“Wait here.” He disappeared inside and I kicked rocks with the toe of my shoe. What did he have hidden in there that he didn’t want me seeing?
Charm came back out a few minutes later, pushing a baby blue Harley. He tossed me a spare jacket. “Put this on. I’m gonna grab you a helmet.” He grabbed one and tossed it over to me, before going over and messing with something on the back of the bike.
“Okay, let’s go over the rules.”
I snorted with sudden laughter before slapping my hand against my mouth. “I didn’t think bikers had rules,” He glared down at me. “Sorry. Continue.”
He pointed back to the bike. “See these? These are footpegs. Keep your feet on them at all times. Always get on from the left side—just throw your right leg over and then slide up into the seat. Your hands should be on my hips,” I sucked in a breath and his eyes narrowed. “Somethin’ wrong with that?”
I shook my head. “No, I just thought there were handlebars or something.”
It was Charm’s turn to laugh. “There are—for me. Motorcycles turn by leaning, so lean the same direction I do. The best way to do that is to look over my shoulder in the same direction as the turn—your body should always be in line with mine.”
My mind went haywire during the last part. He wasn’t smiling though, so a ‘that’s what she said’ joke would’ve probably been in poor taste. Probably.
C’mon, Neve.
Think of mangy dogs and elementary school signage.
“Anything else?” I choked out.
He nodded. “Yeah. If I brake suddenly, use the footpegs to keep from sliding into me. And if you see animals, tap me on the shoulder. If they’re on the right side of the road, right shoulder. Left side of the road, left shoulder. It ain’t rocket science. Oh, and don’t get any bright ideas about leaping off the damn thing and we’ll be golden.”
I looked back at the bike. What seemed like a thing of beauty a minute ago, now seemed like a steel deathtrap. In my dream, I hadn’t had to worry about wildlife or leaning the right way, I just held on and enjoyed the ride. “I really have a lot to get done today. Maybe another time.”
I attempted to hand him the helmet, but he kept his hands at his side. “You scared, Sweetheart?”
I laughed weakly. “I’m thinking I’d be better off with the coke. That’s all.”
His mood darkened instantly. “You can wait and learn with Gunner or you can go with me now. It’s your choice, but one way or another, your ass will be on the back of a bike.”
“Great.” I slipped the helmet on, while cursing him under my breath. He grabbed the chin strap and tightened it. Knowing he wouldn’t see, I stuck my tongue out at him from beneath the visor.
My maturity level was on par with that of a kindergartner right now.
“Let’s go.” He climbed on and started the bike up and I kept my left foot on the ground, while extending my right leg over the seat, doing exactly what he’d shown me. He turned toward me. “Hold on tight. If you get scared or want me to stop, hit me. Don’t do something stupid that’ll get us both killed though.”
I nodded and reluctantly gripped his hips as the bike moved forward. I would’ve been lying if I said that my muscles weren’t taut with fear those first few minutes. The roads up here weren’t straight. They were winding, meaning that there was a lot of leaning involved. I kept a death grip on Charm until my body got used to the movements. It was a little like riding a roller coaster and I began to feel giddy.
I stopped focusing on the flaming skull on the back of Charm’s vest long enough to appreciate our surrounding and my hands relaxed slightly as he expertly navigated the twists and turns, the wind whipping through his hair.
Gradually, I became aware of the vibrations from the bike and those pesky feelings of lust fought their way to the surface again.
Nope.
Not going there.
I’d seen the picture in his room. I’d read their life story. As much as I wanted to believe that he’d had his own version of unrequited love with her, it was obvious that they’d worked things out by the time she got sick. She’d been pregnant, for crying out loud.
Charm was crazy about her.
What kind of person would ruin that?
I might have been a lot of things, but a homewrecker was not one of them.
Not me.
I just had to reign in my feelings and focus on the task at hand–which was friendship.
Period.
End of story.
Anything else was madness.
Charm
I’d been colorblind my entire life and then she came along—like a fucking rainbow, saturating everything around her.
I’d fallen in love.
Sure, I’d fought against feeling anything toward her, but I think I’ve known from day one that she’s different. This is more than just wanting to sink my dick into her; although that’s also at the top of my list. I want to be the one to make her face light up in pleasure and feel her body clench around me as her nails dig into my skin.
Watching her has become something of a hobby for me. I like catching her unaware—like when she’s curled up in one of the chairs on the porch, that big ass science textbook lying open on her lap. I can see her from the window in my office and it’s different. When she has no idea that she’s being watched, the worried look in her eyes is gone and her body is relaxed. She pores over each page with a slight frown on her face, pausing every so often to brush the hair back off of her forehead and every day that I’ve seen her do it, I’ve fallen a little more.
I’d understood maybe a fraction of what I’d read, yet she devours the books the way most women do Nicholas Spark’s movies.
How had she ended up here?
How had someone as fucking smart as she was ended up hooked on blow?
I’d lost count of the number of fantasies I’d had and I wondered what she’d do if I made my presence known. If I went out and asked her what it was that made her lips turn up in a small smile, would she see how much I wanted her? If I took the book from her hand and backed her up against the wall, would she feel what I’m feeling?
She’d probably just apologize for enjoying herself.
I was back to being a kid, watching the club whores with Luck’s bikers. I’d sneak around, wondering what it would be like to be with a woman, while trying to decode their mystery.
The trouble was that I’d never been with any woman the way I wanted to be with her.
I kept my distance though; afraid to push her into something she might not be ready for. It had become my mission to find the person responsible for the bruises on her neck. I wanted to see the look on the guy’s face as he died by my hand for the brutality that she’d suffered at his.
I’d convinced myself that I could look without touching, but when she had a night terror it changed everything.
I heard her screams from all the way downstairs. Sleep never came easily for me; not for some time now. When she cried out, I was up the stairs in seconds, gun in hand.
She thrashed around under the blankets, fighting demons I knew nothing about, but it was obvious that she was under the grip of some heavy shit. Her dark hair tangled in the sheets as she struggled and, without another thought, I slid into bed and pulled her to my chest.
My body reacted immediately.
I wanted to fuck her until the nightmares were forced to the back of her mind and all she could see was me.
It was so fucking wrong, yet nothing had ever felt more right.
I stroked her cheek with the back of my thumb, enjoying the softness without apology. When she came to and began babbling, I realized that it hadn’t been just some nightmare. She’d lived through it.
I crushed her up against my chest, deciding then and there that I wasn’t going to fight it anymore. I wasn’t going to force myself to stay away. Her demons and mine were the same; perhaps they were even close friends in another realm.
I want her on the back of my bike.
The only woman who ever rode with me was Rae, but it’s time. I feel it and I hope she does too.
Neve has fought for life in ways that Rae never wanted to and I can’t keep comparing the two. I’ve got to let one of them go.
I’m going to take her to the cliffs and then I’ll tell her everything.
Chapter Fifteen
“Where are we?” I slid off the bike. Charm had taken so many turns that I’d become disoriented and doubted that I could’ve found my way back to the lodge even if he paid me.
We were surrounded by trees in every direction and had gone off the main road a few miles back, ending up in the middle of the wilderness.
He put the kickstand down and grinned. “You’ll see. C’mon.” He walked off the narrow road and disappeared into the trees.
I set my helmet on the bike and reluctantly followed him in. There was a small path that wasn’t visible from the road and we walked along in silence until we reached a clearing with a lake surrounded by stone. It was nature’s version of an in-ground pool. The sunlight made the surface shimmer and Charm turned around to study my reaction.
“Oh my god, it’s beautiful. I’ve never seen a lake like this before.”
His lip turned up in a small smile, but he remained silent.
I didn’t do well with silence, so I talked to fill the space. “I was thinking, maybe I could start doing the shopping—that is, if it’s okay with you. I’d kind of like to get myself some clothes too—not that I don’t appreciate what I’ve got. No, I just thought—”
“You ramble when you’re nervous, you know that?” His face was unreadable as he continued, without waiting for a response. “Who was in the fire, Neve?”
I looked away and whispered, “Pass,” but he hooked a finger under my chin and brought my face up to meet his. I didn’t want to talk about it, but seeing as to how I already knew most of his secrets, it was only fair to give him one of mine.
I swallowed, feeling as if I was choking as I replied, “My parents.”
His eyes searched my face and, for a split second, I could’ve sworn I saw sadness in them. “It wasn’t just a dream, was it?”
I blinked at the sudden tears that formed and shook my head. “No…it wasn’t.”
Charm nodded, as if he’d known the answer all along. “You blame yourself—why?”
“Because I got out and they didn’t!” I blurted and then immediately covered my mouth. I hadn’t ever spoken the words aloud. I’d spent the last year with a dull ache in my chest and guilt that never lessened.
The fire had been my fault.
“Miss, can you hear me?” The man asked, as he knelt beside me.
Light flickered at the corner of my eye and I turned to see my childhood home engulfed in flames. They’d gotten out—surely they’d made it out. Paramedics yelled over me and I wanted to tell them to go back inside and make sure my parents were safe.
It was nothing more than a little smoke inhalation.
An oxygen mask was strapped to my face as I struggled to sit up. The yellow man pushed me back down and this time, I didn’t fight him. I only caught a quick glance, but it was enough to keep me from moving. The skin on my thighs was blackened and curled up, revealing the muscle underneath.
I felt nothing.
“You ever been cliff jumping?”
I shook my head and frowned at him as I came back to the present.
What the hell was he talking about?
One minute, he was asking me about my dead parents. The next, cliff jumping. I was going to get whiplash just from his conversation skills.
He pointed toward a grouping of rocks on the other side of the lake. “Roaring Springs River feeds into this—it’s actually a rock bowl, not a lake. And back over there, is a small trail leading up to the cliff.”
I continued to stare blankly at him until he grew frustrated and began shouting while pointing. “Cliff jumping, Neve. You and me, we could climb up and jump off—it’s about a twenty foot drop and the water is frigid, but it could be fun.”
I held up my hand. “You want me to jump off a perfectly good cliff and into freezing water?”
He nodded earnestly. “Yeah.”
I frowned again. “But I don’t have a swimsuit.”
Or a last will and testament typed up and ready.
He grinned and began walking toward the hiking trail. I called out after him, “I wasn’t agreeing!”
He continued and I had to run to keep up, which then made me realize how out of shape I was. The trail began to inch upwards and I could see the river on the other side of the cliff. The rapids swirled violently and I resisted the urge to cling to the back of Charm’s cut-off.
One misstep and I’d be at the mercy of unforgiving waters. I shivered and looked away. When we reached the top, Charm stripped off his vest and shirt. Dark ink connected in swirls across his muscular body—obliviating everything around us, and leaving me gasping for breath as if I’d already gone under.
“Um, is that necessary?” I squeaked out.
His head cocked to the side. “You wanna ride home in wet clothes?”
I shook my head slowly. “I sort of thought I’d just stay up here and watch you do it. I wasn’t planning on getting in though.”
He laughed, showing nearly all of his teeth. “Oh, Sweetheart. You’re going in.”
Most men could say sweetheart in a complimentary way; with Charm, there was always this condescending undertone.
I shook my head vehemently and took a tentative step backward.
He moved toward me. “How about this? You jump and I let you start doing the shopping on your own. That would include a budget for new clothes.”
I almost agreed, until I remembered the reaction I’d gotten before when the other bikers had seen my thighs. “I—I can’t.”
His gaze dropped down and I cringed. One of the guys must’ve already told him. “How about this? I go first and then you. I’ll come back up and get your clothes right after and you can stay in the water.”
He unfastened his jeans and then stopped, clearly waiting for me to answer. I forced my gaze away from his hands. “Okay. You have to go first though.”
Charm nodded and took off his boots and socks before sliding the jeans down his hips. He kicked them into a small pile and then grinned wickedly at me. I was just contemplating what his reaction would be if I threw caution to the wind and fell into his arms as he stepped to the edge and jumped off.
Holy hell.
He didn’t even give me a warning. I was lost in thoughts of him being an underwear model in another life and then he was gone. I stepped over to the edge and he waved up at me. “Your turn, Sweetheart!”
I turned away and raised my middle finger in the air, resisting the urge to scream in frustration. I’d made the mistake of looking down…all the way down.
That was only twenty feet?
With shaking hands, I pulled Charm’s jacket and my Juicy t-shirt off and then reluctantly removed the rest. Here I was—standing in my underwear on the edge of a cliff during the last week of August.
I stepped to the edge and took a deep breath. I could do this.
“Neve! I’m freezing my ass off down here! Hurry up!”
One.
Two.
Three.
I prayed that I didn’t land on Charm or any sharp rocks and stepped off. My stomach jumped into my chest, giving me the same sensation I’d had on the bike of being on a roller coaster. It was terrifying, but as icy water flooded my nose and jolted my system, I suddenly wanted very much to do it again.
As I pushed my body up to the surface, coughing and spluttering, I realized that I’d experienced the same feelings as when I was high.
I’d felt something while sober that I would’ve thought impossible.
Happiness.
“I did it,” I breathed.
“You damn sure did, honey.” I opened my eyes to see that Charm had not gotten out to go get our clothes, as he’d promise
d, but was instead swimming closer to me, a big smile plastered across his face.
Five.
I’d made him smile five times now.
My teeth chattered from the water and I kicked my feet to try and warm myself up. “I’m dying of hypothermia over here. Weren’t you going to get our clothes?”
Please don’t come any closer.
I wasn’t capable of fighting my feelings anymore. Not when he looked at me like that.
Charm grinned as he moved ever closer. “You’re shivering. That’s a good indicator that you’re not hypothermic.”
My mouth dropped open. “How did you know that?”
He reached out and pulled me closer to him, rubbing my arms to get the blood flowing. “I’ve been doing some reading lately—you know, science stuff.”
I bobbed my head and murmured, “Science stuff.”
Something softened in Charm’s expression as he watched me piece it together and I suddenly felt hot in spite of the frigid water.
His hand came up and cupped my cheek and then his mouth was on mine. It didn’t matter how many times I’d imagined it; nothing lived up to the reality of him kissing me. It was like jumping off of that cliff all over again. He kissed like he wrote—with a fiery passion that I’d never experienced before or ever would again in my lifetime.
My lips parted as his tongue pushed its way past my lips, taking anything and everything I had to offer while his hand held my head immobile. The stubble on his face was abrasive, but I was lost in the moment, too far gone to care. He reluctantly pulled back and my numb fingertips trailed across his pecs, as he lightly kissed a trail down the curve of my neck.
I forgot about the cold and guided his mouth back up to mine, wrapping my arms around his neck as I pulled him closer. My legs locked around his waist and my hips rolled forward, seeking. His hands explored my body before connecting with my ass. With a low growl against my lips, he dug in, crushing me up against what I’d sought only moments before.
I could’ve stayed like that for an eternity, but then I thought of the girl from the notebook and the heat that had flooded my body was replaced with guilt.
Through The Woods Page 13
