Almost A Spinster

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Almost A Spinster Page 15

by Jenna Petersen


  The sudden sting of tears scratching at Maddie’s eyes surprised her. She blinked furiously. For heaven’s sake, telling the man what she ought to have said the day before was not worth becoming a ninny over. And she deserved whatever reaction he had in spades.

  “Mr. Blackstone,” she began, her hands shaking.

  “There is the pond,” he said, apparently not hearing her whispered words.

  She looked up and drew in a harsh breath. There in the distance was a shimmering body of water. All around its edge were blossoming flowers and the surface of the pond was crowded with lilies.

  “My,” she breathed, momentarily forgetting her need to confess. “It is so lovely.”

  He nodded. “It is my favorite place in all the shire.”

  They moved forward together until they came to the pond’s edge. A cool breeze wafted from the water’s face and calmed Madeline’s ragged nerves. A sense of peace overtook her and she let out a long, contented sigh.

  This stolen piece of time was perfect. And it didn’t matter that in a moment or two more, it would all be destroyed.

  “I almost forgot,” Nathan said, reaching into the front pocket of his waistcoat. He drew out a small book and held it out to her.

  “My novel!” Maddie cried, taking the little tome from him. “I was so distracted, I never did find it yesterday and gave it up for lost. Wherever did you get it?”

  Nathan shrugged one shoulder. “After I left you, I recalled that you never found the book, so I went back and searched for it. It had flown quite far in your fright. I’m afraid it was a little damp, but it dried out well last night. No harm done, was there?”

  Maddie stared at the pages of her story. It was a silly book, nothing that was that important to her, but this man had still gone back to where they had met and went to all the trouble of not only finding it, but insuring that it was returned to her in the best condition possible.

  She lifted her gaze to his and stared into the impossibly blue depths of his eyes. “It is perfect, thank you, Nathan.”

  For a long moment, a silence surrounded them. But even Maddie realized it was a different kind of silence than the one that they had shared before. This one had no comfort to it, nor awkwardness. No, it was charged by something else entirely. Something warm and focused. The kind of thing authors sometimes wrote about in the books she devoured. That nameless feeling struck Maddie dumb even as Nathan took a long step toward her.

  Even as he gently tilted her chin up.

  Even as he brought his lips down and pressed them to hers.

  Chapter Three

  Nathan had no idea why he kissed Maddie. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. He had some idea. When she looked up at him, when she whispered his given name, when she stared at him like he was the most heroic man she had ever met in her life… those things had been utterly bewitching. And when she’d darted out her tongue to wet her lips, probably without even recognizing she’d done it, he had been lost.

  But he wasn’t the kind of man who made a habit out of taking women he’d only met a day before into his arms and kissing them in the middle of the woods. Propriety and honor had always been his mantel, giving no hint of scandal that would make him beg to any man.

  Maddie… she made him forget those things. In fact, the kiss, which he hadn’t planned, had slowly begun to change. In the beginning, it had been a gentle, innocent meeting of lips. Warm and soft, but lacking passion.

  Still, the longer he stood here, his hand cupping her chin, her mouth pliant beneath his, honor and propriety faded away, replaced by more. By want. By need. By desires long suppressed.

  So when Maddie parted her lips beneath his on a ragged sigh, he took the unwitting offering and glided his tongue into the hot cavern of her mouth. She stiffened out of surprise for a moment and he waited for her to pull away. Instead, her hands came up to clench his jacket, her body molded to his and she shuddered.

  It was too much for any man to take. And so Nathan surrendered to the taste of her, sweet like honey with a background freshness of mint. To the rose and lilac scent of her skin. To the feel of her tongue touching his ever so gently.

  He found himself winding his arms around her waist, pulling her closer, reveling in the way her body curled into his like they were meant to go together. Damn, it had been a long time since he indulged his baser appetites and he had almost forgotten how good a woman could feel when she surrendered. Soft, the polar opposite to the rapidly hardening planes of his own body.

  He had to stop this. His rational mind screamed at him to remember who he was, what she was, where they were, but it was so difficult when Maddie made a little, low moan of pleasure and her head tilted to grant him better access. Still, he was the gentleman in this situation and he had to…

  Before he could finish that thought or stop kissing Maddie, there was an eruption of sound as a huge flock of birds that had been nesting in the tree beside them exploded into the air. The massive flapping of wings and cries of the creatures shocked them both. Maddie released him, staggering away with a gasp.

  She stood stock still, staring at him. Her face was flushed, her lips dark pink and swollen from his attentions and her exotic eyes glittered with what he knew was desire and innocent shock. A combination that had him clenching his fists in order to keep from taking her back into his arms.

  “That was… unexpected,” she said softly, more to herself than to him. She blinked, staring at him like she was just seeing him for the first time.

  He couldn’t help but agree with her unspoken expression. He definitely felt like he was dealing with a stranger. One with repressed desire under that quiet exterior. With a fire that he was awed he had unleashed.

  “Does that mean you are sorry?” he croaked, tilting his head to meet her stare evenly. In truth, he knew not what he wished her answer to be. So all he could do was wait.

  #

  Maddie turned away from Nathan’s focused stare. The one that confused her and made her want to do wanton, improper things. Like kiss him again. Like do more than kiss him. She couldn’t think when he was looking at her like she was a sweet treat.

  No one had ever looked at her like that before.

  Or kissed her like that before.

  Or talked to her like that before.

  And she liked it. No, she more than liked it. She loved it. This man knew so little about her, had no ulterior motive or money or position to drive him to her. And yet he wanted her. He seemed to like her.

  What was even better was that he had no preconceived notions of who she was. He didn’t think of her as a wallflower or a thrown over fiancée or boring girl who lived more in books than in the real world. With him, she was a blank slate. She could be the kind of woman who had adventures. Or spoke with ease about any subject.

  She could be the kind of woman who let devastatingly handsome gentlemen kiss her until she could no longer breathe.

  She could be anything. At least for a little while.

  Turning back, she looked at him again. His hair was mussed and his lips were deliciously full from the kiss they had shared. Wouldn’t it be nice to be the kind of girl she’d always read about? To throw caution to the wind with this man, if only for a while?

  It was wrong, of course. Wrong to not tell him her true identity. Wrong to keep him under false impressions. But she wouldn’t do it forever. Just for a little while longer.

  “Maddie?” he asked softly, stepping toward her. “Do you regret the kiss?”

  She smiled even though heat flooded her cheeks. For the first time in her life, she felt bold. “No, Nathan. I don’t regret it. It was… lovely.”

  “Indeed it was,” he said, his voice husky as he lifted his fingers to brush a stray curl away from her cheek.

  She shivered as his ungloved fingertips grazed her skin and stifled a groan when he pulled his hand away and took a long step back.

  “Maddie-” he began.

  She frowned. She could tell from the look on his face th
at he was going to say something dismissive and gentlemanly and probably end their time together. That was the last thing she wanted.

  “Come, let us walk,” she said, stepping past him to pace toward the lake. She heard him sigh softly behind her, but then he caught up with her in three long strides and they moved together to the edge of the water.

  Madeline breathed in the soft scent of green leaves and perfumed flowers. She shut her eyes and let her senses be overwhelmed by the moment. By what she had shared with Nathan. By the possibility of being everything she had ever wanted to be.

  “You look utterly content,” he said softly.

  With a blush, Maddie shot him a side glance. He was staring at her with a strange expression and her heart leapt. It wouldn’t do for him to think she was daft.

  She shrugged. “I so rarely get to enjoy such a scene,” she explained.

  He accepted those words with a quiet nod, then returned his attention to the water. She watched him for a moment, taking in how his bright eyes tracked the movement of a fox on the opposite shore. The way his strong hands flexed at his sides.

  “Do you think anyone is ever perfectly content?” she asked, wishing she could take the words back the instant she said them.

  He turned on her slowly. “I suppose it is what we all strive for, but I think it must be difficult to achieve.”

  With a nod, Maddie frowned. “I have so much about myself that I would like to change.”

  He drew back in surprise. “Do you? Such as?”

  Again heat filled her cheeks, but this time it was pleasure that caused it. The utter shock in his voice, as if he could not imagine her wanting to change anything about herself, was good for her opinion of herself, if nothing else.

  “My fear of horses is one silly thing,” she admitted, thinking of how terrified she had been of Quint the day before. And Nathan had been so kind. “You-you said yesterday that your horse is very gentle, didn’t you?”

  He nodded. “Yes.”

  “I wonder… would you… do you think you might teach me to ride him?” Maddie nearly choked on the bold words. Good heavens, she was as brazen as the heroines in her books!

  And yet Nathan didn’t seem horrified by her forward words. One brow arched slowly, but then he nodded. “If you would like me to, I would be pleased to do so.”

  “Then may we meet tomorrow at the same time?” she asked. “I shall bring a picnic luncheon as a reward for your troubles.”

  He leaned closer. “I would have done it for free, you know. But I never turn down food.”

  She laughed, but her bravado was beginning to fade. It was best to quit while she was still ahead. So, with regret, she glanced toward the path behind them. “I should return to the estate.”

  He nodded and held out an arm. “Very well. I have a few things to attend to if I am to meet with you again tomorrow.”

  Maddie bit her lip. Normally she would have apologized for troubling him, withdrawn her request for his help, even stumbled off in embarrassment. But this was the new her. No apologies.

  At least, not for a while.

  #

  “Is that everything you require, my lord?” Nathan asked as he closed the folder in his hand and looked across the desk at his employer.

  Viscount Marcus Fulton leaned back in his chair and shook his head. “Will you never stop ‘my lording’ me, Blackstone? You have worked for me for seven years and you have never even simply called me Fulton.”

  Nathan sighed. “As we have discussed numerous times, sir, that would be untoward. We are not of rank, so addressing you so informally would be impolite.”

  “As impolite as ignoring my desire that you do so?” Fulton laughed, steepling his fingers.

  “Nearly,” Nathan said, his tone so dry that his words could have blown away in the wind. Immediately, he blanched.

  Fulton sat up. “Good Lord, man, did you just jest with me.” His employer pounded the desk with his palm. “Seven years and I am finally making progress with you, Nathan. Come, have a drink.”

  Nathan opened his mouth, then shut it as his employer pushed to his feet and made his way to the liquor cabinet where he withdrew one of his finest bottles of whiskey. Damn, the man made it hard to refuse.

  “Perhaps one,” he conceded, rising and smoothing his waistcoat awkwardly.

  As Fulton poured, Nathan observed the man. They were of an age. In fact, they had attended Eton at the same time. Fulton had never been anything but friendly to Nathan, although even as a young man Nathan had rebuked those attempts because of the one thing that made them so utterly different.

  Their rank.

  Nathan had spent a lifetime watching his father kowtow and simper and be overly familiar with men of higher rank. And he had watched his sire be played a fool and made the butt of every joke imaginable.

  Nathan had vowed, at the tender age of ten, never to allow himself to be put in such a situation. Still, it was difficult. Fulton was amusing, intelligent and for some reason he kept trying to make a friendship with Nathan. And sometimes, like today, Nathan wished he could reciprocate.

  Especially since he had no one to talk to about what had transpired between himself and Maddie. That kiss that had been haunting him since they parted ways hours before.

  “So what has brought on this sudden surge of friendliness?” Fulton asked as he handed Nathan a glass. He motioned to two chairs by the fire.

  Nathan hesitated before he moved to one of them slowly. “If I have been unfriendly, my lord-”

  “Great God, don’t start with that again,” Fulton groaned as he took a sip of the amber liquid. “You have never been anything but utterly polite and completely appropriate, so don’t spend the next ten minutes apologizing. I only meant that today you seem… different. And since you have been absolutely the same for so many years, I am intrigued. What is it? Did you win money? Get into a fight? Meet a woman?”

  Nathan stiffened and Fulton’s face broke into a broad grin. “Aha! A woman. Very good, Blackstone. I have told you before, I think you should wed. Estate managers are always better when they are married and settled. Not that you aren’t ship shape as it is. But think of the money I could make if you were happy every so often.”

  Nathan forced a smile at the other man’s joke, but inwardly he flinched. Happy. Had he been happy before? It didn’t seem like it. Not unhappy, perhaps, but not happy. But when he had been standing by the lake with Maddie, he had experienced a satisfaction, a calm and peace, like he hadn’t known for God knew how long.

  “Who is she?” Fulton pressed.

  Nathan glanced at his employer cautiously, ever aware of the line that separated them. But also aware of how much he needed a confidante.

  “She works for Lord Heatherton,” he finally admitted.

  “Ah, Heatherton, a good chap, indeed,” Fulton said with a nod of his head. “And do you like the young lady?”

  Nathan shifted under his employer’s scrutiny. Fulton had never minced words and now he was getting to the heart of the matter. A heart Nathan wasn’t sure he was ready to examine.

  “I-I do like her, my lord,” he said slowly. “I like her a great deal. She is not like any other woman I have ever met.”

  Fulton’s expression changed slightly. A hint of wistfulness came over his face. “Ah, lucky man. Most of the women I meet are sadly interchangeable. You know, you’ve been watching them these past few weeks.”

  The two men shuddered in unison and Nathan couldn’t help but exchange a smile with Fulton over the frivolous nature of his houseguests.

  “I say if you like the girl, you should throw caution to the wind,” Fulton said, finishing off his drink.

  Nathan set his own glass aside and frowned. “I am not certain.”

  Fulton tilted his head to observe Nathan closer. “Ah yes, I realize that is not a comfortable notion for you. And I-” he hesitated. “I understand why.”

  Nathan stiffened. “Sir?”

  Fulton shrugged. “Look, Bl
ackstone, we went to school together. Even though you kept yourself separate from those of rank, I did hear you speak of your father a few times. And I met him once before his death when his employer met with my father.”

  Nathan swallowed hard, clenching his jaw as he tried to remain stoic. “I see.”

  “I never mentioned it because you never have invited much personal interaction with me. But I do like you Nathan. You are a good man and I think we could have been friends in another life.” Fulton got to his feet. “I want you to know that you are nothing like your father. No one has ever met you while you worked for me who wasn’t impressed by your skill and demeanor. You are respected everywhere you go.”

  Nathan stood and straightened his shoulders. “And that, my lord, is why I must continue on as I have. Throwing caution to the wind could easily reverse those good opinions I have earned.”

  Fulton shook his head. “There is a middle ground, Blackstone. Someplace where you could be human around men of rank and still maintain your decorum. I do hope someday you will find that middle ground.” The other man stepped forward and clapped a hand on his shoulder briefly. “If you do, we’ll have to play billiards together. I hear from others on the staff that you’re brilliant and it has been a long time since someone bested me.”

  Nathan nodded. “Yes sir. Good afternoon.”

  Fulton strode around his desk and settled into his seat. “Good afternoon, Blackstone.”

  Slowly, Nathan left the other man’s company and gently shut the door behind himself. In the hallway he expelled a long breath. He had never opened up to Fulton like that before. And somehow, it wasn’t as horrible as he had imagined. He hadn’t sunk to a level of groveling, nor made himself too much an equal of the man. Both were things his father had done regularly.

  Still, he wondered at Fulton’s statement. Could he throw caution to the wind, at least in some areas of his life. Be human, as Fulton had put it, and still maintain his pride?

  Because at present Nathan was sorely tempted to do both. To share more of himself. Only he wanted to do it with Maddie.

 

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