by Jenna Black
“I didn’t mean it the way you’re making it sound!” Saul protested. “I wasn’t ever going to suggest we kill anyone.”
Raphael raised an eyebrow. “Then why did you suddenly become so shy?”
The glow was back in Saul’s eyes. “I just started thinking about all the logistical issues with capturing a hostile demon and holding it still long enough for an illegal exorcism.”
Raphael nodded. “And following that thought to its logical conclusion—which is it would be a hell of a lot easier to just kill the host.”
“No!” Saul shouted. He leapt to his feet and lunged after Raphael, who remained seated.
Adam had apparently been on the lookout for such an eventuality, for he managed to grab hold of Saul before he reached Raphael. Saul then whirled on Adam with a snarl, which Adam didn’t seem to appreciate. They grabbed each other’s shirts, both sets of eyes blazing now. I flinched, sure one of them was about to hit the other and then all hell would break loose.
Moving slowly and carefully, Dominic sidled up to them and put one hand on each man’s shoulder. “Let’s take it down a notch, shall we?” he said, his voice low and gentle.
They both turned to look at him. If it had been me, I’d have let go and backpedaled. Saul and Adam were both scary-looking when they were mad. But Dom wasn’t intimidated by either of them, and he didn’t back down.
“It’s not each other you’re mad at,” Dom reminded them.
Raphael still hadn’t risen from his chair, and now he released a little breath of air that may have been a choked-off laugh. “Gee, thanks, Dominic. Sic them both on me.”
By now, I’d had enough. “Everyone sit down and shut up! I’m not in the mood to deal with all this macho chest-pounding bullshit.”
Dominic smiled at me. “Always the diplomat.”
I shrugged. “Your way wasn’t working.”
Adam and Saul let go of each other’s shirts and moved apart. Saul seemed to have regained his composure, but Adam bared his teeth at Dominic.
“Don’t ever get between two angry demons again!” he snapped.
Dom wasn’t any more intimidated now than he had been before. “I wasn’t between you,” he said mildly.
“Listen to Adam, bud,” Saul said as he returned to his seat. “We couldn’t have hurt each other if we’d tried. Not really. You, on the other hand …”
Dom dismissed that with a wave of his hand. “You wouldn’t have hurt me.”
“Not on purpose,” Saul agreed.
I suppose Dom got the point, because he didn’t argue anymore.
Saul grinned. “I’m sure Adam will ‘explain’ the error of your ways later,” he said with a waggle of his brows. Then he looked at Adam. “Give him a few lines of ‘explanation’ for me while you’re at it.”
Dominic blushed and returned to his seat.
Ick. Maybe it was better when they were fighting. I didn’t voice that opinion, and I breathed a sigh of relief when everyone was again peacefully seated.
“For the record,” I said, “we’re not killing anyone. Got it?” I let my eyes roam over all of them, though I skipped right over Brian. I saw various expressions of acquiescence or annoyance, but no one contradicted me. I let my gaze rest a little extra long on Raphael. He was the loose cannon among us, the one who might disregard orders. But he just shrugged.
“So,” Adam said, “the plan is to grab the intern and do an illegal exorcism, right?”
He was looking at me, so I nodded. Then I frowned. “But if we send him back to the Demon Realm, what’s to stop him from coming right back?”
It was Raphael who answered. “The only way to stop him for sure is to kill him.”
“No!” I said. “Killing the intern is already off the table as an option. And I sure as hell am not sitting by and letting you guys burn him alive.” Which was what it took to actually kill a demon on the Mortal Plain. I had more than one gruesome death on my conscience already. I refused to entertain the idea of adding another.
“That’s the only sure thing,” Raphael repeated, then cut me off before I could light into him. “Our second-best option is to put the fear of God into him, so to speak.” He grinned and let his demon shine through his eyes.
Just the mention of Raphael’s name was enough to make most demons piss themselves in terror.
“We don’t even have to let on who’s hosting me,” Raphael continued. “You just tell him I’m your close personal friend, that you had to work hard to convince me to let you handle him this time, and that if he ever shows up on the Mortal Plain again you’ll let me have him. That ought to be some pretty strong incentive for him to butt out.”
And it was probably the only hope I had of keeping the poor intern alive. I hoped Raphael wasn’t just blowing smoke up my ass and planning to take things into his own hands no matter what I said. I was going to have to keep a very close eye on him.
“That’s as good a plan as any,” I said. “Now, if we could grab the intern before he manufactures some evidence linking me to the murder, that would be a nice bonus.”
“That could be the tricky part,” Adam agreed. “I can’t afford to be too closely involved at this point, although I can get you the name and address of the intern. We need to tread carefully. This demon obviously has some power and clout, or he wouldn’t have been able to make it back to the Mortal Plain within Morgan’s lifetime.”
I raised my eyebrows at that.
“There are a lot more demons who want to visit the Mortal Plain than there are available hosts,” Adam explained. “The waiting list is decades’ long for rank-and-file demons. The fact that he’s back so soon means he was powerful enough to pull strings and move his name way up the list.”
“A very powerful demon who has a grudge against Morgan,” Brian said, looking worried. “Is there any chance it’s Dougal?”
Raphael snorted and gave Brian a disdainful look. “Gee, wouldn’t that be convenient. Leave the safety and power of the Demon Realm to take a jaunt to the Mortal Plain where we can get our hands on him and eliminate his threat permanently.” He shook his head. “Neither of my brothers is an idiot.”
Brian’s face turned red, and in the past, I’d have jumped in to defend him. I felt no compulsion to do so now.
“Since we know the demon isn’t rank and file,” Adam continued as if his speech had never been interrupted, “we should send two demons after him.”
Raphael laughed. “Hmm. Two demons, and one of them isn’t you.” He looked at Saul and cocked an eyebrow. “Just you and me, son?”
“No,” I said emphatically. “Considering you two were about to rip each others’ throats out, I’m not sending you out together.” Listen to me, I thought, talking about this as if I were actually in charge of anything. I managed not to laugh at the idea.
“I beg to differ,” Raphael said with exaggerated politeness. “If you’ll remember, I did not leave my seat. My temper is under better control than that.”
“Enough with the needling!” I said.
“You misunderstand. My point is that, although my son and I do not get along, we aren’t in any real danger of killing each other. I can hold my temper even if Saul loses his.”
Saul looked like he was on the brink of losing his temper right this minute. However, everyone seemed to be responding to my Master of the Universe impersonation, so I fixed Saul with my most imperious look. “No encores. Stay in your seat and keep your mouth shut.”
I thought for a moment I might have a mutiny on my hands, but Saul managed to get himself back under control. None of this was exactly building my confidence that they could work together. Maybe they couldn’t actually hurt each other, but they could kill each other’s hosts if they decided to fight, and I don’t think I’d be able to survive the guilt if they did.
“Like I said,” Adam piped in, “we don’t know how powerful this demon is.”
Raphael shrugged. “He’s unlikely to be more powerful than me.”
&nb
sp; This wasn’t arrogance speaking—as part of the royal family, Raphael was one of the most powerful demons in existence.
“True, but are you powerful enough to subdue him by yourself without killing his host?”
Raphael’s face told me everything I needed to know. He couldn’t care less if the hapless intern died. In fact, he might prefer it, since that would eliminate a witness.
“You’re not going anywhere near him,” I decided. Even if he and Saul were working together, and working together well, there was no guarantee Raphael wouldn’t take matters into his own hands. And Saul wasn’t powerful enough to stop him.
“But—” Adam started to protest.
I cut him off with a slashing gesture. “I agree we need two demons. But it’s going to be Saul and Lugh.” I shivered at the idea, not exactly excited about letting Lugh take control for any length of time. It wasn’t something that would ever come easily to me.
“No,” Raphael said. “We can’t involve Lugh in something that involves risk to your person.”
I glared at him. “Having a psycho demon constantly on my ass very definitely involves risk to my person. Besides, however powerful this asshole might be, he’s just one demon. And I do have a Taser.”
Raphael crossed his arms over his chest. “Absolutely not. It’s too dangerous.”
“You’re not in charge here,” I retorted.
“Neither are you! Why don’t you ask Lugh what he thinks?”
I didn’t need to ask, because Lugh took that moment to make his opinion known.
Raphael has a point.
“But—”
But so do you. I suggest a compromise. Raphael and I together should have no trouble subduing this demon, no matter who he is. I assure you, Raphael won’t kill the host while I’m there to stop him.
I didn’t like the idea of having Raphael anywhere near the intern. He had always been a ruthless son of a bitch, and if he thought Lugh would be safer with the intern dead, I doubted he’d hesitate to make it so. Then again, there were plenty of problems with the other alternatives.
Lugh, will you promise me you won’t let him kill the intern? Lugh was a hell of a lot nicer and more compassionate than Raphael, but that didn’t mean he was an old softie. He was perfectly capable of killing if he felt the situation warranted it.
I give you my word.
I thought about it a little while, aware of the others watching me, waiting for the verdict.
“His Majesty has decided that he and Raphael will go after the intern,” I finally said.
No one looked happy with the decision, but no one was going to argue with Lugh, either.
“Adam, how long will it take you to get us a name and address?”
“The time it takes me to make one phone call.”
That didn’t leave much time for stalling, but that was probably a good thing. “Make the call.”
He didn’t seem to object to me giving orders, although he did excuse himself and duck out into the hallway to make the call. I’m not sure why. Perhaps his informant was confidential.
“I guess this meeting is adjourned,” I said, eager to get the lot of them out of my house, even if it would leave me with Raphael on my hands.
Chapter 17
I stared at the piece of paper Adam had handed me with the intern’s name and address scrawled on it. It was near Penn, not surprisingly. If I’d had a working automobile, we’d have driven there. As it was, I had to call a cab.
I was still trying my hardest not to think too much. If I did, I’d keep replaying the moment right before Brian walked out the door.
I hadn’t been able to resist reaching out to him, wishing that he would give me some reason to hope that the damage could be repaired.
“Brian, we need to—” I’d started.
“Not now,” he’d answered. “Maybe not ever.” And then he’d walked away from me once again.
I was sure Raphael was going to give me a hard time about it, poking at my open wounds. I was more relieved than I could describe when he didn’t.
We had twenty minutes to wait before the cab was due to arrive. I wasn’t all that eager to have a conversation with Raphael, but I started one anyway, with my usual tact and diplomacy.
“What did you do to my brother?” I asked, remembering once again the gaunt, haunted look on Andy’s face. He hadn’t said a single word throughout the meeting. That wasn’t like him at all.
“I didn’t do anything to him,” Raphael said.
I wanted to hit him. “You sure as hell did! Don’t lie to me.”
He let out a dramatic sigh. “Why bother to ask the question if you’re not going to believe the answer?”
Raphael had told so many lies, sometimes I wondered whether he even knew what the truth was anymore. I’d rarely, if ever, managed to get him to spit out the truth when I didn’t have him backed into some kind of corner, but that didn’t stop me from trying now.
“I’m supposed to believe it’s just a coincidence that he was fine before you took him, and now he’s a wreck since you left?” Actually, Andy hadn’t really been “fine” beforehand, but he’d been in a lot better shape than he was in now.
Raphael gave me one of his infuriating mocking smiles. “What can I say? He misses me.”
I leaned back into the cushions of my sofa and crossed my arms over my chest. If I kept my arms crossed, I wouldn’t be able to deck the son of a bitch. “If you’re going to keep pulling shit like this, then stop getting your panties in a twist when we treat you with a certain amount of…”
“Hostility?”
“That works.”
“I’m telling the truth, though I know it’s my own fault you don’t believe me. But I promised you I’d take better care of Andrew this time, and I kept my word.”
“Then why does he look like he’s the walking wounded all the time?” Andy had originally volunteered to host a demon out of the misguided desire to be a hero. He’d been a firefighter, and I know that he and Raphael together had saved many lives, even if that hadn’t been Raphael’s primary purpose, and even if they’d hated each other’s guts. Now my hero-wannabe brother barely seemed to acknowledge the existence of the rest of the human race.
I expected Raphael to make another one of his caustic remarks, but instead he looked thoughtful. Choosing which lie would entertain him most?
“Andrew’s not as strong as you are,” he finally said.
“Huh?” The words were so unexpected, I didn’t know what to make of them.
Raphael turned to face me on the sofa, his expression uncommonly grave. “You’ve had to make some really tough decisions in the last couple of months.”
“Yeah, so?”
“So you’re doing a lot better than your brother at dealing with the consequences.”
Maybe I was being dense, but I still didn’t know what he was talking about. Maybe his alternative to lying or telling the truth was just to spout nonsense.
“When you were trying to decide whether to let me take Tommy, you asked me if that’s what Andrew wanted.”
I remembered. Tommy was a violent, fanatical member of God’s Wrath and was probably one of the least willing hosts on the face of the planet. I’d had to choose between Tommy and my brother. I’d chosen my brother, though I still suffered from the guilt of that decision.
“I told you that Andrew did, indeed, want me to move into Tommy,” Raphael continued. “It was true. I was treating him better, but we still weren’t exactly best friends. He wanted me out of there desperately.”
“I can’t blame him.”
“No, but he’s pretty good at blaming himself. You’ve said it yourself—he wants to be a hero.” A little self-deprecating grin. “He wants to be as little like me as possible. But when it came right down to it, he was willing to let me move into someone he knew couldn’t cope with me in order to save his own hide.”
“Now wait just a minute!” I said indignantly.
“I’m not blaming hi
m,” Raphael said before I could really work up a head of steam. “It was perfectly understandable and very human. But he’s blaming himself, and it’s eating him up inside. He didn’t live up to his own expectations, and he’s not dealing well with the reality.”
I regarded Raphael skeptically. He was, after all, Raphael, and even when what he said sounded logical, I felt compelled to examine it for lies and deceptions.
“Remember, Morgan, whether he likes it or not, I know Andrew better than anyone in the world. Beating himself to death with guilt is one of his favorite pastimes—and it’s one of the reasons he and I clashed so badly from the very beginning.”
My lip curled even though I didn’t mean for it to. “You mean because it’s never occurred to you that you should feel guilty for anything you’ve done?”
He didn’t rise to my bait. “I feel remorse for some of my bad decisions. But no, I don’t feel guilty. There’s nothing I can do now to change what I did in the past, and there’s no point in dwelling on my inadequacies. Andrew dwells.”
I still wasn’t sure I believed he was telling me the truth. It was just so hard to know with Raphael. But it did make a kind of sense, and I did know that Andy felt guilty about what had happened.
“Is there any way I can help him?” I asked, but I think I already knew the answer.
“Not really,” Raphael said, sounding mildly regretful. “Therapy and drugs might help—if he could actually tell the therapist what was wrong, which he can’t. It’s up to him to figure out life is still worth living even if he’s not as perfect as he wants to be.”
I had to bite my tongue to restrain the retort that wanted to leap out of my throat. Raphael made it sound like it was Andy’s own fault he was miserable, proving once again how unwilling Raphael was to take responsibility for his own actions.
“It’s almost time for the cab to get here,” I said instead. Raphael took the hint, and refrained from offering any further psychoanalysis as we headed out to capture our possessed intern.
It would have been a quiet ride out to David Keller’s apartment if it weren’t for the cabbie. He was one of those garrulous, overly friendly drivers who make me want to bash their teeth in. With no encouragement from either me or Raphael, he shared his entire life history and each of the shining moments in his kids’ childhoods over the course of a fifteen-block drive. With my nerves already stretched taut by stress, it was all I could do not to commit murder before we arrived at our destination.
