by Sarah Hoss
“Nay, I’ll be all right.” He pulled out a chair and sat down at the table as she brought him a drink.
“Do you think the storm will last long?” she asked, hoping it wouldn’t, not wanting to be on edge for the rest of the day.
“Ye never know here in the Highlands, it rains all the time, or havena ye noticed?”
“I have noticed, but this isn’t a shower, this is a bad storm.”
He put down the bite he was about to take. “Why doona ye like storms?”
Marlana laid the towel on the table and took a seat across from him. She swallowed. “My Aunt and Uncle live in a part of America where there are a lot of storms. It even has a nickname, Tornado Alley. One summer, we went to visit them. We’d been there for a week and were getting ready to leave the next day. The day had been uneventful, but as the day progressed, the weather got worse.”
Unable to sit and tell the story, she stood and walked to the fireplace. “Alex, I’d never experienced anything like that in my entire life. I can still hear the tornado as it took the house. Trees were uprooted, homes destroyed, and cars thrown about like they were a child’s toy. People died. My leg was broken and I had to wear a cast for months.” She turned to stare at him. “Needless to say, I don’t like storms.” As if on cue, lightning flashed through the windows, followed by thunder. Marlana jumped, then closed her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she took up his bloody shirt and focused once again on the task before her.
Hearing Marlana talk about the storms had intrigued Alexander. The emotions that played across her face tugged at his heart. He wanted to pull her into his arms and comfort her, to erase the fear he saw in her eyes when she looked outside. At times, it was so easy to think of her as someone he was helping, a stranger. But when they sat like this and she shared a part of herself, she became real, closer to him, a friend. A friend is something he could deal with. Could he deal with more? Did he want more? The conversation with Margaret came back to his mind. He sat still, food forgotten, and studied Marlana as she scrubbed his shirt clean.
Marlana turned the shirt over and over. Her brows furrowed as she worked. She was beautiful; her hair hanging long and loose. The strands were dark brown, but with the firelight flickering on them, red highlights shone through. Her eyes were hazel and he’d been close enough a few times to notice they were green on the outside with a light brown ring around the center. She had a tempting mouth and he loved the way she bit her lower lip when she was concentrating or really nervous about something.
His groin tightened and he shifted in his chair. Almost a year without a woman was catching up to him. Women had approached him before, but he’d never been interested. What was different about her? She reached down to dunk his bloody shirt into the bowl of water and scrubbed on the stain again. He wondered about her world and thought for a moment that she was beginning to fit into his. What would it be like to have her in his life permanently?
He stood abruptly and headed toward the door. He needed to get outside in the cool air and away from her. If he didn’t, he might be tempted to take her in his arms and kiss her, and this time, he would do it thoroughly. She was creating havoc on his senses. How much longer could he stay away from her?
Marlana stormed outside to find him. She hated not being able to read his moods, to not know what he was thinking. Twice now, she had opened up to him and he had not returned the favor.
Damn it! They were going to have it out once and for all.
She walked outside to find Alexander standing near the fence. Of course, where else would he be? Definitely not inside talking with her. He was always thinking about things. Couldn’t he share some of those thoughts with her once in a while? Only a light rain fell now. She stopped a few steps behind him.
“Please, tell me what I did wrong. You’re driving me crazy.”
He swiveled to stare at her. “I doona know what ye mean, lass.” A look of confusion crossed his features.
Her eyes pleaded with him for some knowledge that she was not alone in all of this. Maybe she really didn’t mean anything to him. Maybe she was just a passing stranger. But damn it, she needed to know what he thought and how he was feeling.
He just stood there, remaining quiet.
“You don’t fight fair, you know that?” She poked him in the chest as she spoke. “You get these looks I can’t read, then you rush out of the house like you can’t get far enough away from me. I don’t know what to say or do. You wanted me to confide in you and I have been. Please tell me something so I can understand.” She wiped cold, wet hair out of her eyes.
When he said nothing, she stepped away for a minute, then turned back to him, hands on her hips. “Fine. I’ll enlighten you. You had no right to kiss me the other day, then walk off like I’d done something wrong. You stumbled onto me. You should’ve turned around and left. You acted so disgusted when you broke the kiss, but I’ll tell you something, that little noise you made spoke differently.” She arched her left eyebrow for emphasis.
Something flashed in his eyes, only to be quickly hidden again.
A single tear slipped down her cheek mixing with the mist of rain as she laid both of her hands over her heart. “Why do you hate me?”
His gaze narrowed at the comment. “Is that what ye think?” There was a hint of surprise in his voice. He reached out for her, but she brushed it off, stepping to the side and out of his way. She was not going to give in so quickly.
“Fine, I deserved that.”
She turned her back to him.
“Never think that I could hate ye. It’s truly the opposite.” She heard his deep intake of breath. “I’m sorry for making ye feel as if something was yer fault.” He walked up behind her, but didn’t touch her. “I want ye fiercely, I feel like I canna breathe sometimes. There lies the problem.”
Tension hung in the air. Rain dripped off her eyelashes and nose. She felt a tug on her dress sleeve, and she allowed him to lead her into the barn, out of the weather. She shivered and he picked up a blanket, putting it around her shoulders. He reached out to touch her, but his hand went still in mid-air. He clenched and unclenched his fist, then slowly dropped it to his side.
“I’ve been angry a long time over losing my wife and child. I still miss them. I tell myself it’s a betrayal to want ye.” He ran a hand through his hair and over his face, then reached out to touch her shoulder.
“Everywhere I go, the memory of that kiss is always close at hand.” He gently touched Marlana’s cheek. “The other day when I found ye at the water, I had only come to see if ye were well.” A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “But there ye stood with the waning light shining on ye and the water glistening. Ye were stunning.” He dropped his hand back to his side. “I knew I should have left, but ye were biting your lip, like ye are doing now.”
Marlana felt the heat rise in her cheeks and looked off toward the barn doors. She brought the blanket up tighter around her shoulders.
“When I kissed ye, Mairi’s words rang in my head and that is why I quit. I was angry. I was kissing ye and she came to my mind.”
Turning to him, Marlana asked, “What are you talking about? What does Mairi have to do with us?”
Alexander glanced over her head for a minute. His jaw clenched and his composure changed. Then he looked at her with such openness.
“Mairi.” He took a deep breath and exhaled. “Mairi was my first love. I lost her and the child at the same time. How do I stop thinking about her? How can I love ye properly when I still hold love for her within my heart?”
Marlana swallowed. “I never asked you to stop loving her and I don’t expect you to. Alexander, I’m sorry for your loss, I really am. But I’m not Mairi. You cannot compare us and you can love us both, just differently.”
“I’m not trying to compare ye.” He kicked at the dirt floo
r.
“You’re putting me into an unfair fight against her. I hadn’t realized it until now.”
When she stood and started to walk away, he grabbed her arm and spun her around. “What do ye mean?”
“Over you,” she said in a choked whisper. “Mairi has a hold on you that I can’t seem to penetrate ...” Marlana jerked her arm free of his grasp. “... and I’m beginning to think I never will. I’m not asking you to choose, Alex, I’m just asking you to let me in.” Staring at him for only a second longer, she turned and ran into the woods.
An hour passed and Alexander’s heart had slowed its pace, his muscles were less tense. He’d needed a moment before he went to talk to her, to think about all she had said and what it meant. Maybe he was being unfair, but his heart had a mind of its own. It didn’t want to let go of Mairi, yet it wanted to reach out and grab a hold of Marlana. The struggle he had between the two was more difficult than he could have ever imagined.
Walking outside, he checked the yard for Marlana, to no avail. The garden, maybe he would find her there. He strode leisurely over to it, but when he didn’t see her, he began to worry, his heart pounding in his chest. She’d run off into the woods. Hadn’t he warned her about the dangers? He went back into the house, strapped on his bow and quiver of arrows, and headed for the woods. How many times had he told her not to go wandering off alone?
He strode out of the yard and in the direction of the loch. Maybe she’d thought to take another bath. He frowned. He didn’t like the idea of her bathing out here. Remembering that Colyn and his group had stopped by unexpectedly angered him. Anyone could find her. He thought back to the day that he’d stumbled across her. A lazy half smile unconsciously appeared.
He had only been going out to find her, yet never expected to see her naked, wet, and beautiful. When he’d rounded the tree and saw her standing there, his heart had slammed into his chest and a tightening gripped his groin. The way she’d stood there with the water running down her soft, white skin. The sun made the droplets glisten, making her sparkle. He remembered the way the wind blew and goose bumps rose all over her body.
Yes, he could remember everything like it was happening right in front of him. Just thinking about her made him hard all over again. His mind replayed the look on her face when she saw him standing there. She was surprised, a little embarrassed, but had there been a look that said she was glad he was there? He knew she liked him. He’d seen the look of want on her face a couple of times. Her hands had quickly flown to try and cover herself, not that she could really hide anything. He’d already seen her nude form, and had her image branded in his mind.
Her breasts were perfect. A little on the large side, but they were round and firm and he’d wanted to reach out and touch the rose-colored nipples that sprang to life because of the cold. How he wanted to make them spring to life because of passion. He wanted to bury his face in the cleft of her breasts and run his hands up and down the length of her. To feel the softness of her skin would make him happy.
He stopped, staring into nothing. He replayed that last thought in his head. Would make him happy. How long had it been since those words had crossed his mind? This woman was playing havoc on his senses and he didn’t know what to make of it.
He shook his head and tried to focus on the area around him. He had traveled a long way and hadn’t remembered any of it. He could have passed her and not even known it. Glancing around, he realized he hadn’t headed toward the loch at all, but toward the middle of the forest. He stopped to listen for her and his heart sank. He knew exactly what that noise was and what it meant.
The forest closed in around her as she ran, trying to put distance between her and that jerk. She wanted to think. Never in her life had she been anywhere for such a short amount of time and had so many emotions run through her at once; anger, sadness, depression, and believe it or not, she was falling in love. How on earth had she let that happen again? Hadn’t she sworn off men? Now, here she was, in a place that she knew nothing about, in a time that wasn’t hers, and falling in love with a man that had no interest in her. You are a complete idiot, Marlana! The thought repeated in her mind.
Leaning up against a tree, she twisted to rest her forehead on the bark and let her mind go blank. Just a moment or two of reprieve from her thoughts would be nice. She didn’t know how far she had walked, but she wanted to stay still for a moment and rest.
She opened her eyes and pivoted around to lay her back against the tree, letting her eyes survey her surroundings. Nothing looked familiar, which meant she had come farther than Alexander had previously led her. A small spark of panic ignited in her chest, but she wouldn’t let it get the best of her. Panic only caused trouble. If she was to find her way back to the house, she needed to keep a level head. Alexander would be angry with her for wandering so far away. All the things he said could happen to her started to play in her mind.
Damn him. The first thing she had to do was not think on the things he told her. That would just cause panic. Instead, she glanced around and tried to remember which way she had come. Since she hadn’t moved around the tree from where she stopped, the sensible thing to do would be go back the way she was facing.
“Very good, Marlana. Keep thinking things of a positive nature and we can get out of this easily.” She frowned for a second, realizing she was talking to herself. Wasn’t that the first sign of insanity? Chuckling, she started to walk away from the tree when she heard a sound and froze. Listening to make sure her ears weren’t playing tricks, the noise came again. Her heart started to beat uncontrollably. She didn’t know what to do.
The wolf was the biggest she’d ever seen. It let out a long and loud growl. Spittle dangled from its massive teeth. The beast eyed her. If she ran, it would follow, enjoying the chase. And even if she could have thought to run, her legs would never have agreed. They had a mind of their own and they were staying put.
She held still, trying to take in every detail. If she stood next to the wolf, his front shoulders would reach her hips, about the size of a Newfoundland dog. This couldn’t be normal size.
A strong odor penetrated her nose and she realized it came from the wolf, making her stomach turn. They were about fifty feet away from each other and she said a quick prayer that the wolf would walk away. She wasn’t posing any kind of threat. But she didn’t know enough about wolves to know if that made a difference. She peered around, wondering where the others were. Wolves always traveled in packs.
The animal growled again and took a step closer, causing her to step back, bumping into the tree. There was nowhere to go and she watched the wolf parade back and forth. His intent was obvious now; there was no doubt in her mind she was to be his next meal. She had invaded his territory and he didn’t like it. She started to look around, but returned her gaze to the wolf. The need to stay focused on the animal was the most important thing. Sweat beaded on her forehead, her heart thundered in her chest.
Time stood still. Was this what it was like to face death? It wasn’t how she figured it would happen.
Funny how acute your senses become, she could smell the dirty fur as if it was right under her nose, and she heard geese in the back ground, flying overhead. Swallowing, to moisten her throat, she took a deep breath. That’s when she heard a scream and she didn’t know where it came from. It didn’t sound like her voice. Suddenly, Alexander leapt through the air from her right side and lunged for the wolf. This time, she did scream.
Marlana could do nothing but stand and stare at Alexander. It was his war cry she heard and when she saw him ready to confront the wolf, she knew terror all over again. When she screamed, he had quickly glanced in her direction and she put her hand over her mouth so she wouldn’t cry out again. She couldn’t distract him. If anything happened to him, she would never forgive herself. She sent up a silent prayer to keep him safe.
Eve
rything seemed to speed up at that point. She saw a flash of tartan. She ran around to crouch behind the tree as growling and grunts wrenched through the air; animal against man; a test of strength and will. She laid her head down on her knees and her arms wrapped tightly around her legs, so tightly she lost circulation in her hands. She rocked back and forth, praying for his safety. It was all she could do and she hoped it would be enough.
All of a sudden, a large growl penetrated her ears, then everything went silent. A tear slipped from her eye and slid down her cheek. She squeezed her eyes shut; frozen to immobility. She wanted so desperately to see if he was all right, but she was too scared to move. All she could do was rock back and forth, praying. She heard the crack of twigs in front of her. Her mind raced with images of the wolf. Something touched her arm and she screamed.
Then she heard his voice.
She stopped her struggling and opened her eyes. He had her hands captured in his. She couldn’t breathe. She glanced around quickly, then turned to look at him.
“Where is it?” Tears started to fall again. She glanced around wildly trying to find the wolf, expecting the animal to attack them at any minute.
Alexander took her chin in his hand and gently turned her face to see the wolf lying on the ground about thirty-five feet away from them. The breath she’d been holding escaped and she turned to focus her attention on Alexander and saw blood on his chest. New panic broke through.
“Oh, my God, Alex, you’re bleeding.” She tried to lift his shirt, wanting to see the injury. Fresh tears blurred her vision.
Alexander stopped her fumbling; taking both of her hands in his, and laid them in her lap. “I’m fine mo nighean mhaiseach. The blood is not mine.” He brushed the hair out of her eyes. His touch held tenderness, even though his breathing still labored and his muscles were tense.
