From the day Blake derailed my presentation months ago, he’d captivated something in me. What had grown between us since I could no longer be without. Maybe he felt the same way, and that ever present need—to touch, to hold, to be lost in each other through the long nights—was a manifestation of that nameless emotion between us.
Between our afternoon romp, the activities in town, and the fresh air on the island, I was exhausted by the time we pulled up to the house. I shivered when we stepped into the cool air. I much preferred the breezy summer air over the climate control of the indoors. I’d spent too many months cold, yearning for summer. The warm sun was not something to waste.
Always so in tune, Blake rubbed my arms, coaxing some warmth into the chill that had worked its way over me.
“Are you hungry?”
“A little, yeah.”
“Go relax on the deck. I’ll grab something for us to eat.”
I agreed and stepped out onto the deck that gave an unobstructed view of the ocean beyond. I sank into one of the Adirondacks and propped my feet on a stool. I closed my eyes and let the warm breeze dance over my skin as the sun set. The sounds of ocean waves lapping against the sandy shore might have lulled me to sleep if I’d been alone a few minutes longer.
Blake joined me then, setting a plate with cheeses, crackers, and meats on a table. He poured white wine into two glasses and handed me one.
“Thank you,” I said.
His eyes glittering warmly. I met his smile, wondering what had inspired that look since I saw him moments ago. “You’re happy.”
He sat back, smirking before taking a drink. “I am very happy. You have that effect on me, you know.”
My heart sang. I tipped the glass, and as the fruity liquid hit my tongue, I knew this had been a great idea. Three days of peace and quiet with Blake was already pure heaven. I relaxed into the chair.
“This is amazing, Blake. I could stay out here forever. It’s so peaceful.”
“Careful what you wish for. I’ll have us moved out here by the week’s end.”
I laughed. “No kidding. I can’t make a wish without you rushing in to make it come true.”
His eyes held me steady, serious in their depth. The humor in my words faded away when I thought about what a gift he was to me. I took a breath, suddenly overwhelmed by that truth. What had I done to deserve such an amazing man to call my own?
“You know there’s no way I can thank you for everything you do for me. I kid, but seriously, how can I ever repay you for all the wonderful things you’ve done?”
“I’m sure I’ll think of something.” He nodded to my glass. “Drink up.”
I sighed and took a long sip. I nearly spit the liquid out when something hard fell against my lips. I swallowed quickly and looked inside the glass.
Oh my God.
I straightened, planting my feet on the ground, though nothing could ground me for what I was seeing. I stared stupidly into the glass, frozen and vaguely aware that Blake had moved to kneel at my feet. His palms brushed along the sides of my bare thighs up to my shorts.
“Breathe, baby.”
I inhaled on command, my eyes unable to shift from the shiny diamond-studded ring that rested in the empty well of my glass. I couldn’t think. I could barely breathe.
“This hasn’t been a one-way street. You’ve given me just as much as I’ve given you. You’ve loved me at times when I haven’t made it so easy for you to... Erica, honey, look at me.”
I swallowed over the tight prickle in my throat. Tears burned my eyes as I met his warm gaze. “This is crazy,” I whispered.
“This might be crazy, but this is our life, and I want to spend it with you, as your husband. I want to come home to you and know you’ll always be there. I want to make love to you every night and wake up with you every morning for the rest of my life.”
I shook my head in disbelief, tears falling. I searched for words, but none came.
He brushed away the wetness on my cheeks and reached for my glass. Tipping it, he retrieved the ring and set the glass away. He grasped my hand gently and looked up at me.
“Erica, will you marry me?”
I stared into his eyes, now green and bright in the fading daylight. Time stood still as the question echoed in my mind, as the enormity of what he was asking me sank in. Could this be real? Could he really mean it?
“Are you sure?”
He smiled. Somehow he’d never looked so gorgeous. “Yes, I’m sure.”
“Are we rushing into this? That’s what everyone’s going to say.”
His eyes widened a fraction. “We’ve been through enough to fill a lifetime. I don’t need any more time to know you’re the one I want to be with. And I seriously don’t give a damn what anyone else has to say about it. Neither should you.”
I looked past him to the steady ebb and flow of the ocean. Our little paradise had become that much more surreal. To be Blake’s wife, to tie our lives together, irrevocably. I’d thought of it, of course. I’d tried not to read into his insinuations about a future of forever. Deep down that was what I wanted too, though. As much as the prospect terrified me when I thought about what it really meant, I did want forever with Blake. He brushed his thumb over the skin above my knuckle, sending a rush to my heart. I loved this man, and I couldn’t believe anything would ever change that.
“Okay,” I said quietly.
He cocked an eyebrow. “Okay?”
I smiled. “Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
I laughed softly. “Yes, I’m sure. I—I want to marry you. I love you, Blake. How could I say anything but yes?”
His face split with a smile. He slipped the sparkling band over my knuckle and into place, pressing a kiss where it sat. He stood, bringing me with him and into his arms. We were wrapped together so tightly, I could scarcely take a breath.
“I love you, Erica. You’ll never understand how much, but I’m going to try like hell to show you.”
I held him back and the reality of our promise settled over me, warming me from limb to limb. Our love filled me, until I thought my heart might explode with it.
In that moment, I knew I could never love anyone the way I loved Blake.
CHAPTER FIVE
The rest of the weekend flew by. Blake took us out on the water, jetting us to outlying islands where we basked in the sun and listened to the steady rush of the ocean water until we were too tired or hungry to stay longer. We explored every quiet corner of the island. We ate and drank and made love. We talked and made promises. Every minute was like its own little paradise.
This commitment between us still felt new, like a dream. But so was being on the island, isolated from our real world. Every time my eyes lit on the sparkle of the band on my finger, my heart leapt. It was a brilliant and overwhelming reminder of Blake’s love. Both thrilled and apprehensive of what it meant for our future, I couldn’t help but fantasize about our happily ever after.
“Do you like the ring?”
I looked up at Blake, who’d caught me admiring it as our plane approached Boston’s dusky skyline. “I love it. It’s simple.”
“We can pick out something bigger if you want. I took a risk with it. I wasn’t sure what you’d want.”
“No, I want this. It’s perfect.”
“Good.” He grinned and squeezed my hand gently. “We’ll put another one next to it, and then I’ll know I have you for good.”
I envisioned its companion, and the meaning struck me.
“Like the bracelets.”
He nodded.
“You’ll have me cuffed and bound to you forever, Blake. You sure you want that?”
He leaned in, taking my lips in a gentle kiss. “That’s the idea.”
My heart twisted. A tiny flutter of nerves hit my belly at the thought of being Blake’s forever. His wife.
As our plane floated toward Logan Airport, I regretted that we were returning so soon. The break had been amazing but sh
ort-lived. I was still high on it, but less pleasant realities waited for both of us. Whatever trouble came our way, we’d face it together. I’d made Blake a promise that we always would. No more running and no more trying to be strong on my own. Fighting my own independent nature wasn’t easy, but sharing my life, the good and the bad, was more important now than ever.
When we stepped into the apartment, Alli met me with a squeal and tight hug. I laughed and hugged her back. The happiness of having my best friend so close compounded with this news, warming me.
Heath’s hand slapped Blake’s in a shake. “Congrats, man.”
A small smile spread across Blake’s face. “Thanks.”
Heath’s focus shifted to me and he pulled me into a tight hug. “Erica, future sister-in-law. You have no idea what you’re getting into with this one, but more power to you.”
I laughed and pushed him back playfully. The two men wandered into the living room and talked while Alli all but dragged me toward the kitchen so she could inspect the ring. She studied it for several seconds as the light danced off the diamonds. I smiled, thrilled all over again that he’d asked, that I’d agreed. Without even having had the chance to fantasize about what that moment between us might be like, I’d known immediately it was what I wanted.
Alli ran a thumb over the band, one eyebrow raised. “This is different.”
I shrugged, not quite sure what to say. I wasn’t about to tell her that the bracelets he’d given me months ago doubled as handcuffs, and this ring held a similar symbolism. “Different, but it’s us. I love it. Plus, how am I supposed to work on a computer all day with some huge rock on my finger?”
She leaned back against the counter, her gaze lifting from the ring to my eyes for the first time in several minutes. She studied me then, with almost as much intrigue as she’d studied my diamonds.
“So if I know you, your mind must be going a million miles an hour with all this.”
I laughed. “A little. I’m just...”
“What?”
I sighed. “I don’t know. I think I’m still in shock that he wants this, you know, to make things permanent.”
“Blake is crazy about you. You know that.”
“It was an easy decision to make. Obviously I’m head over heels for him too. Not like he would have taken no for an answer anyway.” I laughed to myself, trying to imagine what lengths he would have gone to get the answer he wanted.
While my thoughts ran away from me, Alli smiled broadly and bounced a little. “I’m so happy for you, Erica! I’ve been freaking out all weekend. Heath told me after you left, and I’ve been dying to see you again.”
“I had no idea,” I said, admiring Blake’s gift, his promise.
“This can’t have been the first time you’ve talked about marriage.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Why, have you?”
A flush reddened her cheeks. “I’m not talking about me. I’m talking about you. Usually people talk about marriage before proposing. Test the waters and what not.”
“He mentioned it once, kind of in jest I think, but I told him he was crazy. And I meant it. I still think this is all kind of crazy. I’m scared to death, but I want to be with him. If this is what he wants and it needs to be now, so be it.”
The whole prospect was overwhelming and unexpected. I loved Blake without condition, but solidifying our relationship with marriage was something I wasn’t considering as a possibility for years more.
Marriage, to me, implied stability, something sure and reliable. Happily ever after and all good things. Conversely, very little in my life felt stable right now except my love for Blake. Despite his reassurances, the future of the business would worry me deeply until I knew it was safe along with everyone’s jobs.
Clozpin was so much more than a job, and seeing it successful was more than a short-term goal. I needed it to work, for so many reasons. If it didn’t, I’d be even more dependent on Blake’s wealth and security. While I appreciated that he would be that for me and never make me feel less for it, the idea of being completely dependent on someone else was unsettling.
“So have you thought of a date? A venue?”
I laughed at Alli’s enthusiasm but also fought a wave of anxiety at sorting out all those details. When on earth would I have time for that? Did his family expect something big? I’d been so overwhelmed with the proposal, I hadn’t even thought to ask Blake what his thoughts were on the matter. I was still trying to wrap my head around the basic concept of marriage.
“I seriously have no idea what we’re going to do or when.”
Alli’s big brown eyes were wide and expectant.
“But of course I could use your help,” I added quickly.
She smiled and bounced again. I laughed at her boundless enthusiasm. She was going to be an invaluable resource on all things wedding. If anyone could pull it off, Alli could.
“You’re the one who should be getting married. You probably have the whole thing planned out already.” My voice was hushed, and I looked behind my shoulder quickly to make sure Heath hadn’t heard me.
“I might, but I’ll settle for planning yours for now. Who knows when or if we’ll ever get around to it.”
“Sounds like you two have actually talked about it though?”
She shrugged and leaned her hip against the counter. “A little, but that’s a huge step. We know we’re not quite ready for that. I do have some more good news for you though.”
“Oh?” My eyebrows lifted with curiosity.
“Heath and I found a new place. It’s pretty close, but I’m sure Blake will be psyched to have his apartment back. We’re going to start moving things over this week, so Mr. Broody won’t need to share you with me anymore.” She smiled and poked my shoulder.
I smiled, happy for her and for us. “You must be excited.”
“I am. It’s the first time we’ll be getting a place together, that’s ours. It’s already vacant, so we should be moved over completely in a few days.”
“That’s awesome. Let me know if I can help.”
“Don’t worry about it. You focus on work. I know you have plenty to catch up on at the office, but pencil me in for dinner next week. Heath wants to invite the family over to see the new place. Plus I’m sure everyone will want to talk wedding details, so that will be fun.”
“Okay,” I agreed weakly.
The knot in my stomach grew at the mention of Blake’s family. I loved them, but they were a little overwhelming sometimes. Was there such a thing as being too nice, caring too much? Maybe by comparison to my family. The thought of inviting the Hathaways into my life to celebrate this occasion was unsettling at best. They’d done little more than shun my mother since the day she told them she was pregnant with me. Would they shun me now too, or feign interest and attend as if they’d cared at all my whole life? Either scenario seemed stressful, but I didn’t want to deprive Blake’s family of an occasion that might mean the world to them. Heaven help me, our two families could not be more different.
To avoid further inquisition, I pulled Alli back into the living room and we chatted away the rest of the evening with the guys. I relaxed into Blake’s side, grateful, in love, and determined to make the most of the last few hours of our break away from the world.
* * *
The office had been quiet this week, save the quiet hum of machines and tapping of keyboards as people worked. I was doing some quick math when my phone rang. Daniel’s number lit up the screen. For the first time in weeks I considered answering. As soon as I reestablished contact with him, the battle to maintain a healthy separation between our lives and business affairs would begin. I hadn’t felt up to it, and after learning that two more advertisers would be closing their accounts with us since PinDeelz launched, I wasn’t sure why I would be now. Perhaps out of sheer desperation to occupy my mind with something other than the downward spiral of my business, I answered.
“Daniel, hi.”
“Hi. I wasn
’t sure you’d answer.”
I wanted to be honest in my response, but I also didn’t want to piss him off. I’d really hoped this next chapter of our relationship wouldn’t be so contentious. I wasn’t sure if I could survive it if it was. Daniel Fitzgerald had proven himself to be both violent and dangerous, but I forced myself to believe I could harness the man behind the political machine, behind the layers of societal pressure to be all that he’d become. Despite all my misgivings, something inside me was committed to salvage what I could from our warped father-daughter relationship.
“I’ve been out of town,” I said, offering a half-truth. “How are you?”
“The campaign has been doing well, so I can’t complain. How about you?”
“Um, good.”
His silence extended over the next few seconds, and I felt an odd pressure to fill it.
“Blake and I are engaged.”
He paused. “I suppose congratulations are in order.”
“Thanks.” My voice was small. I had hard time believing he was genuinely happy for me, when he was the reason why Blake and I had spent the most agonizing weeks of my life apart. The separation had almost ruined us.
“Assuming you haven’t forgotten about the campaign work we discussed,” he said.
I inhaled, steeling myself to hold my ground.
“I needed some time, Daniel, after everything. But no, I haven’t forgotten.”
“Have you had enough time then? Can we meet to discuss? Time is running down on the clock, and your contribution is still important. I’m not taking anything for granted with this race.”
I tapped my pen, my thoughts swirling around my own business problems. “Maybe. When did you want to meet?” The last thing I wanted to admit was the state of the business. That could open a door to him pushing me to work for him permanently. I couldn’t imagine any worse punishment for failing at entrepreneurship than being forced into that arrangement.
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