I rolled over onto my side and closed my eyes.
Damn Tate.
I had to bite my tongue when he strutted out the door because I didn’t want him to leave.
That ‘one day soon’ was now.
**********
Tate
“Dude, you look like ass.”
I sat down on the mat and pulled off my sparring gloves. “Remind me why the hell I’m your friend?”
Dante bounced around on the balls of his feet and circled the punching bag. “Because I’m irresistible.”
I scoffed and laid back with my arms over my head. “I haven’t been getting much sleep.”
“You still staying with Ryker while his aunt works?”
“Nah, that only lasted a week.” After seven days, Ryker had insisted he didn’t need me sitting with him anymore. As much as he loved hanging out with me, he said a man needed his space. I still gave Hadley a ride to and from work and stuck around to spend as much time with her as I could.
“So, what the hell are you so tired for?”
“Just been doing some stuff.”
Dante stopped jumping around and looked down at me. “Dude, we all know you’ve been seeing someone. Why the hell don’t you just tell us who?”
“What do you mean you know I’ve been seeing someone?” I was going to fucking kill Roman.
“We can just tell. You never hang out anymore, you’re always looking at the clock during classes waiting to leave, and you’re tired as fuck because you’re getting it. Every. Damn. Night.” Dante thrust his hips and acted like he was humping the air.
I tossed my arm over my eyes. “If I never see you do that again, it’ll be too soon.”
“Aw, come on, motherfucker. Tell me who the hell it is, and I’ll tell you what I’ve been up to.”
“I’m not interested.” Lord knew what the hell Dante was up to.
“Fuck you. I’m telling you anyway. You remember that instructor from Jim’s new dojo in town?”
I leaned up on my elbows and looked at Dante. What the hell was he going on about? “Yeah. I Ming a fling or something like that?”
“Mylin San. He’s a seventh-degree black belt. I’ve been watching.”
“What in the fuck do you mean you’ve been watching?”
“The studio.”
“Jim’s studio?”
Dante threw his hands up in the air. “Yes, who else’s studio do you think I’m talking about?”
“Have you been drinking?”
“No, asshole, I haven’t had a drink in fucking weeks. I’m just the only who is concerned about Jim moving into our town and taking away all of our students.”
I waved my hand. “You’re worrying about nothing. You and I both know that Jim is a bunch of smoke and mirrors that everyone eventually sees through him.”
“Except this time, he’s actually brought on an instructor that knows what the hell he’s talking about. I’ve been watching him.”
I stood up and grabbed my sparring gloves off the mat. “And you’re back to sounding like a psychopath.”
“I’m not fucking kidding here, Tate. “
“And neither am I, Dante. So, Jim finally has an instructor that knows what they’re talking about. Good for him. You wanna know why I don’t fucking care? Because the four of us know what we’re talking about too.” I bowed off the mat and grabbed my duffel bag.
“Hey, wait,” Dante called. “I told you what I’ve been up to, now you need to tell me what the hell is going on with you.”
I sighed, and my shoulders sagged. “I’m seeing someone, Dante, but that’s all you’re going to know.”
“Come on, we’re best fucking friends, and you can’t even tell me her name? Do I at least know her?”
“I’m not saying anything more. She doesn’t want anyone to know about us, and I’m okay with that.”
Dante stroked his chin. “Okay, man.”
Oh, hell no. That was the same look Dante gave me when he told me he had plans before, but couldn’t tell me what they were. “Leave it alone, Dante. You don’t need to know every damn thing going on in my life.”
He held up his hands and smirked. “Leaving it alone.”
I highly doubted that, but there wasn't much else I could do. “You’ll find out eventually, brother, just not right now.”
“How long have you been seeing her?”
“A little over a month.”
“Holy hell. That’s damn serious for you. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you date a chick for longer than two weeks. They typically annoy the fuck out of you, and you let ‘em go.”
I ran my fingers through my hair. “Well, this chick is different.”
Dante nodded. “Good, I’m happy for you even though you won’t even tell me her damn name.”
I flipped him off and headed to the bathroom to change. “Patience, asshole,” I mumbled. I shut the door and dropped my bag on the floor. That’s what I had been telling myself for the past month. Don’t get me wrong, sneaking around with Hadley was hot as hell, but I couldn’t tell you how many times I had to stop myself from touching or kissing her when Ryker was around. I felt like I was missing part of her by only being able to touch her when no one was around. I wanted the whole world to know that she belonged to me, but I couldn’t say anything. The only person who knew was Roman, and it wasn’t like I could talk to him about her. Hell, I think he forgot I was even seeing her.
I looked in the mirror and shook my head. I was thirty-one fucking years old, and I was sneaking around like a fucking high schooler hiding from their parents. Plus, I was fucking exhausted. Working and training all day, to then spend the night with Hadley, was taking its toll on me.
Something was going to have to change, and I wasn’t too sure Hadley was going to be okay with that.
**********
Hadley
“I’m gonna go to the movies with some friends, is that okay?”
I looked up from the magazine I was reading to see Ryker dressed and ready to leave. “How did you manage to get your shirt buttoned?”
“It only took ten minutes and rigging up my shirt and hanger to get the damn thing on,” he laughed.
I rolled my eyes and shut the trashy tabloid. “Next time, holler for help, and who are you going out with?” It was Friday night, and I was dressed and ready for work, waiting for Tate.
“I’ve had this damn thing on for a month already, I should be able to function without you, Haddie.”
I smiled and tilted my head. “You sure do know how to make a girl feel needed, Ry. Now, tell me who’s all going to the movies.” I was finally getting a handle on the whole guardian/aunt deal.
“Jim, Tony, Cassie, Millie, and Jordan.”
“Girls?” I questioned.
“Yes, Aunt Haddie, girls. Like you.”
I rolled my eyes and waved my hand. “Fine, go. Just don’t be out too late. I know it’s Friday, but your curfew is eleven.”
“I was going to spend the night at Jordan’s.”
“Have I met him?” The past few weeks, Ryker had a parade of friends coming and going, but I sucked at remembering names.
“Yes, he’s here every day to pick me up and take me to school.”
Oh. Shit. “I thought his name was Shawn.”
Ryker shook his head and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. “No. I don’t even know a Shawn.”
Shit bundts. I take back the fact that I was doing better at the guardian/aunt deal. “Well, I guess that’s fine, but call me when the movie is over, and let me know what you’re doing.”
Ryker nodded and hitched his bag over his shoulder. “Will do. I’m leaving now. I told Jordan I would meet him at his house.”
“You’re walking? Tate could give you a ride when he gets here.”
“Nah, I’m good. I’ll see ya tomorrow,” he called as the door shut behind him.
I sighed and sat back in my chair. “They grow up so fast,” I mumbled.
“
Knock, knock,” Tate called as he opened the door.
“Hey, you just missed Ryker.”
Tate shut the door and stalked toward me. “I saw him. He told me he was headed to a friend’s house for the night.” He bent down, picked me up, and his lips were instantly on mine.
I wrapped my legs around his waist and did the only thing I could, hold the hell on and let Tate have his way with me.
“Fuck, I missed you,” he growled. His hands were on my ass, and he ground his dick into me. My heart was beating wildly. If Tate hadn’t been holding me, I’m sure I would be a puddle on the floor. My body trembled, and Tate’s mouth slid over to my ear. “Tell me you missed me. I know your body missed me, but I need to hear it from your lips, sweetheart.”
“I…I missed you,” I gasped.
“That’s my girl,” he whispered.
My legs flexed around him, and I pulled myself as close as I could get to him. “I like that.” His head lifted from my neck. “Being my girl?”
I bit my lip and nodded. Oh yeah, I liked it a lot. His eyes were clouded with desire, and I could feel his dick through my panties. This was the only time I liked my work clothes. Short skirts and Tate were a combination made in Heaven.
“How much time do we have until you have to be at work?”
I looked over his shoulder at the clock above the stove. “Twenty minutes.”
Tate growled. “Just enough time to make you come on my fingers.”
Jesus Christ. “Tate,” I moaned and buried my face in his neck. “You can’t say shit like that.”
“Get used to it, sweetheart. You’re gonna hear everything I want to do to you all of the time.”
Tate moved to walk down the short hallway, but the click of the front door stopped him in his tracks, and I froze.
“Hey, I forgot to gra—” Ryker’s eyes hit Tate and me, and his jaw dropped.
“Fuck,” Tate growled.
I didn’t know what to do. Everything inside of me screamed to get out of Tate’s arms, but I couldn’t move.
“What the hell?” Ryker barked.
“Just calm down, Ry,” Tate insisted quietly.
“Calm down? How the fuck am I supposed to calm down. You’re screwing my aunt in the middle of the kitchen.”
“Ryker, please.” My legs finally unlocked, and I slid down Tate’s body. I pushed my skirt down and tried to look like I hadn’t been about to have sex. “We need to talk.”
Ryker shook his head and grabbed his coat off the back of the couch. “Fuck no. The time to talk was when you decided to screw my karate instructor.”
“Be careful how you talk to your aunt,” Tate warned.
Ryker glared at him and shook his head. His gaze turned to me, and he sneered. “You know what, you’re just like my mom, Hadley. She did the same shit to me. Thought I couldn’t handle the damn truth, and then she was gone.”
I pulled out of Tate’s arms. “Ryker, no that’s not what I did.”
“Really? How long has this been going on? Since I broke my arm?” Tate and I both stayed quiet. I didn’t want to have to lie to Ryker anymore. “Holy shit,” he gasped. “You knew each other before I introduced you.”
My eyes dropped to the floor, and I nodded. “I didn’t want to hurt you, Ryker. I didn’t want—”
Ryker moved to the door and cut me off. “You know what, I really don’t care what you want or what you meant, because either way you fucking put it, you didn’t tell me the damn truth.” He stormed out of the house without another word.
A sob ripped from my throat when he slammed the door.
“Sweetheart.” Tate moved toward me.
I put my hand up and shook my head. “No.”
“He needed to find out, Hadley.”
“No. Not like this. This is exactly what I was afraid would happen, but you wouldn’t let me go. Hell, I didn’t want to let go either.” I ran my fingers through my hair and moved to the other side of the kitchen. “I was selfish. I only thought about myself and not about Ryker. My sister wanted me to take care of her son when she died, and I’m doing a bang-up job of fucking it up.” God, I was a fucking idiot. Why didn’t I listen to myself? Was being with Tate worth losing my nephew?
“Just calm down, and we’ll talk about this.”
I shook my head and pointed to the door. “No. You said if I ever said no, you would stop.”
“I did,” he replied solemnly.
“No. Stop. Leave.” The three words that I knew Tate wasn’t going to ignore. “We can’t do this anymore. I can’t be selfish and only think about what I want.”
“Hadley, just take a second and—”
“No! What I need is for you to leave and not come back. I’m sorry, Tate. We never should have started this, because I knew one of us was going to get hurt besides Ryker.” Tears streamed down my face, and I wiped them away. “I’m sorry, but please leave before either of us hurts each other.”
Tate sighed, and his shoulders sagged. “I think it’s too late for that, Hadley.” He moved through the living room and turned to look at me when his hand was on the door handle. “I’m always here if you need me, Hadley.”
Another sobbed ripped through me, and I covered my mouth with my hand. I wanted Tate, hell, I loved Tate, but it wasn’t going to work. I would hurt myself over Ryker any day, and that was the choice I had to make now. “Just please leave.”
He nodded and left like the gentleman that he was. I said no, and he listened.
I said no, and I broke my own heart.
I was alone, and it was my own fault.
**********
Tate
Son of a fucking bitch.
I lost her.
**********
Hadley
“Hey, I’m sorry I had to pick you up so early. Rick is on my ass to do inventory before we open.”
I slid into the passenger seat and pulled my seat belt over my shoulder. “It’s okay. Ryker is still only talking to me in one-word answers, and that’s only when it’s necessary.”
Vanessa whistled and pulled out of the driveway. “Damn, that kid sure does know how to hold a grudge.”
That was an understatement. It had been three weeks since he had seen Tate and me together, and he had spoken maybe twenty words to me. He was there, but he acted like I wasn’t. I had tried to talk to him when he had come home the next morning, but he didn’t want to hear it, and I had no idea how to make him listen.
“His mom was the same way. I remember when we were growing up, and I had taken one of her shirts to wear on a date. She freaked the hell out, ripped it off me, and then didn’t talk to me for a week.”
“Jesus, you James’ are not to be fucked with.”
I laughed and rolled down my window. “Yeah, grudges are what we do.” I sighed and leaned my head back on the seat. “I just wish Ryker wasn’t so pissed at me.”
“Can I say something and have you not hate me?”
I rolled my head to look at her and smiled. “I really doubt you’re going to tell me anything I already haven’t told myself.” Vanessa had been giving me rides to and from work since I asked Tate to leave. Without her, I didn’t know what I would have done. My car was still a big ass paperweight, and my saving towards getting it fixed was like molasses in winter. It wasn’t happening quickly.
“You gotta make him listen to you, sweetie. You fucked up, but you didn’t intentionally mean to hurt him. You were trying to protect him.”
“But I still lied to him, V. Looking back, I should have just told him. I mean, he thought he was friends with Tate and the guys. I’m the last person he has who is there for him, and I fucked it up.”
Vanessa sighed. “Hadley, I think you are way too hard on yourself, and your nephew needs to step back and see that although you lied to him, you are human and you’re going to make mistakes.”
“Yeah, well, maybe someday he’ll talk to me. Until that day, I’m going to work my ass off and pray for the Publishers Clearing House
to come knocking on my door because that is about the only way my piece of shit car is going to get fixed.” Life sucked. Straight up just sucked.
“You know Rick is always looking for girls to take the stage.”
I looked out the windshield and closed my eyes. “I know. I don’t know if you’re a good friend for reminding me or a horrible one for thinking I should.”
“Hey, there ain’t no shame in stepping on that stage. I did it for two years before I got a job at Sultry Knights.”
I chewed on my lip and twisted my hands in my lap. “I know there's no shame in it, it’s just not how I saw my life going.” I never knocked anyone for their choices, but I didn’t know if stripping was the right choice for me.
“I bet if you did it a couple of times, you’d make enough to get your car fixed, and you wouldn’t have to do it again.”
The girls who took the stage did make a ton more than I did. When I had first applied for the waitress position at the club, Rick had tried to talk me into stripping, but at that time, I wasn’t completely hopeless.
But today was a different story, and it felt like I had passed rock bottom and was headed straight for a cardboard box under the highway. “I’ll talk to Rick tonight.”
Getting the car fixed would maybe help with the whole Ryker situation. He would, of course, ask me how I got the money to fix the car, but he wouldn’t need to know.
If I was going to fuck up my life, might as well go all the way and add stripper to my resume.
*********
Tate
“Put some fucking clothes on and get your ass out here.”
I looked at the front door and shook my head. Thank god I had locked the door before collapsing on the couch.
“Tate, you pansied ass-fucker. Pull your panties out of your ass and open the fucking door.”
Love on the Mat (Powerhouse M.A.) Page 16
