"Where's Luke?" Finn asked sitting up while trying not to clutch his empty stomach.
"Probably sitting on the other side of your door listening to every word. I told him he could sleep, that I would watch over you, but he set up camp outside your door like a soldier. A soldier who is still on my shit list!" she said the last part loudly towards the closed door.
"When did you get a gun, Frannie?" Finn asked his little sister quietly while pushing a lock of hair back off of her forehead. It flopped right back where it had been once he moved his hand.
She shrugged. "Before you and Luke I was alone a lot. Seemed like a good idea. And after yesterday, I'll thank the fates everyday that I did have one. That guy was…" she shuddered. "Like kind of sexy but not at all sexy, ya know?"
Finn opened his mouth to answer but Luke chose that moment to knock. "Come in," Frannie said even though it was Finn's room.
"I-uh-" he cleared his throat and kept his gaze down. "I thought I should go get some food. No one ate last night and I think Finn will be especially hungry. After…"
"You sneaky fox," Frannie said, effectively covering any awkwardness anyone would feel at finishing Luke's sentence. "I understand completely. My shit list is indeed, an uncomfortable place to be. Go, bring back pancakes. And sausage." Finn knew his sister well enough to tell she wasn't really even mad at Luke anymore.
When they were alone again, Finn laid back. "Oh god," he groaned, pulling a pillow over his face. "I made a huge fool of myself last night, Frannie."
She tugged on the corner of her lip. "You did seem really out of it."
"I was possessed. I don't know what came over me. And Christian, I don't even know where he went. And Luke won't even look at me."
"Luke is crazy about you."
He looked out at her from under his pillow. "Speaking of Luke and things that are crazy…"
"Oh, the wolf thing?"
"Yeah, the wolf thing."
Frannie did her best to tell Finn where she met Luke and what she knew about what he was. Having it spelled out to him in no uncertain terms blew Finn's mind. This type of thing didn't exist in his world…and now it did.
"…I mean, you can rebel and rebel against the notion of shifters, but scientists are discovering new species of animals all the time. And you are always hearing about tribes of people who had lived cut off from the rest of the world being found in the middle of the jungle. It isn't that big of a stretch to think, maybe there are people who also turn into animals. Remember my hamster?"
"Enrique?"
"Yeah, now that I think about it, he was probably a shifter. That's why I was always getting blamed whenever Mom was missing a twenty."
"You were always getting blamed because you were always the one who took her money."
She waved her hands dismissively. "Semantics." She froze like she'd gotten a really good idea. "I bet Enrique and Felix were in on it!"
Their older brother was the apple of their parent's eyes. Their mom did a good job hiding it, but their father gave up trying a long time ago. It was very clear that none of them had measured up to Felix the first.
Frannie left then for Finn to get dressed. The second she closed the door he wished he could bring her back inside. She was good at keeping Finn's darker side from rearing its ugly head. Now, it was his only companion.
This specific flavor of shame wasn't new. Every time Finn had woken up from a reckless bender in college, naked, most times alone, he had felt this way. Ashamed, embarrassed and empty. Only now he got to add starving and ragged to the list. His body felt like it had been wrung out like a wet dishcloth.
He stepped out of bed and pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He searched for his phone, found it in his jeans pocket but it was dead. After rummaging around for his charger he felt a sharp pang of pain slice through his stomach. He needed food badly. It hit him then, the delicious scent of pancakes and sausage. He practically sprinted from his room but the kitchen and dining room were empty.
"Frannie? I thought I smelled—" Just then he heard the front door open. Luke stepped through, his arms lined with bags of to-go boxes.
"Hey," he said, his eyes downcast.
"About yesterday," Finn began, a pit of hunger and despair gnawing at his stomach, "I'm sorry. I—"
"Please don't apologize," Luke said walking right past him.
He set the food out and grabbed plates, cups and silverware. When the table was set up, Frannie appeared from the hallway looking showered and ready for the day. "You have returned to my good graces," she said, sitting down at an empty plate and diving right into the Styrofoam boxes. "I forgot, Finners, this came for you." She set an envelope down on the table next to his charging cell phone.
He didn't look at it before sitting down and piling his plate high. His hunger pains were so bad he felt sick. He started eating. More like shoveling the food in his mouth and had gotten three pancakes down before looking up to see Frannie staring.
"Want some juice before you start choking?" Frannie asked. Luke was still looking away from him and it was driving Finn crazy.
He got it. Finn had made a fool of himself and if it weren't for Frannie, Luke would probably be gone already. Finn accepted the juice that Frannie had poured. He shoved a sausage link in his mouth and then looked down at the phone. It had charged enough to turn back on. There was a text message from Christian, he quickly opened it.
Hey man, I, uh, am not going to be around for a while. Don't worry or anything. I'll text ya when I get back into town.
Finn read the text again. He felt the pancakes turn into bricks in his stomach. He clenched his fingers around the knife and fork in his hands. His gaze fell to the envelope Frannie had set on the table. It was from the university. Trying to look casual, he opened the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper. The letterhead stated it was from the Graduate school of Psychology dated one day prior.
Dear Mr. Feller,
The Graduate School of Psychology has received your appeal to re-enter your studies. We appreciate your desire to continue your education but feel at this time you would not be a good fit for the current program. We thank you for your interest and encourage you to re-apply with the graduating seniors during next year's application period.
Sincerely,
Robert Paterson Ph.D
Finn closed his eyes. When it rains…He guessed Professor Paterson had had enough time to send out Finn's rejection letter before taking his leave of absence.
His body shook, still feeling achingly empty despite the piles of pancakes he'd shoved down his gullet. He slammed his silverware down on the table. Frannie jumped and Luke finally looked up at him. It was what was in Luke's eyes though that was the final straw. He saw it fill his eyes.
Regret.
"Don't fucking look at me like that," he snapped.
Luke winced and set down his silverware slowly.
"Finners, is it bad news?" Frannie asked with a squeaky voice.
He hated that he was the reason her voice was timid. He hated that he'd scared his one friend away and that he was such a fuck-up that the university had preemptively rejected him. He hated the gnawing ache in his gut and his itchy skin. And most of all hated that Mister I Always Want to Know What You Are Thinking had lived through one messed up night and had obviously decided that Finn was not what he was looking for.
The worst thing? He couldn't blame any of them, not his sister for sensing and fearing his crazy, not his friend for seeing through his pretenses, not the university for not wanting to get involved and not Luke for finally seeing what Finn knew the whole time, that he wasn't worth the trouble.
"No, I'm fine, I just…can't do this." It was a little dramatic, he knew that. Finn stood from the table and mumbled something about a shower to the two of them. He stomped down the hallway and into the bathroom, slamming the door and feeling like a fucking child the entire way. He was throwing a tantrum. A twenty five year old grown ass man was throwing a tantrum because li
fe wasn't going his way. And when was it?
He turned to the bathroom mirror. Only then did he notice he still held his knife and fork. Jesus, I am losing it. He went to the shower and yanked the knob, turning it on hot, full blast. The water blasted from the shower head and quickly turned scalding hot. Without bothering to go slowly, allowing his skin time to acclimate to the temperature, Finn jumped in. He gritted his teeth at the hot sprays that hit is sensitive skin like a thousand needles shoving through his skin.
He'd exited the institution with a single game plan. He'd held onto that like it was his lifeline to humanity, to people. That was gone now.
In its place were a thousand doubts and regrets. Next to those were about two million questions. Objectively, he knew stuff was happening to his body and surroundings that didn't make sense with his preconceived notion of what the world was.
He couldn't help but just feel it was all because of him, his fault. His karma? Whatever the fuck it all was it lingered over his head like cloud of steam, suffocating. Or was that because of the shower? Finn leaned over so that his forehead rested against the wall of the shower just under the spray. He braced himself with his palms, flat on the white siding and took a deep breath, fighting to calm his hyperactive breathing. He knew his mouth was moving. That he was saying something. But as disconnected as he was, he didn't know what it was until he really concentrated.
I am worthy. I am worthy. I am worthy. I am worthy.
Chapter Ten
Luke stared at the piece of paper on the table. His mate had been agitated before, but whatever was written on that page had really racketed up his confusion.
And then, Finn had caught a glimpse of the torture going on in Luke's head. He felt like such a dick.
"Luke?" Frannie said only his name, but he heard the questions behind it.
He couldn't tell her what he'd learned the night before. He'd spent the whole night awake, listening for any intruders, but he'd also been on her laptop looking up mating information like a teen-aged boy searching for porn. He'd found information. None of it gave him the warm and fuzzies. That was fine with him, since his mate wasn't experiencing any warm and fuzzies either. He knew exactly what his mate felt. He could smell it now--a new skill that had sharpened overnight. His sadness and panic were like a bitter berry that you weren't sure wasn't poisonous. It clawed at Luke's nose and throat. If this was how it smelled, Luke couldn't imagine how it felt.
"He's my mate, Frannie," Luke said finally.
She only nodded like he was saying something everyone knew.
"And his body is changing now, to compliment mine."
The wheels in her head were turning, dots were being connected. Her eyes flashed opened. "What that asshole said last night, about taking Finn and—is something like that even possible?"
"He won't get to him, but maybe. I'm looking into it. Fuck, Frannie, I've lived on my own for near twenty years, absolutely outside the shifter population. I don't know so much. But it might be possible, if Finn's body has adjusted enough."
"And what happened last night? Was that some sort of mating cycle?"
Frannie had figured out in seconds what it took Luke hours to put together. "The effects were worsened by the alcohol Finn drank. It acted like a catalyst, ratcheting up his symptoms into overdrive."
"But then when it started to wear off…" Her eyes narrowed. "Did you know this would happen? Before you and Finn…did your thing, did you know that this could happen? Don't fucking lie to me, Luke. I don't need a glock to make you disappear."
He didn't like how she was implying that what was happening to Finn and Luke was somehow a bad thing. It had blindsided Luke for sure, but the reason for it was a good thing. This changed everything in his mind. Once he was sure Finn would be safe he could begin to finally think about how his entire future had picked up from the path it was on and shifted over like a cartoon road with legs.
Once this was all sorted, Luke could see a different type of future for him and it sure as hell included Finn. "I didn't know," he bit out finally, his voice as terse as it ever had been while speaking to his curly haired pal.
"You can blow yourself if you think I don't like the idea of what is happening. I'm over the moon about this option opening up for you. It is the person, Luke. My Finn—" she rolled her eyes at his territorial expression. "Our Finn is a hard nut, wrapped in a really soft shell. I don't like the stress this is putting on him. Especially after…" she waved her hand in the air in a circular motion, like she was casting a spell that would finish her sentence.
She didn't need to.
The truth was Luke felt like the shittiest shithead in Shit Town. He hadn't been able to look at Finn all morning. Not because he didn't want to but because he couldn't look at him without wanting him. The smell of Finn's need wasn't as strong as it had been in that bathroom at the pub. It wasn't gone though. Not by a long shot. It had tantalized him all night long, knowing that Finn was on the other side of the door, in bed. At times it had only been the presence of Frannie that had stopped him.
That made him a horrible person. Finn was suffering and all Luke could think about was fucking him silly. But he couldn't, not until he knew Finn would be safe.
Frannie started clearing the table, boxing the uneaten portions up and stacking dishes. Luke looked back at Finn's spot. The letter was still there. He had an idea of what it meant. His plate still had half a pancake.
The hair on Luke's neck rose. His inner wolf growled. "I just…can't do this." That's what Finn had said before leaving the table. Now, the knife was gone from where he'd been sitting.
Luke jumped to his feet and ran to the bathroom. Fear clouded his mind. He thought back to Finn's scar and opened the bathroom door, using his shifter strength to break the cheap bathroom lock. He stepped inside, disorientated at first by a blast of steam. It cleared and Luke saw his mate, bent over like he was in pain. He couldn't smell any blood and hoped he wasn't too late.
Luke took a step forward and then heard what his mate was saying. Mumbling over and over, like a prayer.
"I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy." Finn shuddered as he spoke his entire body clenching with stress and pain.
Yes, his Finn was in pain. Luke could no longer allow it.
He stripped and stepped inside the shower, wrapping his arms around Finn. His skin felt overheated. Finn startled and then his body melted into Luke's. He moaned like an addict getting his next fix. The hormones raging inside of him probably made it feel that way. Luke's own body sang with pleasure. His wolf howled with joy. He was back where he belonged, naked with his mate.
"What are you—" Finn said but Luke gripped his chin and pulled his face around so that he could kiss him, silencing him. He speared his tongue through Finn's lip, lapping at his flavor, exploring and tantalizing his mouth. He thrust his tongue in and out, simulating what he wanted to do with his cock. Finn whimpered against him.
"I've wanted to do this since I stopped fucking you a week ago."
"What?" Finn was confused, it showed in his tone but his lust was growing exponentially. Luke felt it swelling and pouring from his body. He actually liked the idea that he made his mate so horny he could hardly think. That would be just fine with him, keep Finn well fucked so that he didn't have a chance to think about anything that made him sad or worried. Not yet, slow down. Make sure it is safe.
"It has been torture for me, Finn. Not touching you," he slid his fingers down the length of Finn's naked body. "Not tasting you." He licked his neck. "Not reaching out to take what's mine." He reached around Finn's tight body and wrapped his firm fingers around his mate's hard length. "Please don't keep it from me again," he murmured against Finn's ear while lightly stroking his cock.
"O-okay," Finn said, trembling despite the warm water pouring over both of them. He kept his face away when he said, "I thought you were tired of me."
"How the hell could you think that?"
"Because…I'm me," he finished sadly and it n
early broke Luke's heart in two. He was a shit head if he hadn't done everything in his power to make Finn realize how special, how motherfucking precious, he was to him.
He turned his mate around so that he faced him. He kissed his lips, more quickly than he really wanted. He kissed his chin, his cheeks, covering his face with his lips. "You're right, you are you and that is what I want. What's happening, to you, to your body, it's scaring the shit out of me, but it doesn't make me want you less. We need to be careful though. I can't risk putting you in a position that would endanger you. I wanted to go slow with you. Romance your socks off."
Finn put a hand against his chest, not pushing him away, but more like steadying himself. "You are you but you are mine. I hope you're okay with that, because it isn't going to change. Not ever." He grabbed Finn's wet hair and pulled his head back, his mouth opened as if by reflex. "Understand me?"
Finn couldn't nod, Luke had too tight a hold on his hair. He said he understood with his eyes though and with the way his tongue flitted out to moisten his lips. His eyes were dark with desire. It was as much as Luke could bear.
He turned his mate around again, slapping his hands against the shower wall with a loud smack. "Stay," he ordered, sliding down on his knees, reverently cupping Finn's ass. He kissed all the skin he could reach while dancing his fingers up Finn's thighs, teasing his balls and the sensitive space just below.
Finn mewled like a sexy kitten. Luke had never been a cat person before, but for Finn he would make every exception. He spread Finn's cheeks without any warning and thrust his tongue in his hole. Finn howled and Luke did it again, wrapping his arm around Finn's legs to offer some support for his buckling knees.
"Keep your hands up," Luke growled like a bastard.
Finn whimpered and straightened his legs but his body was shaking, overcome by sensation.
Luke was merciless with his tongue as he made love to Finn's ass. He wanted to brand him, to make damn sure he would never forget how Luke made him feel, how he would always make him feel. If his Finn wasn't absolutely sure of Luke's desire for him then it could spell disaster later on. Luke couldn't function with that threat over his head. Finn needed to know without a shadow of a doubt that he was Luke's and always would be. So Luke built the fires of lust, knowing Finn was as hard as he was, would be dripping as he was. But he wouldn't let either of them find release, not until the fire burned away any doubt.
Wolf's Mate Mpreg Romance Box Set Page 8
