by Mia Watts
David strengthened his resolve. He had to see it through—see if Nate would take the chance on him. God, he hoped so. “I’m in love with you.”
“Possible,” Nate hedged. “Or in love with the idea of me and tangled up in the adrenaline of coming out. You’ll regret it the minute the sun comes up tomorrow. I don’t want to be your regret.”
“I came out to the department. You don’t think that counts for something?”
“I think it means you saw a means to an end. I hope you thought it through. Coming out could cost you your friends, your career. Is sex with me worth that?” Nate asked. “Did you think telling people you’re gay would get you in my bed?”
The words sounded harsh, hit like static in David’s ears. He wanted Nate. He wanted a future with him. More than sex, because David was pretty sure Nate wanted him bad enough to give in if David persisted. It was the honesty David wanted. The freedom to hold Nate’s hand in public or tell him over the phone he loved him while working a case. He wanted to come home to him and breathe in his scent from the crook of his neck when they held each other after a long day.
“I’m worth it,” David corrected. “I’m worth being honest to. I’m worth being happy. I’m worth standing up for, Nate.” Angrily, he walked to where Nate stood. “I’m worth respecting whether or not other people do. Of course I want you! You’re the only guy I ever wanted to risk exposure for, but because you showed me that there’s nothing to fear. I’ve been crippled and you put it all in perspective. You finally gave me a reason to fight.”
David crowded closer. “I’m worth the fight, damn it! Even if you won’t have any part of me, I won’t regret what I did today. I’m free, Nate. Goddamn you, I’m free!” He swallowed past the lump forming in his throat. “And I want you freely with me,” he said, softer. He reached up, stroked Nate’s cheek. “Please.”
“I’m a forever kind of guy, David.” Nate caught his hand, though, and pressed it to his cheek, kissed the heel of David’s hand.
David’s breath tangled in his throat with hope, and fear, and longing, and desperation. “So am I. I just never found the guy I wanted my forever with, until you.”
Nate’s gaze locked on his. David saw the moment understanding dawned on him. “You mean it,” he said, acknowledging the truth out loud. “What happens when things get rough and the questions start flying? What happens when you’re tempted to back down?”
“I admit it’s scary, and I can see where it’ll get difficult, but I’m not hiding. I meant it. I’m out. Hopefully, I’m out with you.”
“I don’t know.” Nate’s voice wavered.
David knew one thing for certain—Nate liked the way he kissed. If he could do nothing else, he’d prove his words with his body and hope Nate didn’t leave him in the rubble of aftermath. It would kill him.
Chapter Four
David’s hand slid from Nate’s cheek to the back of his head, jerking him forward. Their noses bumped. David adjusted, tipping his head oh so slightly to the side before sealing Nate’s lips with his own. The bottom dropped out of Nate’s stomach. His ears roared as pleasure swamped his senses.
Damn his lips!
Nate had two seconds before he quit thinking with his brain and led with his cock. David had no idea what can of worms he’d opened in coming out. He’d need time to adjust, time to take stock of what he wanted, not leap into a long term committed relationship, no matter what David thought he wanted. No matter what Nate hoped David wanted.
It felt real. All of it felt real. David’s firm chest, steely and warm flattened against his. David’s lean hips and thickened cock rolling sharply along his. David’s strong fingers gripping him close no matter how Nate pushed. Real and incredible. Fucking amazing if he chose to believe it. Could he?
With a strangled groan, Nate wedged an arm between them and levered his elbow until they had distance. He shoved David backwards. The sudden release of David’s demanding hold sent them both stumbling. David bumped the armrest on the couch and nearly toppled over. Nate caught himself before hitting the wall.
David looked back at him. His lips were swollen and pink, every muscle in his body held taut as he waited Nate out for a determination. David’s cock rose insistently behind his tented fly. He didn’t move, but held himself upright on the couch arm. His blue eyes smouldered beneath the shaggy hang of his chestnut hair. Dishevelled, hungry, fearful, David’s countenance spoke directly to Nate’s heart.
This look, worn by David, should have been bottled as an aphrodisiac. Fucking sexy as hell and all for Nate. What he knew about David told him the man wouldn’t back out of a decision no matter how difficult the circumstances became. He wouldn’t give up now that he was out.
So what held Nate back?
He’d been so certain of his own stance, secure in knowing he wanted David Rook but wouldn’t have him. Now that David offered himself without reservation, why did he resist? Hypocrisy slapped him into awareness.
He’d accused David of being afraid to face his identity and take on a meaningful relationship. What if it had been Nate who’d been afraid? Had he been banking on the expectation that David wouldn’t come to him? There was security in the knowledge that he didn’t have to open his heart up to David and risk the hurt he could cause.
Yet there he was. David was the strong one. David fought himself and Nate for the privilege of being gay and open. David gave himself up to Nate’s rejection and the longer Nate waited, the more resigned those sexy blue eyes got as they glittered with agony.
God, I’m hurting the one man I most want the right to love. What the fuck am I thinking?
Nate launched himself at David, taking him to the couch. The angle bent Nate awkwardly. He wrapped his arms around David and rolled to the floor, briefly knocking the wind out of himself in the process. Momentum carried them too far, smacking David against the legs of the coffee table and stopping them both on their sides. David grunted, a sexy husky sound that rumbled against Nate’s ear and sent shivers down his spine. Nate’s balls tightened with anticipation.
“Is this a yes?” David asked, throwing his leg around Nate’s waist and hooking him closer.
Nate shoved the coffee table and rolled on top. “Didn’t hear the proposal.”
“I suppose you’ll want a ring.” David mused.
Nate leant down, demanding and receiving a kiss from the wisecracking mouth. David kept pace, thrusting his tongue into Nate’s mouth to rub sensually against Nate’s. Like a starving man who’s just discovered culinary excellence, Nate slowed down, savoured the feel of David beneath him.
He pulled back, looking into David’s flushed face. Nate grinned at him. “Hell, yeah. Matching cock rings.”
David laughed, joyously. “Just don’t go flashing your junk at other men to show them you’re taken.”
Nate pretended to give it some thought. David laughed, grappling him and knocked the coffee table over in the process. “Oh, shit! Sorry about that.”
“No worries. I’ve got plenty of wood right here,” he said, his voice turning husky as he rubbed his cock against David’s.
David exhaled sharply, met Nate’s gaze with a hungry one of his own.
Fuck if that look didn’t stroke his balls. Nate rested fully against him, held his head in his hands as he plied David’s lips with soft kisses. “I love your mouth,” he murmured between kisses. “I love the way it feels on me. I love the way it moves when we kiss, trembles when I do something you like.”
David groaned. “No one’s ever said that.”
“They’re all idiots.” Nate moved his hands down David’s body, yanked his shirt out of his pants and slid underneath to feel the hard muscles he’d only suspected were there until now. David’s smooth flesh heated his palms and Nate found himself searching out every dip and rise along his packed abdomen. Nate’s stomach knotted when David flexed and squirmed beneath him.
“I love what you’re doing to me,” David whispered under Nate’s lips. “Let me
touch you.”
“Not done yet.”
“Don’t have to be,” David answered. He explored Nate’s back with the same thorough drag, until the trapped fabric between them kept him from lifting his shirt higher. “Gonna have to buy you a new shirt.”
Nate heard the words but it didn’t register until he heard the thick ripping sound and felt cooler air touch his back. Then a fit of chuckles hit him. He’d tried so hard to keep David away, calling him a playboy who dabbled outside the closet before shutting himself back in again. Yet, confessed and out, David’s enthusiasm humbled Nate with its straightforward quest to pleasure them both.
Nate nuzzled under David’s ear. “Hot move you got there.”
“You liked that, huh?”
“Yeah.”
“Wasn’t sure, since you laughed.”
Nate rocked his hips into David’s, groaning when their cocks rubbed against each other through layers of clothing. “Any doubt now?”
“None,” David said, roughly. He turned his head to the side, forcing Nate to look at him. David stroked his cheek. “Make love to me.”
Nate’s breath stalled. The liquid need in David’s eyes held more than a request for physical connection. He was asking Nate to love him back. Nate lightly rubbed the sides of their noses together, and tried to convey the depth of his own heart through the answer in his eyes. “With every breath.”
He reached between them, pulling off David’s shirt and the remnants of his own while keeping his eyes locked on him as much as possible. David helped, fumbling with their pants closures.
“Wait,” Nate said, breathlessly. He reached into his back pocket and retrieved a condom. He held it up between them and wiggled his brows. “Can’t forget this.”
David’s slow smile was like a hit to the gut. “You’re going to need a lot more than one.”
“Later,” he answered, hearing the gruffness in his voice. “One dick at a time.”
They kicked off their remaining clothing, Nate sliding between David’s legs and their cocks jostling in the chaos of shucking pants, socks, and shoes. He reached over and grasped David’s gorgeous length, sending a visible shudder through him, temporarily stopping David with one shoe to go.
“Fuck, Nate, hurry up!”
Nate let him go, rolled the condom on and spat in his hands. The condom was lubed but it would still sting. He reached between David’s legs.
David’s shoe flew through the air and he hooked a digit at the ankle of his sock. Nate’s moist fingers stroking his hole made his eyes roll back. “Oh, God! Give a guy some warning.”
“Leave the sock. It’s not your ankle I’m fucking.” He plied David with another finger, tugging the tight ring, sliding in and out in a way that made David hot and cold all over.
He stretched out, lifted his knees to give Nate better access. He closed his eyes, enjoying the electric sensations until Nate surprised him again with seductive licks and light bites to his ass cheeks. “God!”
“That’s me,” Nate murmured.
David’s laugh caught when pumping fingers were joined with an enthusiastic suck to his cockhead. “Jesus Christ!”
“Him, too,” Nate quipped. He grabbed David’s ankle and in one swift move, covered the other man with his body while bringing his leg up over Nate’s shoulder. He sank balls deep.
Looking into Nate’s tightly controlled face, David wasn’t sure he’d seen a more beautiful sight than the man he loved, loving him with as much care as he could. They were both anxious, and the declaration of love between them only fuelled their desire.
“Don’t stop,” David pleaded. “Need you.”
He grunted affirmation. “Want this to be perfect.”
“There’s no other way this can be,” David assured.
Nate withdrew languorously, wringing a moan from both. Then gathering himself, he plunged forward. David’s eyes closed as sensation swamped him. There was truth to the saying that sex was better with someone you loved. They’d just started, and already his heart felt like it would burst and his cock throbbed for release.
Nate reached for David’s hand and brought it to David’s weeping shaft. Together they pumped in time to Nate’s possession. He had to see his lover’s face when he came. David trained his eyes on Nate, watching his face contort with ecstasy as they drove each other higher. Colour flushed his cheekbones and David felt the similar rush of awareness as his balls tightened.
“I love you,” Nate whispered, slowing to kiss David.
David cried out as orgasm consumed him, streaking up his cock and spilling his seed. Nate pressed their chests together, slicking them with David’s cum. His hips bucked hard and sharp against David’s ass as Nate soon followed in tremulous release.
Still linked, David lowered his leg and wrapped himself around Nate’s waist. “I love you, too.”
Nate blushed. “Was that sappy?”
“It was perfect. I’ll show you how perfect once I catch my breath.”
David squirmed, wrapping his fingers on a small cylinder at his hip, bringing it around to see what had insistently chafed him to the point of bruising during their lovemaking.
A tube of cherry Lifesavers glowed in the dim firelight. David and Nate clashed gazes with dawning horror.
“Get dressed,” David whispered.
* * * *
“We went through the house. No one’s here,” Nate whispered. He jerked on his pants, ignoring the sickly crawl along his spine.
“Inside or out, Jasper’s here, and you’re his target.”
David zipped his jeans, reached for his gun and cell. He checked the magazine, then tucked it at the small of his back before checking Nate’s gun. Slapping the magazine in with the butt of his hand, he flipped Nate’s out to him.
Nate took it and picked up his house phone. The line was silent. Dread solidified like cold lard in his stomach. He shook his head. David paled and woke his cell.
“This is Detective Rook with the Seventh. I’m at fifty-one-oh-four Hemlock requesting immediate assistance. Two-seventeen in progress. Agent Giamanti with the ATF is here. We’re armed. Phone lines cut. Evidence of a four-oh-six. Come with sirens.”
Nate readied his firearm, 911 had what they needed. A homicide attempt was in progress with evidence of a break in. With nothing more to light their way than fading firelight, they moved throughout the house.
“Clear,” David called.
“Clear,” Nate answered.
Adrenaline pumped through Nate’s veins, shook his hands. Silently, they righted the coffee table. It sagged at one corner where the leg had broken in their tumble.
David’s gaze met Nate’s. His expression was grim. Suddenly, David grabbed Nate in a bear hug. His heart tattooed a rhythm as urgent as Nate’s. Words weren’t needed. He felt the same way. He wasn’t going to let anyone hurt David, and David’s silent embrace told him the same message.
Rapid fire zips through breaking glass urged them to the floor. The outside door creaked as it swung on its hinges. A red laser danced around the room at chest level from the kitchen. Nate grabbed and squeezed David’s hand through their ragged breathing. Then letting go, he crawled to the edge of the couch, using it as a barrier. David did the same at the other end.
“Give it up, Jasper. Cizone ratted you out,” David called.
“The police are on the way,” Nate added.
Nate trained his gun on the kitchen and closed bar shutters. He noted the broken glass panes in the swinging outside door. Creeping forward, he ignored David’s signal to stop. No way he’d let David take a bullet for him.
Hell, guns were Nate’s speciality.
“Why the girls, Jasper?” David yelled.
There was a thick chuckle. “Stress relief,” presumably Jasper, answered.
“Dealing arms getting stressful?” Nate taunted.
“Not for long, Giamanti. I’m about…to exterminate…the problem.” A red dot centred on Nate’s chest.
“Nate!�
� David yelled, leapt, and tackled him to the ground as the zip-pop of bullet splitting wall reached him.
“Where are the fucking sirens?” Nate snapped, quietly.
Red light slid over them as Jasper’s dark shape loomed in the kitchen passage, bigger and broader than he expected. David rolled to his feet between Nate and Jasper, his gun steady on the intruder.
“Don’t you fucking get shot, Rook!”
Sirens wailed, distracting Jasper long enough for David to fire off a shot. Jasper’s right shoulder jerked sharply. “Sonofabitch!”
“Freeze motherfucker!”
Attention swung to the open door. A young man, legs spread, arms raised, had Jasper in his sights. There would be no missing from the ten foot divide.
“Who the fuck are you?” Jasper said, swinging his firearm.
“My new partner,” David said. “I just decided.”
Jasper tensed. Nate didn’t think, he took aim and clipped the asshole’s gun hand.
David and the other guy pounced, taking the bleeding, screaming man down as cops swarmed through the back and now busted front doors. Lights flared to life.
Nate hauled David off Jasper once he was secured by several cops. He pulled David into his arms, kissing him. David kissed back, his arms circling Nate.
“It’s about fucking time,” Derrick said, stepping over broken glass. He tipped his head. “Who’s that?”
The young, dark-haired cop stepped forward, “Knight. His new partner,” he said nodding at David.
“Rook and Knight? You’re fucking kidding me,” Derrick barked.
David grinned at Nate. Derrick faded away while Nate had David in his arms.
David hugged him tighter. “Wanna see a guy about a ring tomorrow?”
“After you recheck my measurements,” Nate answered.
“God, get a room,” Derrick muttered.
“Great idea. Hurry up and take my statement.” David took Nate’s hand, interlocking their fingers.
