Lexi and Gabe went with Savvy’s mother to drive Savvy to the hospital, where she was taken in for stitches.
Lexi sat in a chair in the waiting room. She was having a hard time breathing again. Savvy was going to be okay, but what if she hadn’t been? What if she’d been killed? Fear tumbled onto Lexi like a pile of dirt that threatened to bury her alive.
There were no guarantees. She’d learned that lesson only too well. In fact, given her bad luck, Savvy probably would die in the near future. Everyone connected with Lexi seemed to have some sort of taint.
Lexi could bear no more. When Gabe was getting a drink, she walked out of the hospital and into the night. She didn’t know where she was going, but she knew she’d made a serious mistake searching out Savvy. Lexi didn’t want to live with her anymore. She didn’t want to start caring about her and then lose her. She simply couldn’t.
Numbly, she walked down the sidewalk, losing first one shoe and then the other. Who cared? The stilettos were stupid anyway. Tears rolled out of her eyes. It was time for a new plan, but she didn’t know what.
“Lexi!”
She looked over and saw Tyler coming toward her. She felt a rush of gratitude at seeing him.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yeah. I didn’t get hurt. Just Savvy.” Her voice broke on Savvy’s name, but he didn’t appear to notice.
“I’m sorry.”
“She called you?”
“She asked her mother to. Thought you might want to hang out with me for a while.”
“Thanks.”
“Shall we pull up some grass?”
Smiling despite herself, Lexi stepped onto the grass. She sat down, tugging her skirt down to cover her legs as much as possible. Why did I ever cut this stupid skirt? she thought. But it was too late now. Some things couldn’t be fixed. She was glad it was dark outside.
“She’s going to be fine, you know.”
“I know.”
“So did you have a nice time tonight?” He pulled out a piece of grass.
Lexi shrugged. “Not really.”
They were quiet a long moment and then he said, “What about your dad? Did Savvy talk to him yet?”
“No.”
He groaned. “You have to go back–you know that, don’t you?”
Lexi’s eyes met his. “Why?”
“Because you’re a minor. And because problems don’t go away until we face them.”
An idea came to Lexi suddenly, like a bright light. “I could live with you.” This new idea made a lot of sense. She and Tyler had a lot in common. They both loved words and books and gazing at puffy clouds in the sky. They both liked to fish and ski.
Did Savvy like those things, too?
It didn’t matter, not if she were setting her sights on Tyler for a guardian. Now that she thought about it, his family was perfect. She would have grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins, but they wouldn’t really be related, so if things didn’t work out, or if someone died, it wouldn’t make much difference. Her heart wouldn’t have another hole.
“Live with me?” He studied her as though trying to gauge her motives. “Why would you think of that?”
“Your brother and sister took in kids, so why not you? I wouldn’t be a lot of trouble.” She leaned forward, pleading with her eyes. “I can cook, I can do laundry, and I know how to get myself to school. I’m never sick–well, almost never.”
“What about your father?”
“He won’t be a problem. Not when . . . well, I’ll find a way.”
“What about Savvy? Did you think of her?”
Lexi dropped her eyes to the ground. She couldn’t tell him her real reason for not wanting to live with Savvy because he would tell her it was silly and that Savvy wasn’t going to die. But how could he promise that? “She’s going to make me go back.”
“Not if your father’s abusive. She’ll help you–I promise you that.”
“Do you always keep your promises?”
Tyler thought it a strange question from this young girl. “Yes,” he said quietly. “I do my best.”
“And Savvy?”
“Always.”
Too bad Savvy couldn’t promise her the one thing she wanted.
A few seconds passed in silence. “Come on. Let’s go see what’s happening,” Tyler said. “They should be finished in there by now. I’ll give you both a ride back to Sandy.”
* * *
Later that night, Lexi lay in her bed curled in a tight ball. The youth activity had been awful and the accident even worse. After Tyler had driven them home, she’d run up to her room to change, wadding up the black skirt and throwing it under the bed. She would have chopped it to bits with her scissors, but she was too tired. At least Savvy hadn’t tried to get her father’s information from her.
When Savvy knocked at the door to ask if she wanted a snack since they’d eaten dinner so early, Lexi pretended to be asleep. She had fallen asleep for real soon after, and when she awoke it was dark. Her stomach grumbled from lack of food, but she didn’t want to eat. She felt sick. The day’s memories were too clear, too awful. Maybe she was dying from some terrible stomach disease. It was entirely possible.
Her face felt hot. She climbed from the bed and stood at the window, pushing it open to feel if there was a breeze. There was, and the cool air felt good against her burning skin. Her stomach grumbled again.
After a while, she tiptoed downstairs to the kitchen, stopping on the way to make sure Savvy’s even breathing came from the other upstairs room. By the light weaving through the kitchen window above the sink, she could see Muffin lying by the back door, curled up close to the turtle. Lexi would have laughed at the sight, if she hadn’t felt so despondent. The dog and turtle knew where they belonged better than she did.
In the kitchen she found leftover chicken wraps from dinner. By the light of the open refrigerator, she downed two cold, straight from the pan with her fingers. Her stomach felt almost immediately better. Maybe she wasn’t dying after all.
Lexi wiped her hand on a rag in the sink and reached for the phone on the counter. She quickly dialed the number of the cell phone she’d left with Amber.
“Hello?” the answering voice was scarcely a whisper. “Why are you calling so late? My parents might hear! Never mind. I’m just glad you called.”
A lump rose in Lexi’s throat. She missed Amber dreadfully. Amber loved her no matter what she wore. “Is everything okay?” Lexi asked.
“So far. But I’ve been wondering–what about school? I bet they’ve been calling your house. It’s only a matter of time before they talk to your dad or he gets a message.”
Lexi hadn’t thought of that. “You’ll have to write a note for them.”
“Me? Lex, I could get expelled! I thought you were coming back. What about your dad?”
“Not yet,” Lexi said. Silent tears began down her cheeks. “I think I might have made a mistake. Maybe I don’t belong here, either.” As she said the words, she understood why she had felt the impending doom today and why she hadn’t been able to breathe at church. Not because of the stares, not because of the whispering and giggles, but because of Savvy. Lexi was going to lose Savvy–she could feel it. No matter what, Savvy would be gone. It was only a matter of time. That was why she had to convince Tyler to let her stay with him.
Amber was quiet a long moment. “Are you okay, Lex? Maybe we should tell my mom. I bet she’d help. Please, Lex–you’re scaring me.”
“I’m fine.” Lexi wiped the tears from her face. “But I’m not coming back. Not yet. I need to see if they really want me. I mean . . .” Lexi shut her eyes. She didn’t know if she could bear to have come this far only to end up in Minnesota after all, away from all that she loved.
“I’m sorry,” Amber said. “Really sorry. I’ll do what I can, okay?”
“Thanks. You’re the only person I can trust. I can’t tell you how awful the kids here are.” A creaking noise made Lexi fall silent, h
er heart thundering in her ears. But it was only the house settling, or maybe the dog by the door. “Well,” she said. “I’d better go.”
“Okay, but call again soon.” With a soft click, Amber was gone.
Lexi replaced the phone. She felt alone in the dark kitchen. Not like last night when Savvy–her sister–had comforted her. What would it have been like to grow up with Savvy? Or what if Brenton had been a girl? What if he were with her now?
Tears were coming faster now. Brenton, she thought, I need you.
But he was far away. Too far for him to care anymore what she thought or felt. Her stomach began aching again.
With a little whine, Muffin left his place by the turtle. He stretched briefly, his mouth opening in a funny-looking yawn that brought a tiny smile to Lexi’s face. He rubbed against her, inviting her to touch his fur, and Lexi scratched him vigorously. His eyes rolled in his head with doggy bliss.
“Okay, that’s enough,” she said at last, but he followed her upstairs and jumped into her bed as though he belonged. Lexi curled her hands in his fur and closed her eyes to sleep.
Chapter Seventeen
On Thursday, Tyler knocked on the front door of his brother’s house in Sandy. He knew he should probably wait for Savvy to call, but he couldn’t seem to stay away from her. He had been surprised and grateful that she had asked her mother to call him last night after the accident, even if it was only to be with Lexi–probably to make sure she didn’t take off. Of course, there had been no time for private talk with Savvy, but at least he’d shown that he was willing to be there for her when she needed him.
But what excuse can I use for coming this morning? he thought. Hmm, I could use their help with Kerrianne’s fence, if they’re not doing anything. That should keep Lexi out of trouble.
Of course Savvy and Lexi probably had other, more important plans. Like talking to Savvy’s birth father. Knowing her as he did, Tyler knew she had to be torn up inside about what might happen at that meeting. Well, he was going to be there for her, whether she liked it or not.
No one came to the door. After the third time ringing the doorbell, Tyler began to wonder where they were. Savvy didn’t have a car since her mother’s had to be repaired, so where could they be? Had one of her sisters come and picked her up? He couldn’t just enter the house with his spare key. What if they were there but not dressed? Finally, he went around to the side gate and let himself into the backyard. Almost immediately he heard raised voices.
“You promised,” Savvy was saying as he rounded the house. She wore jeans and a light pink top that emphasized the flushed color of her cheeks. “I gave you until yesterday, and that is long over.”
“I changed my mind.” Lexi’s voice was sullen and angry. The girl was still in pajamas–oversized pants and a snug T-shirt.
“Well, I’m sorry, but you can’t change your mind. We have to clear this up. It’s already gone on too long. You can’t keep running away.”
“I’m not running away!”
“Oh, then why do you want all that money?”
“You promised you’d give it to me whenever I asked!”
“Lexi, talk to me!”
“My father is horrible!” Lexi shouted. “You don’t know how he is. You don’t know what he does to me!”
“Because you won’t tell me! But if he’s as horrible as you say, we have to tell someone.”
“I want my money.”
Savvy blew out a frustrated breath. “Fine, we’ll go get it–right after we stop by the police station.”
“You wouldn’t!”
“You leave me no choice.”
“Just give me my money. I’ll go back home by myself.”
Savvy frowned, her smooth forehead wrinkling. “So,” she said, her voice deceptively calm, “you show up on my doorstep, turn my life upside down, not to mention all the hinting around about the way your father treats you, and now you expect that I’ll just let you walk away and forget you ever existed?” She folded her arms over her chest, a sure sign she was sticking her ground. “I’m sorry, Lexi, but it’s gone too far for that–way too far. I may not be what you expected, but like it or not, I’m your sister, and I care about you. I’m not letting you leave alone. You’re only thirteen.”
“I can take care of myself!” Lexi retorted. “Been doing it a long time before I met you.”
“But you don’t have to do it alone anymore.”
“I don’t need you!”
Tears filled Savvy’s eyes, and her fists clenched tight at the ends of her folded arms. “I’m going to help you even if you don’t want me to. Now,” she said, her voice still measured but showing strain, “you’d better get dressed. We’ve got a long day ahead of us.”
Lexi stalked to the door, mumbling under her breath. When she was gone, Savvy sat at the picnic table and put her head in her hands. Tyler approached with slow steps, clearing his throat softly to make her aware of his presence. She looked up, and for a brief, unguarded instant, Tyler saw that she was happy to see him. Then her mask fell back in place, the mask that severed him from her heart as surely as with a cleaver.
“Hi.” Her voice was soft and her eyes bright, bluer than the sky above. “What’s up?”
“Huh?” He was having a hard time hearing past the sudden pounding in his ears as his heart reacted to her closeness.
A smile played around her lips. “I said, ‘what’s up?’ ”
He gave a quick shake of his head. “I came to see how–I heard what happened with Lexi.”
Savvy’s smile vanished. “I don’t know what I can do if she won’t give me details about her father’s whereabouts. I’ve been planning to take her to the police, but . . .” She chewed on her bottom lip and sighed. “I wish my father were home from Japan. He has connections. I wonder if I could hire someone to track Derek down.”
“Your mother might have a number to reach your dad in Japan.” Tyler sat down with her. “I have a few researching skills myself. It’s one of the first things you learn as a reporter. Have you tried the Internet?”
She nodded. “I used your computer to do a general search on the white pages. Nothing so far that looks like it could match, though there are a few Roathes with an initial D. I guess I’ll have to contact them all. I wish I knew who she’d called that first night in California.”
“Has she tried to use the phone here?”
“No. We’ve been together most of the time. I can’t imagine when she might have used it.”
“That’s too bad. If she had, we could check the phone records.” As he said the words, something touched at the edges of his mind like a whisper he couldn’t quite hear. He recognized it as belonging to his gut instinct, one that had led him to more than a few juicy stories. He let his mind trail after the whisper. It was almost clear . . .
“Well, I’m going around to the front,” Savvy said, standing abruptly. “I’ve learned that Lexi tends to run away when things don’t go her way.” She brushed invisible dust from the legs of her jeans.
“Give me a few hours before you call your dad,” he said, following her around the side of the house. “I’ll see what I can do. In fact, I was thinking maybe you and Lexi could come over to Kerrianne’s to help me paint. Or at least Lexi could help, if you don’t want to. I could get her started and then can make a few calls to some friends, get a few searches going. Painting will keep her busy while I nose around a bit.”
Savvy thought for a moment. “That’ll work. I can help paint.”
“Are you sure you’re feeling up to it? With the stitches and all, I mean.”
Her fingers went to her head, gingerly touching a spot just above her ear. Her long hair covered the four stitches, but he knew they were there. She gave a self-deprecating laugh. “Frankly, painting sounds a lot better than making a decision right now.”
“Is that because of your birth father or Lexi?” he asked.
She shrugged delicately, but her step faltered.
“Tell
me,” he urged.
She shook her head. “It’s stupid, really.”
“Try me.”
They had come to the front of the house, and she sat down on the steps while he stood on the walk, partially leaning on the wrought iron railing. “While I was growing up, I’d think of him,” she said, her voice so low he had to strain to hear. “I wondered why he gave me up, why he didn’t at least call. My mom tried to explain that he’d done it for me, but I didn’t really believe her. I wanted to know what was so wrong with me that he couldn’t love me, that he gave me away.”
The familiar expression on her face was back, the one he’d recognized before but couldn’t put a name to. Suddenly, he understood. Fear of rejection. She had been rejected by her birth father once before, and she feared it would happen again. Yet, the other night she’d had that same expression when there had only been the two of them–they hadn’t even been discussing her father at the time. His mind traveled to the inevitable end of the trail. Perhaps it wasn’t only her father’s rejection she feared but Tyler’s.
The realization was unthinkable. Never in a million years had he wanted to cause Savvy pain. I’ve been so blind! “I’m sorry,” he said, though the words were less than adequate.
“I had the best father in the world,” she replied. “Whatever else happened, Derek Roathe gave me that.”
“No, I meant . . .” He squatted on the walk until his head was even with hers. “Okay, let’s go back to him for a moment. He didn’t reject you. It had nothing to do with you.”
“It had everything to do with me. He and Mom got divorced, yes, but he didn’t have to give me up. He chose to do that. He had other children who replaced me. I know I had a better life because of it–Lexi’s proof of that–but it still hurts. And guess what? I don’t know if I even want to see him after all these years.” She let her eyes drop to his shoes. “Well, that’s not exactly true. Honestly, I think maybe I’m glad this has all happened because deep down, I’m still curious about him. I hate it, but I am.”
“That’s natural. And I think it’s something you have to follow through on. Especially now, for Lexi.”
“Maybe you’re right.” She smiled, though she kept her gaze lowered.
Huntington Family Series Page 77
