by L. P. Maxa
I shook my head, hitting redial. The crazy shit was probably something stupid. Like Dagger ate my new controller or I walked in on Smith nailing your sister. His phone rang twice before he picked up.
“B! Holy shit.”
“Why are you whispering? Are you hiding in the closet again? You know Dash is never scared when you jump out at him like that. You only piss him off.” I checked my mirrors and backed out of my parking spot.
“No. I’m not in the closet.” I heard some rustling around and then a door closed. “A social worker came to the house this morning—”
“A social worker? Why? Ooooo, does Smith have some Cajun love child? Was Dylan pissed?” I was mostly kidding.
“No. I do.”
I pulled to the shoulder, slamming on my brakes. I ignored the cars behind me as they honked on their way past. “What?!”
“Yeah. This really nice lady brought this tiny little girl to our house. And she said that this little girl, Landry, her name is Landry. Anyway, she said that Landry’s mom put my name on her birth certificate as her father.”
“Holy. Shit.” I turned the AC down. I was suddenly sweating. “Do you remember her mom?”
“Really? Of course not. I’m a horrible slut of a man.”
I couldn’t argue with that. I’d heard stories from Dylan, as well as read plenty in the gossip mags. Didn’t make me adore him any less though, nothing could.
“I did a paternity test. We won’t have the results for a couple of days. But she’s here.”
I rested my forehead against my steering wheel. “The mom?”
“No. Landry. She’s staying here, with us.”
I was silent. I didn’t know what to say to that. I was proud of him for stepping up and taking her in. But I had no words of wisdom, no advice I could dole out.
“B? You still there?”
“Yeah, I’m here. I just… I mean… I have no idea what to say, Jacks.” Was it odd that part of me was jealous? Jealous of this chick who had his baby? Not that I wanted to have Jacks’s baby or anything. We were friends. Just flirty friends.
“Say you’ll come see me. Please, doll, I need you.”
His words tugged at my heart, but seeing him again in person sounded like a recipe for disaster. He had enough going on at home, and our being around each other would only complicate things. There was attraction under our friendship, no doubt about it. “Jacks…”
“You are my best friend, B. Please.”
I banged my head on the steering wheel. To top it off, Dylan had no idea I’d been talking to Jacks. “No one even knows we’re friends. My sister is going to flip shit.”
“Please, baby doll.”
Yep, I was a typical girl, pet names were my undoing. “Fine.” I put my car in drive and pulled back out onto the main road. “But you’re buying my ticket.”
“Of course! Thank you, thank you, thank you. You are going to love Landry.”
I’d literally just finished my college career an hour ago. And all of a sudden I was getting booked on a flight to Florida? This was why my friends called me flighty. This was quite possibly going to end up being a huge mistake. Jacks was charismatic and adorable and so damn attractive. I was already in lust with his personality. What was going to happen when I was staying under the same roof? I took a deep breath and straightened my spine. I would just have to stay strong, and stay focused on helping him through this. He didn’t need added stress or distractions. And I refused to lose him as a friend because we ruined it with sex. AKA, he became clingy and I got irritated.
***
Three hours later and I was at the airport, with my carry-on stowed safely in the overhead bin and my phone in my hands. I fired off a quick text to Jacks, letting him know that I had boarded, before turning it off and dropping it into my purse. This was an odd situation. Dylan had no idea that Jacks and I had become friends… I wasn’t sure how she would take it. I knew Jacks’s reputation, I knew the life he led. No one would understand our friendship; they wouldn’t think he was capable of having a girl as a friend. Which meant everyone was going to assume we were boning (his choice of words, not mine). Although my sister had hooked up with a man-whoring rock star…so it wouldn’t be fair if she got pissed about that. The problem was, Dylan had a hair-trigger temper when it came to lies and secrets. And what about this little girl? Her life had just been turned upside down. Did she really need one more person in the mix? I leaned my head back and took a deep breath. If it was anyone else asking this of me, I’d say no.
“Where you headed, gorgeous?”
I looked to my left at the man sitting next to me. He was handsome enough, in that older distinguished sort of way. He was wearing a black suit with a blood-red tie. And sporting a hefty wedding ring tan. “Florida. Just like you. Because, we’re on the same flight.”
The man’s smile never faltered. “You have beautiful eyes.”
“Yes, I know. Thank you.” I wasn’t vain, but I heard that all the time and this guy was irritating me. My best friend just found out he was a dad, I was going to have to deal with my sister’s bitch fit, and Casanova over here wanted to join the mile-high club.
He let out a little chuckle. “Business or pleasure?”
Really?
“Neither. I have a sentencing hearing coming up. I cut off my ex-husband’s dick and fed it to our dog.” I looked pointedly at his ring finger and then back to his face. “He cheated on me.” I smiled as the man moved over one seat to the window and pulled out a magazine. Problem solved.
Chapter Three
Jacks
I booked Bryan on the first flight out here. When the shock of this morning wore off, she was my first thought. If I could just have my best friend here, then everything would be okay. Bryan didn’t see me as the immature playboy the rest of my friends saw me as, she saw more. She made me want to be more. That’s what made me know she was in fact my best friend. My roommates had scattered in different directions when Landry had come back inside with Dagger. Dylan had to go to work, Lexi was down in the studio editing photos while Smith and Dash started on ideas for the new album. And our drummer, Luke? Well, Lukey had come in the front door looking like hammered shit and promptly shut himself in his room. I didn’t know what the hell was going on with that guy, but he was partying waaaaay more than he used to. It had started a couple of months ago and was escalating quickly.
It was just Landry and I in the living room now. We were sitting on the couch with about two feet of space between us. She had the remote in her hand and her head leaned back against the cushions. I’d asked her if she wanted to watch a movie, thinking I’d finally be able to catch that new Pixar flick. But instead she’d chosen a documentary on the Animal Planet about chimpanzees. The girl liked monkeys? I’d buy her a monkey. At this point I’d buy her anything she wanted to get her to talk to me. The only member of this family that warranted a happy response from her was Dagger. Which reminded me I needed to buy her a puppy.
I didn’t want Landry to catch me staring at her so I kept my head straight like I was watching TV, but every once in a while I’d cut my eyes to the side, taking her in. She really was very pretty with her dark hair and her light eyes. She was striking, like Bryan and Dylan. This little girl was going to grow up and be gorgeous. Her poor fath…oh wait, that was probably me. Shit. The longer I looked at her, the more I saw. Her beautiful hair had edges that were jagged and uneven. Almost like she had tried to cut it herself. And she was thin, thinner than I thought a kid should be. Her jeans were three inches too short and her shoes looked like they’d seen better days. I wondered if all the clothes in her suitcase were too small. I should take her shopping. No. I should wait for Bryan to get here, then I’d take her shopping. I glanced down at my watch; that was five hours from now. What was I supposed to do with Landry until then? She was going to need to eat again, right? And how many documentaries could one kid watch in one day before it was considered too many? Okay, I’d take her shopping and fee
d her and then we could swing by the airport and pick up B. And then everything would be okay. Once Bryan got here, things would be fine because she’s a girl and she’s my friend and she’ll know what to do. At least until my mom gets home. I should have never bought my parents those stupid cruise tickets.
“Hey, um, Landry?” She turned to look at me, her expression never changing. Talk about stoic. Except for those eyes, they were expressive. They held caution and doubt and fear. She was just as terrified as I was. She was just stronger than I was. Her life had made her that way…. The horrible person I’d knocked up had made her that way. “Um, well, I was…I had planned on going shopping today for some new clothes. Would you like to come and do some shopping, too? I mean, with me?”
Her voice was steady. “I don’t have any money.”
What was I supposed to say to that? Well, kiddo, as a matter of fact you do have money. Whether by design or accident, you hit the genetic jackpot! “I have money and I would very much like to give you some…to go shopping with.”
“Really?” Now those baby blues held hope. Just a tiny spark of hope.
My chest swelled with emotion, and suddenly I wanted to give this kid the whole damn world. “Yes, will you go with me?”
“Okay.”
“Okay? Okay, good. We’ll go after the monkey show is over.”
Landry turned back toward the TV. “Chimpanzees aren’t monkeys; they are apes.” She used the remote to point at the screen. “You need to pay closer attention.”
***
I had no clue where to take a young girl shopping. I knew where I liked to shop, and I knew where Lexi and Dylan liked to shop…so we went to Nordstrom’s. We walked in and headed straight to the personal shopper section. I did not need to incite a chick mob in front of Landry. She needed normalcy, not grown women asking me to sign their breasts. Our personal shopper’s name was Garrett; he was as gay as the day was long. And I loved him. He made Landry laugh, so in my book? He was a superhero.
“What about these?”
I looked up from the game I was playing on my PS3 to see Landry standing in a very pretty sundress. She was smiling. “It’s perfect. We’ll take it in every color.”
Garrett put his hands on his hips. “Whatever you say, Daddy Warbucks.”
Landry looked up at him. “Who’s Daddy Warbucks?”
Garrett put his hand on her shoulder, steering her back toward her plush dressing room. “You’ve never seen Annie?”
And that’s how the next hour went. If Landry was smiling I told her she looked amazing and I loved whatever she was wearing. If she looked uncomfortable, I shook my head. This all seemed to make her happy. But she still wasn’t really talking to me. I could hear her laughing with Garrett in the dressing room and she held his hand as they flitted around the store. Still, she never said much to me. I was trying not to take it personally. I was freaked out too. Total uncharted territory.
We were standing at the private cash register while they totaled up our purchases and boxed up all Landry’s new clothes and shoes. I looked down when she tugged on my shirt. “What’s up, Buttercup?”
She held her hand out. “You said I could use your money.”
“Yes, ma’am, I sure did.” I smiled and pulled out my wallet. “Here you go.” I handed her my black AmEx card.
She stood on her tiptoes and placed the card on the counter. Garrett took it from her. “Thank you, my lady.”
I looked down when I heard her giggle at his words. She was wearing a pair of black leggings with a bright pink tutu and t-shirt. She had on a pair of bright pink Chucks. She looked like she’d just stepped out of a GAP Kids catalogue. Much better. There was just one more thing… I cleared my throat. “Uh, Garrett? Is there a good place to get a haircut around here?”
He looked up, an understanding smile on his face. He grabbed the phone next to him and hit one button. “I need a favor…”
***
Ten minutes later and Landry and I were sitting side by side in the Nordstrom’s salon. I didn’t even know Nordstrom’s had a damn salon. Landry looked a little nervous. “Have you ever had a haircut before?”
She nodded her head. “Sometimes my mom would cut my hair.”
I had a million questions for this kid. I wanted to know about her mom, I wanted to know how she survived an obviously hard childhood. But at the same time, I was afraid to ask. Afraid to know what she’d had to endure. “Well, this will be a lot like that. Only better. They are going to wash our hair, and then cut it, and then blow-dry it. Is that okay?”
She nodded again.
“After we’re done here, we’re going to go pick up a friend of mine from the airport. Her name is Bryan and she is really nice. She’s Dylan’s sister.”
“Is she your girlfriend?”
“No. She’s just my friend…”
Landry spun her chair around in a circle. “Is she pretty like Dylan?”
I smiled. “She’s pretty like you.” That wasn’t a lie. Bryan and Landry could be related. I loved that she was talking to me right now. I loved the way she was spinning in her chair. Even if it was just this small moment in time, she seemed happy.
Landry looked up at me, humor in her eyes. “You think I’m pretty?”
I nodded. “Yes. I think you are probably the prettiest little girl I’ve ever met.” I leaned forward. “Good genetics.”
“Are you my dad?”
Stomach, meet floor. Apparently she knew what genetics meant… What did I say to that? Probably? “Well, your mom thinks I’m your dad. And you look an awful lot like me. Although you’re smarter and stronger than I am…” I shrugged.
“My mom lies a lot.” She said it without emotion. Like it was just a fact.
Chapter Four
Bryan
I was nervous when I saw Jacks’s car pull up to the curb, my stomach was in knots but I was smiling like a crazy person. I talked to this guy daily, but I hadn’t seen him in weeks. He opened the door and came around the front, throwing his arms around my waist and picking me up. “I am so fucking glad you are here, doll.” He looked good in his jeans and tight vintage Pantera shirt. He looked good period.
His dark brown hair was tickling my neck but I didn’t want to let him go. I just wanted to stay like this, wrapped in his toned arms. “Is it weird to say that I’ve missed you?” My words slipped out before I could stop them.
He pulled me back by the shoulders, grinning. “Hell no. I’ve missed you too.” He hugged me to him one more time, placed sloppy kisses on both my cheeks and then grabbed the bag out of my hand. “Landry fell asleep a few minutes ago.” He loaded my stuff into the trunk of his black Tesla as I climbed into the front seat.
I was careful to shut my door quietly so I didn’t wake her. I turned in my seat to look at her. “Jacks, she’s beautiful.” And she was with her dark hair, olive skin, and tiny features.
“I think so.” He checked his mirrors and then glanced at me. “I think she looks a little like you and Dylan.”
I turned again, studying her sleeping face. “Yeah. I guess she does.” I took my phone out. I had two texts from Shep asking me where I was. I fired off a quick vague explanation and then put my phone away. “What did you do today? With her, I mean.”
“I took her shopping and then we got haircuts and went to lunch.” He lowered his voice. “She doesn’t talk to me all that much.”
I reached out and touched his arm. “She’s got to be terrified right now. You know that, right?”
He nodded. “I know. I am too.”
I couldn’t imagine what either of them was going through. I knew him; Jacks woke up this morning without a care in the world. And now he had a daughter. And Landry? Who knew how many worries and fears this kid lived with daily? “Did she say anything about her mom?”
“Other than the fact that her mom lies a lot? Not really.”
“Do you think she lied about…?” I let my words trail off. I didn’t want to voice it out loud, afr
aid that Landry wasn’t actually sleeping.
Jacks shook his head. “No? I don’t know.” He adjusted his rearview mirror so he could see her. “She looks like me. And, I know it sounds weird, but sometimes I just get this feeling when I’m looking at her…this feeling in my chest.”
His words made me smile; he was so sweet. And he didn’t even realize it, no one did. “What now?”
He let out a small chuckle. “I have no idea, baby doll.” He reached for my hand. “But now that you’re here, I feel like I’ll be able to figure it out.”
We were both silent for a while after that, letting those words settle between us. Was that why he wanted me here? He wanted me to help him figure it out? Jacks and I had become so close over the past few weeks. I would skip out on parties and blow off dates with Shep just to talk to him. He made me laugh; he made me…happy. I loved being his friend, but I didn’t know the first thing about being a parent. Jacks lived a crazy indulgent life. He partied and drank and stayed out all night. He cussed and talked about fucking like it was nothing. I started to laugh, and once I started I couldn’t seem to stop. It was one of those manic inappropriate laughing episodes.
Jacks flicked his gaze to me. “What?”
I shook my head, waving his question off with my hand. I snorted.
He started to chuckle. “What is so damn funny?”
“You have a daughter. And she’s beautiful.” I snorted again, pointing at him. “You are such a bad, bad boy and you treat women terribly. And now you have a little girl.”
He let go of my hand and grabbed my thigh, tickling me. “You are the worst best friend in the history of best friends. I asked you here to help me, not point out the fu…fudging obvious.”
“I know what fudging really means.”
I smiled at the sweet sound of Landry’s small voice and turned in my seat. “Jacks has a horrible potty mouth.” I held out my hand, “My name is Bryan.”
She sat forward and put her tiny hand in mine. “I’m Landry.”
