by Ana E Ross
“I have a key. Mike and Lauren allowed me to go and come as I please. Do you have a problem with that?”
Kaya shrugged. “It’s your house.”
He closed the distance between them and glared down at her, his mouth taking on an unpleasant twist. She was quite taken aback when instead of delivering some curt remark, he merely held the baby out to her. “Would you like to hold her? Experience the feel of a happy baby in your arms?”
Kaya took a swift glance at Anastasia, who seemed quite content to remain where she was. “She might start screaming again. Maybe she’s allergic to me.”
He sat down on the wide window seat. “She just misses her mommy and daddy. You have to learn how to calm her.” He put his thighs together and placed Anastasia on her back, her head resting on his knees and her legs toward his belly. He began to rub her tummy in slow, circular motions. “She likes this position. It’s her favorite.”
What’s your favorite position, Mr. Fontaine?
Kaya shook her head, shocked as the question formulated in her mind. What was wrong with her? She’d never had these scandalous thoughts about any man before. Ever since she’d met Bryce this morning, he’d been making her feel things, want things that were foreign to her. And she didn’t even like the man.
The sight of his long fingers making circular motions on the baby’s tummy made Kaya’s knees weak. With a shudder, she dropped down on the windowsill, being careful not to sit too close to him. She couldn’t handle another surge of current ripping through her. The man exuded enough bolts to short-circuit her heart. “She seemed to like that lullaby you were singing to her,” she told Bryce. “I’ve never heard it before.”
“You wouldn’t have.” The sharpness in his black eyes dimmed a notch, and for a split second he looked as if he’d been transported back into a dark time in his life.
Did he lose a child? Kaya wondered. Was that the bad experience Libby had mentioned? If he’d lost a child, where was the mother? Had he lost her, too? Was he married? Her heart skipped a beat. No. If he was married, he would have a ring on his finger, and his wife would be in the pictures he’d taken with Lauren and her family. He wasn’t married. She knew she couldn’t ask him anything without giving Libby away, so Kaya tucked her questions away for another time. “It’s a beautiful song,” she said with a bright smile. “And Anastasia thinks so, too. Look at her, gurgling and happy.”
“Here, hold her,” he offered again, gathering Anastasia into his arms.
Still reveling in the peaceful moments, Kaya put up her hands to stay him. Once she learned that song and mastered the art of baby-tummy-rubbing, she would have plenty of time to enjoy a quiet baby, whereas his time with her was limited. “You seem to have a way with her. Or maybe you just have a way with all women, no matter the age, Mr. Fontaine.”
“I’ll let you be the judge of that if you stick around long enough, Miss Brehna.”
“Then I guess I’ll never know. The children and I are leaving for Palm Beach next week.” The moment the words left her mouth, she regretted them. He’d just saved her day. She could be a little more understanding, a bit more sympathetic to his feelings. “I’m sorry, Bryce. I shouldn’t have said that.”
He graced her with an unexpected smile. “It doesn’t matter, Kaya. You may be going back to Palm Beach, but these kids aren’t going anywhere.”
“You seem so sure of—” Kaya stopped at the sound of feet thundering down the hall. Jason and Alyssa were screaming Bryce’s name as they raced each other to the nursery.
“Here, you have to take her.”
She got Anastasia out of his arms mere seconds before two excited kids burst into the room and threw themselves at him.
“Oh, boy.” He fell to his knees and wrapped them in a big hug. “I’m glad somebody’s happy to see me.”
Kaya mouthed a thank-you to Libby, who waved a goodbye from the door before hurrying away.
“Did you bring me a present, Uncle Bryce? You promised you’d bring me a present,” Alyssa said.
“You sure know how to deflate a man’s ego, darling Alyssa.”
Kaya smiled as Bryce sat on the rug and settled the little girl on one thigh while Jason perched on the other, their arms linking around his shoulders.
“What’s an ego, Uncle Bryce?” Alyssa asked.
“Something you don’t have to worry about for a long, long time, my sweet.” He tweaked her nose between his thumb and forefinger.
“So, did you bring me a present?” Alyssa rocked impatiently back and forth.
“Am I merely a present uncle to you, Alyssa? Is that all I’m good for?”
“I’ll give you a one hundreds of kisses.” She slapped her hands on his cheeks and lathered his face with noisy smooches.
“Okay. Okay. Hold the saliva. I brought you a new doll. It’s in your room.”
“Cool. Wicked cool.” She skipped out of the nursery.
“Such a little manipulator.” He wiped at his wet face, his broad smile softening his dark features. “That one would do anything, say anything, to get what she wants.”
“I know. Last night she justified getting into my makeup by claiming she wanted to be pretty like me. She’s mischievous, but so adorable. You can’t help but love her.”
Bryce chuckled.
Kaya laughed out loud. It was endearing to see this jovial side of him brought out by the antics of a four-year-old girl. He reminded her of her father and the fun times they used to have before he disappeared from her life. She was just a few months older than Alyssa the last time she saw him. So young to lose the most important man in her life. It saddened her to know that Alyssa had to experience a more permanent loss, but she was consoled that her niece had her uncle Bryce to fill the void Michael’s absence had created.
Yes, there was a definite bond of love and trust between Bryce and his godchildren, she thought, easing into the big, comfy chair near the crib and arranging Anastasia on her lap as she’d seen Bryce do. If she took these children away from him, they would see her as the mean old dragon for breaking that bond, just as she’d thought of Nadine for driving her father away.
You’re nothing like Nadine. You would never hurt these kids. The fact that you are willing to fight for them proves you’re different.
“I brought you a present, too, Jason.” Bryce’s voice reclaimed Kaya’s attention.
“What?”
“A set of skate skis and a snowboard. They’re the fastest and most popular on the market. All the kids in Europe are going bonkers over them. They’re black and chrome. I think that’s the color you wanted.”
“Yes, it is. Thanks, Uncle Bryce. You’re the best.” He wrapped his arms about Bryce.
Bryce hugged him close, but the grim look on his face told Kaya that he dreaded the next few moments.
He cleared his throat. “So how are you, son?”
“I’m fine. Why didn’t Mommy and Daddy come home with you? Are they having too much fun on the Alps?”
Bryce inhaled deeply and sharply.
Kaya shuddered. Jason’s heart was about to be broken.
“Jason, your parents didn’t go to Switzerland with me.”
“Yes, they did. Daddy said he and Mommy had such a good time when we all went before that they were going back again. I know they’re still there. You left them there, like you left us the last time when you had to come back home for business. Right?”
Bryce hesitated, swallowing, as if fighting his own affirmation, as if trying to find the right words for the little boy who wanted so much to believe the impossible.
He took Jason’s hands in his, and stared into his eyes. “Jason, listen to me. Your mom and dad didn’t go to Europe with me this time. And I didn’t leave them behind. They were in a terrible car accident two days ago. They died, son. They died.”
“Noooo.” Jason shook his head, his eyes wide with negation. “Noooo. Why are you lying, Uncle Bryce? Mommy and Daddy aren’t dead! They wouldn’t ever leave us. They p
romised. They promised they would never leave us.”
“Have I ever lied to you, Jason?”
He shook his head.
“Then believe me now, son. Your mom and dad are really gone. They didn’t want to leave you and your sisters. They didn’t want to break their promise to you, but it wasn’t their fault. They’re not ever coming home, Jason,” he reiterated.
Jason closed his eyes and his lips trembled as the words sank into his heart, crushed his young soul. “Why?” he wailed, trying so hard to make sense of a loss he didn’t understand and couldn’t accept. “Why did they have to die? Did me and Lyssa and Stasia do something wrong?”
“No! You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Then why did God take them away from us? Why did He take the two of them? Couldn’t He have left us just one?”
“I don’t know, son? I don’t know.” Bryce’s voice trembled with his own anguish and helplessness.
Tears rolled down Kaya’s face as Bryce hugged the child to his chest. Jason’s astute questions rang in her ears. Why did God take both of them? He could have left them one. She had wondered the same thing. Why did they both have to die?
“It’s not fair.” Jason’s body rocked with sobs. “It’s not fair. I want my mom and my dad back, Uncle Bryce. Please, bring them back home.”
“I wish I could, Jase. I really wish I could.”
“I hate God. I hate Him for taking them away from us.”
Bryce pulled the boy’s hands from around his neck and stared into his face. “Jason, I never want to hear you say that again. Promise me you won’t.”
Jason swiped the back of his hand across his nose. “You told Daddy you hate God for taking Aunt Pilar from you. I want to be like you, Uncle Bryce. I want to hate Him, too.”
“No, you don’t. You don’t want to be like me. You cannot hate God. You hear me. You cannot hate Him.”
Jason ran out of the room, sobbing.
Kaya stared at Bryce. His face was contorted, and his hands were pressed against his temples as if he were trying to muffle noises in his head.
A cold knot formed in her stomach. Pilar was Bryce’s horrific experience.
Who was she? His sister? Lover? Wife? Whoever she was, her death had caused Bryce to hate God. He must have loved her deeply.
That’s why Michael and Lauren had left the children to her. As much as they loved Bryce, and as much as he loved them, they couldn’t leave their children to a man who hated a God they evidently believed in. Not that she was any better when it came to religious matters. She didn’t even attend church. She probably knew less about God than Bryce did, but she didn’t hate Him. She wasn’t that stupid to alienate the Almighty Power and bring His wrath down upon her.
With a shake of her head, Kaya pulled her wits together. Whatever had happened in Bryce’s past was his business. It was none of her concern. Her concern was that little boy who’d just declared that he wanted to be like his Uncle Bryce, the man he adored, the man who may very well replace his father in his young malleable life.
The man who hated God.
“Go on, say it.” Bryce was on his feet, glaring down at her.
“Say what?”
“That I’m an ungrateful rebel for hating God. I mean look at me. I’ve been blessed with more wealth than any one man should have a right to, and I still can’t enjoy it. Tell me I’m a horrible person. It’s what you’re thinking, isn’t it?”
“No,” she answered, meeting his stormy gaze. “If you’re a rebel, you probably have a cause. As to you being ungrateful, I don’t know you well enough to make that assumption. You’re obviously hurt, angry—stuck in neutral, maybe. But I do know that you’re not a horrible person, Bryce Fontaine. These children love you. If you were as bad as you think you are, they wouldn’t give you the time of day. Children are like that. They instinctively shun the bad and embrace the good.”
“What are you, some kind of shrink?”
No, but I’ve spend enough time with one to know what she would have said. “I’m just very worried about Jason,” Kaya said in an attempt to steer the topic of conversation away from Bryce. She hadn’t come to Granite Falls to fix his problems. She had her own.
“I’m worried about Jason. I knew he’d be upset when he heard the truth. I didn’t expect this outrage.”
“He’s in shock. He doesn’t really mean what he said.” Bryce wiped his hand over his short crop of black hair. “I should call Samantha.”
“Yeah, that’s a good idea. She said to call her after you talked to him.”
Anastasia began to whimper again. Kaya rubbed her tummy the way she’d seen Bryce do. It didn’t help. Her whimpers grew louder.
“What’s wrong with her now?” he asked, looking at the infant with a bit of impatience.
“I think she’s hungry.”
“Then feed her.”
“That’s the problem. She misses being nursed. She doesn’t take the bottle well. Or maybe it’s the formula she doesn’t like. I— I called her pediatrician—”
He glanced at the half empty feeding bottle siting on the dresser. He picked it up and pinched the nipple between his thumb and forefinger.
Kaya inhaled sharply, and to conceal her response to his actions, she gathered Anastasia and hoisted her over her shoulder.
“Did you try a different kind of nipple?” he asked.
“Huh?”
“Of course, what would you know about babies and bottles and nipples? Rearranging furniture is your specialty.” He set the bottle back on the dresser.
“There are different kinds of nipples? A nipple is a nipple, isn’t it?”
“No, Kaya. A nipple is never just a nipple. Nipples come in different colors, shapes, sizes, and textures.”
The slow, seductive sound of his voice, especially when he said “nipple” coupled with the sensual flame in his dark eyes, caused Kaya’s own nipples to tingle and harden beneath her lacy bra. When his eyes shifted from her face to her heaving chest, then back to her face, she knew that he knew that she knew they’d moved beyond discussing the nipple on a baby bottle. Heat and moisture gathered at the junction of her thighs. Her throat became dry, and she had no power to stop the soft moan that escaped her.
Kaya was so happy she was wearing one of Lauren’s bulky sweaters.
“Babies get attached to the feel and texture of their mothers.”
God, he wasn’t done. If he said that word one more time…
“What you have to do is find a nipple that matches the shape—”
“Okay! I got it.” Just shut up, already.
A satisfied smile curved his lips.
She wanted to smack him. Again. Twice in one day.
Maybe seduction was his way of convincing women to yield to his desires. If he thought he could just sing her a lullaby and she’d lie down beneath him, he’d better think again. She had to remember that they were still at odds when it came to the future of the children. “How do you know so much about babies? You don’t even have kids of your own. Or do you?”
“Kaya, as far as I’m concerned, these kids are just as good as mine.”
Just the answer she was expecting.
He pulled his cell from a case at his waist and strode out the door on his Viking legs, leaving her just as he’d found her—in the middle of the nursery, holding a fussy baby in her arms.
* * *
“They’ve been up there forever,” Kaya said as she walked into the kitchen from the playroom where she’d just put on a movie for Alyssa, Snoopy, and her dolls.
“It hasn’t been that long,” Bryce replied from the chair where he’d just sat down to feed Anastasia.
“It feels like it.” Kaya stared at the mess of bottles and nipples of varying sizes, textures, and colors scattered on the counter top. There were nipples made from latex and some from silicone; there were angled, orthodontic, and vented-shaped nipples; there were small, medium and large nipples with varying ranges of flow speeds. And then ther
e was a huge variety of bottle textures and shapes to chose from.
There was definitely an acute science to this bottle and nipple amalgamation, Kaya thought as she watched Anastasia suckling greedily from the “nipple she had chosen” according to Bryce—a latex, orthodontic, medium-flow nipple. They’d tried several until she latched on to that one, which Kaya supposed most closely resembled her mother’s.
Kaya finally took Bryce seriously when he said that he was close to the children and knew how to take care of all their needs. He’d called someone who owned a baby store in downtown Granite Falls, and instructed her to deliver one of every baby bottle and nipple she carried. The man didn’t even have to go out. He called, and the town came running. That was how powerful he was around here. Did she really want to go up against such force?
No, but she would do it for her new family—especially Jason, who she still had to win over. The timing of her return to Palm Beach hinged heavily on his psychological and emotional demeanor, and from what she’d witnessed in the nursery, plus the amount of time he was now spending with Samantha, Kaya knew it would be a while. The thought of spending too much time in Granite Falls filled her with anxiety. The longer she stayed, the stronger the bond between Bryce and his godchildren would become. They might realize that they didn’t need her at all. But she needed them.
“Do you think Jason will be okay?” she asked Bryce grudgingly.
He raised his head. Sorrow and antipathy mingled in his glance. “I don’t know, Kaya. Would you be okay if you’d just lost both your parents?”
“I guess not.” She was never okay after the day she last saw her father.
“I trust Samantha. She knows how to help people through tragedies such as this,” he remarked in a more amicable tone.
So how come she hasn’t helped you through yours? She pulled out the chair at the far end of the table and sat down.
“Jason is a very quiet and sensitive boy. Not the average nine-year-old who’s ashamed to kiss his mother in front of his friends. He and Lauren were very close. They shared a very special kind of love. Maybe it’s because he was her first child and only son. I don’t know. Some people accused Lauren of babying him. Losing her wouldn’t be easy for him.”
