than it appeared last night. We could have been anywhere in the world, and still, all I would have remembered was her.
And me.
Together.
I’m drawn to a note on the counter, and a sense of déjà vu hits me. I picked it up with shaky hands, and my eyes slowly browsed over the beautiful handwritten note.
Dear Will,
I will keep this short with little left to say after last night.
Mostly, I want to thank you for giving me the closure I needed. To know you believe I was worth fighting for gives me the strength and belief I need to move forward with life.
I hope you also found what you were looking for and now have what you need to move on without looking back.
My wish for both of us is to live the life we once believed we would live together, in our own way, with our own families.
With every great love comes a lesson we may choose to file away or use to make our next love more epic.
Choose epic, baby. I will love you every day for the rest of my life, but I release the part of you capable of love to your wife. Make your love for her epic because she deserves all of you. And you, her.
Promise me you will never fail to fight.
Forever yours,
Chloe xx
She fucking knew about Amanda.
A laugh erupted from me as I folded the note, filed it away for safekeeping, and placed it in my wallet, where I carried Amanda’s message and had hidden my wedding band many months ago. Suddenly, everything made sense, and hurricane clarity hit me for the first time in a decade.
“I promise, little one, I promise I will never fail to fight.”
If I don’t, all of this would have been for nothing.
I will not allow the best part of my life to mean nothing at all.
I had failed to fight once before, and ten years on, the demons still haunted me. I ruined us by walking away and not fighting for the love we had.
I owed it to both of us to back up my words with the actions which failed me all those years ago. This was my chance to redeem myself.
I had to try whether Chloe wanted me to or not.
The transparency of the situation hit me like a curve ball from left field.
Sucker-punched me in the heart.
My love for Amanda was born out of convenience. Situational circumstances. Our love was never going to be like my love for Chloe. We both recognized our initial hook-up was a rebound opportunity for me.
Second chances I believed in, but to experience two epic loves in one lifetime? No. Chloe owned my heart and always would.
Last night might have been enough for her, but I would spend the rest of my life fighting to show her she is all I will ever want. Even if it took until my last dying breath and she never took me back, I learned one thing for sure.
I will never be with Amanda again.
That chapter of my life was written in the sand. An eternity with Chloe was written in stone long before then.
I returned to the bedroom, freshened up, and pulled on my jeans. My shirt smelled of Chloe, and I buried my face in her essence before throwing it on and buttoning it three parts of the way up.
Swiping my phone and wallet from the island in the kitchen, I headed for the door.
I had no idea where I was headed, but I had to find her.
Despite the early hour of the day, the summer heat caused beads of sweat to form on my brow. As I walked in the direction I came from last night, I rolled up my sleeves to my elbows.
Gazing up and down both sides of the street, desperate to find Chloe, I made the call I had always known I would have to make.
It had taken an earth-shattering night of passion and lust to remind me of the truth.
Of my true love.
The call went straight to voicemail. I left a short message.
“Amanda, it’s me, Will. We need to talk in person. I have a few things to sort out here in Brisbane, then I’m coming straight to you. This can’t wait.”
Ending the call, I immediately dialed Chloe’s number. It rang a few times before the call was unanswered. My heart plummeted, but I held my head high.
My only option was to continue to call her, follow her on social media, and message her repeatedly until she gave in and answered me.
Needing her to be assured I was not going to give up, I flicked off a quick text.
Will: Call me, I’m not leaving Brisbane un
til we’ve discussed last night.
I continued along the riverfront in the direction of my hotel, continually scouring my surroundings expecting Chloe to miraculously appear.
The closer I got to my room, the less hopeful I became. My shoulders fell, and my feet began to drag. My confident brisk walk had turned to a wimpish sad shuffle.
Pulling my phone from my jeans pocket to call one more time, I heard it. Her beautiful laugh. It was one of the most unique sounds I had ever heard, and there was no mistaking it.
Immediately, my legs carried me in the direction of my heart.
Seated outside under an umbrella in the shade of an old oak tree, Chloe sat at a small table.
With the guy from last night?
What. The. Fuck?
Another woman about Chloe’s age, shiny black hair and dark features appeared and joined their table.
My heart ached while I watched her. How was she smiling and laughing after the night we shared?
Did it not impact her at all?
No, I refused to believe it. She was in for a rude shock if she assumed I would stand back or take a seat on the sidelines this time.
All my confidence came flooding back, and I puffed out my chest.
Metaphorically.
My eyes zeroed in on Chloe, and everything around me fell away. As I approached the table, the chit-chat dwindled, and I became the center of attention.
Chloe rose from her chair, shock evident in her eyes. “Will, what are you doing here?”
“The Will?” The motherfucker had the gall to ask, dressed in his muscle tee with a puppy dog sitting at his feet.
Biting my tongue, I focused only on Chloe.
“Please, may we talk?”
The guy beside her also stood, his fluff ball standing at his side zeroing in on me.
The fuck?
He offered his hand to me. “The name’s Sean, great to meet ‘ya.”
Taking his hand in a firm grip, I shook it in the mandatory fashion, my eyes darting to him for a moment. He was all smiles and looked back to Chloe with a peculiar expression.
“I met Chloe last night while she waited for you, and oddly enough, I ran into her this morning.”
