by Amy Jarecki
Allowing her gaze stray to Matt, Rebecca shifted in her seat. Since they sat down, he hadn’t stopped staring at her. Sure, he turned around and flew back from California, but she needed to think. Though she admitted she liked him a lot, the pain from the incident at the condo still tore at her heart. And that woman was so different compared to her. Monica probably spent two hours getting ready every morning. Rebecca took less than one. Would Matt expect her to be like that? Matt stared. She cringed.
The waitress showed up with their pancakes. Matt’s eyes shifted away from Rebecca momentarily. “Thanks for getting the food out so fast.”
Amanda slathered her blueberry pancakes with syrup. “I can’t wait for our trip to the shore.”
“What about Christmas? It’s tomorrow,” Rebecca said.
“Sure, Christmas is always fun. But all my friends are talking about the shore.”
Matt washed down a bite of French toast with a sip of coffee. “What does a pack of teenagers do at the beach in February?”
Amanda’s eyes lit up. “We take our coats and run through the sand, look at the shops on the boardwalk, go dancing, you know. It’s fun, but I wouldn’t expect someone like you to understand.”
“Someone like me?” Matt knit his brows. “You might be surprised what I understand.”
Amanda glanced out the window and put her hand over her mouth. “I doubt it.”
Rebecca gave her a stern glare. “Knock it off.”
After eating, Matt looked like he could have fallen asleep face down on the table. “I’ll drive you back.”
“You sure?” Rebecca clutched her purse. “We could call a taxi so you can go home.”
“I just drank a whole pot of coffee. I’ll be good for another five hours or more.”
He pulled into the driveway and turned to the backseat. “Mandy, I’d like to talk to your mom for a minute.”
Amanda patted Rebecca’s shoulder. “You sure, Momma?”
“Yeah. You go get warm.” After Mandy headed for the house, Rebecca sucked in a labored breath. “You’re tired. I’m tired. Why don’t we do this some other time?”
Matt hesitated. “True, I haven’t slept, but I need to say this. It won’t take long.”
She folded her hands over her purse. “All right.”
Matt twisted and faced her. “You’ve got to know that I’m sorry. I’m sorry for my past. I moved from Malibu to get away from plastic people like Monica. I like being with you, showing dogs, working on football plays with Ryan, taking Amanda’s lip. I never thought I’d like that stuff, but I do. Most of all, I like you. Please, please don’t take that away from me.”
Rebecca stared out the windshield, the heater blowing warm air in her face, making her lips chap. Her mind raced with a myriad of thoughts trying to overpower the one her heart screamed for her to acknowledge. It was Christmas for goodness sakes—the time of giving.
“Rebecca?”
Chapter Sixteen
Matt’s heartbeat raced while he waited for Rebecca to respond.
She faced him. “What are you doing tomorrow?”
“Only thing on my plate is to pick up my parents.”
“Maude is coming tonight and we’re going to midnight mass. You’re welcome to go with us, otherwise bring your parents for dinner tomorrow when they arrive. I’ve got a huge ham.”
“Midnight mass?”
“Yes. At St. Peter’s. I’m an Episcopalian.”
“I’ve never been.”
“Never been to church?”
He ran his hand across the leather gear shift handle. “No. My parents aren’t religious.”
“Well then, I’ll see you here at ten o’clock tonight. You can’t go through life without experiencing a holy ritual observed by millions.”
“All right then, it’s a date.”
She sliced her hand through the air. “Not a date. Church with the family. And dinner?”
“Thank you. I’ll be winging it with the folks.”
“Okay. Don’t be late.” Rebecca turned her head so fast she didn’t allow a mere second for him to kiss her. She opened the door and rushed through the frigid air to the house.
As Matt drove home, he breathed a sigh of relief. Though Rebecca slipped into her “all business” attitude, she had not pushed him away. He was learning that she needed time to mull things over and make decisions. He feared that if he pressed her too hard she might shut him out.
Passing the mall parking lot packed with last minute shoppers, a whistle passed his lips. His presents were already under the tree.
Has Rebecca noticed?
Ryan slipped them into the house for him before he flew to Los Angeles.
Barely able to keep his eyes open, Matt cranked up the music
Midnight mass? Well, I never thought I’d be showing Chihuahuas, so why not give religion a try? If it wins Rebecca’s favor, I’m in.
His mind still raced through the events of the past twenty-four hours when he pulled off his clothes, fell into bed and wrapped himself into the feathery warmth of his comforter. Monica’s deviousness and then his mother’s disappointment ate at him. Thank goodness she and Dad were coming out. He hated leaving them hanging.
As he relaxed, his mind turned to Rebecca. He couldn’t tell if she had been happy to see him. Sure, she was surprised, but happy? Then again, she was in the middle of a crisis.
Great timing, Matt.
The alarm woke him at six p.m. His head pounded, punishing him for sleeping through the middle of the day and deviating from his routine. His body insisted on regularity. Washing down a couple of ibuprofen with a diet soda, he put on his P90X DVD and launched into a ripping workout. An hour of alternating chin-ups, sit-ups and push-ups would either kill him or beat his headache into submission.
Matt chose a pair of khakis with a navy nautical sweater and brown loafers as a safe middle-of-the road bet for church. He arrived fifteen minutes early and joined Maude and Ryan in waiting on the couch for Rebecca and Amanda to come down.
When footsteps tapped the stairs, he jumped up to meet her. “You’re festive tonight.” His eyes trained up her red dress topped with a velvet emerald green bolero jacket.
Rebecca’s eyes met his but Matt sensed her unease. “Thanks.”
They agreed that Matt would drive and he offered Maude his arm when they walked into St. Peter’s. Somehow he ended up sitting at the end next to the endearing grandmother with Rebecca ignoring him on Maude’s other side. The darkened church lit by only candles with the wafting smoke of incense seemed eerily surreal. Maude helped him follow the service and held the hymnal as they sang carols, which were the only thing he found familiar.
Was it the late hour or his system being off from lack of sleep? It was too difficult to try to reason but the spirit in the sanctuary transported him to a level he had never experienced, almost like floating. His bass voice sang out with the final hymn of Silent Night, while the candles were snuffed, ending with a moment of divine silence.
Tears formed at the corners of Matt’s eyes. He pulled out a handkerchief and wiped his face, pretending to blow his nose.
Maude leaned toward him. “You get it. I can tell.”
***
Rebecca rose early, sipping her tea while baking more cookies and preparing for the big feast.
Amanda, the first to come down, gave her a warm hug. “Merry Christmas, Momma.”
“Merry Christmas, darling.”
“You look busy.”
“Yep. Matt’s going to bring his parents over for dinner.”
Amanda crossed her arms and her hip jutted to one side. “Why is Matt coming? He spends too much time here.”
Rebecca stirred the snicker doodle dough. “Hmm, but it’s Christmas.”
Amanda snatched a pinch of dough and stuck it in her mouth. “That’s what I mean. It’s family time and I don’t want him moving in on my family.”
“Stop.” Rebecca shook her wooden spoon. “It’s Christmas, the time of
goodwill and good cheer. Matt’s new to Jersey. He doesn’t know anyone here.”
“Hells bells—I’ll allow it just this once.” Amanda ran her finger around the inside of the bowl, stealing a healthy chunk. “Can I wake up Ryan?”
The day progressed like most Christmases, though this time, Rebecca was a wreck, worrying about Sara and the puppies, meeting Matt’s parents and what they would think, especially since he had turned around and run out of their house. And why had he done that? And what really happened with blondie?
She had dinner ready when Matt arrived with two bottles of wine and his apologetic but endearing parents. Rebecca expected two wealthy snobs from Malibu, complaining about the long flight and discomfort of their first-class seats, but she found Ralph and Sally Johnson to be genuine everyday folk.
“How’s Sara?” Matt asked.
“She’s much better—tucked away in the studio with her puppies.”
Matt gave Maude a hug and led the group into the dining room. “Ryan, do you think you can pop the cork on the wine?”
“Sure, if I can have some too.”
“Nice try.” Rebecca plucked the bottles from Ryan’s hands, making fast work of uncorking it.
“It smells delicious,” Sally said, sitting in the chair that Ralph pulled out for her.
Once seated, Matt poured the wine and raised his glass. “I’d like to toast Rebecca, our cook. Thank you for opening your home to us wayward Johnsons. You are indeed a gentlewoman and a scholar. Merry Christmas.”
The table erupted with cheers and cries of “Merry Christmas” and Ryan started passing the food. Maude and the Johnsons caught up on the small talk that is a prerequisite when you first meet someone.
Savoring her favorite meal, Rebecca listened to the prattle. Ralph stabbed a piece of ham with his fork. “We’re absolutely thrilled that Matt’s found such a nice woman to love.”
Rebecca stopped mid chew, her eyes shooting across the table to Matt who sat-up, frozen, glass held to lips. Before she could think of something to say, Maude piped in. “I think they’re the most adorable couple. Did you see him kiss her on TV?”
Amanda’s chair screeched across the floorboards. “Mom?”
Rebecca coughed. “Matt, I think our folks may be a bit misled here.”
Matt set his glass down. “Er, yeah. We’re just friends, you guys.”
Sally wiped her mouth. “Son. I think I know when you’re in love and you’re a damned fool if you don’t recognize it yourself.”
“Of all the…” Amanda threw her napkin on her plate and fled from the room.
Rebecca shoved back and followed with Matt on her heels. “Amanda!”
Before ascending the stairs, Rebecca turned. “It’s better if I talk to her alone.”
Matt pulled an angry quarterback face. “I’d like to talk to her too.”
Rebecca thought to discourage him but hesitated when the storm behind his blue eyes turned into a tempest. “Let me go in first then you can talk to her if she’ll listen.”
Rebecca cracked open the door.
“God, Mom, why did they have to come to dinner? They ruined Christmas.”
Rebecca clenched her fists and delivered her words with a stern tone. “I think you’re taking a simple misunderstanding too far.”
“A misunderstanding? He jumped on a plane and flew back here just to talk to you. What does that say, Momma?”
“Okay. He likes me.”
“He likes you a lot.”
Rebecca folded her arms. “All right, he likes me a lot.”
“You like him too.”
Rebecca paced. “Sure I do. But he hasn’t proposed or anything.”
“Yeah, but he might.”
She stamped her foot and turned to face her daughter. The red-hot temper Rebecca suffocated for the past few months finally burst through her roaring mouth. “That’s enough! I’ve had it with your angst. It is my right as a human being to be friends with Matt Johnson or whomever I so choose.”
Amanda pounded her fist into her pink fluffy pillow. “Yeah right, and what about me and Ryan? You’re just going to ditch us…”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Rebecca slammed the door, stomped down the stairs and glared at Matt. “She’s all yours.”
A half-hour later, Matt resumed his place at the table, the guests deep in conversation about the differences between the East and West Coasts.
Puffy-eyed Amanda appeared in the doorway. “Would anyone like pie and ice-cream?”
Rebecca blinked twice. She assumed that Amanda would continue to sulk in her room until the guests left, but her daughter served dessert with a fixed smile. She took her seat at the table and ate a piece of apple pie as if her world was in complete harmony.
After dinner, Matt helped with the dishes. Spraying down the roaster, Rebecca leaned in. “What did you say to her?”
“We came to an understanding.”
“Oh?”
“It’s between us.”
“I see. Good for you.” Rebecca patted his shoulder and kept her hand there a bit longer than necessary.
God, his muscles even bulge when he does the dishes.
Her resolve cracked. “We saved your presents so we could open them with you.”
Matt’s face lit up, as if she’d just opened the door she’d been forcing closed—well, maybe she cracked it. “You did?” He tossed the sponge in the skink. “Let’s get the kids.”
They gathered around the tree, where four presents remained.
Matt picked up a small gift bag and handed it to Amanda. “Ryan helped me pick these out.”
She hesitated as her eyes darted toward her brother.
“Come on, Mandy. Open it.”
“Thanks.” Amanda pulled out the white tissue paper and peeked inside. She removed a small velvet box and opened it. “Pearls.” She looked at Matt and smiled. “They’re awesome. Thank you.”
Matt grinned and passed Ryan a much bigger gift bag. “Here you go, sport.”
“For me?” Ryan yanked out the paper and threw it over the back of the couch. “Freakn’ awesome!” He held up a leather Philadelphia Eagle’s jacket. “I’m going to live in this, man.”
“I thought you’d like it.”
Ryan immediately put it on, a big smile on his face. “I love it!”
Rebecca reached under the tree and handed Matt a package. “You’re next. It’s not much, kind of last minute.”
“For me?” He grinned and made a production of untying the perfect bow and slipped his thumb under the tape so he wouldn’t tear the paper.
“Why not rip it? You always tear into your presents at home,” Sally said.
Matt’s eyes shifted toward his mother. “I’m savoring the moment.” He opened the box and pulled out an assortment of homemade cookies. With wide eyes, he licked his lips. “Sweeeet! It looks like you nailed all my favorites.”
With a knowing grin, Rebecca leaned forward and cast her gaze into the box. Beside the cookies was rolled paper, tied with a red bow. Pulling on the string, he leafed through the sketches of his condo, letting out an appreciative whistle. “Wow. These are perfect. I never could have come up with this in my lifetime, but you captured my ideal with a pencil.”
The tension in Rebecca’s shoulders eased. “Sorry I didn’t have a chance to finish, but it’s nice to know I’m on the right track.”
Matt picked up a professionally wrapped tiny package. “Your turn.”
Rebecca’s eyes shot around the room at the expectant faces. She felt a tremor in her breath as she popped open the tape, revealing a square jewelers box.
God, I wish he wouldn’t have.
She held the black leather box up to her eyes and opened it wide enough to peek inside. Her jaw dropped. “Oh my. How absolutely exquisite.” Smiling, she opened and turned the box to reveal a lapis necklace and earrings set in a golden open heart design—met with voices of appreciation.
“When I saw the set it reminded me of your eyes
.” Matt’s voice grew husky. “I hope you like it.”
His smile, less self-assured than usual, made Rebecca realize how hard it must be for him in this awkward situation. There he sat, a great single guy who fell into her hectic life—teenaged kids, crazy dog shows, her own excess baggage—and he’s hooked. Putting aside her smoldering hurt, she wondered if he needed some time away to think about what his feelings were and if this was a life he could honestly commit to.
Chapter Seventeen
Once the holidays were over, Rebecca didn’t need to mention anything to Matt about spending time away. He left Patches in her care and traveled to South Carolina to implement lean manufacturing for a new client. This also allowed Rebecca time to sort through her own conflicting emotions.
The kids back in school, she sat at her desk mesmerized by the falling snow. The startling bell of her office phone brought her back to unwelcomed reality. “Lee’s Darling Chihuahuas.”
“Hi, honey.”
“Hey, Momma. Is everything okay?”
“Yes. I’m calling because it’s time you and I had a chat about Matt.”
“Matt?”
“Come on, honey, you know that man’s head over heels in love with you. At Christmas you held him at arm’s length and weren’t about to let his fingers anywhere near the cookie jar.”
Rebecca rolled her eyes. “You’re meddling.”
“As your Momma I’ve earned a right to meddle. I’ve watched you wallow in a pig sty of self-pity for over two years and it’s time you moved on. That man’s a real catch and you’ve completely lost your mind if you’re not going to reel him in.”
Rebecca choked back sudden tears that threatened. “But the kids…”
“The kids? Kids adapt. And have you considered how your perpetual misery affects them?”
“But Amanda can hardly stand the thought of Matt as a friend let alone a boyfriend.”
“You know I love that dear child but since when does Amanda make decisions for you? You got to do right by yourself in order to have the strength to make others happy. You know what I’m saying?”
“Yeah. I know.”
