“What?!?” Sarah snapped back, “There’s nothing to talk about. She’s going to finish high school and join Claire next year in college. Don’t give her any ideas, Earl.”
Safire and Sadie started chanting and laughing, “Skylar’s quitting high school, Skylar’s quitting high school….”
“Enough, you two, your sister is not quitting high school,” Sarah said.
Claire listened to the conversation and decided not to chime in. Something else was going on with Skylar and she’d wait until they were alone to figure out exactly what was it was. As she sat and watched her parents and sisters laughing and grumbling at the same time over their meal, Claire had her mind on other things. Ryan was leaving for California the Monday after graduation. However the professional baseball, farm-team thing worked; he was going to start practicing right away. Her ideas of a last, romantic summer with him began to fade when he broke the news to her last week. She was sure this wasn’t a regular crush on a regular guy, but one thing was certain—it didn’t matter. Fate would bring them back together if they were meant to be. She had to believe in that. In the meantime, she’d learn how to pick up the pieces of her first-ever broken heart.
“Is Rachel coming to my graduation?” Claire dismally asked.
“I don’t know, honey, you never know with my mother. I guess it depends on if she can pull herself away from the city.”
“Well, I hope she can make it. I still want to visit her this summer before I go to school.”
Claire was mildly disappointed. She wanted both Grandmas and Regina to be there for her big day. She was certain she had romanticized her graduation as though it were some huge big deal. Graduation was a huge Rite of Passage for her, but maybe something only Zia Regina would understand. Maybe Rachel thought it meant nothing to have a high school diploma. And maybe she was right.
Everyone heard someone’s phone chime as they ate. Everyone but Earl picked up their phone to see who was being paged.
“Hey, may I be excused?” Skylar asked.
“Sure, honey,” Sarah responded, “Is everything okay?”
“Oh, Mom, everything is just peachy. One of my friends wants to meet at the bowling alley.”
“Which friend?”
“Janie.”
“Alright, twelve o’clock curfew for you. And behave.”
Skylar came around and kissed Earl and Sarah on the tops of their heads. She winked at Claire before disappearing off the deck.
“Well,” Sarah said, “I’m glad she’s hanging out with Janie. She’s a good kid and I know she’ll keep her out of trouble.”
Claire pursed her lips and grabbed another hot dog off the platter. She knew Janie was already out of town with her family on vacation. She wondered where Skylar was really going and with whom. One thing was certain— she wasn’t going to rat her out, but she was going to find out what was going on with her best friend.
~~~~
Skylar pulled her smartphone out of the front pocket of her jeans and looked to see if Felicia had texted her. Skylar wasn’t sure what to make of Felicia, exactly. They met a few weeks ago at the local coffee shop when their nameless drinks were mixed up at the pick-up line. Felicia seemed particularly cool and her beauty, Skylar thought, came mostly from her confident dose of worldliness and her je ne c’est quoi way of being in the world. Skylar knew it before they had spoken a word about themselves to one another that Felicia was special, but once they did it became clear to Skylar they were somehow connected.
“Hey, I think the sugar-free vanilla soy chai is mine, cutie,” Felicia said a sexy, but raspy voice, making Skylar instantly take notice during their first encounter.
“Oh, I’m so sorry… I ordered the same thing. I didn’t think…”
“Don’t sweat it. How about that, huh? Same obscure beverage order, maybe we were destined to meet.”
Skylar couldn’t think of anything to say in return. She felt a little weak in the knees and completely taken aback by the beautiful stranger standing less than two feet away. No guy had ever made her feel anything like it before. She quickly tried to piece some basic information together. Felicia was definitely gay—age was indeterminate, but she sounded like a New Yorker. Borough was undetectable, but the accent wasn’t consistent throughout her dialogue. She felt her life flash before her eyes and instantly put everything out her mind, deciding not to let her overactive mind get in the way of something great.
Skylar smiled, “I think we were destined to meet, I’m Skylar.”
“I’m Felicia, it’s nice to meet you.”
Skylar thought back to that moment five weeks, three days and twelve hours ago when they first met. Everything about both her intuition and Felicia were right on. They spent every night at Felicia’s parents’ house who had gone on an extended cruise, leaving Felicia alone to house-sit.
Felicia took the corner like a racecar driver, screeching the tires like a teenaged boy, startling Skylar from her dream state. She pulled up to Skylar near the bus stop bench.
“Hey, baby,” Felicia cooed.
“Nice set of wheels, there, gorgeous,” Skylar said as she opened the door and hopped in.
“Yeah, nice, huh? It’s my dad’s car… some kind of Cadillac with like 550 horsepower. This thing is really hot for an old guy to be driving.”
“I think it’s a CTS-V, this is a hot car for anybody to be driving, babe,” Skylar said.
“Well, look at you, so cute, taking me to school with cars.”
“My dad is really into cars, so….”
Felicia leaned over and kissed Skylar on the lips. Skylar responded, but let Felicia dictate the rhythm of their moving lips.
Felicia broke away gently and smiled at Skylar, “I thought I’d take you out tonight.”
“I’m not really dressed to go out, Felicia.”
“Well, I’ve got a couple of hot dresses that I normally wear for work that would look great on you.”
“I have to be home by midnight at the latest.”
“Alright then, girlfriend,” Felicia laughed, “we are going on a date.”
“Where are we going?”
“Somewhere fun,” Felicia said, “trust me.”
Unlike Claire, Skylar had always stayed on the periphery—completely out of is more accurate—of anything religious or Catholic, but she couldn’t help but think in this particular moment that she was in Heaven with a capital H. It turned out that Felicia was from Manhattan, but had lived in a couple of different countries while she was growing up when her father moved for work. Her parents settled down outside of Peekskill, New York, but they sent Felicia to a private high school in the city. They just bought their country house upstate, but they wanted to travel before they settled into retirement.
Skylar strolled through the front door as though she’d been living there with Felicia for the past five weeks. It came up in conversation more and more frequently as the days passed that they should live together. When they could create moments of lounging and reading in the guest bedroom, Felicia would hold Skylar in her arms and whisper all the sweet and wonderful things she could be and do living in The Village.
“I still have to finish high school,” Skylar lamented.
“Actually, you could do your senior year in the City.”
“Hmmm… I don’t know if my parents would go for that.”
Felicia sat and watched as Skylar slipped the form-fitting dress over her curves.
“Perfect.”
“It’s not perfect, actually. Maybe I should go to New York and finish school there. I hate high school. I hated it before I met you. Especially now that….”
“Now that you know you’re in love with women?”
“Maybe,” Skylar laughed at Felicia’s exaggerated coyness.
She jumped on the bed and tackled Felicia, pinning her down to the mattress.
“By the way, little one,” Felicia said, “when I said ‘perfect’ I wasn’t referring to you moving in with me, I was talkin
g about the dress. You look really good. You need shoes.”
“Oh, so you don’t want me…?”
“I didn’t say that, baby. You know how I feel. Let’s just go out tonight and have a good time. If you’re serious about changing your life, then we can talk about it, kay?”
Skylar smiled at Felicia. It didn’t matter that seven years separated them and Skylar had never been with a woman before. It felt right and she was going to ride this lesbian love wave regardless of what anyone thought about it. She knew Claire would have her back. And Sarah wouldn’t flip out so much about her being gay compared to her leaving school or the age difference between her and Felicia.
Skylar had to admit in a very short time, she had become a lipstick lesbian and she really liked it. It was a different feeling knowing women were watching her instead of men. It made her feel alive and less like a cheap piece of meat. Her looking good now invited the possibility of a relationship based on a connection or a great conversation. She couldn’t say that about the boys in her life that had ogled her thus far.
They pulled up to a big old red barn on the side of the thruway. It looked nondescript except for the large banner spread across its face indicating its name: Christopher Street.
“Wow,” Skylar stopped and stared. Her fitted black dress and three-inch heels contrasted with her post-make-out messy hair and patched up denim jacket.
Felicia stood for a moment to admire the beautiful, complicated and clever girl with a twist of lipstick, spandex and stilettoes and a down-home tomboy persona thrown in. She thought about falling in love, but the ball was not in her court. She was older and smart enough to know she’d most likely have to let Skylar go when the house-sitting gig was up. Maybe.
“Wow, what?” Felicia came behind Skylar and wrapped her arms around her.
“I heard about this place from kids at school and I actually thought about coming here… you know?”
“And… what happened?”
“I was afraid and embarrassed… I didn’t want to get made fun of. With all the so-called open-mindedness of our generation, teenagers are still mean.”
“So, you get to be here with me, beautiful Skylar,” Felicia kissed Skylar in the moonlit parking lot.
“Everyone is going to see us.”
Felicia winked, “Yes. Here and everywhere. Babe. Can you handle it?”
Skylar was so excited about feeling free and more like herself than she ever felt before. She was a little disappointed that her bravery was extrinsically inspired by Felicia, but in the moment she was willing to let it go.
“I can handle it, let’s go.”
The inside of the barn was dark but Skylar could see it contained two long bars running parallel down both sides of the hollow space. Barrels became makeshift tables and the dance floor, set to one side, was covered in hay. Skylar quickly surveyed the room while Felicia ordered their drinks. Skylar would have guessed maybe thirty percent of the bar’s patrons were women. She couldn’t believe how normal everything felt. She had never been to a bar before, she had never been on a date before and she’d never been on a date with a woman at a gay bar before. The newness of the situation was as exciting as the situation itself. Skylar knew in that moment, if Felicia would have her, that her decision was made.
“They didn’t ask for ID?” Skylar asked as Felicia handed her a gin and tonic.
“Nope.”
“Well, that’s good.”
Felicia took Skylar by the hand and led her to one of the bar height tables, “So, what do you think?”
“It feels normal,” Skylar laughed as she sipped her drink.
Felicia pulled two barstools next to one another without leaving any room. Skylar slid into one of the chairs before Felicia did the same. Skylar felt their bodies press against one another while she took another sip of her drink.
“It does feel normal. It feels good, huh?”
“Yeah, like I can be myself. I’m really happy, Felicia… happy that I met you. Happy I can be myself.”
“Well, I think this is just the beginning, babe.”
“I think I want to come with you to the City.”
“What?!? Don’t tease me like that, Skye.”
“I mean, I know it’s crazy, but there’s nothing for me here.”
“Well, I can’t argue with that. You seem like a city girl.”
Skylar didn’t know what it meant to seem like a city girl in Felicia’s eyes, but she didn’t question it. She wanted to feel free and be herself and New York City seemed like the best venue to find herself.
“I just want to live a good life. I want to live a full, happy life on my own terms. I don’t want to go to Vanderbilt and I don’t want to pretend anymore. I don’t want to be a cheerleader or friends with a thousand people on some social networking site.”
Felicia laughed, “You’re a cheerleader?”
“That’s what you got out of my diatribe?” Skylar asked as she finished her drink.
“I’m teasing you.”
“I was a cheerleader for a little while, but it’s been a few years.”
“Well, that’s good, I guess,” Felicia said, “I mean we all do things that are not always who we are, exactly.”
“Yeah, what did you ever do?”
“Hang on, let me get us another round,” Felicia waved her hand and the bartender nodded acknowledging her request.
“Don’t ever throw this in my face, but I was a clown in college. Sometimes I still do kids’ parties in the city….”
“What? Like a class clown?”
“No, like a Bozo the Clown, clown.”
Skylar laughed so hard she picked up her cocktail napkin to wipe tears off her cheekbones.
Felicia laughed with her, “I know, I know. It was pretty good money, though, and I graduated with no student loans.”
“I’m surprised your parents didn’t have some huge Ivy League fund for you.”
“I think my father wanted me to learn to do things on my own. I hate to admit it, but it worked. He gave me the whole lecture on managing my money and student loans and blah, blah, blah… you know, being smart about things. So, I got creative and it worked. A State School, hard work and some help from my parents. If they had helped me entirely I don’t think I would have felt like a grown-up as much. I wanted to make my own decisions without answering to anybody.”
“But they know you’re gay?”
“They know, but we don’t talk about it. I never brought anyone home for them to meet.”
“Why? Are you afraid they can’t handle it?” Skylar leaned into Felicia as they bartender handed her another drink.
Felicia draped her arm around Skylar and left her hand on her hip, “I’ve never met anyone I wanted them to meet… until now.”
Skylar smiled, let out a big sigh and sipped her drink, “I think I want to dance.”
Chapter Seven
Claire felt for her phone before opening her eyes. Her fingers stumbled in the dark as she tried to remember when she used it last before finally landing her palm square on its back. She hit the bottom button to generate some light in her bedroom and could see Skylar’s empty bed. Claire looked at her phone and remembered the last text she sent was at midnight asking Skylar to let her know she was okay. It was almost 1:45. Claire slipped out of her bed and carefully tiptoed through the house, making sure to miss the notoriously creaky second to last step on the stairway. Earl and Sarah didn’t need to know Skylar had missed her curfew. Everything looked normal in the moonlit spaces of the downstairs. Claire sat on the couch and texted Skylar.
Hey, I’m worried about you. Curfew was at midnight….
Claire strolled into the kitchen and looked around. The house seemed particularly quiet knowing Skylar wasn’t around. Claire looked at her acceptance package from Vanderbilt sitting on the counter and let out a long sigh. She couldn’t decide how she felt about going there without Ryan despite the fact she had her heart set on it long before she ever knew him. She c
ouldn’t help but think how boys or love or some combination of the two could really fuck with a girl’s head. She wondered how she could have gotten so weak in the knees in such a short period of time. But it didn’t matter, at this point, she thought. She filled out her paperwork and sent it back to school. Claire Sinclair, the famous whatever, would be attending her dream University in the fall. The Ryan shit would work itself out. Besides, Skylar would be joining her in a year. Claire knew she could do anything for a year and Skylar’s company was more important than anyone else’s. She made some tea and sat down at the breakfast bar.
The telltale squeak of the back door gave Skylar away at 2:15. She jumped when she saw Claire sitting in the kitchen. Skylar was with a girl Claire didn’t recognize.
“Oh, God, Clairebear, you scared me!”
“Shhhh!” Felicia tried to whisper as she and Skylar stumbled in the house.
“Hey, I’m glad you’re alright. You’re alright, right?” Claire asked.
“I’m great, big sister. I wanted you… to meet… my girlfriend, Felicia,” Skylar stammered.
Claire raised an eyebrow wondering exactly what Skylar meant by the term girlfriend. But it didn’t matter, Claire was relieved to see her sister home despite being really tipsy.
“Hi, Felicia, thanks for getting her home. Did you guys drive here?”
“No,” Felicia stammered, “we left my car at the bar and took a cab.”
“Hmmm… well, let me make you two some tea. We can talk about your night after you sleep some of it off.”
“I think maybe we should all just go to bed,” Skylar blurted out.
Claire led both girls upstairs and made a make-shift bed for Felicia on the floor. She said goodnight and turned out the lights. It was the first time she could ever remember feeling far away from Skylar. The non-connection was a new feeling and Claire didn’t like it. She wondered if the disconnect was a foreboding to her lonely life as a far-away college freshman.
Felicia seemed nice enough. She seemed like she was a little older, but alright. Claire would talk to them in the morning and get all the details about how they hooked up and what they did. Just as she started dozing off she could hear Felicia make her way off the floor and into Skylar’s bed. It was the first time either one of them had slept with a love interest in their shared bedroom of eighteen years. Claire had to admit it was a little strange to hear some making out-heavy petting going on, but she thought the best thing she could do would be to ignore it and go to sleep. She was happy that Skylar was exploring her newfound sexuality; it was more than Claire could say about herself. She put her pillow over her head and went to sleep.
Twist of Fate Page 6
