by Anne Conley
He pulled back and led her by the hand to room 153, slid the card into the slot and opened the door. Renae walked inside hesitantly at first, and turned to him, her cheeks flushed red, eyes glassy with desire. He took her in his arms again, unwilling to let her go.
“Are you sure?” God, he wanted this, and didn’t want her to regret it. His conscience was saying it was a mistake to start a relationship this way, but the devil inside told him this was what she wanted.
She nodded, and his mouth crashed down on hers, trying to wipe the fear from her eyes, as he pushed her body against the wall to the bathroom. Their tongues fused in a sultry dance, and Jason was struck with a need to be her everything. Suddenly, with Renae in his arms, open and trusting, he realized what life was all about. He wanted to spend more time with her, making her feel, erasing all her fears.
But first, he was going to make her explode.
The innocence her movements exuded told him she might not have ever had the privilege with another man, and he’d be damned if he’d let this opportunity pass him by.
His control was stretched taught as a tightrope, and it was about to snap. She felt so damned good against him. His hands lifted her skirt and slipped between her thighs to feel her curls wet with her dew. She gasped when he slipped a finger inside, and Renae’s hands fumbled with his belt buckle, then his button on his pants.
Jason wanted to taste her, all of her, but he couldn’t control his hips, thrusting wildly against hers. His erection was straining against his boxers when she finally got his pants down, and he pushed his underwear down with one hand while pulling hers down with his other. He looked at her again and saw nothing but desire in her eyes. The fear was gone, thankfully. He quirked an eyebrow at her. She saw his question and nodded at him, pulling his mouth to hers again. He kissed her back, lifting her legs around his waist and entering her in one swift movement, his hand clutching her smooth, round ass.
They gasped together, the kiss momentarily broken. Jesus, she felt so good… so warm… so tight. He stilled, to allow her to adjust to him. At the same time, he knew if he moved, he would come too soon. So he squeezed her ass cheeks and kissed her throat, just feeling her warmth. She felt amazing wrapped around his cock. He moved his mouth to her neck, nibbling and suckling on the smooth skin there, while he waited for her tight, wet heat to loosen up. Her gasps in his ear were almost his undoing. When he lifted her up, she gasped again, and he when lowered her, she whimpered. He started moving slowly in and out of her, pumping his hips while he tried kissing her again. Her mouth was open, slack jawed, and she didn’t kiss back, so he kissed her neck some more. She tasted so good, he didn’t want to stop kissing her. And it distracted him a little from how good she felt, her slick heat wrapped around him.
He was kissing down to her clavicle when he heard her breathing quicken, and she tightened around him. He thought for a second he would die of pleasure, and she let out a long, low moaning sound that sent goosebumps prickling up his spine. Then he felt himself lose all pretenses of control, and he pounded into her two, three times and buried himself in her depths before carrying her to the bed on weak knees and collapsing on top of her.
They laid there connected, still semi-clothed, for a while before he came to his senses enough to sit up and remove his clothes. Renae was limp, almost asleep. He kissed her gently, trying to gauge her reaction to him.
That wasn’t at all what he’d envisioned their love-making tonight would be. He’d imagined a slow, sexy seduction in the bed. Not quick and dirty against the wall. But he’d lost control, and would like another chance to do it right. He looked down at little Jay, who lay limp and flaccid against his leg. Thinking of Renae, totally naked in bed with him, brought a slight twitch, and Jason decided he could probably go again if Renae was willing.
He looked again at the woman next to him, whose eyes were now open, gazing at him, unfocused. He leaned down and kissed her again before apologizing.
“I’m sorry about that. Lost control a little.”
“It’s okay. I did too.”
He kissed her shoulder and trailed kisses to the juncture of her neck. “Care to try again?” He was hopeful.
She giggled softly, the sound tinkling in Jason’s ears as she turned to him, pulling him closer. That was all the answer he needed. Slowly, he stripped Renae’s clothes off her and did things the way he’d wanted to in the beginning. It was magical.
He kissed her naked body from head to toe, stroking her to another climax before entering her again. He rocked into her slowly, bringing forth the noises that had made him lose control the first time, relishing them. His hands roamed her body, caressing her skin while he kissed her senseless. He was nearly blind with desire by the time he came again, and this time he cuddled her in his arms, vowing to hang on and not let go of this magical creature who made him forget his worries. She was worth sticking around for. Suddenly, staying in Serendipity didn’t seem so bad.
When Jason woke up, hours later, it was with feelings of anticipation he hadn’t felt in a long time. Her cinnamon scent filled his head, lingering on his sheets, overpowering the antiseptic hotel room smell. He was looking forward to taking her to breakfast, to talking to her more, to taking her to meet his dad. He hadn’t brought home a woman from a bar in years, and normally, at his age, that sort of thing would seem seedy, cheap. But something about Renae was different. She seemed innocent even though she was obviously in her thirties, and the ring indentation on her finger indicated at least a little experience. Thoughts of an affair had crossed his mind when he’d first noticed it, but she didn’t exhibit any other signs of cheating on her husband, and her shyness and lack of experience with picking up men had erased the thought. And last night had been explosive. The way she reacted to him at the bar and back at his hotel room. Wow. He wanted more. He needed it.
Laying there in bed, looking at the back of his eyelids, he thought of Renae and the possibilities of staying a little bit longer just to see what could happen. At his age, connections like that were few and far between. He owed it to himself to explore it.
Slowly, he opened his eyes and reached toward her side of the bed only to find it empty. A sinking feeling slowly formed in the pit of his stomach, and he listened for the shower. Emptiness met his ears.
She was gone.
Chapter 9
So that was what a walk of shame felt like. Renae turned on the shower in her bathroom and stepped under the hot spray, trying to wash off last night’s lovemaking.
No. They hadn’t made love. It was amazing, mind-blowing sex. Not love. Men didn’t pick women up in bars and take them to their motel room for lovemaking.
She’d woken up this morning early with a pounding headache and evidence of their lack of control dripping down her thighs. She felt stupid and more embarrassed than she’d felt even after Les’s public announcement of giving her over to Jason before singing Let’s Do It.
Oh Christ. What if she was pregnant? No, she couldn’t be. She was forty-four for crying out loud, nearly menopausal. God wouldn’t be so cruel as to make her pregnant now, would he? Ancient Depeche Mode lyrics floated through her brain about God having a sick sense of humor, and when the singer died, he expect to find Him laughing. Renae groaned. Nothing to do about it now. Kelly’s favorite saying replaced the song: It is what it is.
Yup.
Initially, she’d tried to leave a note on the tiny pad provided by the motel. Each note sounded ridiculous, so she’d crumpled them up and taken them with her, not even willing to let him find them in the trash can. She’d stuffed them in her purse when she’d got to her minivan and driven home. Maybe she would read them later during a moment of weakness.
Besides, she wasn’t sure of the correct procedure of a one-night stand. Was she even supposed to leave notes? There was no point in extending contact, certainly not if he was leaving in two weeks. He would think she was clingy, needy even, if she left a note.
Nope. She wasn’t needy or clingy
. She was doing just fine by herself. At least she hoped if she just kept telling herself that it might be true. As if her body relished contradicting her mind, a surge of need swept through Renae, and she decided to call Kelly after her shower.
She got out of the shower and toweled herself off to hear her phone ringing. Wrapping her towel around her, she looked at the display: a number with a 281 exchange she wasn’t familiar with. She knew the area code was Houston, so she assumed it was Jason, calling to thank her for a good time. Renae didn’t answer. She was perfectly capable of reliving the experience without hearing his voice. His sultry voice that sounded like velvet caressing her skin.
She shuddered at the memory of their lovemaking. Sex, she corrected herself. She’d never experienced sex like that, only watched it in movies. Slow, tender kisses and whispered terms of endearment. She would treasure the memories for the rest of her life. There was no way she’d be able to pick up another guy like Jason at the Gin. That night was not meant to be repeated.
Only savored in memories.
Getting dressed, Renae thought about what she could do today. She was restless as usual and didn’t know what to do with herself. By herself.
Renae toyed with the idea of calling Jason back, spending more time with him if he wanted. If every time they were together was like last night, she’d be hopelessly in love with him before his two weeks in Serendipity were up. Either that or completely addicted to sex with him. Either way, when he left, she’d be in horrible shape.
Deciding it was late enough to call Kelly, she dialed the number.
A sleepy voice answered. “-’lo?”
“Good morning, Sunshine. Did I wake you?” She knew she had. Kelly was not a morning person.
“Yeah…”
“Did you do something last night?”
“Yeah. Went to a party.” She heard the crack and fizz of a soda being opened and tried not to think about her daughter at college parties. Not yet. That was one thing she wasn’t sure she could stomach.
“Was it fun?”
She heard gulping on the other end of the phone followed by an “Ahhh… yeah. There were people there I hadn’t met before. I’m making a lot of new friends. But so is Chelsea, so we’re good.”
“Is Chelsea making the same friends you are?” Chelsea was a friend from high school who had gone to Stephen F. Austin University with Kelly. Renae hoped and prayed having the familiar friend there with her would keep Kelly grounded and help her to rein in the party tendencies that seemed to strike all college students. Renae had never been to college, so all she knew was what she saw on TV and read in the news.
“Yeah. Some. We’re supposed to go to the library today.” Another gulp of soda met Renae’s ears. “Thanks for waking me up, Mom. I need a shower.”
“Okay, sweetie. Have a great day, I’ll call you tomorrow. Have you found the student church groups yet?” God, she felt hypocritical asking her daughter about church after the night she’d had last night.
“Yeah, I have. I’m planning on trying one tomorrow. Talk to you later.”
“I love you, Kelly.”
“Love you, too, Mom.”
If it was possible, Renae felt even worse after hanging up the phone. Before she’d put it down, it rang again. Looking at the caller ID, she saw it was Jason again. She let it go to voicemail and then listened to it.
“Look, Renae, I’m sorry if I took things too far last night, but I had a great time with you. I want to see you again, and we don’t have to… do all that stuff, if you don’t want to… I just want to… talk… I’m not ready to say good-bye yet… Call me, please?”
She didn’t.
Chapter 10
Jason didn’t call her more than six times. He couldn’t bring himself to do it. It was obvious he’d done something wrong somewhere, and she didn’t want to see him again. He just didn’t know what he’d done, and he wasn’t going to beg her to tell him. He’d been with lots of women. Hell, he was over forty, a certified bachelor. Of course he’d bedded a lot of women.
But he’d thought Renae was different.
A week went by, and when he should have been packing his things to go back to Houston, Jason found himself going back home to pack his things to move to Serendipity. It wouldn’t be all bad. Serendipity, with its bevy of established homes and lack of new cookie-cutter houses had an air of established permanence. For a reason as yet unknown to Jason, that appealed to him.
He’d discovered he couldn’t leave his dad. The caretaker he’d hired was okay, but young, and Jason didn’t trust him to take care Joe completely. He felt better stopping by every day to check on things. And then there was the shop. He’d almost gotten it running in a manner where it could eventually function in the black, but it wasn’t there yet. Jason and Jodie weren’t even sure that Joe ever would be able to run it again alone, but Jason had to at least give him the chance. When he got that boot off his foot, maybe even sooner, he would bring him up to the shop and see how he did with the new policies Jason had put into place.
Yeah, so Jason had quit his job. He’d begun trying to get an extended leave of absence, but since he’d already hired a caretaker, the human resources department wouldn’t go for it. So he’d just quit.
Honestly, it wasn’t a super big deal. He hated his boss, but a job was a job, and now Jason felt like he was drifting. Jodie had promised to help him out if he needed, but he was forty-six for Christ’s sake. He shouldn’t be taking handouts from his brother. He had a little savings he could dip into, and he was making plans to go freelance with his graphic design skills even if graphic artists were a dime a dozen. He’d figure out his own shit after he got his dad’s situation figured out.
On Friday Jason closed up the shop, hopped on his bike, and rode to his dad’s apartment. When he got there, Mark, the caretaker was watching the news with Joe, the youth’s eyes glazed over with what Jason could only assume was boredom. Joe was dressed in dress pants, his Santa Claus suspenders, and a bow tie with holly leaves on it. His socks had little jingle bells on them, a gift last Christmas from Savanna, Jodie’s daughter. He was sporting a black eye. Jason had noticed more bruises on his dad since he’d moved out of the shop. Joe’s hands absently ran up and down his suspenders, stretching them and letting them snap back against his chest.
“Hey Dad, you know Christmas isn’t for another couple of months, right? What did you do to your eye?”
Joe’s eyes flicked to Mark, then back to the TV. “I think one of these terrorist cells live here. The neighbors upstairs acts strange, coming in at all hours.”
Mark rolled his eyes. “He tripped on the bedpost again. And I can’t keep any other clothes on him. He dresses himself, but if I don’t let him wear what he’s got on, he strips naked as a jay bird the first time my back’s turned.”
“I’ve been dressing myself for seventy-five years, boy.”
“Whatever. I’m gonna go grab a smoke.” Mark raised himself from his seat on the couch and sauntered outside. Jason took his place.
“What’s for dinner, Dad?”
Joe shrugged. “Don’t know. Meals on Wheels hasn’t gotten here yet.” His gaze turned from the TV to Jason, suddenly serious. “I don’t need a baby sitter. That boy’s got some problems. I don’t like him.”
“It makes me feel better to have him here, and there aren’t a lot of choices. Most of the people I interviewed were worse than him. And hopefully, it’s only temporary. Until you can get around better.”
“I need you to bring me my gun. I don’t trust him.”
Jason held back the disbelieving laugh that bubbled in his throat. “We’ll see, okay?”
They watched the news until Joe’s dinner arrived, and he immediately took it into the kitchen to eat it. He ate like it was his first meal in a decade, huge bites, barely chewing.
“Hey, slow down. You’ll choke.”
“I’ve got to eat it all before he comes back.” Joe said simply before continuing to shovel food into h
is mouth.
Jason sighed heavily and went to find Mark.
Mark was a young man in his early twenties who could probably shave more often and needed a hair cut. But that was youth. Jason could remember being that age and needing a job, flouting authority by his own passive aggressive tendencies. He seemed thrilled with the idea that Jason paid him cash and didn’t ask for his social security number when he’d hired him to watch over his dad during the days.
“Hey man. How’s he been today?”
Mark shrugged. “About the same as every other day, I guess. He thinks I’m trying to poison his colas, strips when I’m not watching, accuses me of stealing his food or beating him.”
“Well, you can go home. I got this tonight. You’ll take him to church on Sunday?” Mark shrugged again.
“Sure.”
“Cool. I’ll be by in the afternoon, then. See ya.”
Mark practically ran to his own car, and Jason mused about a young kid like him sitting with the elderly. He didn’t seem to particularly enjoy his job, but in this economy a job was a job. At least he was willing to do something for money instead of taking handouts. He had to give him some credit.
He went back inside to get his dad ready for bed and call Jodie with an update so he could go back to the shop.
“Hey man, how’s Dad today?”
“The same. He hates his caretaker, and thinks terrorists live above him,” Jason answered wearily. He looked over at his dad, who had hobbled back to his recliner and was watching “Wheel of Fortune.” “I’m about to get him into pajamas then go back to the shop.”
“Does he do anything besides watch TV?”
“Not really. He goes to church on Sunday, but I can’t stand that shit. Mark’s been taking him.” Jason hated church. All the little old ladies, eagerly grabbing him telling him all about their potluck dinners, preachers eyeballing him during the sermon, and whoever his dad had been trying to fix him up with was there. He just didn’t feel up to dealing with all that right now. He knew church probably wasn’t Mark’s bag either, but he was getting paid his hourly rate to take Joe to church and so far hadn’t complained about it.
