by Kylie Keene
I wake up at 7 when I hear the alarm on my phone go off. “Brad, I have to get up. My plane leaves in a few hours.”
“What time is it?” He rubs his eyes, then stretches a little. He even looks hot first thing in the morning. I’m sure I look like a total mess, hair sticking out, makeup smeared all over my face.
“It’s 7,” I tell him. ‘When does your plane leave?”
“At 11. I can take you to the airport. I have to drop the car off early anyway.”
“Thanks. That’d be great. I should start packing.” I get up, but he pulls me back into his arms.
“So what do you think?”
“About what?”
He smiles and runs his hand up and down my arm. “About this thing we started here. I kind of don’t want it to end. I really like you, Morgan.”
I smile back. “I like you, too.”
“Then what should we do?”
“What do you mean?”
“How do we keep this going? You and me?”
I sit up. “We can’t. The long-distance thing never works.”
“You never know until you try.” His smile appears again and for a moment I’m tempted to really do this. To try to date him even though he’ll be halfway across the country.
But then reality wakes me from my fantasyland and I realize there’s no way I can do this. I can’t do the long-distance dating thing. Now that my dad’s moving on, I’m trying to get out more and do stuff and I won’t do anything if I’m sitting at home every night calling my boyfriend in Portland. I need someone I can see every day. Someone to go out with on a regular basis. And I might already have that someone. I have Grant. Just last week I’d declared him my dream man so what am I doing with Brad?
I get off the bed and stand next to it. “You’re moving to Portland, Brad. It just won’t work.”
He nods. “Yeah. Okay. I understand.”
He doesn’t seem mad. He probably figured I’d say that. He gets up and goes over to the table and picks up his phone.
“But I at least need your number.” He holds his hand over the phone. “What is it?”
I hesitate. Do I give him my number? It seems like I shouldn’t. If I start dating Grant, he won’t want some other guy calling me all the time.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Why isn’t it a good idea? Do you have a boyfriend or something?”
“No, not really. But I did go out on a date with a guy last week and I’m going out with him again when I get back.”
“Then I guess I shouldn’t have spent the night here.” He glances down at his phone, swiping the screen.
“I’m not serious with this guy. It’s just that it might go somewhere in the future and he probably wouldn’t like some other guy calling me.”
“We can still be friends, Morgan. I’m not trying to force you to date me. I just want to talk to you again. So what’s your number?”
“I can’t give it to you. I’m sorry.” I feel sick breaking off all communication with Brad like this, but I don’t know what else to do. I have to give Grant a chance, a guy who actually lives in the same town as me. And I’ll never give Grant a chance if I keep this thing going with Brad. I like Brad way too much to stay in touch with him, even as friends. It’ll be hard enough getting him out of my head.
“You really won’t give me your number?” he asks.
“No. I’m sorry.”
He nods and puts his phone away and walks to the door. “I’ll come by and get you in an hour.”
I can tell he’s annoyed with me and I feel bad for rejecting him, but I don’t want to lead him on. If I’m not pursuing this, I need to end it now. But I really don’t want to, which is why I’m feeling so conflicted.
I’m not very good at trusting my feelings. I let my head take over and tell me what to do and right now, it’s telling me to go out with Grant and forget about Brad. But my heart? It’s telling me to hold on. To not let Brad just disappear from my life. To at least be friends with him, get to know him.
It’s not very often you meet people that you click with right away. That instant connection that can’t be put into words. That’s what I felt with Brad last Saturday night when we sat in that diner and talked. And that connection kept getting stronger the more time I spent with him.
My head tells me that maybe it isn’t a connection at all. Maybe I feel this way because Brad was the only familiar face in this city I’ve never been to. The only person who went out of his way to be friendly to me.
As much as I try to rationalize why I feel this way about Brad, it doesn’t change the fact that the feelings are still there. And I can’t have those feelings if I want to start something with Grant. I need a clean break from Brad and that means no phone calls, no friendship.
On the ride to the airport, Brad avoids any mention of our earlier talk and sticks to safe topics like the traffic and the weather. When we reach the terminal, he gets my luggage from the trunk and sets it on the curb.
“It was good seeing you again.” He gives me a hug. Not a quick hug, but an I-wish-this-wasn’t-goodbye-forever hug.
I feel the same way and it makes me start to regret my decision. But I can’t change my mind. I made a decision and I need to stick to it.
“Bye, Brad. Thanks for taking care of me the past few days. I would’ve spent the whole time in my hotel room if you weren’t around.”
“Sure.” He half smiles, then stands there looking at me like he’s hoping I’ll change my mind at the last minute.
But I don’t. I turn and walk away and when I glance back, he’s already gone.
I go in the airport and check in. As I sit at the gate, waiting for my flight, I try to put my focus on Grant, the guy who’s waiting for me back home. But all I can think about is Brad, the guy I basically told to get lost, but the guy who just might’ve been Mr. Right.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
14
My plane is delayed due to weather in the Midwest. I’m guessing Brad is stuck here, too. I check the departure board and confirm that his plane is delayed. I consider going to meet him at his gate because I already miss him and want to see him again, but I’m sure he doesn’t want to see me after I blew him off like that. Plus, we already said our goodbyes and it sucked and I don’t want to do it again.
By early afternoon, I finally get on my flight. When I arrive in Minneapolis, I check my phone and find a message from Kayla. She says that she and Paige are coming over to my apartment at 7. I’m exhausted but I don’t bother telling them no. Kayla wouldn’t listen anyway. She thinks I had sex last night and she wants to hear all about it.
They arrive at my apartment right on time, which is unusual for Kayla but she thinks she’s showing up for a night of virgin sex tales so there’s no way she’d be late.
“Welcome back, my little deflowered friend.” She bursts past the door as soon as I open it, carrying a bottle of wine. Paige follows, looking tired and like she still doesn’t feel well.
Kayla searches through my kitchen drawers for a corkscrew. “Let’s open this and get started.”
“Bottom left drawer,” I tell her. “Glasses are in the cabinet.” I don’t feel like drinking but I’m sure Kayla will finish off the bottle.
Paige takes a seat on the couch. “I hope the conference wasn’t too boring.”
“Boring? She got laid,” Kayla yells from the kitchen. “I’d hardly call that boring.” She comes back with the bottle of wine and two glasses. “Paige can’t drink. She’s loaded up on whatever drugs they gave her for her illness. So it’s just you and me.”
“I don’t feel like having any. You go ahead.”
“Morgan, this is a celebration! Come on.”
“I’m too tired. I only got a few hours of sleep last night.”
Kayla stops pouring the wine and sets the bottle on the table. “Are you telling me you did it all night? After your first time?”
Paige looks concerned. “Weren’t you sore? After t
he first time, most girls are—”
“I wasn’t up doing it all night, okay? We didn’t do anything. I’m still a virgin.”
Kayla sighs. “You chickened out?”
“No. I was all ready to go but he turned me down.”
“He turned you down?” Paige asks. “Did he say why?”
“He must be gay,” Kayla says. “Or married. Or maybe he has a girlfriend.”
“No, it’s none of that. He just—he said I’m too nice of a girl. He said it was too soon.”
“He’s definitely gay.” Kayla sits back and sips her wine.
“He’s not gay. I told you how he slept with half the girls in my high school. And who knows how many in college.”
“I think that is so romantic,” Paige says dreamily.
Kayla gives her a strange look. “Sleeping with half the girls in her high school is romantic?”
“No! The fact that he wouldn’t do it with her because he thinks she’s nice.”
“That’s not normal.” Kayla sips her wine again. “No guy turns down sex with a girl unless he’s gay.”
“That’s not true,” Paige insists. “Maybe for the guys you date, but—”
“Okay, stop,” I say. “He’s not gay. We kissed and trust me, he’s not gay.”
Kayla swirls the wine in her glass. “Gay guys can kiss a girl. That doesn’t prove anything.”
“He’s not gay! Would you stop saying that? He’s just a nice guy. He’s smart. Really hot. And funny. He had to wear this ape costume at his company’s booth and—”
“Hold on.” Kayla’s staring at me. “So you just kissed? But you were up all night?”
“We made out, then watched some movies and fell asleep. It was the best date I’ve ever been on. Actually, the night we went out for Italian food might’ve been my best date ever.” I consider it. “No, I think it’s a tie. Did I tell you about the Italian restaurant? They had the most delicious meatballs I’ve ever had. And we were there so long that the staff had to practically kick us out and then we took a—”
“Morgan.” Paige stops me.
“What?” I prop my feet up on the coffee table.
“I think you might be in love with this guy.”
I roll my eyes. “I’m not in love with him. I just met him. Well, I knew him in high school but I didn’t really talk to him back then.”
“Morgan, I’m serious. I can tell when people are in love. It’s like a gift I have. Really. I have an excellent track record. I’ve been right 100%. You can ask any of my friends. I’m not kidding.”
Kayla laughs. “So tell me Miss Fortune Teller of Love, am I in love with anyone?”
Paige smiles. “You’re falling in love with someone.”
“You’re nuts. I’m not falling in love with anyone. I never will.” She gulps her wine. “Love is for sappy idiots who like the boredom that comes with marriage and kids and having sex with the same person over and over again for the next 50 years.”
“You can say that all you want, but I know you don’t really believe that.” Paige is still smiling. “You just need the right person to break you out of your cynical shell. And you’ve already met him so watch out.”
Kayla puts her wine glass down. “What are you a witch or something? You’re starting to scare me. You seem to think you really know this stuff. And if that’s true, then who is this mystery man who’s going to sweep me off my feet?”
Paige smiles, smugly. “You’ll find out soon enough.”
Kayla shakes her head. “You just made all that up.”
“I didn’t make it up. And going back to Morgan, I can tell she’s in love with this guy.”
“Sorry, Paige,” I say, “but your love radar is off. A person can’t fall in love in four days.”
“Sure they can. When two souls are a match, it’s like they recognize each other and there’s this instant connection.”
Kayla stares at her. “Where are you coming up with this stuff? Are you high? It must be those drugs they gave you. They’re making you delusional.”
“So if I’m in love with him,” I say to Paige, playing along with her. “Does that mean he’s also in love with me?”
“Not necessarily. But given the circumstances, it sounds like he is.”
“What do you mean?”
“This should be good,” Kayla mutters.
Paige ignores her. “If this guy wouldn’t sleep with you, that’s a sign that he loves you. If a guy sees a woman as his future wife, he doesn’t want to sleep with her right away, like he has with all the girls in his past. You’re different. He wants to wait and make it special.”
Kayla is now pretend gagging. “Can we please end this now before I vomit?”
“He’s not in love,” I say to Paige. “He was just being a gentleman. Like I said, he’s grown up a lot since high school.”
“So back in high school, you never went out with him, right?” Paige has this quizzical look that almost makes me laugh.
“No, but he did say he had a crush on me back then. He was just too afraid to ask me out.”
“So he’s been pining for you all these years.” Paige says it like she’s solving a mystery.
“Pining?” Kayla refills her wine glass. “I swear, Paige, sometimes I think you came here in a time machine from the fifties.”
“And then fate stepped in,” Paige continues, “and brought you two together.”
“At a whole grain conference,” Kayla says. “Yeah, that’s so romantic.”
Paige sits up straighter to explain her theory. “Just think about it, Morgan. I was supposed to go to that conference. But then I just happened to get sick. I never get sick! And then you went in my place. It’s fate intervening. Putting you in the right place at the right time. No wonder you love this guy. It was meant to be!”
“Okay, I’ve had enough.” Kayla gets up. “I’m gonna head out. I came here for tales from the virgin, not tales from the mystic love witch.” She sets her glass on the table. “I’ll see you guys later.”
We tell her goodbye and when Kayla’s gone, Paige says, “She must’ve been hurt really bad in the past. She refuses to accept anything remotely resembling love from a guy. If they even try to get close to her, she runs. That’s why she keeps dating those losers who only want sex.”
“I don’t know what her deal is. She never talks about her past.”
“So what are you going to do about Grant now that you have this new guy?”
“I’m still going out with Grant. I’m not dating that other guy. He just got a job in Portland. I told him I couldn’t do the long-distance thing.”
“So how did you leave it?”
“We just said goodbye. That was it. I didn’t give him my phone number and I didn’t take his. I don’t want to keep something going that has no future. Besides I need to focus on Grant. He’s good-looking. He has a great job. He’s smart and sophisticated. He’s just what I’m looking for. Plus he’s here in town and he seems to like me.”
“But your face lights up when you talk about the Boston guy. You have this whole different energy about you.”
I laugh. “Okay, now you’re taking this love witch thing too far, Paige.”
She sighs. “I’m not a witch. I just get a feeling about this stuff. You’ll see. Talk to me in a few weeks after you’ve had some time with Grant. You might change your mind and decide to date this other guy instead.”
“I’m not dating someone who lives halfway across the country, so it’s not gonna happen. I’m sorry but your love meter, or whatever it is, is off this time.”
“I need to go.” She gets up and puts her coat on. “Morgan, I’m glad you didn’t do it when you were in Boston. You shouldn’t rush it. You should wait for the right time. I know you think you’ll be waiting forever if you do that, but you won’t. Trust me. You’ll know when it’s time.” She starts to leave, then stops. “I waited. And I’ve been only been with Michael.”
“What are you talking about? Y
ou told us you did it with three other guys.”
“Because I didn’t want Kayla to know the truth. But I lied about the other guys. Back when I was dating, I never followed that third-date rule. A lot of my friends did, but it never felt right for me. So I waited. I didn’t wait until I was married, but I waited until I knew Michael was the one. I wanted to be sure I had the right guy. I’m not saying you have to do what I did. I’m just saying not to let Kayla or anyone else make you feel pressured into doing something you aren’t ready to do.”
“I’ll think about it.” I walk her to the door.
“Don’t tell Kayla what I said.”
“I won’t. It’s our little secret.”
After Paige leaves, Grant calls. He asks me how my flight was, then tells me what’s been going on at work. I find my mind wandering, thinking about Brad and wondering if he made it back to Chicago and what he’s doing right now. My mind is so consumed with him, I start to think Paige put some type of spell on me with her love voodoo.
“Are you still there?” I hear Grant ask.
“Yes, I’m here.”
“I have to work late tomorrow but what about Friday night? Do you want to try that new sushi place?”
I’ve never had sushi, but just the idea of it makes me feel sick. But I agree to go. I need to try new things. I told myself I was going to be adventurous and for me, eating sushi is high on the adventurous scale.
Dating Grant will be good for me. He and I have different interests and going out with him will open up my world to all kinds of new experiences, which is just what I need.
Who knows what I’ll find out about myself? Maybe I’ll discover that I love sushi. Maybe I’ll start running with him and come to like it. Maybe he can teach me how to cook.
I just need to get my mind off Brad and back on Grant. And once I do, I think Grant might be my dream man after all.
***
The next two days at work are a complete nightmare. I have nonstop meetings and I’m behind on everything. By Friday night, I’m so tired I just want to go home and sleep. But I don’t want to cancel on Grant. He seems really excited about this new restaurant.
