by Thomas, C. M
“What do you say to pizza for dinner? Maybe your dad knows a good pizza place in town?”
“Pizza, me want pizza.” Alana smiled and crawled down from my lap. She ran around in the living room singing about pizza to her dolly.
“She didn’t inherit my family’s talent for singing, I hear.” Liam laughed.
“No, she didn’t. That’s all me, unfortunately.” I laughed with him. We both looked at our little girl running around happily. Liam shifted in the couch and pulled me in for a hug.
“I’m so sorry I didn’t look more for you,” he whispered right in my ear. I leaned back so I could look him in the eyes.
“You would never have found me. Don’t be sorry for something you didn’t have anything to do with, okay?”
“We did pretty good, didn’t we?” He looked over at Alana again.
“We really did. She is the best. Loving and caring. But sometimes she can be a little diva, just so you know.”
“Really? How can that be? Her mom is not that at all.” He looked like he was trying his best not to laugh.
“Shut up.” I slapped him on the chest before I stood up. “Do you mind ordering some pizza? I don’t know what’s good here anymore. I will pay.”
“I will order some. And no way in hell that you will pay, Sunshine,” he said before he took his phone out and made a call. I looked at him. Did he just call me Sunshine? That was what he used to call me. I could feel my heart beat just a little faster because of that.
“Dinner will be here in thirty minutes. Zane will come with it. He won’t come in, okay?” Liam came over and stood in front of me.
“Okay. But he has to meet her at some point.”
“I know. But today I want her for myself.”
“I like that.” We walked over to Alana and sat down on the floor with her. She was playing with her dolly and telling us stories. Thirty minutes later, Liam got a text and walked out to get the pizza.
“Pizza is here,” he said when he walked into the kitchen and set the boxes on the table.
“Pizza, Pizza.” Alana ran into the kitchen and stood beside her chair, waiting for one of us to lift her up. Liam was faster than me and lifted her up on her chair. She could crawl up on the chair herself, but she liked to be lifted up instead.
I found some plates and something for us to drink. Soon, we all sat at the table and enjoyed our very first dinner together. Hopefully it wouldn’t be the last one.
After dinner, Alana got her bath before she had to sleep. Liam mostly stood by and just observed. I knew it must be hard for him, not knowing what to do. But he would learn. I knew he would.
When Alana was ready for bed, she ran over to Liam and looked up at him. “Daddy, me bed.” She held her arms up, implying that she wanted him to lift her onto her bed. He lifted her up, and we walked together into her room.
I looked around the room. I really needed to do some decorating at some point. I looked at Liam. I could see in his eyes he had questions, and that was okay. I would answer them all after Alana was tucked into bed.
“Here you go, baby girl. Sleep tight. Love you.” Liam tucked her in with her dolly and gave her a small kiss on the forehead. Hearing him say “love you” to her was the best feeling in the world. The fact that he was bonding with her right away made me smile.
Liam walked away from the bed so I had a chance to say good night to our daughter.
“See you tomorrow, baby girl. Mommy loves you.” I gave her a kiss before I turned on the iPod docking station. She couldn’t sleep without music. I couldn’t help but look at Liam when I turned on the music. The surprise in his face was priceless when he heard that the music our daughter slept to was none other than Deep C.
I mean, what else would she be listening to? Her dad and uncles were a famous rock band. Some might say more of a rock boy band. But still. It was not the normal boy band music. The music was more rock than other boy bands. I guessed that was why they called it a rock band, and not boy band.
We walked out of her room, and I turned off the lights. We walked into the living room and sat on the couch.
“Amy was right, our girl is a fan.” Liam grinned.
“She sure is. She loves your music. I do too, by the way.” I blushed a little and smiled at him. I’d always loved their music. And the fact that I’d been on the sidelines from the beginning just made me so proud. I still couldn’t believe the success they had. That the dreams they had when we were just kids actually came through.
“I know you do. But I’m surprised she likes it. Amy told me about her reaction upon seeing us on MTV this morning. I just thought she was joking.”
“Guess not.” I smiled. “So, how has it been today?”
“Weird. Wonderful. Surprising. I don’t know how to describe today. But our girl is something else. That little girl is full of life. Thanks for letting me come over tonight.” He reached over and took my hand in his.
“You’re welcome. I wanted you two to meet. I’m just happy that she didn’t seem to notice how emotional it was for both of us.”
“Me too. I don’t think I’ve been this emotional ever. Seeing her for the first time, and to have her come running to me like that was amazing.” I couldn’t help but close my eyes. I knew our love was not the same, but I still had that as one of my biggest emotional roller coasters.
As if he could read my mind, Liam said, “Our love was different, Sunshine. It was also full of emotions, okay? This with Alana, I don’t know how to describe it. She’s my baby. She’s a product of our love. I think that’s why my emotions and feelings are all over the place.” He pulled me close, so we sat side by side.
I rested my head on his shoulder. “I know. I’m just being silly. I can’t stop thinking about how things could have been like if my parents hadn’t sent me away.” I could feel the tears in my eyes again.
“I know. We can’t change the past, but we can decide how to move forward and how the future should be like. I want to be a part of her life, Sunshine, yours too.” He gave me a small kiss on the top of my head.
“I want that too. I know that if we are going to be more than just friends, we have a long way to go. But I want that. I really do. I want the three of us to be a family.” This was my fear. That he wouldn’t want that. That he wanted us to be just friends. I just prayed that I wasn’t the only one who wanted it.
“I want that too. But it will take some time, okay?”
“I know. And that’s okay. Did you tell your family?”
“I did. My parents are so happy to be grandparents. I don’t know about her uncles; I think we might need to keep an eye out for them.” He chuckled when I looked up at him.
“I can imagine. But are they angry with me?” I looked down at the floor when I asked him that. I didn’t want them to be angry with me, but at the same time I understood if they were. I still felt guilty about everything that happened.
“Hey. Look at me.” He put his hands on my cheeks and made me look at him. “It was not your fault, okay? And I think they all understood that. Caleb might not, but you know him. He can be a bit hard-headed. He will come around. But the rest of them understood, okay?”
“Okay.” I closed my eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. This was one of the things I was worried about. That Liam would understand, but his family not so much. I knew that he had been through a heartbreak, just like me, and they had been helping him to get through that.
“My dad actually asked if you wanted to come to dinner tomorrow. Both of you. They want to meet their grandchild.”
“I’d like that. But do you think she will be ready for that? I mean, she has already met so many new people these last couple of days.”
“I know. But I think it’s the two of us who have the most fear. Just look at how she was with Amy earlier today. But if you want to wait, I understand that. And they
will too.”
“No, I don’t want to wait. You’re right, it’s our fears. She loves meeting new people. And this is her family. But maybe we can show her a picture of them first. Tell her who they are?”
“Sounds like a plan. You guys can come over to my house after her afternoon nap, then we can all look at some pictures. What do you say about that?”
“I think that is a good idea.”
Chapter 8 :
Liam
I looked down at Evie. She was resting her head against my chest. I thought she had gotten even more beautiful over the years. Might also have something to do with the fact that she gave birth to our perfect daughter, Alana. Meeting her today was amazing. And I fell in love with her right away. The love I felt for her was so deep, and it was like it had just been hiding inside me, waiting to come out.
“We kind of need to talk about something else. The paparazzi.” I held a breath and waited for Evie to take the words in. I knew she was not used to being followed around. But she would be the moment the press found out about her and Alana. I knew Evie would be fine, but Alana—I didn’t want her to get hurt by the fact that I was famous. It had to be me and Evie together, finding a solution we both could live with.
“I know. I’ve been thinking a lot about it. What do you think? I don’t want Alana to get hurt, I want her to have a normal childhood. I know that we can’t avoid the press forever. But can we maybe just wait a little?” Evie said while she looked at me.
“I have a meeting tomorrow with the band and our PA. I think we are going to tell our manager about it. But I think you’re right about waiting. I want some time with her before we can’t go anywhere without security. Our head of security, Dax, will also have to know. I think it’s best if we get extra guys out here just in case.”
“Okay. I don’t really know much about it. But will these people keep the information to themselves?” I knew she was nervous about all of this. I could see it in her eyes, and she was shaking just a little. And I got that. But I trusted both our manager and Dax. And Anna was family, but Evie didn’t know that.
“They will. I trust them, okay?” She nodded. “And our PA, Anna, is actually family. She is Zane’s girlfriend.”
“She is what?” Evie almost jumped up from the couch in surprise.
“You heard me. She is Zane’s girlfriend.” I couldn’t help but laugh. She had known Zane forever, and knew like the rest of us how big a surprise this was. I still couldn’t believe that he was settling down. But Anna was a great girl, and she didn’t take all his crap. Which was why I thought they were the perfect couple.
“Wow. Just wow.” She was speechless. But then she started laughing. “How the hell did that happen?”
I told her the story about Anna. About her stalker and everything. Anna joined us on tour a little over two months ago; she was running from a stalker. At the time, her sister, Kylie, was working for us as our PA. I think the moment Zane saw Anna, he wanted her. They were perfect for each other.
Anna’s stalker found her and kidnapped her, but our security detail found her before her stalker could her hurt her too much. He did hurt her, but he didn’t get a chance to rape her.
I looked at Evie. I didn’t want to keep anything from her. And I knew she wouldn’t tell anyone.
“She is safe now?” Evie asked.
“She is. He is in jail. But seeing her and Zane go through that was hard.”
“I can imagine that. I can’t wait to meet her. She must be a special girl. Zane never looked at a girl twice.”
“I know. We have teased him a lot about that. But he’s changed. He loves her. You will see that. Just look at him when Anna is around. He can’t hide his love for her.”
“You think Cole and Caleb are next?”
“I don’t know. We both know that something happened between Amy and Cole. I don’t know what. But maybe. Caleb? I don’t think he has any plans of finding love. He loves his single life too much.”
“But so did Zane, right? And for Cole and Amy. I think she had a crush on him when we were in high school. But I don’t think he knew that.”
“Me neither.” But I didn’t think it was just in high school. I saw how Amy looked at Cole. But it was their life. I didn’t want to be in the middle of that.
We talked for another hour or so, just catching up. It felt so normal sitting here talking to her. I wanted this all the time. I knew I couldn’t push her too much, but I wanted her and Alana in my house. Sooner rather than later.
“I think I will drive home, is that okay?” I asked her. We were still sitting on the couch and had been catching up with each other’s lives for the past hours.
“Sure. Are you coming over in the morning?”
“I have a meeting tomorrow morning. So why don’t you and Alana just come over in the afternoon, when you are ready?”
“We can do that. Do you want me to text you before we come?”
“No need. I will be at my house all day. We will have the meeting there. And then I might do some songwriting.” We needed some new material for the new album. We should start recording around Christmas. And I just thought I got some new things to write about.
“We will come over after her nap, then.”
I got up from the couch and walked over to the door. Evie followed behind me.
“By the way, what about Bear?”
“What about him?” she asked. “Oh, you mean about Alana? She loves animals.”
“I could make Zane take him back to my parents’ house. Even though Bear would be mad about that.” I grinned. Bear lived in my house whenever I was home.
“Don’t do that. She has to get used to him.”
“You’re right. See you tomorrow, Sunshine.” And before I knew it, I kissed her. Just like nothing had happened. And wow, I missed kissing her. The moment our lips connected, it was like the world around us faded. The kiss was slow, soft, and just like being back home safe. The touch of her lips against mine was home. My sanctuary; she was it, she was and always would be the love of my life. I had to figure out how to make this work between us. I needed her in my life like I needed my next breath.
“See you tomorrow,” she said when I pulled back. Her cheeks were pink; I loved when she blushed like that. I walked out of the house before I did something stupid.
Kissing her was stupid, but now that I’d kissed her, I didn’t want to stop. But we were not ready for that yet. We would be soon. If I had anything to say about it, both my girls would be with me at my house soon. We had wasted enough time away from each other.
When I got home, I took a beer from the fridge and sat on one of my big chairs. I decided to call my mom, to tell her that she would meet her grandchild tomorrow.
“Hi, baby boy. How did it go tonight?”
“Hi, Mom. It was amazing. She just came running to me and jumped right in my arms. I’ve never felt anything like that before. Having my baby girl in my arms.” I couldn’t help but smile when I told her about my first meeting with Alana.
“Oh, honey. I’m so happy for you. What about Evie, is she okay?”
“I think she is. She has so much guilt built up inside her. I tried to tell her it wasn’t her fault. But I don’t think she agrees with that.”
“Poor girl. But we will all be here for her. And with time, she will understand that none of this is her fault. She came back. She could have run in the opposite direction the minute she left that awful place. But she didn’t.”
“I know. Evie and I talked. And if the offer still stands, we would like for you all to meet Alana tomorrow over dinner.”
“Are you sure? We can wait. Or no, we can’t. But we will.”
“We’re sure. We talked about it and agreed that she needs to meet the rest of her family. You will love her, Mom.”
“Of course we will. She is our granddaughter. I will
get the family together for dinner. What time do you think?”
“About five? Alana normally gets tucked in around seven thirty at night. But Evie and Alana are coming over to me before we come to your house. We might come before.”
“You come when you’re ready. I will tell your siblings to be here around four. Then they will be here when you guys come. Do you want dad to get Bear?”
“No. Evie thinks Alana will love him. He can stay here.”
“I’m sure she will. Oh, I can’t wait to meet her.”
“I know. I can’t wait for her to meet you either. See you tomorrow. Good night.”
“Good night.”
I hung up and saw that Anna had sent a text while I was talking to my mom. The meeting was set for ten tomorrow morning. I guessed Zane wanted to sleep in. But that’s fine. Then I got a chance to run in the morning. It had been so long since I actually ran outside. It was always in the gym, and it was not the same thing. I sent a quick text to Gia.
Me: Hey, you still run in the mornings?
She had always been a runner. Gia, Zane, and me. But I thought it would be nice for just her and me to run. She had always been closest to Zane. Just like me and Amy always had been close. I knew that Amy and I were twins, but we had a very close bond. Always had, and I knew that we always would have that. And I think we would even if we weren’t twins.
Gia: Of course. You want to come?
Me: Yes, if you don’t mind?
Gia: I don’t. I will be at your house around seven, is that okay?
Me: Of course. See you in the morning. Good night.
Gia: Night.
The next morning, I got up and got ready for my run with Gia. Bear looked up from his blanket like I was crazy.
“Come on, boy, you can’t sleep all day.” I walked out of the house and waited for him to follow. He came strolling out of the house, like he had all the time in the world. But when he saw Gia come running down the driveway, he was ready. I know both he and Buddy usually ran with her. But Buddy was at Zane’s, and there was no chance he was up this early if he didn’t have to be.
