Jack’s mom and mine did their version of The Three Degrees, ‘When Will I See You Again.’ It contained the line, ‘When will we share precious moments?’
It was pretty apt considering us all being together, and the fun we were having. The last time Alfie and I did karaoke, Alfie sang to me, putting his feelings out there, in front of a whole bar full of people. I felt it was only fitting that I sing something to him, by way of returning his PDA toward me.
I had heard the perfect song on the radio the other day, and I felt it was really significant in our situation. I began to sing ‘Ordinary Love’ by U2. Alfie listened, and a slow smile spread across his face. When I sang the line, ‘are we tough enough for ordinary love,’ Alfie nodded slowly, held my gaze, and mouthed, “You bet we are, baby.”
On the last word, Alfie was out of his chair stalking across the room before anyone could draw a breath. He scooped me into his arms and kissed me slowly; it was an intense moment between us.
Jack interrupted, “Is this where I run for the tent?” Alfie snickered against my mouth, and we broke the kiss. There were lots of puzzled faces in the room apart from Rosie. Alfie and I snickered at Jack’s comment, but we didn’t elaborate on it for any of them.
Stomachs were on the verge of bursting, buckets full of champagne and wine consumed, and we’d played everything from board games to PS3’s latest offerings. Christmas day was as near to perfect as it could be for all of us, barring absent loved ones. Surrounded by all my important people, apart from Elle, I’d never had such a wonderful day.
We said goodnight to Layla and Connie. Henry took them home, and as we closed the front door, my nerves began to fray. Today had given me the time to realize, for sure, that I wanted to be with Alfie. As if he knew what I was thinking, Alfie appeared by my side.
Sliding his arm around my waist, he pulled me toward him and kissed my hair. “I really want to be alone with you now.”
I licked my lips and nodded slowly. “I think I’d like that too.” Turning my head, I saw everyone either deep in conversations or eating again.
Some were out by the patio, some in the family room. “I think now would be a good time to sneak off unnoticed,” I whispered. Alfie grinned and led me by the hand in the direction of our room.
Grabbing a bottle of champagne on the way past, he tucked it under his arm. “In case we need lubrication.” He winked then wiggled his eyebrows wickedly at me.
I smirked and scooted inside the bedroom door so that he could come inside quickly. Knowing once the door was closed, unless there was a fire, no one would disturb us…not if they valued their lives, that was.
Alfie closed the door and leaned against it. The palms of his hands were flat against the door behind his back, the bottle of champagne still under his arm.
He took a sharp breath. I heard it catch in his throat. “Damn, now that we’re here, I want someone to kick me in the balls, so that I can check this isn’t yet another dream.”
I snickered. “Another one?”
I raised my eyebrows and waited for his reply. “Honey, the times I’ve dreamed about holding you in my arms, sure it was real, only to wake up and feel a deep despair at the fact we weren’t together.”
I chewed my lip, feeling horrible. Listening to the effect I’d had on Alfie made me feel so full of remorse. It had been as agonizing for him to be away from me as it was for me to be away from him.
I sat on the bed, but Alfie still remained standing by the door. “Are you going to come over here?” I asked slightly giggling at him still pressed against the door.
“Not sure.”
My smile slowly dissipated. My heart fell from my chest to my stomach. “You’re not sure? What aren’t you sure about Alfie, us?”
Tight squeezing in my chest alerted me to the fact that my heart had stopped beating, and I was holding my breath. I was confused and filled with panic. Alfie didn’t think this was a good idea any more. Struggling with the feeling of possible rejection after finally letting him in, I was in danger of losing control.
Alfie exhaled raggedly. “Yes and no.”
My heart stuttered then beat rapidly trying to make up for the lost beats. I was on my feet now, pacing and hugging myself.
“You’re not sure you want to do this again?” Immediately the words hit the air between us; Alfie’s eyes locked onto mine, and I felt our connection.
“Oh, I want to do it all right. I want nothing more in the world. I’m just not sure that if I do, and you change your mind again, I’ll ever recover from this.”
What he said devastated me. To think I had inflicted as much pain on Alfie as he had on me was crucifying me. “I really want this to work, Alfie. That’s why I took things slowly these past couple of days. Remember you did that before. I was the one lacking in self-restraint.”
Walking over to the door, I pulled the champagne bottle out of his arm and placed it on the wicker nightstand. Turning back at him, I could see that he was having an internal struggle about what was happening between us.
Reaching around him, I took his hands and placed them in mine. I tilted my head and smiled gently up at him. “Alfie, I really want to be with you. I love you with everything that I am. I need you to believe that. It isn’t going to be easy with our careers. I am oh, so, willing to do this, because there is no one in the whole of this planet who makes me feel the way you do.” I stretched up on tip toes and brushed my lips with his slowly.
His arms wrapped around me, and he pulled me hard against him. I felt the desperation in his movement. “Lily, I love you with every fucking bone in my body. You make me tremble when I’m near you. Just the sight of you fills my heart with so much love, I sometimes wonder if it will burst. You are my sun and my rain, light and shade, pleasure and pain. If we do this, promise me you won’t just bolt at the first hint that something isn’t right.”
I stared into his eyes and could see how distressed he was feeling. “I promise I’ll speak to you. I promise that I will hear what you tell me, as long as you can promise me honesty, Alfie. I promise to let you grow, as long as you do the same for me. I don’t want either of us to stifle the growth of the other.”
I laid my head on his chest and swallowed hard. This wasn’t as simple as picking up where we left off before. This time we had to learn to trust and rely on each other.
Alfie’s beautiful face lit up when he smiled affectionately, and he shook his head. “I’m sorry if I’m being a pussy.” I smirked, but I really understood where he was coming from.
“Are you showering first or am I?” I wanted to move forward, because the night was becoming sombre, and I worried that we would end up in a long-assed debate about some aspect of relationship analytics.
Alfie frowned. “Doesn’t the shower fit the both of us?”
I smirked and suddenly the mood was changing again. “Well I have still to give you your Christmas gifts. So I was going to fix things here for that while you showered.”
Alfie went off to shower but was back in less than five minutes with a towel around his waist. This was a change as well, Alfie never usually thought twice about walking around naked.
He looked so alluring, with his shiny, just showered skin and smelling so fresh and clean. Not to mention damp. Self-control was difficult, I had to fight not to whip that towel away from him like he was the biggest gift under the tree. That one thing I’d wanted at the top of my Christmas list.
“Your turn,” he cooed. My shower lasted even less than his I think. I had a small beach wrap, and I pulled that on instead of a towel. It had been hanging behind the door in the bathroom. I figured this would be easier to move around in, without inadvertently falling out of it, like I could in a towel.
Alfie was lying back on the bed when I went back into the room. He was watching MTV with the remote in his hand. When he saw me, he flicked to a radio station, playing eas
y listening music.
“C’mere, I have something for you.” I sat on the bed beside him, and I bounced, the mattress sagging a little as he adjusted himself upright and handed me a small gift box. “Do you know how hard it is to buy something for a girl who has it all?”
“Alfie the gift you gave me was amazing.”
He smirked. “Good, then you won’t mind this lot.” He chuckled nodding at the small pile between us.
Tearing the first package, I found a small red velvet box inside. I swallowed hard. Alfie snickered when he saw that my face was in conflict about what could be inside. “Don’t worry it isn’t an engagement ring.”
I cracked the box lid and there were two platinum plectrums inside. One with the letter L and one with an A engraved on it.
“I know it’s cheesy, but we like cheese now and again, right? When we’re apart, and we’re playing on stage, having these in our hands will keep us thinking about each other. The A is for you, the L is mine.”
He pushed another box at me. “This one is next.” I opened the box and saw a private jet voucher. “This is for when you’re missing me too much. You call the private airline company, and they will bring you to me, even if it is only for a few hours. I bought one of those for me too. I know we have the record label jet, but this way it’s extra security that we’re never that far from each other.”
Alfie pushed an envelope at me. “This is the second to last one, I really didn’t have much time to put a lot of thought into this, forty-eight hours is a lot of pressure to get this just right.” I smiled and touched his face.
“I think you’re doing pretty fantastic up to now.” He nodded at the envelope, and my fingers trembled as I opened it. The effect of him sitting near me was making my body hum, and I had to fight with myself to concentrate.
I slipped my finger under the end of the envelope and tore it open. My eyes flicking between him and the envelope as I made my way to what was inside. It was two tickets for the cinema. I waved the tickets at him. “Cool, we can use these over the holidays.” He smirked and took my hand.
“Lily, these tickets may just be cinema tickets to you, but for me, they are a reminder of the one night we spent just trying to be friends at my house.”
His stare was piercing. “Do you remember when you came over to watch movies with me? I couldn’t believe you came that night, I thought it was my second chance with you. Being able to watch you after you fell asleep in my arms gave me such an incredible feeling, Lily. I just wanted to hug you so tightly and never let you go. I had never seen anyone so beautiful.”
I nodded, of course I remembered it. “I have a vivid memory of that night.”
Alfie held my gaze, his eyes widening. “You do?”
I swallowed hard and prepared myself to confess. “Yeah, I woke up on your couch, and you had gone to bed. I went to find you, and you were laying naked, face down, the wrong way up on your bed.”
He snickered. “Yeah, I tossed and turned after leaving you alone on the couch. Trying to sleep when I knew you down there was painful. It took all my reserves not to carry you to my bed. I struggled to keep my hands off of you that night.”
Alfie sniffed pretending to be cocky. “I knew I should have just claimed you and not walked away from you on that couch. You wanted me too, huh?”
I smirked again still staring into his eyes. I could see the humor in his. “Actually, I did, more than you know, but there was no way I wanted to be with a man-whore who couldn’t care less about me.”
I was referring to the woman I had seen Alfie with long before he explained his job as a male escort. Before our conversation deteriorated, Alfie pushed another box at me.
“These are really for me, but you can open it and borrow it any time you like.” He winked. I pulled the wrapping off of the last package. When I opened this box it made me giggle.
Inside was a pair of panties from Victoria Secret. They were red satin Cheekinis, panties that were kind of like boy shorts, but fancy with mesh panels at the back and three red, satin bows.
“Holiday panties!” He smirked. “Just in case we get lucky.” He winked and grinned devilishly.
I chuckled softly, standing up. “Okay, you use them…if you want to get lucky I mean. You told me they were for you. I can’t decide whether I see anything I like or not, until you do.”
Alfie took them from the box by scissoring his index and middle fingers and lifted them delicately, high above his head to inspect them. He stretched the elastic at the top of the panties, placing both splayed hands down either side. Just as if there were hips inside.
He rotated the panties so that the gusset was next to his mouth, his eyes flicked to mine then he smirked. Next, his tongue flicked lightly over the gusset, small flicks, before his mouth closed over it. All the time his eyes were on mine, watching me, watching him, and damn if it wasn’t turning me on.
I heard him making sucking sounds, then his head lifted slightly and he teased one side of the gusset aside. He then made his way to the waistline and began to remove the panties from his hands with his teeth. I was breathless watching him.
Once he had the panties between his teeth, he took them in his right hand and held them to his nose, inhaling deeply. While doing this, he got off the bed and moved over to where his jeans were laying.
He picked them up and stuffed the panties in the back pocket. Turning his attention back to me, he smirked. “So, did you like what you saw?” I gasped out the breath I’d been holding. Never in my wildest thoughts did I think a woman’s panties could ever turn me on like that.
Chapter 22 –Slow Dance
I giggled at Alfie’s pantie demonstration, but the air was thick between us now. I reached over and grabbed the bag I had hidden carefully for Alfie.
“It’s your turn for gifts.” Alfie smiled and took the little square box I had carefully wrapped for him in shiny silver paper. He opened it slowly, his eyes darting between me and the package.
He chuckled loudly when he saw what was inside. He was now the proud owner of backstage passes to all our XrAid’s gigs for the upcoming tour and a copy of our CD for him to listen to when he was in rental cars.
Alfie was really disorganized with adapters and wires, and although he had every gadget existing to play music, I thought that an old-fashioned CD would be something ‘physical’ he could connect with, and the best way to be close to me.
“I didn’t want you to wait in line if you wanted to come and see me, baby,” I cooed, snickering at the pleasure I got from giving this big shot rock star passes to my gig.
“This means more to me than anything else, you know that, Lily?” I thought he meant the backstage pass, but he was waving the CD. He tapped it against the palm of his hand. “It makes me feel so fucking proud you did this, Lily,” he whispered huskily, his voice cracking a little with emotion.
He stood and tugged me off of the bed, holding my hips as he smiled sensually down at me. “Most women in your position would have just gone with the fame and their guy.”
He shook his head. “Not you. You stuck to your guns, wanting to make music, and chasing your own dreams. I fucking hated it, hated you for it, but at the same time, loved you all the more for it. I can take the fact we’ve spent that time apart. All the heartache and lonely nights, knowing now, it wasn’t in vain. This…” he tapped the plastic CD holder again, “makes me realize how different you are from any other girl. You’re one of a kind, honey. Unique.”
Placing my hand on his chest, I began to stroke his skin. The buzz from our contact was instantaneous. Leaning in, my lips peppered soft kisses over his pectorals and down his abdominal muscles.
Alfie shivered and his towel was becoming misshapen at the front as he struggled to keep his desire hidden from me. He looked down and grinned. “Fuck it,” he commented as he pulled the towel away and spread his legs slightly as he pull
ed me in tighter.
“Stop. I have one more gift for you.” Alfie was kissing down my neck and the effect it was having on my aching, wet core was exquisite torture. I’d never forgotten what this had felt like, the sensation of having his mouth on one part of my body, and its ability to wreak havoc on just about any other.
Alfie’s body was trembling as his fingers skimmed across my skin, and my body hummed in response to his touch. My last gift to him was all but forgotten in that moment.
Our body language was exclusive. Alfie told me no one had ever made him feel this way, and in my experience, I could say without a doubt it was the same for me.
His fingers hooked over the towel as he inched it down my body until my breasts were exposed. He looked up, his eyes instantly gazing into mine. The sensual look he gave me almost ended me. His mouth engulfed the nipple of my left breast, and a low growl tore up from his chest while his hand teased and stretched the nipple of my right.
Between my legs, the hot, sticky juice overflowed and was trickling onto my thigh. It took me everything I had not to try to speed up his movements, because I was going out of my mind with lust for him.
Drawing my towel wrap down my body to my ankles, I stepped out of it, and Alfie threw it aside. He took a sharp breath as his eyes climbed up my body, and he made his way back to standing, devouring every inch of me as he did this.
Teasingly, a finger began to trace my spine lightly and continued over my shoulder blade and back to the center. His hot, ragged breath was on my face as his mouth was only inches from mine.
I stared into his beautiful lust-filled eyes. He brushed my hair behind my shoulders, so gently, like I was fragile. There was another reverent silence between us before he drew a deep breath to speak.
“Hey,” he cooed. His eyes sparkled with love when his smile widened, and he shook his head. “Can’t believe you’re finally mine.” His finger tenderly traced the outline of my face, and his thumb dragged across my lips. Bending to kiss me, I felt his ragged breathing as the tension between us seemed palpable.
Everything I want: Will Alfie and Lily's love survive?... Page 18
