“You taste so damn sweet.”
My body shields with chill bumps, knowing what’s coming. Ignoring the fact that I could and probably will end up hurt takes a very far back burner to the way he’s touching me. With a quiet sigh, my eyes slip shut as he moves his tongue leisurely up and down my thigh before sliding over my mound, taking his time to explore my body.
“Open them, Kass,” he orders with a stringent tone. “Let me see your eyes.”
Heated passion drifts through me at his sensual but stern command, his tone a complete turn-on. Without a second thought, I do as he ordered, yet I’m stricken with nerves at what I’m feeling. The tone of voice I’m hearing. The depth of heat in his eyes.
“Rhett, can I ask you something?”
Between my thighs, he blinks up at me, his expression intent. “Of course. Ask me anything.”
“Am I wrong in thinking that you’re a Dominant?”
“Kass.” His piercing blue eyes shine up at me, his lips bending into a wickedly sensual grin. “I think you already have your answer.” He studies me for a few seconds, his eyes deep with need. “Doll, I’m only dominant in the sense of control and power. I have no intentions or desire for anything involving pain.” He bends my right thigh over to the side. “Watch me. And relax. Enjoy what I do to your body. Let me lick your sweet sex until you can’t take it anymore. Then damn it, tell me if you still think I want to be anywhere but right here.” Both thumbs stroking my sex, I feel it deep in my nipples and all the way into my teeth. His fingertips slip inside me, making my toes curl.
Oh, God.
Desperate, I reach for his shoulders for leverage because I need something to keep my body from rearing up and losing complete control. His wrists urge my legs up and over his shoulders, while the tips of his thumbs push my sex apart and stretch me wide open, leaving me exposed and vulnerable. I’m doing everything in my power to hold back the scream lodged deep in the top of my throat. Our eyes like magnets, his slip shut for a quick second before opening back up when his tongue leans into my cleft. Rough and impatient, he’s teasing. Sucking. Dragging that wonderful tongue in all the right places with just the perfect pressure. My fingers claw at his shoulders when he suctions me between his lips, tugging on my clit while his thumbs move around inside me.
“Oh, Rhett.” I’m trembling, my simple animalistic instinct sending me into nothing but pure sweet satisfaction.
Currents of pleasure spiral deep through my core as he holds me possessively, watching me as I fall apart. Paralyzed with pleasure, I want to scream. Do anything he asks. Drop to my knees and take him between my lips. Submit. Cede control. Anything and everything he wants. Strong feelings swirl behind my chest as I wish for everything I shouldn’t. Threads of tension fill my belly as he continues licking through me with long strides from one end to the other, his pleasured groans and heat-filled gaze sucking the air from me.
“Does that feel like I want to be any fucking where else, Kass?” His eyes darken, the growling edge to his deep voice flooding me with all kinds of sensations as he stops what he’s doing. I instantly think I may die if he doesn’t continue.
I shake my head, a hushed “no” sliding off my tongue as I stare into his eyes.
“Then relax, doll.”
He purges through my sex again and again, his hands pushing my thighs apart almost to the point of discomfort as he proves more possessive traits.
Yes. God, yes.
His eyes, widely open and beautifully blue, hold my gaze as he refuses to ease up, even though my body is so sensitive that I’m writhing with every pounding spear of his tongue. My sex tightens, everything inside me pulsing. Spasms start deep in my belly and quickly sprint downward. Moisture laces the corners of my eyes and I start to ease them shut.
Oh God. Oh God.
“Keep them open!”
A throaty moan jets up my throat as my eyes pop back open. Pleasure explodes through every part of my body at the harsh tone of his command while he suctions me between my lips and I spiral into an orgasm that I feel all the way up my chest.
With one long, final kiss through my soaked slit, he releases my quivering legs. His lips are shiny, glistening with my release. My eyes fixate on him as he kicks off his pants. His body is exquisite. He’s beautiful as sin. Dear God, I want this man. He shifts his weight, hovering over me and kissing my lips, the feminine taste of my arousal coating my mouth as his tongue swirls over mine.
“Now that we’ve settled the small fact that I’m not going anywhere, I’m going to fuck those insecurities straight out of you.”
His bold words make my insides melt. How could something like being controlled be so terrifying, yet sensual and satisfying all at the same time? Fearlessly reaching for him, I take his hard erection between my fingers, lowering my touch down and over his tight balls.
“Kass, God.” His voice comes out as a moan, his gaze warm and needy. “You’re killing me, sweetheart. I need inside you.” He sweeps his lips over my mouth as I move my hand up and down his silky shaft. With a quick push of his shoulder, he’s on his back and I’m sliding down his body.
“Fucking hell,” he whispers as my tongue teases the leaky slit on his crown. He reaches for my temples and slides the balls of his thumbs into my hair. I reach for his hands and place them by his hips, then grasp him by the root, sucking the velvety first inch before taking him entirely. Low rolling moans of pleasure deep down in his core pull the same from me.
“Feels so good, baby. Feel free to top me any time you please.”
I move up and down the length of his cock, tasting salty drops of warm pre-cum and male. Reaching for his balls, I squeeze gently and hum against the underside of his length, watching his eyes seal shut as he moans another erotic, torment-laced sound.
“Kass, I can’t … I’ll come if you don’t stop.”
Not nearly done with him, I take him between my fingertips again and suck, lick, and caress every heavily-veined line. His primal expression makes me delirious, and I moan against him again before wildly moving my lips and tongue over and over, determined to bring him to climax. I reach for his balls, which instantly draw up and tighten, and squeeze.
“Kass.” Gasping, he sighs so loudly it sounds more like a moan. “Sweet Jesus.” He pulls out abruptly, grabbing me by the hips and lifting me off the bed, plowing my back against the wall so hard that it shakes my teeth. Neither of us is ready for this to end, and he reaches for his raging erection and drives through my sex in a single, brutal stroke. My legs coil around his waist, which earns me another pleasured moan as he pummels my body in deep, insistent thrusts while my fingers drag over his shoulders.
The sound of my body hitting the wall, along with skin slapping skin, rings loudly through the room, both of us drawing deep, throaty breaths with each stroking thrust. Bruises on my body are inevitable as my back is pressing viciously into the rough wall, but it hardly seems to matter. There’s nothing but pleasure and satisfaction.
“Rhett,” I whisper against his lips, seconds from falling apart. His grasp on my ass tightens, his fingertips burying into my skin.
“You’re so damn beautiful,” he moans into my mouth, his gaze holding a potency that stabs deep at my heart. He lifts me higher, changing his angle. My muscles flex and tighten. Gripping his thrusting cock with all my strength, I ease my eyes shut, my emotions lifting. Charging. Strengthening.
“Look at me, dammit.” His gaze cuts through me. Pulverizing his hips against mine, I’m clenching tight, my muscles thrashing, more emotional tears swimming in my eyes.
The hands digging into my hips suddenly turn still. His chest roars with a moan. “Christ.” He pumps into me again and again with deep, throaty groans until he thrusts one hard push, jerking as currents of warm semen spurt inside me. His face tense and clenched, he reaches for my clit. In seconds, I’m falling apart again, seeing nothing but bright white lights as my orgasm rocks deep inside me. When I open my eyes back up, I’m looking into a clear
blue gaze. So damn perfect. So beautiful. So right.
When our bodies stop quivering, he eases out and lowers me, pulling me against his chest and holding me close. His heart pounds against mine as the heavy trickles of his release ooze out of me and everything between my legs aches in a wonderful way, making me tremble with more emotion. I try to back out of his hold. Ask him if there’s anything I should know. His arms press against my shoulders, refusing to let me move.
“Don’t ever do that again, Kass.”
I blink up at him, his strong grip still preventing me from moving more than an inch. “What? I don’t understand.”
“Don’t ever try and tell me what I want, or where I want to be.” For long seconds, we’re both quiet, as I struggle with a good way to respond.
“Next time you accuse me of not wanting you, I’ll make you wish you hadn’t.”
Hell.
My heart racing, I stare up at this man that’s been nothing but a tormenting confusion. “Then make me feel different, Rhett. Make me feel important… Tell me about your wife.”
Seconds tick by as I wait for him to respond, which he doesn’t. He only stares at me with a crushing sadness in his expression, along with the other unsettling look that I’ve seen before—rage.
****
Both of us are dressed and back in my living room, standing awkwardly after what was probably the deepest, most intimate sex I’ve ever experienced. When I mentioned Lindy, after the initial shock of my demand, it only took Rhett fifteen seconds to release me and shove his clothes back on.
I can tell he wants to say something, feel the unspoken words that are seconds from coming by the look in his eyes.
He clears his throat, raking a hand through his hair. “Fuck, Kass. I don’t know where to start. How much do you know?” Emotion is heavy in his tone.
“Just that she was shot in the neck and you in the shoulder.”
He traces his shoulder with his fingertips, his jaw clenching tight.
“You’re not over her, Rhett. I see it in your eyes. Sense it in your body.” My eyes tear up, a cold chill sliding down my spine. I take a step backward, then a second. Anywhere but close enough to smell his scent. Our scent.
“There’s more to it than not being over her,” he counters. “I just … fucking hell. I like you so much, Kass. Think about you every damn day. Crave your touch like my next breath. But honestly, I’m not in a position for anything serious right now. I’m sorry if I’ve led you to believe otherwise. That wasn’t my intention. You deserve everything, when I have nothing to offer you.”
“You bastard,” I whisper, fighting ugly tears. “Mission fucking successful, Rhett.” I choke back a sob. “You’re very good at making a woman feel special when she’s not. Exceptionally convincing. I’m sure you make an outstanding team captain. And an even better controlling Dom.”
The words coming out of my mouth are harsh and bitter. Even though I feel pain for what he’s been through, my own agony trumps his right now. I feel like I’ve just taken a shot through the heart.
His expression is empty, his eyes fixed hard on my face. “Don’t be ridiculous, Kass.”
“Ridiculous,” I whisper. “I’d hardly call it that.”
His tone changes from hard steel to soft, smooth silk. “You couldn’t be more wrong about me. Let me explain.” He strides toward me, grabbing me by the arm. His strength, his smell, his tousled hair, all the ultimate portrayal of sex, shoot straight back up my thighs as much as I fight it.
“Don’t. Please.” I clench, struggling out of the hard grip that I really don’t want to flee. Backing away from the warm body that I really don’t want to withdraw from.
He watches me with a repressed expression for a long second then walks back to the couch, sitting down and shoving his elbows deep into his knees, grabbing at his temples.
The next few minutes seem never-ending. I feel like I can’t move. A stroke of silence passes, knots tugging at my stomach.
“Not a lot to explain. That much I can see,” I whisper through a hard swallow, my hands shaking. I really thought maybe he wanted more. No, I hoped he wanted more. But my intuition was right. I was a rebound fuck.
“You wooed me with all your charm. Swept me off my feet only in hopes of forgetting where your heart still lies. I get it, Rhett. You’ve been through a lot. Lost the woman you love. And I gave my body to you willingly because I wanted to. But I’m not going to be your side piece or your rebound sex. And I’m certainly not going to be pushed and shoved around like a trained pet. I can’t. I won’t.”
His voice cracks as his eyes soften and become defenseless. “You’re right, Kass.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Rhett
The truth can hurt. Keeping it hidden can destroy.
I watch her walk toward her back window, a fucking jackhammer attacking my temples as I search her troubled face while a whirlwind of sentiment steals mine. She’s silent, her eyes solemn, tearing up as she gazes into the distance. Seeing her this way, knowing I’m the cause, splits my fucking heart in half.
“I’m sorry, Kass.”
With an exaggerated laugh that lacks amusement, she says, “Well, all this certainly brings clarification to the elephant lingering in the room every time we’re together, doesn’t it?” She shrugs like it’s no big deal when her shaky hands tell me differently. For more long seconds, neither of us speak, and I stare through the windows, my stomach knotting as I try processing the fact that I’m nothing more than a fucking lowlife bastard.
“I’m really hating you right now,” she whispers, avoiding my eyes.
I walk toward her and reach for her arm, my hands suddenly shaking as badly as hers. I spin her around to look at me, and she takes a swing with her free hand, slapping the side of my face so damn hard that I feel it through my teeth.
“Let me go, Rhett.”
I instantly release her arm and tug at my hair, agonizing pain thrashing in my chest, a headache stirring behind my eyes. I want this woman so much that it seems like an obsession. But I don’t know how to do this. Or if I can. I have shit I need to deal with. My head isn’t straight. I can’t even sleep through the motherfucking night without waking up covered in sweat.
Disgust pools behind her eyes, gutting me. I’ve spent months wondering, and trying to get her out my head, knowing damn well I still have demons to overcome. Far from being out of this crisis, everything in my life is unbalanced. And will continue to be so. Nothing about me is normal. What made me ever think it could be?
Her voice quivers. “Will you please just go?”
It’s understandable where her dilemma has stemmed from, and I know I need to step back, but nonetheless catch her hand and pull her against me. Hoping like hell she doesn’t walk away. Yet, knowing she will. And should.
“Kass. For Christ’s sake, wait a fucking minute.”
She frowns and swipes at her eyes. “Let’s don’t try and make this something it isn’t,” she says, a single tear slipping from her eye. “You’re a professional hockey player. You’re probably used to having flings with jersey chasers … or puck bunnies … or whatever you call them. Rebound sex shouldn’t be an issue for you.”
“Flings?” My jaw clenches tight as I swallow a lungful of air while she glares at me with an icy, strangled expression. “These flings as you call them, were originally spent at a depressing hospital surrounded by people who most likely never left the four walls they were in. And now, my days of rebound sex are spent alone, beating myself up and trying to remember the faces of two men that shot an innocent woman, leaving her in a coma for nearly five weeks before she lost her life entirely.”
Kass shivers and blinks up at me.
“She couldn’t speak. Couldn’t feed herself. Didn’t respond to a fucking thing, Kass.” I nearly choke on my words, my voice cracking. “All my fault. All because I made a bad decision.”
The heaviness in my chest suddenly makes it hard to breathe. I can’t stand the h
urt in her eyes. I want to grab her up and take away all the disappointment and replace it with that breathtaking smile. As much as I try denying it, I’ve allowed myself to develop feelings for another woman when my wife’s ashes haven’t been in the ground for a year. I want to spend every minute that I can with her, knowing I can’t.
Knowing she deserves better.
She reaches for my hand and squeezes. “Can you tell me what happened, Rhett?”
With a hard swallow, I lead us back to the sofa. Time passes as I tell her everything that happened that Valentine’s Day. I don’t expect her to forget, but hope like hell she can find it in her heart to somehow forgive me when I say goodbye.
But if she can’t, I’ll understand.
I’ll learn to live with it, even though it’ll hurt like hell.
****
February 14th and it’s cold, the wind howling through gray-streaked skies. The seafood restaurant she loves has valet parking, but choosing to ignore the bone-chilling wind, Lindy’s demanding we park the new S-Class two blocks away from the restaurant so we can window-shop before dinner.
I could have refused.
Put my foot down.
Demanded I wouldn’t leave my new Mercedes in the fucking deserted spot.
But it was Lindy. I’d do anything she asked. I loved her so damn much.
It’s late when we finish dining on a relaxing lobster dinner and nice bottle of wine. The streets are still busy, but light is nonexistent in the corner spot where my car is parked. The vacant building behind it appears empty, doesn’t look threatening in the least. Just another rundown, dilapidated old building. There’s a hundred others just like it in the city.
Lindy’s holding my hand as we near the curb to cross the street.
“Give me the keys. It’s my turn to drive this beauty,” she says.
Waking the Lion Page 12
