Jen later sent another email with a link to view the revised FAQ episode. She said they had addressed Jon and Kate’s notes, and Wendy’s notes, but they should let her know by the next morning if they wanted anything else removed or revised.
In an email from September 25, 2008, Kate asked if her words “I don’t want this in (the episode)” could be removed from a conversation between her and Jon without removing the rest of the conversation, which she liked. She said she wanted to make the episode “friendlier” so they wouldn’t “get shot again.”
Jen emailed Kate to thank her for her quick notes and to let her know that it was “no problem” for them to edit that out.
SCHEDULING REAL LIFE
The Gosselin’s lives were very heavily scheduled. From the sound of things, it doesn’t look like too much of real life was “just happening” on its own.
In June of 2008, Kate was becoming increasingly agitated about scheduling issues. When the issues over scheduling and operations came to a boiling point for Kate, Jen Stocks bore the brunt of Kate’s wrath. A series of emails between Kate and Jen highlight the tensions.
In one of those emails, Kate gave Jen the following instructions:
Reschedule the yard sale.
Email a detailed plan to her for the week by the next day.
Provide them (Jon and Kate) with plans by three days before the next week’s shoot. (Kate said, “The “disorganization is not working well.”)
Let them know what was wanted from them on each day, then Kate would “pick the time slots that work best for us.”
Verify whether the beach house was officially reserved, but “... NOT in our names” and let Kate know the exact dates it was reserved for.
Schedule a meeting with “production, Wendy, Steve and Julie to iron out the continuing oversights, lack of organization etc.” (Kate said there were major issues every week and “Jon and I are MORE than frustrated!!!!! We are hoping everyone involved sees the importance of such a meeting.... We can’t go on like this!”)
Work out a plan that suited them all, kept them safe, and worked for them and not against them.
On June 16, 2008, at 8:30 AM, Jen Stocks replied to Kate to let her know the schedule for the week. I guess Kate needed advance notice of what she was going to be doing in her real life for the next week as well. Jen told Kate that she had tried “many times last week to get the plans for this week confirmed with you, and I am still waiting on you to tell me if we can do interviews on Friday. I emailed you this week’s schedule, as it existed last week, on Thursday. And that is when you decided that you wanted to make changes.”
Jen sounded perplexed when she wrote that she wasn’t sure “when we have ever done anything at a time that did not suit you.” She reminded Kate that “you are the one who always chooses the times, we work around your schedule, always.” Jen then started talking about work and assured Kate that the beach house had been booked “under Deanie’s name from June 29th-July 13th.” She then listed a very detailed schedule for the week which included the family’s activity, day and time.
Even with Jen spelling out each day’s activities, Kate was still aggravated with the disorganization of her real life schedule. She took exception to Jen telling her that she had tried to get Kate’s input when Kate was in NYC. Kate said, “Unfortunately, I could never be expected to confirm a schedule while in NYC (without my calendar) with my 8 kids, doing three appearances and two additional shoots for the show, one of which was a disorganized mess!” Kate told Jen that she had to wait until she got home to think it through, but her point was that they should not be waiting until days before that week.
Kate also told Jen that they should be “finalizing the schedule for TWO weeks from now.... Not this weeks schedule.” She said “Trust me, the results will be better!!! I dont work well last minute!” Kate then let Jen know that they would leave for the Thomas the Train visit at 9:30, and that she wasn’t sure which other activities they would be doing because it depended on “crowds, moods etc.” Kate said she would know when they got there and saw the setup.
Given all the tension, Jen was ready to walk out. On June 17, 2008, Kate sent Jen a “heart-to-heart” email to explain herself and to apologize. Kate said she knew Jen was hurt and wanted to let Jen know that, despite being very frustrated with operations, it was nothing personal. Kate told Jen, “You are the ‘front line’ person and you receive the brunt of the explosion” even though “most times” the problem is “something that is not your direct doing.” Kate then uttered words rarely heard from her. She said: “For handing you those explosions of frustration, I am sorry! For any rude/unacceptable comments or behaviour I am sorry as well.”
Kate went on to explain to Jen what a tough position they were in because they have eight children who “in a million years” they could “never spend the amount of time with each that we want.” She talked about how well the show was doing in the ratings and how, with that and all their other commitments, they had “TONS to do and no time to complete it all.” Kate also mentioned security issues that were escalating daily, and how everything was causing her and Jon to be very stressed out, overworked and short-fused. She said, “It is more of a daily thing to be stressed out beyond belief as the pressure cooker continues to cook.” Kate then spelled out to Jen things she would appreciate:
Having a schedule a full week or more in advance.
Organization (location, addresses, who they were going to meet with and at what time, etc.).
Having a say about WHO came to their house as part of the crew.
A crew without opinions.
Respect for their privacy and property.
Crew members who were informed about recent security issues and would watch out for them.
Crew members who would respect their home (i.e., always putting things in the exact locations requested; cleaning up equipment, trash, and toys that were moved for interviews).
A crew that would consider ALL that they were doing (marketing/media shoots, speaking engagements) and understood when they were frazzled.
Kate also told Jen “honestly, if you aren’t here producing in our house, I don’t want to do this anymore.” She pleaded with Jen to stay on, saying “you have been here with us since the beginning, our kids know and love you and we want YOU to continue to do this job!” Kate then suggested that Jen go ahead and take a break, but then come back to them because no one could replace her .... “Honestly.”
The next day, Jen sent Kate an email thanking her for the apology and kind words, saying she really appreciated it. Kate forwarded Jen’s response to Wendy Douglas of Discovery, thanking Wendy for her “honesty in alerting us to a problem…” The logical assumption is that Jen must have told Wendy about the problems she was having with Kate.
After Jen thanked Kate, she immediately switched back to work mode, talking about getting a schedule made up for the next week and shooting the family’s preparation and packing for their beach trip. She asked Kate if they could squeeze in one interview, but said she knew they had music video stuff to get done so it might not work out. Jen signed off by saying she would talk to Kate soon.
In reviewing the content of these emails, and the escalating tension, one exceptionally disturbing fact stands out above the rest. It is the fact that the entire family was under a tremendous amount of stress. Reading Kate’s words about the “pressure cooker” they were in, and “explosions of frustration,” it would be ridiculous for anyone to try to argue that the kids weren’t feeling a significant amount of stress as well. They were required to participate in all the filming, and in marketing and interviews and photo shoots. Also, Jon and Kate would not have been able to hide all the tension they were feeling from the children, so the children would have felt that as well.
The schedules sound like they were exhausting. It is hard to imagine adults handling such pressures well, much less thinking that kids would be able to handle the relentless filming an
d instructions and direction, and all the extras they had to participate in.
And for someone who raved in interviews about the wonderful crew being like family members, Kate certainly had a lot of complaints about them in that list of things she told Jen she would appreciate.
Kate’s words to Jen, above all else, expose the reality of filming a reality TV show. They reveal the toll such filming takes on a family, and should be taken as a warning to all those who would agree to open their life to the world in such a way. If TLC were, in fact, filming a family just running around doing their normal, everyday business, as Kate has always argued, there would never have been such high and such constant levels of stress.
As a final point, Jen Stocks ultimately did leave the show and was replaced by another producer. But the show continued merrily along. Kate must have forgotten that she didn’t want to “do this” anymore if Jen wasn’t producing their show.
EPISODES OF LIFE
Kate was being a big helper by providing ideas for episodes, while also working in as many new freebies as possible at the same time. In an email to “all”, Kate said she would love to add the trainer episode where she would be doing weight training, but that would have to be filmed at the end of the month because she couldn’t weight train following surgery until April 30th. Other ideas she suggested were building a dog house, which would go with the wireless fence training; showing the passport process for the kids (with applications and photos); updating the Sam’s club or grocery store visit where the “(kids scramble to help put stuff away-- SO cute!)”; installation of the crooked houses; the birthday party for the “little kids”; mothers day; and the southern leg of her book tour which was beginning in North Carolina. Kate said it would be great if they could get those items scheduled in April around her “ridiculously busy schedule”.
Kate also made suggestions about what to do for “the little kids birthday party”. She said that the kids wanted a bouncy house party and they could do that at a park and “invite preschool friends who are willing to sign NDAs and agree to be on camera ONLY.” She said: “We can forbid all cameras at the party and make area secure according to Steve who obviously would orchestrate all security.” Kate also noted that the party should be held as close to May 10th as possible.
On April 3, 2009, at 8:13 AM, Jeff, the series producer, wrote to Julie May about scheduling some more episodes of the Gosselin family’s life:
April 9 - Cabinets
April 22 - Invisible Fence training
On Monday, May 25, 2009, Wendy Douglas sent Jon and Kate the following schedule for their real and unscripted life for the week:
Tuesday - arrive Gosselin Home @ 9:30 AM
1. Shoot Beach + Cabinet Set-up + Slice of Life 9:30 -11:00
2. Status of Cabinets/kitchen will no cabinets - Jon/Kate 11:00-11:30
3. American Chopper Interviews 1:00 - 2:00
4. Kate packing for beach 3:00 -4:00
Wednesday - arrive Gosselin House @ 8:00 AM - 5:00PM
1. Merilatt crew begins install - Jon
Wednesday - Kate & Kids @ Beach - 8:00 AM - 6:00 PM
1. Arriving to house
2. Beach
3. Dinner
Thursday - arrive @ Gosselin House - 8:00 AM
1. B-roll/status of cabinets - NO JON
Thursday - Kate & Kids @ Beach - 8:00 AM - 6:00 PM
1. Slice of Life beach
Friday - arrive @ Gosselin House @ 1:00 PM - 5:00 PM
1. Jon checking in on cabinet construction
PLAY CHEESE FOR THE CAMERAS, KIDS
In September 2008, Wendy Douglas sent an email to Jon and Kate and the series producers to provide them with information about working some paid product placement from Hasbro into the show. She explained that Hasbro toys had to be integrated into two separate episodes. The toys were the Tonka Bounce Back Racers (8 of them) and the Dreamtown Cherry Blossom Market (2 of them). The market included the following accessories that are sold separately to the mediocre: the Cherry Blossom Produce Stand, the Scoop & Smile Set, and the Fruit & Cheese Plate.
Wendy said the goal was to see the sextuplets “playing with the games naturally” and to make it look “as organic as possible.” She suggested that they shoot the Bounce Back Racers the next morning because “they are smaller and easier to get out”, and then shoot the Cherry Blossom Market episode on Saturday October 4th because the market needed some assembly.
Wendy then told producers Jen and Jeff that Kate said it would be okay for a production assistant or someone to arrive earlier than 8 AM the next day so they could take out the racers and set them up for the kids. She also instructed Jen and Jeff to have someone get batteries for the remote controls ahead of time. Doesn’t everyone in real life have people come to their home to set up toys for their children to play with and to make sure there are plenty of batteries?
It should come as no surprise by now that Wendy wanted the sextuplets to look fake natural while they were fake playing with their free toys.
MEDIA TRAINING
Kate was freaked out after word got out that there was trouble in the Gosselin marriage. The tabloids got wind of it and were requesting interviews. Kate certainly didn’t know what to say or do, so she waited for Discovery to give her the approved “messaging” that they “could all live with.”
On April 29, 2009, at 10:48 AM, Laurie Goldberg wrote to Kate that she had talked to Steve Gray, Kate’s media trainer, and wanted to get him on the phone with them ASAP to go over how to handle the mess and come up with messaging they could all live with and help them move forward.
Laurie told Kate that Vicki from People magazine wanted to talk to her. She said they wouldn’t do it right away, but they would have to cooperate because People had been good to them, even if it was in a week or two after the ugliness had died down somewhat.
SEND IN THE PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS
In the yard sale episode of Jon & Kate Plus Ei8ht, Kate and Jon appear to be doing everything themselves. There is absolutely no sign of them getting any help from production assistants (PAs) or anyone on the crew, but an email from Maggie of Figure 8 Films gave away what really went on during the day’s shoot. Kate must have really been exhausted typing her instructions for the “pa’s.”
Maggie wrote that they had gotten official confirmation from the Community Fellowship Church that the yard sale could be held there on Saturday, September 20th. She said they could arrive at any time to start the setup outside, and someone would open the church from 8-12 so they could use the facilities. She also said that if the weather was bad, they could hold the sale inside the church, and someone would be there to open the door earlier than 8 to accommodate the setup.
Maggie explained that the church did not have any tables that could be brought outside for the sale, so they would look into renting some. She said that if the sale was held inside due to bad weather, however, there were 10 round tables they could use.
Kate replied to Maggie to give her the following instructions. She first told Maggie to include the words “rain or shine” in the newspaper ad for the sale. She said they should rent 12 tables that are 8 feet long, but if only 6-foot-long tables were available, to rent more. Kate said, “We have SOOO much stuff it is unbelievable.” She then asked Maggie if she could also rent a “medium to large Uhaul/ Penske/ whatever brand moving truck to transport the stuff.” Kate said she thought it would work best if the “pa’s” that day went to get the truck, then went to get the yard sale stuff from the storage unit, and then came to their house to load what was in the garage.
Kate told Maggie that she wanted to be at the church at 6 AM to set up, so the production assistants would have to be at her house at 5 AM. She said “they better get lots of sleep the night before!!!! :)”. She then pondered what they would do with any stuff that was left over. She told Maggie “It is not at all junk so we should think of what to do in the way of getting rid of it because it is NOT coming back here!!!”
F
inally, Kate asked Maggie to have Kinkos make signs reading “Proceeds to benefit Pediatric Cancer Research” and told her that she would have Mady and Cara make their own sign for their juicebox/soda/ water stand.
NANNY-GATE
When the Gosselins appeared on the Dr. Phil show, they were offered free nanny service from a company called Nannies 4 Hire. In a Season 3 episode called “Kate Hires a Nanny,” Kate was supposed to select a nanny from candidates chosen by Candi Wingate, the owner of Nannies 4 Hire. It turns out that the nanny Kate ended up hiring didn’t work for Nannies 4 Hire, but they had to pretend she did. The nanny that was hired even had to wear the Nannies 4 Hire T-shirt on camera during the episode, despite the fact that she was not found through Nannies 4 Hire.
Kate must not have been happy when Candi Wingate apparently used the episode to promote her business, and a little brouhaha ensued. On Tuesday, May 19, 2009, at 2:10 PM, Maggie from Figure 8 Films wrote to Kirk Streb, also of Figure 8 Films, to give him information about Candi Wingate.
Maggie told Kirk that Candi Wingate had participated in a shoot for the Season 3 episode “Kate Hires a Nanny” on Saturday September 22, 2007. She explained that the Gosselins had won free nanny service from Candi’s company on Dr. Phil, and the episode was about Kate selecting a nanny from a small pool of candidates chosen by Candi. Maggie recalled that, in the episode, Kate watched Candi interview the girls on closed-circuit TV in the next room. She told Kirk she was going to watch the episode and let him know if she saw “anything about it that comes up as a red flag.”
Maggie then told Kirk the name of Candi Wingate’s husband, and said she attached her release and “a picture (just for kicks).
KATE GOSSELIN: HOW SHE FOOLED THE WORLD - THE RISE AND FALL OF A REALITY TV QUEEN Page 14
